
| NK_6060 #832040 6 months ago |
3rd in a series of limes that... WERE supposed to be out before New Year's, but life got in the way. But I'm going to keep up with them at the very least.
So here's a new one for me - writing from a perspective of a female 2nd person story. I'm not entirely happy with how it turned out, but I'd like to hear your opinions on it. |
| Harlequin_Jester #832055 6 months ago |
I think less elaboration should have gone into the set up and more elaboration should have gone into the sensual scene. |
| Anonymous #834373 6 months ago |
I'll echo harlequin; this one didn't have as much of a connection as the previous one did. Honestly, there was more of a connection between the protagonist and Dizzy Twister.
On that note, I don't know that this can be labelled "straight." "Bi" would be more apt. And it's not bad, I think it just needed to be a bit longer. |