
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/12849879.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Choose_Not_To_Use_Archive_Warnings, Underage
  Category:
      M/M, Multi
  Fandom:
      Hunter_X_Hunter
  Relationship:
      Hisoka/Detergent
  Character:
      Hisoka_(Hunter_X_Hunter), Gon_Freecs, Gain
  Additional Tags:
      late_night_at_a_laundromat, detergent, lots_of_soap, Rough_Sex, Crack,
      Crack_Treated_Seriously, Hisoka_fucks_the_soap, Gon_is_there_so_we're
      gonna_tag_it_as_underage, and_that_detergent_can't_be_older_than_3,
      Laundry_sauce
  Series:
      Part 1 of Hunter_x_Hell
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-11-28 Chapters: 2/2 Words: 2450
****** Laundry ******
by ContrivedCircus, ninagoofas1
Summary
     Gon happens upon Hisoka in the middle of the night---what could go
     wrong?
Notes
See the end of the work for notes
***** Chapter 1 *****
 
 
 
It’s 02:47 when Gon leaves the apartment to do some last-minute laundry at the
24-hour place up his street. He didn’t want Killua to know he’d forgotten to
wash his clothes again, so he’d decided to sneak out as quietly as possible,
stank Glad™ bag of soiled unmentionables in tow.
He expects the laundromat to be empty; it’s the middle of the night after all.
What he doesn’t expect, when he walks through the automatic doors of the white-
tile establishment, is to see an oddly familiar magician leaned against one of
the running machines. There’s a flickering light directly above his machine,
making him stand out in his casual, colorful attire among the silver and white.
Raising an eyebrow, the teen considers leaving, his grip on his Glad bag
tightening as he contemplates his options.
However, Hisoka had already noticed the boy’s presence, his gaze turning from
the bottle of detergent atop the washer, to Gon standing in the doorway.

“Ah~? Shouldn’t good little kids be in bed by now~?♣”
“What are you doing here?” demands Gonter, pointing a finger at Hisoka.
“...Isn’t it obvious? I’m,” an unsettling smile curls his lips, “getting clean,
is all. Don’t you have your own panties to wash? I’m a bit too pre-occupied to
tend to you, little one. Another time~.”

Frowning, Gon continues his venture inside, picking out a machine several feet
away from Hisoka, despite it being far larger than him. He can hear the dim
buzz of electricity from the dying light, it’s the only noise. Something about
Hisoka’s attitude is suspicious; why would he be at a laundromat at this time
of night? Based on their past encounters, wouldn’t Hisoka spend a bit more time
on his greeting? Gon wonders what could be so interesting in a laundromat at
2am. Chancing a look back at him, nerves curdled at the sight of Hisoka staring
at the rinse cycle, then uncapping his detergent—with movements and a gaze that
can only perfectly be described as lust—it rubbed Gon in all the wrong ways and
he turned back to his own laundry.

Unbeknownst to the little Hunter, Hisoka wasn’t about to start a new load of
laundry. Gon hadn’t even stopped to consider that the creepy magician man—who
doesn’t hand out candy in a windowless, white van so is a little less
creepy—didn’t appear to have any dirty clothes with him. In-fact, all Hisoka
appeared to have were the clothes on his body and the bottle of detergent.

Across the laundromat, Hisoka poured the thick detergent into the cap, filling
it until it was nearly overflowing before gently tipping the large bottle
upright again. His gaze never seemed to stray from the smooth, syrupy, blue
liquid as the stream thinned before turning into a drip. The way he looked at
the detergent was unsettling to say the least, but it wasn’t the creepiest
thing Hisoka could be doing.
Gon had faint memories of a time during the Hunter Exam when he had overheard
Hisoka and Gittarackur in their hotel room. Both him and Killua had just
returned from the vending machine where they had overloaded their arms with
candy bars and soda. As they passed the door to Hisoka and Gittarackur’s room,
the voluminous sloughs of Hisoka’s voice had caught their attention. Pausing,
the two exchanged a glance, jumping when a far louder cry caught them off
guard.
“Ahhnn, Deeper~! Use the ice cream!”

The memory caused the teen to shudder, he hadn’t wanted to know what was
happening then , and he didn’t want to know what was happening now .

With the bottle now upright, Hisoka leans on his elbows, dipping one finger
into the blue liquid before gently stirring it around. Beneath him, the washer
loudly hummed and vibrated, the perfect conditions for his latest interest.

‘Oh~...’ Hisoka moans internally.

Pressing his hardening length against the vibrating washing machine, a lustful
blush crosses his face as he dips his finger in deeper. The detergent would
feel better if it were warm, but he hadn’t yet figured out the best way to warm
it without destroying the thick, slippery properties. If only he had discovered
this before making his aura into bungee gum.
He removes his coated finger, bringing it up close to his nose. Inhaling
deeply, the jester lets out a deep, satisfied sigh. All the while, Gon stares
back at the scene, mouthing a silent: ‘What the fuck’.
He shakes himself off, attributing Hisoka’s behavior to simply who he is, and
decides the sooner his clothes are washed, the sooner he can get the hell out
of here. Gonter throws open the doors of two or three washers, tossing his
laundry in and only then realizing that he did not bring any detergent. With
only enough change on him to pay for the cycles, the teen casts a wary glance
in Hisoka’s direction before looking away again. Uh-oh.
Peeking back at Hisoka, who is still enraptured with his detergent, Gon clears
his throat, “Hey Hisoka,” he looks up, seemingly disturbed from his business,
“I was wondering if I could borrow some soap? I forgot to bring some, you see,
heh…”
“I’d love to help you out, but I’m afraid my detergent isn’t any good~♠.”

There’s a brief pause, near silence overtaking the small establishment as
Hisoka stares hard at Gon.

“Now then...”
Returning his attention to the bottle before him, he continues sniffing his
detergent coated finger, a quiet moan audible over the low hum of the washers.
It’s as if Gon hadn’t asked at all. Understandably taken aback, he does nothing
but stare in shock for a few quiet seconds. Hisoka’s composure had never been
so visibly disrupted before, Gonter finds himself at a loss for words. How is
he supposed to wash his clothes now?

Glancing around the room, he spots a wall mounted vending-thingy with rows of
detergent available inside. Counting his money, he decides to only wash two of
his three loads, he’ll both have soap and get out of here faster.
Taking his clothes out of one of the washers, he shoves them back into his
Glad™ bag, giving another hesitant, disturbed glance in Hisoka’s direction
before approaching the machine. After counting out the appropriate amount of
change, he retrieves his detergent packets, carrying them back to the machine.

Still situated against the warm, vibrating washing machine, Hisoka continues to
swirl his finger in the detergent filled cap. His mind wanders, oblivious now
to Gon’s movements. It doesn’t matter what the kid is doing. Previously, he’d
found Gon to be as appealing as lemonade on a hot Summer day, but after
discovering the absolutely delightful texture of detergent against his sordid
skin, he’d changed sexualities. What could be better than this? Before tonight,
Hisoka could only imagine what it might have felt like wrapped around his
erection, soapy and thick... He had never felt anything quite this pleasing.

Soughing in ecstasy, Hisoka dips in a second finger, enthralled in this simple
activity. From across the laundromat, Gon sets up both washers, trying hard not
to look at Hisoka, though his eyes wander from time-to-time.
“What is he doing…” Gon doesn’t want to know, something tells him he’s walked
in on something no mortal was ever meant to see.
‘I’m going to have nightmares for weeks…’
He tries to ignore the inappropriate noises coming from behind him with
embarrassed acquiescence as he taps his foot impatiently. He’d only just
started the washers which meant that 20 more minutes remained in the wash
cycle. 20 more minutes of Hisoka’s impassioned moaning to the tune of running
washers. In an attempt to distract himself, Gon begins to fold up the now empty
packet, his eyes and mind focusing hard on the task until the packet is too
small (and tight, and wet, and so-so sexy) to be folded any further. Walking it
to the trash can furthest from Hisoka, he drops it into the empty container,
lingering  longer than necessary. He didn’t want to return to his washers which
were too close to Hisoka. Why couldn’t the laundromat be larger? Gon wanted to
be as far away from the perverted clown as he could. After a few minutes of his
uncomfortable lingering near the trash can, Gon reluctantly located a seat near
the two washers he had running, doing his best to avoid looking at Hisoka.

Kicking his feet, he stares at his lap, the laundromat now louder with the
sound of three running washers and Hisoka’s moans. Gon can’t help wishing
Killua had come along. He shouldn’t have waited to do his laundry and he
definitely shouldn’t have waited until 2AM. In an attempt to distract himself
from the increasing onslaught of Hisoka’s moans, Gon pulls out his phone,
desperately hoping Candy Crush (lmao) can save him.

Across the rather small laundromat, Hisoka begins to consider indulging in his
desires. He’d mostly forgotten about the little Hunter’s presence, it wasn’t
relevant, nor did he particularly care what Gon did. What is far more
interesting at the moment is the detergent against his skin that is blissfully
selcouth, truly encapturing his full attention and dominating his thoughts. Gon
could be chewing off his finger, it didn’t matter, those fingers would no
longer be touching him in his fantasies, one fewer would change nothing.

Reaching down with his clean hand, Hisoka fumbles with his sweatpants, tugging
them down just enough to expose himself. The cap wasn’t deep enough for him to
truly enjoy himself, but it would allow him a taste. Enough to hold him over
until his clothes finished washing.
Voyeurs be damned. Hisoka is at the end of what could never possibly be called
resistance. With a loud, heated groan, he delves his dick into the shallow cap
of liquid ecstasy.
“Hahhh~♥”
Gonald swivels around to catch Hisoka dipping his obvious erection into his
laundry soap. A furious blush spreads across his shocked features. Maybe
Killua’s wrath won’t be as punishing as this sight is...
He turns back around, ashamed and frightened. This might be worse than that day
in the wetlands when he first opposed Hisoka. No. It’s absolutely worse. How is
he supposed to sit here quietly and pretend that this isn’t happening? Should
he say something? No, this is still Hisoka he’s dealing with. Whether or not he
has his penis half-soaked in detergent, he shouldn’t question him too much.

The jester, dipping his swollen length into the liquid, shudders as he takes in
the sensation. It’s cold, but it feels good, he could cum if he wasn’t hold
back. Biting his lip to quiet his moans, Hisoka swirls his cock in the
detergent. There was a slight burn in his urethra, but nothing that didn’t
serve to arouse him further. This was better than when Illumi and him tried
sounding, truly, nothing compared to this feeling or the smell. Picking up his
pace a bit, the magician holds the cap steady, thrusting into it as much as he
can, allowing louder moans to replace his sighs.

Gon, still stuck in his chair, clenches his teeth to prevent himself from
sprinting out of the laundromat. He can’t leave his clothes here, but he also
doesn’t want to be outside while he waits for them to finish. He doesn’t want
to think about what Hisoka would do with his clothes if he leaves them here.
The moans reach his ears all too quickly, surrounding him as his thoughts begin
to race. This isn’t what he expected when he set out to do his laundry. Why is
Hisoka here anyway? Their suites in Heaven’s Arena came equipped with washers
and dryers, does that mean he wants to be seen? This isn’t something he wants
to put much thought into… Hisoka’s kinks are not an interest of his…

The cap banged against the side of the washing machine with each short thrust.
Hisoka’s breathing is heavier now, eyes half-lidded as he falls thick into the
feeling of the detergent. Closing his eyes, he lowers his head, imagining
himself fucking the whole bottle, surrounded by smaller bottles.
The mental image is enough to push the jester over the edge, his voice
unrestricted as he loudly moans with his finish.
Squeezing his eyes closed, Gon pulls his shoulders up as he tries to drown out
the awful sound. He’s definitely going to have nightmares after this, and he
can’t even tell Killua about what he’s seen…

Hearing the beep of his washer cycle ending, Gonathan leaps from his chair,
tearing the doors clean off the machines as he quickly pulls his still wet
clothes out, shoving them into his Glad™ bag before running from the
laundromat. He’ll never be able to look at Hisoka, or detergent, the same.
 
 
***** Author's Notes *****


Huge thanks to our amazing beta reader, Lost. We would've been in a larger mess
without them!


While NinaGoofas1 and I were writing, we would talk 'at' each other on the
google doc itself. This is a snippet of some of those conversations.
 
GET YOOUR OWN FUCKKING GODDAMN DETERGENT THIS IS MY DICK JUICE RIGHT HERE I
THINK WALGREENS OPEN LIL RINGO-CHAN APPLE LOOKIN HOE WHY DONT YOU FREELOAD OVER
THERe?!”
All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places
Worn out faces
Bright and early for
The morning races
Going NOWHEREE
GONALD NOWEHRE
And i find it kinda funny
I find it kinda sad
THAT HISOKA’S SCHWING
IS THE BEST I’VE EVER HAD♣
Mad world
Lmfao♣
We’re all Hisoka now♣
Oh shit bitch♣(hisoka)
Imagine hisoka cursing
“Godfuckingshitdick, Illu… We talked about this… You have to stop digging
orifices in our carpet, I’ve had it replaced four times this month. You’re
paying for it this time, and I’m moving.”
Wait. what if. Instead of other words the word for anus in smut is always
orifice. Hisoka uses the word in his regular speech. YES ANY WORD FOR HOLE YESS
‘How was your orifice last night?”
“My what”
“Your sleeping orifice.”
“W-what the fuck specifically”
“Are you shy about it~?♣”
“My sleeping….my beeping..sleeping..my sash-ringing….my bash-
pinging...flinging….”
Lmaoooo do u kno where this is from????? Omg brb
I have no clue not the slightest, an orifice?
I didn’t link it to her, no. I thought we should finish it a little more first.
Let me get Hisoka to cum then...
Yes i agree…..Hisoka should come...Gon should run out in regret…...
I’m fuckin dyin’ dude. I love this
Same
Honey,_you’ve_got_a_big_storm_comin’.
 
Hi welcome to my first fanfic uwu please like and review and maybe ther will be
more lemons
XD Hisoka runs depressedly.
No need to edit that






End Notes
     i personally apologize
Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed
their work!
