It’s been a couple weeks since I changed my whole look and I still love it. I haven’t felt this happy in a long time, like I’ve finally discovered a piece of me I’ve so desperately needed. Every day I wake up and look at myself in the mirror with a delighted smile that just won’t fade. Anon has certainly taken to my new look, not that he ever seemed sad with how I looked before. Nowadays when we go for walks, he stands a little straighter with a grin on his face, proud of his ptero girlfriend being more like herself than she has ever allowed herself to be before.

Trish has been recovering nicely from her ordeal. Her hair is already starting to tuft up again, though it’ll be some time before she can do anything with it. It’s just a soft pile of stubble on top of her head. Her cuts have been healing, very few leaving any evidence they were ever there, and her polished horns are positively gleaming. We’ve been spending time chatting about what to do with the band. The more I talk about it, the more certain I am that I’m making the choice for myself. She’s not trying to take control, not trying to force me to be anything she wants me to be. It’s the kind of support I used to get from her so long ago, and it’s nice to have it back.

Anon and I are sitting in the park, enjoying each other’s company. When the sun reaches from above and tries to bake us in our skin, we hide in a gazebo. The heat waves rising from the concrete reveal the intensity of the temp as summer starts to rear its vicious head. Three fucking months of this garbage is never fun, but I’ll never leave Volcaldera, it’s my home and always will be. I wipe some sweat from my brow while Anon fans himself with his shirt as he melts in the heat.

I smirk at him with a little chuckle. “Dying over there, dweeb?”

“Fuck the sun and everything about it. How the fuck do you survive this shit?” He snags a tiny leaf from the table, futilely attempting to give himself relief.

I shrug. “The benefits of being a dino, I guess. We regulate our temps a little bit better in the summer. Though fuck winter…chills me right to the fucking bone.”

He grins proudly. “The one thing we humans got over you dinos. Superior winter protection!”

I roll my eyes at him before looking back with a devious smile on my beak. “You do know that means I’m just going to steal all your warmth, right?”

He doesn’t stop smiling as he winks. “And why is that a bad thing for me? You gotta keep close to keep warm? Lord Raptor Jesus, save me from the enforced cuddles, how will I ever survive?” He places the back of his palm on his forehead as he pretends to faint and I kick him in the shin. “Ow! Goddamn, even without steel plates those boots hurt.”

“Dork.” I snicker as I shake my head. He rubs his shin in mock agony and I roll my eyes again. The street performers are out in force today. They are hiding in whatever scarce shade the day provides as they ply their trades. The living statue hiding by the fountain has his work cut out for him as he struggles to maintain composure under the unrelenting sun. I watch as some kindhearted little ptero girl puts an umbrella behind him before giving him the most adorable smile and skipping away. It’s the little things that matter, those tiny kindnesses that can change a whole day for the better.

I catch sight of that same deinonychus girl from my days at the hospital. She still looks as happy as the day I saw her then, playing her guitar as she sings lyrics to songs I’ve never heard while passersby toss coins and spare bills into her open guitar case. The more I watch her, the more I think about what I want out of my life. I don’t want to spend my time behind a desk or slaving away for someone else’s dreams. I want to be me…I want to play my music for the small crowds around town. I think…I think it’s all I’ve ever wanted out of life. Something simple but beautiful, just like her.

“I’ll be back in a sec, Anon.” He nods and flicks through his phone, still desperately trying to cool down as I walk over to the girl. She’s still in her own world, her fingers gently gliding across the strings of her guitar as she softly sings to whomever will listen. I stand there and close my eyes as I allow her song to take me wherever it wants. The soft welcoming tone, singing of easier times ahead and beautiful tomorrows as each word effortlessly flows from her while she plays. As she finishes the song, I’m almost in tears but I smile, reaching into my pocket and tossing a few spare dollars I had into her case.

She rests her hands across her guitar as she looks up at me with a welcoming smile. “Thank you, miss. If you don’t mind me asking, what do you play?”

The question catches me off guard; it’s not like I’m hanging a sign around my neck saying I play instruments or anything. She sees my confusion and chuckles. “It’s the way you carry yourself and how you reacted to my song. I watched your fingers move as you listened. You were matching my movements even if you weren’t aware of it. I would guess guitarist, but I didn’t want to make any assumptions.”

“Yeah. I mean…yeah, I play guitar. I play bass and piano too, but my favorite is definitely guitar. It just sings to me, you know?”

She nods knowingly with a smile as she begins to softly pluck at the guitar again before she speaks. “Multi-talented, huh? Impressive. But yeah, I get you. Not a day goes by that I don’t play my guitar.” She punctuates that with a few strums of her guitar as she prepares to go into another song. “It keeps me going and it’s all I want out of life. I’m not making a ton of money playing on the street, but I don’t need much. I live alone…long since lost my family, so this is how I cope.” A melancholy tone starts to flow from her guitar as her smile curls down into a soft frown. “It keeps them close, right in my heart.” She taps her chest twice with her guitar as she continues to play.

“I’m sorry to hear that. You play beautifully. I saw you once when I was recovering in the hospital…you gave me a lot to think about.”

Her frown shrinks a bit as she looks up at me. “Oh? I hope you’ve healed well.”

I nod to her as I sit down across from her. “Yeah, like it never happened…at least physically.” I catch her ruby-colored eyes focusing on me as I speak. “I just…no…I shouldn’t drop my problems on someone I don’t even know.”

She stops playing, reaching out and placing her hand on my knee. “Miss, you say whatever you need to say. I’ve been through a lot of pain myself. It’s not good to bottle it up, so go ahead.”

I take a deep breath as I try to organize my thoughts—what can I even say? I don’t know…but I don’t think anyone else could understand better than someone like her. I sigh warily, drooping over my legs as I hold myself up by my elbows. “I don’t want to do what they want me to. I don’t want to go to college, I don’t want to get a job that’ll suck the fucking soul out of me…I just want to play my music, like you.” A tear streaks down my face and I flick it away. “I nearly killed myself because I became so lost in everyone else’s dreams that I didn’t know what mine were anymore. I’m scared I’ll waste my life, doing some job I think makes me happy until I’m fucking seventy then realize I never lived a day in my life.”

“Is that why you were in the hospital?” I nod to her and she sighs, giving me a sympathetic pat on my knee. “I understand what you are saying, though.” She starts to play again, the same melancholic tone filling the air around us. “You are young, you still have so many years ahead of you, but you have only one chance to be true to yourself. If you want to play music for a living, why not? A young girl like you could rock this town if she wanted to. Do you have a band or anything?”

I nod. “Yeah…my boyfriend plays bass and our friend plays drums. We played one show at a restaurant and people loved it. I felt so happy that day, like my life meant something.”

“Then it sounds like you know exactly what you want to do. Maybe college wouldn’t be right for you, maybe it would…but if you are so sure, tell them. Be honest and explain yourself. I can tell you from experience”—she smiles softly as her eyes shimmer in the sunlight—“playing music with the one you love is something you’ll never regret. Trust me.”

Through her eyes, I can see the truth in her words. The pain she hides behind a simple smile, the knowledge of years spent being who she is granting wisdom you can’t get without experience. She’s lived her life exactly as she wanted to, not a single regret to be found in her gaze. She’s right…I need to decide if this is what I want. I peer over at Anon, who is still tapping away at his phone. Spend years playing music with him until we are old and gray? I can’t see a better way to live my life after everything we’ve been through together.

She catches me looking at him and smiles. “Go on, girl. Go live your best life, you only get one. Don’t waste it, don’t let it go. Love with all of your heart and never settle for less than what you want out of life.”

“Thank you so much. What’s your name?” I ask as I reach my hand out to her.

She reaches out and shakes mine gently. “Sasha, yours?”

I smile at her. “Fang.”

“A pleasure to meet you, Fang. I hope you stop by again sometime,” she says as I stand back up and dust off my pants, returning to strum away at her guitar with a more pleasant ethereal tone.

I rub my eyes as I nod at her. “Happy to meet you too, Sasha. I’d be happy to.” She smiles and waves at me as I toss another small handful of bills into her case and head back over to Anon. He’s still swiping on his phone but he glances over top of it as I sit down beside him. He quickly puts his phone away and pulls me in close.

“How’d it go? You were gone for a little longer than I expected.”

A soft smile hangs on my beak. “It…it was good. Got some advice I didn’t expect to get. Something to mull over. Did you want to head home? Be nice to stop baking in the sun, plus I’m getting pretty hungry. Figure by the time we get back, Mom will have dinner ready.”

“Sure thing, Fang. Could use a snack that isn’t a box of sawdust chili cheese fries, anyhow.” He gags as he thumbs toward the cart behind us. Not sure how the hell she makes money with Tracy right close by…those hotdogs are to die for. Hmm…no, I’ll snag a chili dog later. I don’t want to spoil my dinner.

We hop off the bench as I take his hand in mine. Baking sun or not, I’m still getting my handholding in. Thankfully the closer it gets to the evening, the less it’s trying to roast my scales off as we round the corner to our neighborhood. Though, to be honest, I can’t wait till we move out together. It’s been nice living with him in my parents’ house, but I really would prefer it to be just us for a while. It’d be good to have something more than quietly hiding away in my room every night. As we walk up the steps, the smells of mom’s cooking are already sneaking into my nostrils and the delicious aroma instantly makes my stomach gurgle in delight.

Anon pops open the door and we get out of the baking heat. “Oh, thank Raptor Jesus for A/C,” I say as I stretch, flapping my wings and probably sending sweat everywhere around me. Yep, definitely did as I see Anon wipe his face off with a groan. I laugh. “Sorry, dweeb. Kinda forgot to warn you.”

“It’s alright. Just got a second shower I wasn’t expecting to have today.” He grabs a rag off the table and wipes himself down before tossing it into a hamper.

“Welcome home, dears!” My mom’s cheery voice calls out to us from the kitchen. “Dinner’s going to be done in just a few minutes. Why don’t you join the rest of the family at the table?”

“Okay, Mom!” I call back to her as we head into the dining room. Naser is idly spinning his fork in his fingers while my dad checks the local newspaper. One day he’ll just get a phone instead of messing around with that hulk of paper. Anon and I take seats near Naser who snaps out of his focus, catapulting his fork across the room and earning a glare from our dad. He sheepishly chuckles before quickly picking it up and sitting back down.

“Hey, you two, have fun at the park?” Naser asks as he puts the fork back down on the table, probably out of fear of getting his crest whacked by Dad.

“Yeah, we did,” Anon says before I do. “Other than the sun trying to murder me, it was pretty nice date.”

Naser looks over to Dad, who doesn’t even react anymore to us being so open about our relationship. A far cry from when he wanted to beat Anon to death for even daring to be near me. He shrugs and turns back to us. “Well, glad to hear it.” His eyes light up as she smirks. “Oh! And I got accepted at medical college. Not that there was any doubt, I just hadn’t formally been accepted before. My grades and extracurriculars easily nailed me a scholarship. I’ll be going in a couple of months for four years, but then I’ll be back here. Plenty of hospitals around here that could use more doctors.”

I smile at him, even though it pains me to think of him being gone. He’s been such a help to me since my incident. Honestly, without him and Anon, I don’t know how well I would have done. I shove the thought from my head as I clap for him. “Awesome, Naser! I mean, yeah, there wasn’t a chance you weren’t going to go but it’s still nice to have it be official.” I sigh, not entirely able to hide my disappointment. “I’m going to miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too, sis.” His smile sags as he looks at me. “Honestly, I don’t want to leave but I’ve worked too hard to just let this slip by. Plus, probably good one of us be medically trained with how accident prone your boyfriend is.”

“Hey!” Anon attempts to protest before thinking for a minute and sighing in defeat. “Okay…yeah, you are right. Stupid gravity.”

Naser chuckles at Anon, sighing as he leans back into his chair. Dad still says nothing, too focused on the news, but a few moments later my mom comes out carrying all sorts of dishes and sets them on the table. I watch as she slowly unveils the feast before us. Perfectly cooked steaks with fresh mushrooms beside them, a heaping bowl of garlic butter mashed potatoes, and a side of brown gravy. She takes her seat at the head of the table as we as always await her permission. She nods her head once and we all pile our plates high.

For once, I’m a little more reserved as I grab myself a modest stack of food, a couple of steaks and some mushrooms with a little pile of potatoes. The rest don’t notice, too absorbed in their frenzy her cooking always puts the family into. I poke at my steak as I cut it into little cubes that I pile into the potatoes. It makes for an easy and delicious combo as I chew away at my mom’s always perfect cooking. The thoughts of college find their way to the front of my mind again. Do I really want to skip out of it entirely? I’m not sure. I just don’t see how it could help me with my plan to play music. I’m already great at it…what else do I need?

I look between my parents as they both calmly enjoy their meals. Naser and Anon are basically animals as they slurp down an insane amount of steak, like they are competing with each other. Wait…they actually are. I catch them staring at each other with every bite. Fucking dorks…anyway, no time like the present to be honest.

“Guys…” I speak softly but somehow it catches the attention of the entire table and they look over at me, waiting. Fucking hell…I really hope I don’t catch too much shit for this. I sigh heavily as I set my fork down. “I…I don’t really want to go to college.”

My mom sets her utensils down and a small chunk of steak falls out of Naser’s beak as he stares at me. My dad’s eyebrow is raised as he leans on the table to look at me. Anon doesn’t seem surprised; hell, he looks like he was expecting this. “Are you sure about that, Fang?” My dad asks as his steely gaze locks on me. No aggression in it, but I can tell he’s reading me like a book.

“I…yeah, I am. I don’t want to just work some job for the rest of my life. I just want to play music. I’ve already got shows lined up with Uncle Moe and with a little work, I can easily go around town finding places to play that’ll pay well.” My dad’s gaze never falters while I speak and my mom simply listens to me with no judgment in her eyes. “I don’t want to waste my life…I already almost lost it. That day at Moe’s, the song at graduation…” Tears mist in my eyes as my lip quivers. “I never felt more alive then, not any other time my entire life. This is my calling, I know it.”

The silence is almost deafening as my eyes drift across the table. Naser has recovered from his stupor and is silently nodding, his eyes speaking a thousand words. My mom doesn’t do anything except look over to Dad, waiting to see his response. He tents his fingers in front of his face as he sighs.

“Fang, I know you don’t see college as being helpful in all of this, but I can promise you, it will be.”

“How, Dad?” I huff in exasperation. “How will it help anyone but everyone else who wants me to be something I’m not? All college would lead to is a job I don’t want in some freaking office building, locked away for the rest of my life. I don’t want that. I won’t do it.” I grit my teeth, fighting back any urge to yell as I lock eyes with him.

He doesn’t raise his voice as he continues, “I’m not asking you to get a degree in something you’d hate. I’m saying there are plenty of business classes that can help you manage your money and make sure no one screws you on payment for your shows.” My jaw drops. What the hell? He actually wants to help with this? “Your mother and I are already going to pay for it. All I ask is that you try it. A few years spent there could make sure no one pays you less than you deserve, and would give you the skills to manage every aspect of your band.”

My mom nods to him before turning toward me with a smile. “Exactly, honey. We won’t ask you to be something you are not. We just want to make sure you’ll have all the tools to succeed however you wish to live your life. I don’t want anyone taking advantage of my baby girl’s dreams and cutting her short on payment!” she says with a stern frown.

“Plus,” my dad continues. “It’ll also help you keep track of equipment and costs. Make sure you aren’t going over budget and such things.” He lets his arms rest on the table as he smiles at me. “I’d never force you to do this, Fang, but I want you to consider it. A little education behind your dream and I can easily see you living off the money even with a family.”

A family? I’ve never really given that idea much thought…not that I’m against it. I just hope I get to play around town a little bit before a kid somehow enters the picture. Still, I’m shellshocked. I didn’t expect any of this. I guess they have a point. A little skill in business could do me some good if I really want to make money off this. Plus, all my shows will be at night anyway, so I can easily stick a few classes in there without screwing up my plan. I just hope this is where it ends and they don’t try to push me into some hole. I’ll never let someone ever do that to me again.

“Okay, guys…I’ll give it a try.” Any tension in the air dissipates as my parents nod. I’m still not sure but…I don’t want to talk about it anymore right now.

“Glad to hear it, dear. Now, please, eat up.” My mom motions to my plate as I start shoveling potatoes into my beak. Holy crap, her cooking is delicious…one thing I’m definitely going to miss when I move out. She smiles while she watches me chow down as she carefully eats her steak. Naser and Anon continue to compete with each other before my dad finally reaches over to the last of the food, snatching it up before they can, leaving them forever locked in a stalemate much to their despair.

“Dangit…I’ll get you next time, Naser,” Anon grunts as he finishes clearing off his plate.

“Anytime, anywhere, Anon. The best you can ever hope for is a draw against me anyway.” Naser smugly grins as he taps a napkin to his beak.

“Dorks.” I roll my eyes at the both of them while I finish off my plate. I clean off my face before getting up, motioning for Anon to follow. I walk over to my mom, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks for dinner, Mom.”

She smiles warmly as she pats my hand. “You are welcome, dear.” Anon and I head upstairs to my room where I push the door open and fall on my bed. I’m still not sure about this. I’m scared they’ll just try to rope me into something else, just like Trish did for so long, trying to force her ideas onto the band. I cover my face with my hands as I drag them down it with a groan. This better not be a waste of my time.

Anon plops down beside me, landing on his side as he props his head up with one arm. “You sure about college, Fang?”

“No.” I sigh. “But as much as they say they wouldn’t mind, I know they’d be upset if I didn’t go at all. All I want is to play music with you across town. Is that too much to hope for? Am I just dreaming like an idiot unwilling to deal with reality?”

Tears start to swell in my eyes and he pulls me into a hug. “It’s not. Not even a little, Fang.” I bury my face into his shirt. “I mean, I’m still going to college but it’s to help with the band, too.” I gasp as I pull back to look into his eyes. “Yeah, gonna take some music courses and composing. Figure I should help out too as best I can and to be honest, this music stuff has been the most fun I’ve had in my life.” He gives me a kiss on the snout. “We’ll live this dream together, Fang. As boring as college might be, it’ll still help us kill it on the streets of Volcaldera.”

“You mean it?” A shaky smile forms on my lips as I peer into his comforting eyes.

“Course I do, Fang.” He smirks and kisses my snout again. My lips purse as I glare at him and he chuckles. “Sorry. But yeah, I love the idea of us just getting by on shows around town. Honestly can’t think of a better way to spend our lives together. Certainly would be a lot more fun than any other job we could end up at.”

I bury my face into his shirt again as my wing drapes across the both of us. “Thank you, Anon…I’m glad you are with me on this.” I sigh happily as I hold him tight. “You, me, and Reed. We’ll play across town and no one will ever forget us.”

“Nope, they definitely won’t. We’ll live a life without regrets.”

I softly smile, the weight of the world pulled from my shoulders as I imagine our future together. Even if Reed someday moves on, the two of us easily could continue to play shows. Plenty of work around here for hungry musicians and I can bet there are plenty from our graduating class that would love to hear us play again. It’s going to be a lot of work, but it’s work I can see myself loving to do for the rest of my life. We talk back and forth in bed, planning out our future and how to balance classes, shows, and sleep. In a couple of weeks, we’ll be moving into our own place and then we don’t need to worry about keeping everyone up while practicing.

The last hours of the day pass as we snuggle under the blankets. It’s nice to hope again. Being able to see a future in front of me that is possible. To live our dream, together.