>Day 'Happy Birthday!' in Equestria.
>Not yours. No, instead it's Gloom Wing's.
>The Royal Guard celebrates birthdays.
>So you get to wear a nice pointy party hat with Gloom Wing.
>While standing guard outside of Celestia's chambers.
>For her part, she is prancing in place with her eyes closed.
>Blowing on a noise maker.
>It's three in the morning.
>Your eye twitches.
“Gloom Wing! Keep it down! Princess Celestia is sleeping behind these doors!”
>Gloom Wing turns to you, wearing the biggest shit-eating grin you've ever seen.
>”Who, Anon? I don't think I've met a ‘Gloom Wing’.”
>She stares right at you, quivering with anticipation.
>You stop yourself from strangling her.
“Fine. GLOOMIE. Shut up.”
>She drops her noise maker, throws her hooves to her face, and squees, her eyes shining like a foal's on Hearth's Warming Eve.
>”Hehehehehehehe! You said it! You used my nickname!”
“Only because you wouldn't shut up! Now act like a guard!”
>She visibly swallows her glee and shifts her face back to the stony visage of a guard.
>You give it five minutes before she starts again.
>It wasn't so bad, though. At least on her birthday you wouldn’t have to run laps.
>You sigh and try to focus on your job. You scan the hallway up and down, looking into the shadows for any intruders.
>Yup, boring as fuck.
>”Uh, hey... Uhm.. Anon”
“What?”
>”Since it's my birthday and all...I was hoping that...you know... we could go out somewhere after our shift?”
>You tilt your head and think about it for a second. For all the trouble Gloom Wing causes you, you don't really hate her. She's a nice mare. Hell, even a friend.
>Unfortunately your delay causes her to panic.
>You turn just in time to see her leaping onto your chest.
>You get knocked on your ass in record time, Gloom Wing sitting on you and giving you puppy-dog eyes.
>“PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE!”
>It keeps rising in pitch until it just sounds like a bat screeching at you.
>Oh god that's weird.
>You cover her mouth with the palm of your hand and stare her in the eyes.
>She breaks into a blush at your touch, her eyes slowly closing and her leathery wings hitting half-mast.
>Fucking Gloom Wing
“If you stop making that noise, fine! We'll go out to a bar or something!”
>Her wings hit full mast and she immediately nods before nuzzling your hand.
>She is also prancing excitedly.
>On your chest.
>Dear sweet god the pain.
>You push her off you and she yelps, landing on her side, her armor making a nice crashing sound through the hall.
>It's at that point you hear a delicate cough from behind you.
>SHIT SHIT SHIT.
>You whip your head around and yup, it's Celestia poking her head outside her door.
>Her hair is jutting out seemingly randomly, a scrunchie holding most of it behind her head.
>One of her eyes was closed and caked with that gross sleep crust.
>The other was barely open, the magenta iris meeting your eyes through the slit.
>Your eyes were wide open and radiating fear.
“Ahem, Anonymous? Could you and Miss Gloom Wing please keep it down? I need to sleep.”
>You were going to destroy Gloom Wing.
“Of-Of course, Princess! Sorry Princess!”
>You go to salute Her Majesty, but you can't get your hand. It's being held.
>You turn to see Gloom Wing holding your hand over her head like a teddy bear, hiding behind it and shaking.
>HHHNNNNNNGGG
>You turn back to a smiling Celestia.
>Maybe she won't send you to Tartarus. How could you ever doubt the benevolent princess?
>”Well, well, maybe you both should take the rest of the night off and relax together?”
>The devil has four hooves.
>”Really!? We can, Your Majesty?!”
>”I wouldn't have it any other way, in fact.”
>Ouch, harsh. Gloom Wing didn't seem to notice though.
>”You hear that, Anon? Let's go party!”
>Still holding your hand, she takes off down the hall, dragging your stupefied ass along.
>After a few minutes, you arrive at your quarters.
>”Okay Anon! I'll be back in like, half an hour! I have to get ready! Oh gosh this is going to be so great!”
>She jumps up and throws her forelegs around you and hugs you fiercely, nuzzling your chest.
>”Thank you for deciding to come, Anon!”
>She falls back to her hooves, hopping back and forth like a filly before darting off.
>How did she know where your quarters were?
>Actually, best not to think about it.
>You turn, open the door, and step inside. Might as well at least get out of your armor.

>You are now Gloom Wing, and you are out of breath.
>You are so excited! Anon said he’ll go out with you tonight!
>It isn't really a date, but it’s like one!
>Maybe if you play your cards right you can even get his hot [spoiler]lips on yours[/spoiler].
>You feel your face turn red at that.
>And from all the running.
>You'd think Anon chose the farthest quarters from yours on purpose!
>Oh well, you finally made it. Tou burst into your room and immediately start digging through your closet, looking for your 'Emergency Date Dress'.
>A mare has to be prepared.
>”There it is! Perfect!”
>A few minutes later you are standing in front of the mirror, looking yourself over for anything out of place.
>You have your short white hair combed and styled into a nice, spunky look. Check.
>Your wings have been cleaned and are soft and supple. Check.
>Your coat is wonderfully groomed and not a single stone gray hair is out of place. Check.
>Frantic breathing and wide, golden, terrified eyes with pinpricks for pupils. Check.
>Perfect! Everything is fine and nothing can go wrong! You flash yourself a confident smile in the mirror and turn to go get Anon. You already have a destination in mind.
>While you're leaving, you reflect on how that smile didn't seem as confident as you wanted.
>Oh well, you have a whole night to spend with Anon! It's not like you could mess this up!
>It's easy, just take him to a nice restaurant, order some drinks, and the rest will just happen.
>You hope.

>You are now Anon.
>And you’ve never been happier to be out of that tin suit.
>That shit is heavy.
>You grab some clothes and go to take a shower.
>Apple Spice body wash.
>Smells like warm apple pie.
>Toweling off, you go to put on your clothes and realize something.
>They’re dingy as fuck.
>It's the clothing in which you came to Equestria.
>Your old blue jeans and washed-out Pink Floyd T-shirt.
>The rainbow was nearly lost in the dark.
>You sigh and put them back. No sense risking them during your night out with Gloom Wing.
>You shudder at the thought.
>Turning back to the rest of your clothes, you grimace.
>You only have one pair of clean clothing left.
>And it's your suit made specifically for when you had to stand guard at the Grand Galloping Gala.
>You shake your head.
>This thing is going to give her the wrong idea and crank the awkward up to eleven.
>You're not wearing dirty clothes though.
>You spend enough time sweating in armor and running laps.
>Fucking Gloom Wing.
>Without a choice you grab it and put it on, turning to look in the mirror.
>You turn around once before nodding in satisfaction. Everything is where it should be.
“Yup, still lookin' good Anon.”
>You brush off your shoulders and step out of your quarters to wait on Gloom Wing.
>It takes about an hour before you start to hear hoof steps echoing down the hall.
>They are halting and occasionally stop to canter in place with a quiet accompaniment of nervous breathing.
>Yup, that's Gloom Wing alright.
>You push yourself off the wall and decide to meet her halfway. You want to actually get some food tonight.
>You turn the corner and see what must be Gloom Wing, based on the startled expression, wide eyes, and nervous pawing.
>Except, damn.
>She looks great.
>She's wearing a simple dark blue dress that trails all the way down past her tail with white ends and seams that match her hair.
>It's a quiet, elegant dress.
>Two things you never thought Gloom Wing could do.
>She actually looked cute!
>Apparently you must look pretty good too.
>She stopped mid paw and is staring at you with wide eyes
>Her wings are twitching.
>You decide to cut it off before it gets worse.
“Gloom Wing, hey, you in there?”
>”YES, I'll MAR-”
>She throws a hoof up to her mouth as her eyes start darting back and forth. Panic attack imminent.
>”I mean, uh-”
>You cut her off, putting a finger to her lips.
“I didn't hear anything. Lets just go get some food, alright?”
>She nods slowly, putting her hoof back down and taking a deep breath and closing her eyes for a moment before opening them, a steely determination burning in their depths. She whispers something under her breath.
>You lean forward and tilt your head.
“What was that, Gloom Wing?”
>She clears her throat and smiles nervously up at you.
>”Oh, uhm, hehe, I said where do you want to eat, Anon?”
>You put a hand to your chin in thought for a moment. It would be a shame to just go to Donut Joe's while you're in such a nice suit.
“Someplace nice... No sense going to some cheap place when I'm this dressed up. You know of a good place?”
>She smiles, her eyes gleaming and nods enthusiastically, wings doing a quick flap in excitement.
 >”Oh, I know just the place, Anon! It's called 'The Star's Fancy'! Let's go!”
>Gloom Wing turns and walks a ways before looking back at you, waiting for you to catch up, a smile stretching across her face.
>Sighing, you get beside her and match her gait, walking out towards the main gate. Looking over the halls, you notice a few of the guards giving you a quiet smirk, knowing how much of a crush Gloom Wing has on you.
>Fucking coworkers.
>You both eventually reach the front gate, Gloom Wing humming softly and practically skipping beside you.
>The gates open and you and Gloom Wing step outside, enjoying the crisp night air for a moment.
>”I want to thank you again for this Anon... So... Thanks for coming out with me tonight.”
>You smile down at Gloom Wing
>For all the trouble she causes you, she really is trying her best.
“Don't worry about it, Gloomie.”
>Her mouth drops open before curving up into a gigantic smile. She hops up and gives you a tight hug and lets loose a squeal.
>”You said Gloomie!”
>You smirk and pat her on the head.
“Did I? Must have slipped. Come on, let’s go get some food. I'm starving.”
>You start to walk off into the cool night air of Canterlot.
>Gloom Wing, eyes closed, skips right beside you.