
| GeminiSaint #751690 7 months ago |
Artist's note:
"UPDATE: An anon at Ponibooru came up with a better rhyme for the 9th panel, 2nd speech balloon, so I went and put that in. Sorry for the original "rhyme" (wherein I attempted to rhyme "sound" with "bone"). What can I say? Unlike Zecora, I can't rhyme. Also English isn't my first language, so there's that too." |
| Gittonsxv #751691 7 months ago |
why does this make sense -.-....OH WELL |
| Anonymous #751722 7 months ago |
"would have still not be" should be "would not still be". |
| Anonymous #751737 7 months ago |
Vote +1 |
| Vree #751751 7 months ago |
first version >>95724 |
| Vree #751764 7 months ago |
The death of language is going to be everyone speaking the Common Tongue of a second language. We all won't be able to speak fluently or use proper grammar or rhyme and but no-one else will be able to tell if we did anyway.
^^^also, Anon is right. You are thinking what'd correctly be "have been" (Present Perfect), but that is not the correct tense here anyway, "would not still be" should be used instead. |
| NotAPseudonym #751787 7 months ago |
If you're happy about correcting this further... "I would have not still be around" isn't much better (because it changes tenses, possibly twice?). It doesn't scan either. And it's a tautology.
Try: > Oh goodness me! I fell from the tree! > It is good I was not far off the ground, > or maybe I would not still be around. (It's still a little awkward-sounding imo. Anybody got anything better?) You're not trying to rhyme 'seek' with 'think' in the last panel either I hope? Because... no. > And that, my dear friend, is the story > of how my speech pattern came to be. (Not as fluid as I'd like either...) |
| Vree #752542 7 months ago |
Well, it's a cute comic either way. |
| Anonymous #752570 7 months ago |
The rhymes are good enough to get the point across, I think. It doesn't have to be perfect. |
| Anonymous #754380 7 months ago |
Wow i was the one who made that new rhyme in the first version. AWESOME!!! |
| NightJack #757806 7 months ago |
dupe >>95802 |
| ThePowerofANON #757809 7 months ago |
Moon joke imminent. |
| Robomorons #757847 7 months ago |
@NightJack: Technically not a dupe since there are some small but noticable difference between the two. |
| GeminiSaint #757899 7 months ago |
3rd time's the charm, I guess? |