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| kuren18 #1006916 5 months ago |
And now it's time for Bum Reviews with Chester A. Bum.
Tonight's review: My Little Pony: Hearts and Hooves Day. OOOOOOOOH MY GOD THIS IS THE GREATEST EPISODE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE! My Little SPOILERS! There's this pony, named Cheerilee! And she's the teacher at Ponyville's school! And she's like the GREATEST TEACHER I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE! The CMCs love her so much, they made this big, huge valentine for her for Valentine- I mean, Hearts and Hooves Day! And the CMCs are like: "Well, this'll probably be nothing compared to what your very special somepony's gonna get you!" I'm really trying to not find that dirty. But Cheerilee is like: "Oh, I don't have a special somepony, I'm all right by myself!" And the CMCs are like: "OH MY GOD! We need to get her a very special somepony!" So they go around Ponyville to try and find Cheerilee a stallion! But for some reason there are a lot of really weird ponies in Ponyville! There's a pony who bathes in giant jars of marmalade! I'm totally freaking serious! It did -look- like I was having a crack fantasy, But if it was really having a crack fantasy, I'd be bathing in alcohol. But I digress. So they finally decide to play matchmaker and agree that Big Macintosh is the best stallion for Cheerilee! -I- played matchmaker once! It's quite obvious that I'm the perfect stallion for Dərpy Hooves, Princess Luna, and Berry Punch. So anyway, they try to get them together by setting up a romantic picnic and bringing the two to the same spot! And Cheerilee is like: "This is so awkward..." And Big Mac is like: "Eeeeyup." "Let's just go." "Eeeeeeyup." So the CMCs are really sad that their plan didn't work! But then Twilight Sparkle comes by and says something about a love potion she read about in one of her books! And the CMCs are like: "Yoink!" So they use the book to make a love potion! -I- made a love potion, once! It didn't work. So they give the love potion to Big Mac and Cheerilee! And they immediately fall in love! But then they're like: "You're my schmoopy!" "No you're schmoopy!" And the CMCs are like: "EEEW! They've become cheesier than a block of Velveeta!" So they look back into the book, and they find out that it was actually a love poison, more than a potion! -gasp- And they find out that if they don't give them the antidote, Ponyville will be filled with uneducated, starving ponies! That's bullcrap! That's not a terrible scenario, that's exactly what my street corner is like! And I'm totally fine! Please shoot me. So they find out that the only antidote is to prevent them from looking into each other's eyes for a full hour! So they think of the best way to do that: Have them get married! Well, actually they're not -really- going to get married, They're just going to have them get -ready- to get married. So they take Big Mac to the jewelry shop to get a ring for Cheerilee, while they take Cheerilee to Carousel Boutique to get a wedding dress! And at first it seems to work! But then Big Mac just runs towards the boutique to find Cheerilee! And it turns out that Big Mac is like -really- freaking strong! He pulls a cart full of anvils with no effort at all! And even pulls a freaking house when Apple Bloom tries to tie him to it! But fortunately, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle have THE GREATEST IDEA I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE! They dig a hole! -I- dug a hole to solve a problem, once! They'll never find that hooker. So Big Mac falls into the hole! But he calls out for Cheerilee, and she breaks out of Carousel Boutique to go look into his eyes! But the time is almost up! And Cheerilee is running! And Big Mac is Jumping! And Cheerilee is running! And Big Mac is Jumping! And then they crash into each other just as the clock rings off the hour! Did it work? Of course it did! So the two are at the bottom of the hole and are like: "Um, what the hay just happened?" And the CMCs are like: "Well, we... kinda sorta gave you a love poison... but it's because we wanted you to be happy! But we learned that we shouldn't mess with another pony's love lives." And Cheerilee is like: "Well, I'm glad you learned that, but you're still going to be punished by being forced to do all of Big Mac's chores!" So while the CMCs are doing Big Mac's chores later in the day, he and Cheerilee come by to check up on them! And they totally parasprite them by pretending that they're still under the influence of the poison! The end! So I really liked this episode! Except for Big Mac! He... Uh... Yeah, I never wrote a self-insert shipping fanfic with him. So he's totally cool! This is Chester A. Bum saying, CHANGE! YA GOT CHANGE? Ah come on, help a guy out, will ya? Come on, change! Well at least get me some money to buy what's left of the love poison from the CMCs! I wanna give it to Luna, Dərpy, and Berry Punch and then myself! |
| mindcannon #1006938 5 months ago |
GET A JOB YOU HIPPIE |
| Psychopomf #1006940 5 months ago |
I was waiting for this!
Seriously though. These are like icing on the cake after watching an episode. Aside from the screencaps with amusing facial expressions. And people making insane fan theories about background characters. And shippers making conclusions that that episode somehow makes their ship viable And... You get what I mean. Chester x Berry Punch OTP |
| Wheezie_Moonflower #1007340 5 months ago |
it was sort of like the plot for one episode of M*A*S*H. Hawkeye and B.J. keep Frank Burns and Hot Lips Houlihan apart by fiddling around with their leisure schedules, distracting them with errands, even putting ether in Burn's aftershave so that he passes out. I was thinking that was happening here, but then I realized, Bic Mac doesn't use aftershave. |
| Anonymous #1007342 5 months ago |
HERE'S TWENTY BITS, NOW GET OFF THE MEDIAN! |
| jim123456789 #1007430 5 months ago |
Bits?! You got any bits?! Oh, come on, help a pony out! |
| Step-chan #1011732 5 months ago |
^__^ |