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| kuren18 #795855 7 months ago |
And now it's time for Bum Reviews with Chester A. Bum
Tonight's review: My Little Pony: Hearth's Warming Eve OOOH MY GOD THIS IS THE GREATEST MOVIE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE! My Little SPOILERS! So the episode starts out with all the ponies taking a train to Canterlot! And it's so they can help celebrate a pony holiday called Hearth's Warming Eve! Which is kind of like Christmas! Except... ... No, it's exactly like Christmas. Eeeexcept without the whole Jesus thing. Hooray! So it turns out that the ponies have been invited to be the lead roles in a play about the founding of Equestria! So, it's a show within a show! And I'm like: OH MY GOD! My Little Pony just crossed over with Inception! -plays the Inception music- So the play starts! And it turns out that ponies weren't always the loving and tolerating things we know them today! They used to be mean and mistrusting! But they were forced to cooperate because only Earth Ponies can grow food, Pegasi are the only ones that can control weather, And Unicorns can raise the sun and moon. But one day there's a really bad winter that makes the Earth Ponies unable to grow food! So everypony's starving! And I'm like, "Buck up, you freaking pansies! I'm starving all the time, live on the streets, and I'm just fine!" Please shoot me. So they convene a summit between the three tribe leaders! And they're like: "Piss off!" "No you piss off!" "Go to Hell!" It was like the GREATEST SUMMIT I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE! It was just like watching any given political debate! -rimshot- So all the tribes go their separate ways to find a new land! And eventually they all do! But then they find out that they all just claimed the same place. -I- went out and claimed land once! No one can touch me so long as I'm standing on this puddle of piss I made in the alleyway off 7th street! That is the territory of Chesteria! The land of change! So they start arguing about whose land it really is! But then it suddenly becomes winter and they have to find shelter! So they shelter in the only cave they could find! And they argue some more! But it turns out that each time they start arguing, it gets colder! And eventually the cave opening freezes up! And there's more arguing! And I'm like: "Did the channel suddenly change to Pony C-Span or something?" But it's OK! There were commercial breaks that kept telling me what I was watching! And that's great! I need to be reminded what I'm watching sometimes! I once thought the new Transformers was a documentary about metal yard scraps! Oh wait, maybe it was... So anyway, the three leaders keep arguing! And eventually they all freeze over! And so the other ponies are like: "What's going on?" "Oh my God! It's because of these ghost horses that feed off of hate! They make things colder when they feel more hatred!" But just before the rest of them freeze solid, they say that they don't hate each other! And then the ice around them shatters! Hooray! So they spend time talking, and singing, And once their leaders thaw out, they all see the error of their ways and join together to create Equestria! The End! And then the ponies take a bow sing the Equestrian National Anthem, And then proceed to argue backstage. But then they hear the sound of ghosts above them and they're like, "I still love you though!" "Me too!" The end! So I really liked this episode! It made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside! ...from the bonfire of everypony's fan-canon bursting into flames. ZING! This is Chester A. Bum saying, CHANGE! YA GOT CHANGE? Ah come on, help a guy out, will ya? Come on, change! Well at least get me some more fuel for the fire I've got! Any of those fanfictions about the creation of Equestria will do perfectly! |
| Anonymous #795873 7 months ago |
Great but you could add the episode title to the picture. |
| Anonymous #795878 7 months ago |
Excellent work as usual! Hilarious and spot-on! |
| Fuzzy_Logic #795881 7 months ago |
i'd hit it |
| sigh #795890 7 months ago |
Bum Reviews of each episode is one of my favorite things to read every week. |
| Anonymous #795893 7 months ago |
Jack Sparrow? |
| Clover_Patch #795895 7 months ago |
OHHH! That's why it keeps being reposted! There's WORDS under it! |
| marioandsonic #796256 7 months ago |
kuren18, I love you so much. |
| Step-chan #797404 7 months ago |
XD |
| Killette2 #797497 7 months ago |
So his special talent in life is being a bum? That must really suck... |