
| kuren18 #1302230 2 months ago |
And Now it's time for Bum Reviews with Chester A. Bum.
Tonight's review: My Little Pony: A Canterlot Wedding, Part 2. OOOOOOH MY GOD THIS IS THE GREATEST EPISODE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE! I now pronounce you SPOILERS! So the last episode, Twilight Sparkle sinks into the floor with a green bubble created by an evil Princess Cadence! And Twilight wakes up to find herself in a fun house! Hooray! But, it's a fun house nopony knows about and she can't really get out of. And the evil Cadence uses it to taunt Twilight while she's prisoner. Horru. So Twilight tries to use her magic to blast the evil Cadence! Even though... they're clearly reflections in funhouse mirrors... Did going into this place make Twilight lose a few IQ points? That's not very difficult for me to believe, you know! I once lost a few IQ points just from sitting in a room! Though it did have a TV playing The Room... But I digress. So Twilight blasts a hole in one of the walls with her magic! And then she finds Princess Cadence! But this one's the real Princess Cadence that babysat Twilight when she was a little filly! And they have a little reunion! -sniff- it was so touching! So the real Princess Cadence says that the other one is fake! And they have to get to the wedding before Shining Armor marries the not-Princess Cadence! And so the real Cadence and the fake Cadence sing a duet about their plans! The fake Cadence sings about how she's going to marry Shining Armor even though she doesn't love him and doesn't care about anything else, Wait, then why is she going to marry-? >whispering from off-camera. What? >more whispers Oh, I'll find out later? >more whispers Oh, okay. And the real Cadence sings about how she really does love him! So there's a scene of Twilight and Cadence trying to find their way out of the caves! But then they're cornered by Lyra, Colgate, and... uh... Random Unicorn! Do they escape? We don't know! They just cut to the wedding going on up above! So Celestia is about to pronounce fake Cadence and Shining Armor as married! But then Twilight and Cadence burst in and they're like: "Stop!" "She's fake! Because I'm the real one!" And so it's revealed that the fake Cadence is a succubus! -slap- I mean... Change-ling! -ding- Who turn into your loved one and feed off your love for them! Wow, now I want to be careful of my crack pipe... And not only a Change-ling, but the queen of the change-lings! Because they feed off love, they want to conquer Equestria and feed off all the love that's there, and they're starting with Canterlot! But then Celestia steps in and is like: "NOT SO FAST!" And so there's a spell battle between Celestia and the Queen! And I'm like: "Celestia's going to kick FLANK!" But then the queen defeats Celestia! -gasp- >cue sad battle death music NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Apparently Shining Armor's love for Cadence was so strong it made the queen that much more powerful! So Celestia tells the ponies that the Elements of Harmony are the last chance they have at defeating the queen! So the ponies run through the town to get to them! But meanwhile, the change-ling minions are throwing themselves at the giant bubble gum ball Shining Armor created, and eventually break it! So they come crashing down in the streets of Canterlot like a friggin' mortar attack! So the ponies get to the armory, but find the way blocked by a bunch of changelings! So they try to fight, but because they can change form, they turn into hundreds of copies of the Mane Six! So they begin to fight! And it's friggin' epic! It was kind of like I watched Lord of the Rings after smoking a Twilight Sparkle doll! And Pinkie PIe uses her party cannon as a weapon! I'm totally freaking serious! I always knew that cannon was lethal! So Twilight and her friends totally kick the minions flankes! But then the armory is filled with thousands of them! And I'm like: "Hooray, another fight scene!" But, they just surrender. Oh come on! What's another hundred thousand? So they're returned back to where the wedding was happening! Where Celestia is stuck in a gooey green cocoon... Wow, did we just dive into that marmalade pony's crack fantasy? Not even my crack fantasies are -that- weird! So anyway, now that it seems that the Changelings won, the queen sings a song about how everything worked out for her! But then Twilight sneaks away and frees the real Cadence, who makes Shining Armor snap out of it! And he realizes he can't repel all of the bad guys because there are just too many of them! So then Cadence is like: "My love for you will help power your spell!" And the Queen is like: "Oh please, as if that power of love crap really works..." Did we just walk into the Nostalgiama Critic's mind? So anyway, they try the spell anyway, and it works! -sniff- it was so beautiful! So all the bad guys are flung so far away that they won't be coming back for hundreds of years! And everything's back to normal! So Twilight and her friends get ready for the -real- wedding! And it turns out that the real Cadence is a really fun Princess! She loves Applejack's treats, Rarity's Dress, and Pinkie's party planning! Oh, and she totally doesn't cast evil green spells on Shining Armor, but, that's not important. So the two actually get married! And Celestia tells them that it's important to trust your instincts, like what Twilight was doing when she felt that the other Cadence was fake! And so the real Cadence and Shining Armor actually kiss! Wow, I never thought there would be any kissing in this show! Though at least they didn't go to second base like in Breaking Dawn. -rimshot- So then Rainbow Dash does a Sonic Rainboom for the wedding! And then there's the reception with the two slow dancing! And then Princess Luna comes in and is like: "Hey, nice party! Did I miss anything?" Everypony's favorite Princess, people! She sleeps through an invasion of evil minions from the Story of the Blanks video game and doesn't even notice it the day after! But then Pinkie Pie pulls Vinyl Scratch from out of a DJ booth and they play a song with Twilight singing! So the wedding is a success, and Cadence and Shining Armor live happily ever after! But then Spike is like: "Just wait till you see what I've got for the Bachelor Party!" Seriously, Spike? You're like, five years old, and I don't think there are any strippers in Equestria! But, they just all laugh it off. The End! In all, I liked this episode. It was the most EPIC EPISODE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE! I just hope it can tie me over for the summer. This is Chester A. Bum saying, CHANGE! YA GOT CHANGE? Ah, come on, help a guy out, will ya? Come on, change! Come on, I promise I'll sell you secret pictures I took there! I have one of Tori Spelling drinking an entire bottle of Jack Daniel's! |
| Don #1302384 2 months ago |
I'd love for NC to do a review like this. He already showed that he knows FiM in Ask that guy. |
| Kawa #1303151 2 months ago |
He even remembered to flub "nostalgia" :D |
| Psychopomf #1303556 2 months ago |
These are always entertaining to read after an episode! |
| Karthek #1306790 2 months ago |
Oh Chester, I shall miss your amusing reviews of the episodes! Here's to one hell of a season, everybrony! |
| Step-chan #1346606 2 months ago |
XD
So awesome! |