I’m going to have to have a long talk with Screech for recommending this place when he gets back. It’s been a long four months, what with the rotting floors, leaky pipes, broken shower, and a door that seems to be out for blood. Even my roommate is being an insufferable bitch. Midnight never does her share of the chores and seems to go out of her way to pile them on me whenever she gets a chance. At least today is my own, with Midnight working a double shift I can finally knuckle down and get some real work done. 
Just as I was putting the finishing touches on the new hardwood floors, I heard the front door open followed by the clatter of heavy metal. Oh happy days. As I got up to make sure I wasn’t being robbed, I could smell the telltale aroma of armour polish and knew my luck wasn’t that good.
“Anon! What’s up with the floors?”
As I entered the living room dreading the impending conversation, I could see a look of confusion and irritation on my roomie’s face. As much as I enjoyed seeing her miffed, it never ended well for me. 
“I put in new hardwood. I was tired of the planks cracking every time I stepped on them. What’s the problem, and why aren’t you at work?”
Why did I just ask that, I must have breathed in too much of that wood polish. 
“I had my Lieutenant cover for me; he still owed me for fourth of Ju-Luau. You didn’t touch my room did you?”
Shit.
“Yeah, I was hoping to get everything done by the time you got off work. I know you’ve been working a lot of doubles lately and thought this would be a nice surprise.”
“What the hell! I’ve told you never to go in my room! And who said you could just go changing things!”
Well, the rest of the conversation was just another one of her lectures on how I was stupid and should be grateful she didn’t kick me out. I try to do nice things and this is how she responds, why even try? Once Midnight was finished berating me she retired to her room to do whatever it is she does up there. I was able to finish fitting the new pipes in the kitchen and get the shower working before dinner, so I packed up my tools for the night. I’d have to tackle the demon door another time. 
I don’t know if I subconsciously enjoy it, or if I’m just that thick, but I decided to go ask what Midnight wanted for dinner. I heard some rustling and the sound of a drawer slamming shut coming from her room as I neared her door.
 “Hey, what do you feel like eating tonight? I can make that rigatoni again; you can’t go wrong with rigatoni.”
 The door opened up just a crack, only allowing me a view of one of her eyes. It seemed to be boring into me, guess she was seeing if she had laser vision. 
“I want pizza and beer. Go get some.”
After all the hell she gave me earlier she still expects me to go out for her! Of all the nerve, thinking I’ll go out of my way just to get pizza! Sometimes I wonder what she thinks I am, a roommate or a servant.
As I stand in line at the convenience store, holding a six pack, I find myself pondering that very question. Why do I do this to myself, am I really that pathetic? Or is it that I’ll take any interaction I can get? After all, the only place I could actually find somewhere to stay was Hollow Shades. Turns out, while I may have the Princesses’ seal of approval for living in Equestria not many ponies are very willing to house a hairless ape. Fuck I hated being called that. 
Sitting in the living room, watching Midnight drop cheese and spill beer on the new floors, I wonder how it turned out this way. When I first arrived here and met her I thought she was attractive, attractive for a small pastel talking horse that is, and she seemed nice if a bit rough. I tried to be as polite as I could, even going out of my way to make sure she had lunch for work. Maybe I’m just overthinking this, she probably just needed a roommate and I was all she could get. I’d be peeved too in a situation like that. 
“Hey Midnight, do you still have todays paper?”
Her response is to idly toss it my direction. What a pal. As I flip through the pages, I notice a few ads for apartments in need of roommates, some seem pretty desperate. I grab a pen and begin circling some of the more affordable ones. I’ll have to wait a few days to follow up on these, but it will give me something to do. Afterwards, I just read the comics and finish eating before getting up to go to bed.
“Hey, Anon. Where you think you ish going?”
Great, time for the after dinner performance.
“What is it Midnight? I’m tired and need to get to bed.”
“Sshcrew that. I’m bored, play wish me!”
This mare must be out of her damn mind. 
“It’s late; you should go to bed too. You’re already going to have one hell of a hangover.”
“Nooooo. Play wish me!”
Midnight grabs my leg and is dragged along the floor as I walk to my bedroom. This is the last time I’m buying beer for her. I manage to untangle her and make it into my room without too much trouble. I can hear her make a racket for a while longer, but eventually she settles down. Not long after I find myself drifting off to sleep, hopefully a nice long one. 

No luck. I am awoken much too early in the morning to the sound of someone cooking. Or more accurately, a transformer made of pans and sheet metal cooking. Or dancing, I wasn’t sure. I dressed and made my way to the kitchen expecting a makeshift kill bot or something. What I wasn’t expecting was Midnight to be cooking breakfast, but that’s what was happening. How she managed to have almost every pot and pan we had strewn about was a mystery though. 
“What are you doing?”
She seemed a bit startled, but recovered quickly and turned around. She was wearing an apron that, admittedly, made her look adorable. 
“I’m making breakfast, what does it look like? Sit down and eat before it gets cold, I didn’t do all this for fun you know.”
I figure I may as well just accept it and eat; at least I didn’t have to cook this morning. As I sit, Midnight places a plate full of pancakes on the table. They are quite good, much to my surprise. Though I can’t help but wonder what her angle is.
“These are good; I didn’t know you knew how to cook.”
I think I spotted a blush, but there’s no way that could be, she’s probably just still feeling all that beer.
“Of course I know how to cook; I just don’t make it a habit to brag about my many talents.”
“Whatever, thanks for the breakfast. If you don’t want to clean up just soak them in the sink, I can get to them later. I’m going to try and fix the demon door, if that’s fine with you of course.”
Midnight seemed to puff up a little at this.
“Whatever, you’ve already ruined the floors, you may as well ruin the door too.”
Happy that the conversation ended there, I go pull out my tools and have a good old fashioned stare down with the front door. 
“Okay you piece of wood and hate given form, this is it. It’s gonna be you or me, and I’m feeling lucky.”
Over the next two hours, a battle of such epic proportions unfolds, that it could never be properly described. In the end, I stood triumphant over the defeated corpse of the foul demon door of Hollow Shades. I give the new door a few test swings, and I couldn’t be happier. No more using the backdoor or windows for me, no sir. As I lug my equipment back to my room, I notice that the kitchen has been cleaned. What the hell? The stars must be in alignment or something. Passing by Midnight’s door, I can hear a faint sound. Is that sobbing? No way, Midnight is a lot of things but a crier she is not. I guess she’s just reading one of those feely novels mares like to read sometimes. 
After putting up my instruments of righteous construction, I take a look around for the ads I circled. Nowhere to be found and the living room seems to have been spruced up as well. This was getting strange. Was Midnight behind this, or did we get some very helpful ghosts? Must be ghosts. Still riding the adrenaline high from my battle with the demon door, I decide to jump on the chopping block and ask Midnight if she’s seen the paper. I give her door a knock and proceed to swim with the sharks.
“Sorry to bother you, but have you seen the paper from last night?”
The door swings open to reveal a much disheveled looking Midnight.
“NO!”
Then she slams the door right in my face. I was expecting resistance, but not that. This seemed a bit much even for her.
“Hey, are you okay?”
Not bothering to open the door again, she just yells at me through it.
“FINE, GO AWAY!”
Deciding not to press my luck any further, I fuck off back to the living room. I do a crossword and try reading a book, but quickly become bored with it. I may as well get some fresh air, so I grab a jacket and head out for a walk. 
The Hollow Shades Luna memorial park was a nice quiet place for ponies to go relax. The flowers were in full bloom and all the various fruit trees gave it a nice aroma. Sitting down on a bench, I just sit and watch the ponies go by. In addition to all the bat ponies, I spot a few earth and unicorn ponies. Strange sight, but they seem to all be accompanied by a bat pony. Must be friends visiting each other. That must be nice, having friends like that. The only pony I really know is Midnight. Though I have to admit, she can be nice company when she isn’t all pissy. 
My thoughts are interrupted by two little ponies running by. Looks to be a filly chasing a colt and screaming something I can’t make out. Cute little buggers, but I seem to be the only one thinking that as they weave in and out the other ponies. I decide to just sit in silence and enjoy the rest of the day. 
I wake up sometime around dusk, still sitting on the bench. Looks like my epic battle had worn me out. I pick myself up and stretch out the kinks. On the way home I stop by the sweet shop, which was thankfully still open, and pick up some fruity tootie cupcakes. I’ve noticed every time that I get the sample box the two fruity tooties disappear before I can blink and I doubt the ghosts are behind it. Hopefully this will cheer Midnight up enough to go back to just belittling me instead of straight up yelling at me. It’s funny, the more I think on it the more I realize that I do enjoy living with her. Hell, the moments when we play cards or just chill are some of the most fun I’ve had. Still, I wish she would ease up on the cold bitch routine sometimes. 
I open up the front door, giggling on the inside as I do so, and announce my return.
“Oi, Midnight! I’m back and have brought vittles, come and get some before they disap…”
Before I can finish I’m tackled to the ground. Once the pretty birds stop chirping and fly away, I see Midnight sitting on my chest with her face buried in my chest. I am confused. 
“Hey, what’s with the linebacker imitation?”
She whispered something into my shirt that I couldn’t make out.
“I can’t hear you. It might be easier to talk if you take your face out of my clothing.”
She picks her head up and looks me in the eyes. She’s been crying, that’s a new one. She repeats what she said, but still in a low tone.
“I thought you left.”
“I did, I went for a walk. I just fell asleep on a bench in the park. No worries though, your loyal servant has returned. I brought cupcakes too, see.”
She seemed to wince as I said that, eyes moistening up.
“I saw the paper. With the ads you’d circled. I thought you left for good. I thought I chased you away.”
I thought her reaction earlier was a bit extreme, but this being the reason never crossed my mind.
“No, though I did think about it. Do you want to discuss this on the couch, or here on my chest?”
She jumps up looking mighty embarrassed, and flew over to the couch. I hand her the box of miniature frosted cakes and take a seat beside her. She takes a few small bites out of one as we sit in silence for a short while. She’s the first to break the silence.
“Thanks for these.”
“No problem. Now, what’s the deal here?”
She pauses for a moment, putting down her treat, looks like she’s composing herself.
“What are you talking about, with you gone I couldn’t afford the rent and I panicked. I just got carried away is all.”
“I don’t buy that for a second. Come on, would it kill you to let down the wall for once?”
She looks down at her hooves and sighs deep, trying to find the right words.
“It’s just; I’ve never had anyone I could really be friends with. I don’t have any friends at work, they don’t like to fraternize with a superior officer. The few other captains all have friends or family they go hang with after work. The mares I went to school with all have lives of their own, and we never talked much after graduation anyway, not that we were very close to begin with. You stayed around though, even with all the crap I gave you. You did things for me and put up with my bullshit. No pony has ever done that and I was afraid of losing you.”
To be perfectly honest, I was surprised but not as much as I could have been. I was in a similar situation to her after all. No friends, being an outcast since my arrival. Midnight had been a rock, a coarse and distant one, but one that had always been there ready for a game of cards or a board game. I put my arm around her giving her a reassuring hug. 
“It’s okay Midnight, if I didn’t enjoy your company at least some of the time I would have left long ago. I’m not going to go anywhere right now, so you can relax. Just try to ease up on me, okay? Now come on, it’s late and we both need some sleep. We can pick this up tomorrow.”
She just nods her agreement, gathers up her treats and heads to her room. I’m left sitting on the couch, exhausted. I pick up a crossword book on the table and see if I can finish one before bed. Just as I’m finishing it up, a cupcake whizzes down the hall and connects with the side of my head. Looking down the hallway, I see Midnight standing there.
“I don’t like the mango ones, get it right next time!”
I almost protest, but I catch a glimpse of a smile on her face as she ducks back into her room. I grab a towel from the kitchen and clean up the mess. It’ll take some work, to be sure, but I think this place is starting to feel like a home.