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| Anonymous #1214431 3 months ago |
Not as much as I need to rid the world of that fuck Billy Bob and his bum boy Jethro.
Also, if the fluffy is going to die anyway out in the wild, why waste a bullet? Man, fuck Billy Bob, i'd stick the gun up his ass and blow his brains out. |
| Impious #1214463 3 months ago |
I'd ask for a sniper rifle instead. After all, I wouldn't want to miss.
Maybe an anti-materiel rifle with explosive rounds. Take out the critter then turn around and wipe out the good ol' boys. Granted, the recoil would probably take my arm off, but I've always wanted to be a cyborg. |
| Anonymous #1214520 3 months ago |
^> You look at your pocket
>You think of the little, anonymous letter with a BIG amount of cash inside and a single, elegantly written note >"Do what we agreed on. I.S." >You smile to Billy Bob, then turn around and give him the rifle >"I'm a lousy shot, maybe you could do better" >Bob complains about shitty helpers, picks up the rifle and fires >He doesn't notice that you switched a bullet, much less that you walked away >You're barely far enough to escape the detonation >You wonder where did mr. I.S. (whoever he is) find a fake, nitroglycerin filled bullet >You check the thick wad of hundred dollar bills in the envelope >You decide that you don't give a flying fuck |
| Anonymous #1215031 3 months ago |
How much do bullets cost? Maybe I'm ignorant, but they can't be that much less than 65 cents. Not less enough to bother shooting it. |
| Anonymous #1215120 3 months ago |
That's the joke, #031 - that Billy-Bob's doing all of this not out of practical farming wisdom, but out of a sick fantasy where he's a man's man and it mostly consists of being "necessarily cruel" to animals.
It's a subversion of the original Fluffy Pony farm stories, where all of the cruelty was only out of an apathetic sense of workmanship, but the farm as described didn't make any economic sense - whatever was true was what would give the authour the most opportunities to show his protagonist doing terrible things to the fluffy ponies. If he'd made economic reality part of his story, even when it meant he missed an opportunity to inflict suffering on the fluffies, this subversion wouldn't work at all. It's only because the accounting not making sense undermines the key appeal of the story that this parody works. |
| Anonymous #1215148 3 months ago |
^you're applying waaaaaayyy too much logic to a greentext story made on 4chan. |
| fluff474 #1215365 3 months ago |
@1214431: There might be laws against abandoning fluffy ponies near populated areas, since a lot of stories have strays as a major problem.
@1215148: Care to explain how 1215031 is right and 1215120 wrong? |
| Anonymous #1215673 3 months ago |
A story made by an autist who focuses too much on the economical nonsense in another story about a fictional farm that breeds and sells imaginary critters that look like the retarded love-child of a sheep, a pig and a small horse who drowns by simply looking at water and explodes when giving birth. Wonderful.
Soon, only autists will remain that will write about fluffy ponies. |
| Anonymous #1223693 3 months ago |
^Fluffy pony fans were only ever autists.
MLP fans were only ever autists. You're an autist. I'm an autist. Everyone's an autist. Autist autist autist autist autist autist autist autistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautistautist |