>"Hey, Anon. What's up?"
>"Nel, we need to talk. Your popularity is pretty low compared to all the other bat ponies."
>"My- my popularity? Who with? What are you even..."
>"Now I've talked it over with Rarity and I think we can do something about that. We'll get you a new hair style and some new accessories. She even thinks that Princess Twilight can do something about that cutie mark."
>"What's wrong with my cutie mark?"
>"Nothing! Nothing. It's just not very hip, ya know? Heh-heh. Hip. Cutie mark. You bat ponies aren't the only ones with puns. Anyway, we'll get you a new cutie mark that has a little more sizzle. Nothing slutty, mind you, just something a little sexier than some metal working tools."
>"Anon this is insane."
>"Hey, don't blame me. I just run with the numbers and right now the numbers say that you need to up your brand appeal. Anyway, Fluttershy knows this life coach dude who we can help with your persona and media..."
>"Goodbye, Anon."
>"...and then we need to get you involved with a celebrity so we can leak to the media when you'll be going on dates out in public. Hmm... not too many male celebs on this world. Hey, I know your strait Nel, but what would saw to taking one for the team and dating a mare? Nel? Nel? 
>Now where did she get off to?"