
| kuren18 #1235147 3 months ago |
And now it's time for Bum Reviews with Chester A. Bum.
Tonight's review: ... What? No, seriously, how do I pronounce this? Fuck it. The one about the mystery on the train! ... OOOOOH MY GOD THIS IS THE GREATEST EPISODE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE! Who did these SPOILERS? There's this pony, named Pinkie Pie, And she's bringing a cake Mr. and Mrs. Cake made to Canterlot to put in a competition! And so since the technology of Equestria is in the 1800s... I... think... The only way to get there is by train! And so all of Pinkie's friends go with her on the way to Canterlot! But then these three other chefs are coming with them with their own creations for the contest! There's a French griffon, An old donkey woman, and Pony Joe! And so they're all like: "My treat is the best and it's going to win!" "Piss off! My treat is going to kick yours to Appleoosa!" "Well, I'm French so I should surrender... but I won't because I'm unbelievably snooty!" So Pinkie Pie decides to stand guard all night in front of the cake because she's afraid the other chefs will sabotage it! But then she's distracted by three suspicious events during the night! But it's OK, the cake appears to be fine. Until the morning when Twilight wakes Pinkie up to point out that there are bites taken out of it! -gasp- So Pinkie immediately proceeds to accuse each of the chefs with some of the best made-up accusations ever! The French griffon was an old-time silent film villain who tied Pinkie to the train track and cut the cake in half, Pony Joe was James Bond and cut the cake with lasers, And the old Donkey was a ninja! I always knew Pony Joe was Equestria's James Bond! -sings in the tune of the James Bond theme- Friendship is maaa-a-a-gic... ...And I love, do-o-nuts... In fact, he's better than James Bond! Nopony thought Pinkie was telling the truth! And on the other hoof, everypony knows James Bond is a secret agent! Every villain always knows he's coming, greets him by name, and knows his weakness is hot girls! Actually, can I tell you a secret? -whisper- I'm a spy! Nopony knows because I'm in disguise right now. And I've been fired years ago. But that doesn't stop me from finding drug dealers! My dealers won't even know what's coming! But I digress. So Twilight tells Pinkie that her accusations are random and they need to look for clues! But then the train goes into a tunnel and everything goes dark! But when they leave the tunnel, all of the other treats have been eaten, too! -gasp- So Twilight takes Pinkie Pie around the train and looks for clues! But Twilight finds three clues that... we don't get to see. Horru. But then Twilight knows who did-dun-do'd it! So she calls in everypony and says: "I found this BLUE FEATHER!" -gasp- "And this PINK HAIR!" -gasp- "And this FAKE EYELASH!" -faints- "Which means Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Rarity all took bites out of the cake!" OH MY GOD I knew Rarity was a klepto! No wonder she has all those gems! She pulled heists to get half of them! I need to go ship myself with her when I'm done. I could get a lot of change for that! But then that still leaves the mystery of who ate the other desserts in the tunnel! And I'm like: "Well there's only one pony left it could be... APPLEJACK!" But, it turns out that each of the other chefs ate each others' desserts. So all this while Applejack is like: "Y'all are crazy!" So the chefs put what's left of their desserts together to make one big dessert for the contest! And Pinkie writes a letter about not jumping to conclusions! And then Celestia is about to eat some cake! And I'm like: "NO! Haven't you read the tabloids? Everypony thinks you're fat!" But then Pinkie Pie eats the entire cake in one bite! So then I'm like: "Oh, okay." The end! So I really liked this episode! Except it made me really hungry. I think I'm going to go read the fanfiction I wrote where I shipped myself with Pinkie Pie! We ate so much cake and sweets... This is Chester A. Bum saying, CHANGE? YA GOT CHANGE? Ah come on, help a guy out, will ya? Come on, change! Well at least get me a donut! I need to appease Pony Joe so he doesn't suspect that I'm on to him! |
| KirbyfanNeox #1235203 3 months ago |
Um... lol? |
| Joe_Habana #1235220 3 months ago |
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| Anonymous #1235236 3 months ago |
Very good, still, but I'm begining to think you're losing the style of these things a bit. Needs less constant references to shipping. |
| Anonymous #1235239 3 months ago |
Well done *throws some change |
| Bolan #1235286 3 months ago |
SHIPPING OMG. |
| Step-chan #1235394 3 months ago |
Applause!!!! |
| BlazBrony #1235406 3 months ago |
Yeah, cut down on the shipping jokes and you'll be golden, the rest of the review I thought was pretty awesome. |
| Anonymous #1235629 3 months ago |
THIS IS THE GREATEST OC THAT I'VE EVER SEEN |
| Anonymous #1237112 3 months ago |
WHY DOES THIS GUY HAVE FANS. WHY.
IT'S NOT RIGHT I TELL YOU. IT'S NOT FUCKING RIGHT. |
| Benno #1237517 3 months ago |
Change for you! |
| Karthek #1239058 3 months ago |
I agree.
Pony Joe> James Bond. |
| Anonymous #1276257 2 months ago |
Try to change up your jokes. This one is staler than Pony Poe's LEFTOVER donuts. |