>You are Anon
>A knock knock knockin' on Ashas' door

>It's been a week since you first met her, and since then you've picked up living in Appaloosa
>They treated you a lot more kindly than Ponyville did, that was for sure
>You remember being approached by an energetic(and you're not a homosexual but you couldn't help but admitting also attractive) stallion
>Who gave you an enthusiastic welcome to the town, and asked if there was anything you needed
"Um. . . A shower and shave, I suppose,"
>You had croaked
>And you took that shower, and it was the best shower ever
>The cold water had been soothing against the back of your head, where Asha's had gotten a home run with her bat
>You had reached behind and touched the great lump that had resulted from the incident, where your hair was sticky with what you'd assumed was blood
>But when you pulled your hand away, there was no red
>Odd
>The ponies of Appaloosa gave you shelter for the first night, and when it came to earning your own living, gave you a job making apple pie
>Sure beat scooping cat litter
>Life in Appaloosa was wonderful, and you doubted you'd ever go back to Ponyville

>Ashas opens the door to her humble wooden shack, and smiles upon seeing you
>"Well hello, Anon. It's been a long time. Come in come in!"
>You comply withh her wishes
"I come bearing gifts!"
>You say, and then hold out a four pack of bottled apple ciders
>"Oh!" She exclaims. At first her expression is of pleasant surprise, but for reasons you do not know it quickly turns into one of some sort of vacant horror
>"Oh shit." she whispers
"Um. . . Something wrong?"
>"Huh? What? Oh, oh no, eveything's fine, everything's fine, just. . ."
>She walks over to her table and pulls out a chair
>"Just, have a seat here. . ."
>She hurries back to you and nudges you towards the table. Confused, you do as she asks
>"Just sit down there, and I'll be right back!"
>She runs out of the house and slams the door behind her.

>Okay.
>You sit and wait for Ashas to return
>Wondering just what she's so worked up about and why cider was the trigger
>You wait ten minutes, fifteen, twenty
>At half an hour you open up one of the bottles of cider
>Screw it, if she wants to just leave and make you wait then you'll start the party without her
>In another half an hour you've downed the whole cider, and Ashas still isn't home
>And then you hear something
>WHAM
>A slight pause
>WHAM
>. . .
>WHAM
>It's coming from outside the door
>You walk over, and tentatively open it
>Ashas is there
>Panting, drenched in sweat and. . .
>What the fuck?
>She's carrying a fucking twenty litre jug full of some yellow liquid
>She stumbles inside
>"Th-Thanks Anon," she mumbles
>She let's the jug roll off her back and moans
>"Sorry it took so long Anon, but that thing is damn heavy. Plus it kept falling off my back"
"W-What is it?"
>Right now your mind is filled with horrible thoughts of those 4chan users' piss bottles
>"It's cider."
>Oh thank god.
>"Yeah, I mixed the ingredients put it out to sit in the woods like, three months ago, and forgot about it. I only remembered when you showed me the cider you brought."
>Well, that explains a lot.
>"Yeah, three months might be too long, so who know, maybe it went bad."

>You open another cider for yourself and one for Ashas
>By the time your halfway done Ashas has finished hers and the last bottle
>"Time to see how this turned out," she says, pushing the five gallon jug towards the table
>She pours it into a large glass(miraculously not spilling it everwhere, you have no idea how she is able to maneuver such a large bottle so well without hands)
>She takes a sip and holds it in her mouth for a while. She swallows
>"Hm."
>She takes another sip and says nothing
"Is--Is it good?"
>"Surprisingly so," she answers
>"Want some BLTs?" She asks with an abruptly peppy attitude
"Sure."

>She begins gathering the components of the sandwiches
>Meanwhile you help yourself to the jug of cider
>It's pretty good
>By the time Ashas sets down a plate of BLTs on the table you have a buzz
>Damn, it's strong too
>"So, I'm guessing that since you managed to come back here you're living in Appaloosa now?"
"Yeah."
>"You liking it?"
"Oh yes. The people there are very hospitable."
>And talk continues like this for some time. You're starting to become genuinely drunk
>Your conversation is quite tame, but then. . .
>"So, Anon. We're talking, over BLTs. Are you going to tell me about what you are now, like you promised?"
>Oh shit, that's right
>You don't know if you're ready to talk about your past just yet
>You take a big gulp of cider
>Well, now is as good a time as any, you suppose
"Well, you see, I'm from a place called earth. I'm a human being"
>You stop and try to gather your thoughts on the subject
"I guess the best way to describe us humans. . ."
>Damn. You hadn't realized just how big a topic this was
>And your drunk, which doesn't make things any easier
>You take another gulp of cider
>You put your elbows on the table, lowering your head between your hands and press hard on your temples
"Ummm. . ."
>Plus you still had to explain how Earth was in an entirely seperate dimension
>Fuck
>"Earth has more humans then?"
"Uh. . . Yeah"
>"Do you miss them?"
>The question hits you hard
>"Like, did you have a family? Like wife and stuff? Do humans do that?"
"Uh. . . Yeah, humans. . . Do that"
>Your trying to keep it together
"But I was a bit too young for a wife. I had a girlfriend. . . Ex girlfriend, though."
>But you're drunk
>And it's hard
>Muscles in your throat clench
>Your eyes water
>You cover them
>And next thing you know, you're sobbing

>"God, Anon, are you okay?"
"I. . . I. . ."
>You want to say something but can't find the right words
>Right now your mind's prime directive is to cry
>Ashas has gotten up and walked to your side
>"Anon, what is it?"
"I-It's just. . . It's been a year. . . A year. . ."
>You're overtaken by a fit of especially violent sobs
>God dammit, you wish you could stop yourself
>"A year what, Anon? You can tell me"
"A year. . . Since I came here. . . To Equestria. . . A year. . . Since. . ."
>Ashas has started rubbing your back
"I saw. . . Anyone I knew, and I don't know how to get back. I might never get back!"
"Never talk to my friends, my family, never go on the computer and just fuck around all day and feel bad about it afterwards"
"Never truly be able to follow my dreams never. . . Fuck a chick again!"
>Ashas burts out laughing then, her hoof still laying on your back. You stare at her, dumbfounded
>"I-Im sorry, I know I shouldn't laugh," she says, still giggling slightly
>"It's just that you said with so much oomph behind it and the way that you. . ."
>She's now doing that snickering thing uncontrollably
>"Keekekekekkekkekk. . ."
>She has her hoof over her mouth, eyes tight shut, heaving as she tries to spare your feelings by stopping
>You notice that her outburst has shocked you out of your crying fit
>You calmly wipe your eyes and gulp down the rest of your cider, then pour more from the jug
>Ashas goes back and sits in her chair

>"So you haven't had sex since you left earth a year ago?"
"Uh. . . No, as I'm sure you've. . . Inferred, I am the only member of my species around"
>"Well why should that be a problem?"
"Excuse me?"
>"I mean, I'm sure there are PONIES around that are willing right?"
"Uh, no, I don't see how that would work. I never tried and neither has any ponies yet"
>"Well sure it would work, I mean, ponies would do it for the novelty alone"
"Novelty?"
>"Yeah! Like, they could be the ONLY one alive to EVER fuck something like you. They'd do it just to try it"
"Hm."
>You reach for your cup of cider but accidentally knock it off the table
"FUCK! Goddammit!"
>"It's okay Anon, just give me a sec."
>She gets up to go get a rag to clean it up
"Geez, I'm sorry Ashas."
>It's okay Anon, don't worry.
>She walks over to the fallen and cup puts her face, with the rag in her mouth, to the floor in order to clean the spilt cider
>You glance her way, then find your attention fixed on what you see there
>She is facing directly away from you, which means her ass is directly towards you
>Her ass which is swaying right to left, left to right as she cleans your mess
>Her tail swinging back and forth in front of her clearly displayed genitals
>It looks so perfect. . .
>The hair is slightly thinner there, making the skin show through ever so little, pink as the day she was born
>It looks so soft, you can imagine just what it feels like
>She's just two feet away, you could easily reach out and feel that pussy
>You imagine how that soft pussy would feel sopping wet
>Your mind is full of images of you pounding that delicious poon with all you've got
>Ashas stands up and turns around and smiles
>"See? No problem!" she says through the cider soaked rag
"Eh what? Oh, yeah, no problem."

>She gets a new cup and fills it with cider for you, then sits down at the table
>There was a period of silence
>You can't freaking handle this boner
>"Anyway, on the topic we were on just earlier. . ."
>"Oh hang on, your low on cider. Here, let me top you off"
>You notice she hasn't had any cider since you started crying
>But you're too drunk to think anything of it
>"Anyway, as I was saying, I think that even if you can't get back to earth, you will get laid eventually."
"I dunno, Ashas, I don't think any pony out there would be willing."
>"I would."
>You nod somberly for a moment, but then your inebriated mind processes what was just said and you your head snaps right back up
"Euh whanao?"
>Ashas gets up and walks away from the table
>"Say Anon, it's gotten dark already. Time flies huh?"
>She's walking towards her bed
>"Surely you aren't going to walk all the way back home at night?"
>She places her hooves on the bed, showing off her winking vag
>"Maybe we should have another. . . Sleepover"
>She looks back at you and winks
>Oh shit it's happening
>You stand up, fast
>It's the first time you've stood up since Ashas freaked out and pushed you to the chair
>The combination of drunkenness and a headrush that results is not very pleasant
>Damn, that floors comin' towards you awful quick. . .
>You feel your head hit, and though it doesn't hurt, you know it hit real fuckin' hard
>Your last thought before slipping into unconciousness is:
It's funny how winking is a sign of sexual invitation in both vaginas and eyes