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kuren18
#739042
7 months ago
And now it's time for Bum Reviews with Chester A. Bum.

Tonight's review:

My Little Pony: Sweet and Elite.

OOOOH MY GOD THIS IS THE GREATEST EPISODE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE!

My Little SPOILERS!

There's this pony, named Rarity,

And she's visiting Canterlot!

-I- visited Canterlot, once!

Who would have ever guessed they made pony-related names for crack?

So while she's there, some really fancy pants ponies come up to her and say:

"Oh, I adorrrrrrrrre your hat... where -did- you get it?"

And before Rarity can reply, the window cleaner above her starts being a total idiot!

He's like:

"Well gol-ly, there's Rarity from Ponyville!"

And the upper-crusty ponies are like:

"Oh... never mind, then... we've got more upper-crusty things to be doing like drinking expensive hard liquor and eating snails."

I hated that pony! He makes all us bums that have jobs look bad!

But then another fancy pony, who's oddly enough named Fancy Pants, bumps into her!

So he finds out that Rarity knows Princess Celestia personally!

And he's like:

"Oh my! It looks like you're well-connected! Want to come to the races with me?"

And Rarity's like:

"Well I've gotta work on a dress for a friend, but on the other hand, you're the most important pony in canterlot, so... YES!"

-I- went to the races, once!

No one ever gives you real money there! They just give you these stupid pieces of green paper!

So she goes to the races, and afterwards gets invited to all these sophisticated gatherings!

And she keeps going to them because she wants to do well for her business!

And at the same time she only partially completes Twilight's dress!

And then she's invited to a party at Canterlot castle on the same day of Twilight Sparkle's birthday party!

So she's thinking really hard about which one to go to!

And then she writes a big long excuse about not being able to come to Twilight's party!

But then all of a sudden, there's a knock at the door!

Don't open it, Rarity! Haven't you read muffins? It'll be worse with somepony who can use magic and is personally mad at you!

But it turns out, it's all of her friends, who decided to come up to Canterlot and celebrate the party there!

And Rarity's like:

-head explodes-

And to make matters worse, the party's being held in the room right next to the fancy party!

So she tries to be present at both parties at the same time!

-I- tried to be in two places at once once!

Everypony told me it couldn't be done!

But it can always be done with drugs!

So Rarity's friends notice that she wants to attend the fancy party!

And they do the most logical thing they can think of:

Attend the party with her and continue celebrating Twilight's party!

So it turns into a huge mess!

Twilight starts dancing like a white person,

Applejack gets obsessed with picking weeds,

Pinkie blasts her party cannon all over the place

Soooo many ponies died...

And Fluttershy brings out a bunch of birds!

And all the fancy ponies are like:

"Rarity, do you know these ponies?"

And Rarity is like:

Um...

uh...

Well you see...

And Twilight Sparkle is like:

"Oh of course you do! We're the best of friends!"

And all the fancy ponies are like:

-faints-

And Rarity is like:

"Yes, yes I do know them! I'm from Ponyville, and I've learned that where you're from is something to be proud of!"

And Fancy Pants is like:

"Well, I am surprisingly OK with this!"

I agree! In fact, it applies to me, too!

I -love- being from an empty spray can!

This is Chester A. Bum saying,

CHANGE! Ya got change? Ah come on, help a guy out, will ya? Come on, change!

Come on, I promise I'll use it to help support Rarity's business! I have tons of uses for dresses!

... Wait, I shouldn't have gone with that. CHANGE!
Anonymous
#739048
7 months ago
*gives some change*
ZePassionateOne
#739054
7 months ago
Never stop doing these, this is amazing.
Green_LED
#739065
7 months ago
*claps* We want more.
Dionysus
#739376
7 months ago
Great as always, but you did that "-I- verb xyz once" three times, I don't remember a Bum review with so many uses of this joke. Maybe cut it down to two or one. Just a suggestion, still love it !
Step-chan
#740800
7 months ago
LMFAO

XD
Anonymous
#1163970
3 months ago
He ripped this off from that episode of South Park.

But seriously, each and every one of these videos is the EXACT SAME THING. What the fuck am I missing here, people?!