Odd how time flies at volcano high. Doesn't help that My dopamine receptors have been so utterly fried that time itself has become a real, tangible object that I can watch deteriorate while I stare at the wall high as a kite. My impulse control has been absent  recently and I’m not sure why…

 

…I lied, I know why, it's the whole beach incident. The embarrassment, the guilt, the anger, all the emotions I felt after I woke up face first in the sand drove me almost insane. I had to find an outlet. I reached out to Reed, as hopeless as things where. I realized almost instantly that was a bad idea, seeing as how I handled Trish and Fang, but he was pretty cool considering. I was just honest with the guy, I called the love of my life a failure of a faggot in a selfish, drunken state and to my surprise he wasn't completely furious at me.

 

Still mad because... Yeah. Despite that he talked me off the ledge. Kept me straight and narrow with his stoner wisdom. But despite our talks I'm still not over my first romance. In fact, weeks later, I'm still fucked up. My biggest problem is that I didn't really have time to grieve. School couldn't be dropped as a priority because I was too fucked in the head to even think about joining the military. I struggled through to the end keeping my head down along the way. Pretty much on my own at that point, I had to focus up on cheating my way through finals. I got pretty good at deceit too, I guess that says more about me than anything else.

 

Immediately after graduation, I got a job. I had to do the unthinkable and actually not turn into a NEET. Despite the rapidly growing mental illness inside my brain, I convinced a WacDonnlds to hire me. Sadly part-time was off the table so I became a full time wage cuck. On the plus side I had money to blow, and blow I did. Surrounding myself with only the finest frozen dinners I could buy and spending all my valuable free time doing what I always did; talking about vidja games I've never played with Albanian Coin Collectors. 

 

...yeah this wasn't working, I fucking wanna kill myself. I wanna splatter all over a highway, I wanna take a long walk off a short cliff, I wanna slit my wrists and write gay poetry with my own blood. I wanna suck start a Shotgun. New and exciting ways to off myself flashed in my head every hour or so, some inspired by the replies I would get on my threads. Every shitty teammate in whatever online game I would play would tell me to go take a bath with a toaster, and I would take it as words of gratitude rather than spite. Like hell yeah I wanna die, why else would I be playing the newest Squawk of Duty game? To have fun? No it's active encouragement to just fucking actually do it this time. 

 

My mind can only go back and forth between just the most horrendous ways to die and how badly I fucked up with Fang. I couldn't decide if it was entirely my fault or if it was an equal effort thing. Some days I fucking hated that stupid sliver bitch, fucking tumbler obsessed cunt. She's incompatible with anyone, in any situation. All she does is push and provoke others, desperate to be unhappy. The only times when I truly loved her is when she was weak, when she showed me how much she was hurting, but she couldn't, or more so wouldn't, tell me how she felt. All I kept seeing was her selfish side, and I just couldn't fucking take it anymore. I was frustrated, it all came out with liquid courage. I was mad at her for quitting music the most. The word faggot was just the first slur that came to mind but in reality I think I was just fed up with her losing passion and hiding who she really was.

 

A talented soul, someone who loves music more than stupid overly online gender shit. All my well defined thoughts and opinions came out as 'faggot' when Fang needed me the most...

 

It's my fault. It's my fault I think to myself as I remain hunched over my computer, the glow of the monitor burning hateful pixels into my eyes, forever clouding my periphery. Another few hours of my life wasted as whatever vidja ost played through my headphones. I stare for a few more minutes before I grab the kitchen knife I had laying on my desk and carved another notch from the wood. I’m not sure when I picked up this habit, but it’s a good alternative to… whatever else I could think of doing to myself.

 

Everything in my life gets mixed up in a haze of brain fog. Time flies when you're wasting away. A full year from the event and I couldn't get over shit. It took my phone beeping at me to wake me up from another session of staring at the wall. Surprisingly, it was Reed. It had been a few weeks since he last texted me. I assumed he wanted to cut ties with the walking dead.

 

"Yo, I may need a +1. Going to a house party, need to mingle for business reasons, and as long as you stay on your best behavior, I want you there."

 

Raptor Jesus, he wants me to go outside. He wants me to go to a party, even. Dinos I guess can go significantly harder than humans when it comes to drinking, drugs…

 

 

That's how it started. Reed introduced me to a brand new scene that I flocked too immediately. He was serious about the business thing though, surprisingly it had nothing to do with drugs. Turns out Reed is a tech bro. Cryptocurrency, apps, net-zones, the whole ten yards. I'm kidding of course, but I can't take him seriously when he tells me about it. I'm no stranger to new and exciting advancements but coming outta' his maw… it's hard to take seriously. 

 

After graduation, him and Trish just sorta fizzled out after she went crazy. Fang resented everyone, even Reed, and that led to no one reconciling. Trish immediately got the fuck outta town right after Reed expressed explicit interest in something that wasn't the stupid band shit. I guess that was the final straw. I still find it weird Fang never bothered to talk to Reed about any of this, but I guess it's a firm reminder he was always sorta the third wheel.

 

Apparently it's normal for like minded people like him to congregate at people's houses where they just sorta hang out with red solo cups in hand and slightly loud music playing in the background. Quite the experience, and now we do it semi frequently. Sometimes it's the same house, located funnily enough in Fang's parents neighborhood, sometimes it's on skin row. Lucky enough it was a nice suburb this time, and I wasn't designated driver this time. 

 

It had become routine for us at this point. I don't even know why Reed keeps me around. Something about me being 'funny' while intoxicated or high. A rough transition from my earliest experience with intoxicants. I think my general depression has horseshoed my demeanor into being somewhat charming around people. Reed uses that to get into good graces with dudes looking for developers for whatever the fuck scams they got going on online. I'm fine with being used as long as I get free beer.

 

I guess maybe today I wasn't feeling it. I stood in a corner almost the entire night, only moving into the crowd of dinos to get more liquor. The house was some new age, somewhat clean commune shared house that kinda' drained me. Reminded me of Fang's room with all the pride shit everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to be funny. Maybe at this point I was tired of…

 

…that's when I saw something in the mass of techno color freaks that really grabbed me by the cojones… 

 

…green stego female, long black hair grown past her shoulder,  off the shoulder shirt, My Toxic Romance branded, worn skinny jeans, vans…

 

It's fucking Stella with dyed hair. Fucking God it's Stella in a place like this. Why? How? She probably wouldn't even recognize me, what with my new, all black jacket. I uh… should probably go say hi to her. 

 

She was looking over a table full of alcohol, studying every bottle with a somewhat disinterested look on her face. She didn't look like she was enjoying herself, and like, yeah this place isn't for you queen.

 

"Uh, hey, Stella?" I had to say, somewhat loudly, as there was the aforementioned music in the background.

 

She jumped. Stepped back a little too. Must have really caught her off guard. Looks like she saw a ghost. I noticed she was probably wearing some sort of lavender scented perfume, obviously trying to get the new look over in every possible way imaginable.

 

Her shock turned into a smile. "Oh my GOD! ANON?!" she squealed. I was also surprised she recognized me at first, but I quickly realized that I was… the only human in our high school, and she read my future multiple times without me asking.

 

We fumbled a few tertiary lines before we both agreed it was too loud and decided to head outside to continue. Before that she headed off to grab an overcoat and inform the friend she must've brought here, or has been brought by, not sure which way it was. The idea of Rosa dragging her out to seedy places to mingle was funny.. 

 

"I thought you were leaving town after summer was over." She said to me as I closed the door behind us. "That was the plan, but I decided to stay."

 

I couldn't get over how different she looked. Her sorta lackadaisy outfit was replaced by this all black get-up better suited for a moody e-girl than a weeaboo like herself.

 

"I haven't heard anything from you since you called me out for catfishing you." She snickered. God was that really the last time we talked? "Yeah that was a pretty funny stunt you pulled. At the time I was furious but now it's just…"

 

We seemed to be taking a walk now. I thought we were just stepping out to chat but now it's a late night walk. Go figure. "... A slightly funny memory. Why did you do that anyway?"

 

"Well… to be honest I was sorta just looking for someone who enjoyed the same stuff as me, but getting anything out of you was hard to do face to face. So I felt like…"

 

Her glare shot down to the sidewalk in what I could only interpret as shame. "Hey I mean, you are right. For whatever reason I did have a stick up my ass about liking anime. Especially after Trish's stunt. But honestly I tackled it all wrong. Really I tackled everything wrong in high-school."

 

"Eh. Hindsight is 20/20." She scoffed, almost uncharacteristically. "I guess my fate really was sealed by those cards of yours."

 

Stella shook her head At The mention. "You know, it's pretty bittersweet. Knowing you can't really change anything about the future." 

 

"I'm sorta glad you tried to warn me about things…"

 

"I'm glad you feel that way Anon." She smiled, somewhat outta' her funk. "I can see your future has been you slowly becoming a pop punk princess queen. What's with the change in clothes?"

 

"I uhh.." she paused, sounding sorta embarrassed. "I just… I like the look." 

 

"I get that. It looks nice." 

 

She blushed, I noticed. The buzz I had from earlier was almost completely gone at that point. We seemed to have stumbled into a park that seemed a bit familiar. The chill of the autumn night was sobering. 

 

The leaves had all fallen at this point. Normally I wouldn't notice, being a shut in and all, but being forced out of my comfort zone had made me notice the death and rebirth all around me more frequently. It was such a beautiful night.

 

"So I gotta' ask. How did you end up at a place like that?" I asked candidly. "Well, the house is actually owned by one of Rosa's sisters, and Rosa really wanted me to branch out and meet new people… which was weird, considering how protective she normally is." 

 

"Well I'm glad to hear you and Rosa are still close. But yeah, I really doubt she knows the type of people who show up to these events." 

 

"I think she just wanted me to keep an eye on her sister's friends and keep them from stealing stuff, or breaking anything."

 

Something about the Rosa's family all being tech-bro party monsters while she herself was a trad cath with a deep love for gardening and a deeper fear of anime made my sides disintegrate. Too bad I had to keep my laughter on the inside in fear of looking like a weirdo.

 

"Sucks she’s using you as a watchdog.”

“Oh I don’t think she meant it like that. Rosa is too sweet to be using me. She lives in a different world.” she said with a hint of breathy exhaust. “She’s helped me so much, it’s the least I can do for her.” 

 

We parked on a bench to rest. I really didn't notice how far we were from our original starting point, but I really don't care. It was really nice to catch up. Not to say me and Reed were not tight, but he’s one of very few people I could have a prim and proper conversation with. Not just the normal coworker small talk or the drunk chit chat I have with goers.

 

Her sitting at the other end made me feel just as alienated as most other things in my life. I try not to stare at her but there’s something about her new look that strikes me. I just now noticed she’s wearing a band shirt. Never would have thought something like My Toxic Romance would tickle her fancy. I just sorta thought her wardrobe was filled with funny anime shirts. And the fucking makeup. Is this a new thing? When did this happen? But then I thought, it’s been a year, anything could have happened. 

 

“Uh, Anon, are you doing alright?”

Her words knocked me out of my stupor. I must have been staring, fucking oof. “Y-yeah. I’m okay. I wasn't like…”

 

“...staring at me?”

 

FuuuuuuuuuUUUUUCK me dude.



“I get it… It’s weird. It’s not how you know me… I can’t do fucking anything without people around me thinking I’m weird. I’m used to it.” She said with an angry inflection. While I do feel bad, I don’t think I could have ever expected her to react in such a way.

 

"That's… definitely not what I was thinking…"

 

"Then what could you possibly be thinking?"

 

"...I like the hair…"

 

She stopped dead in her thoughts, looking at me as if I was an injured dog looking for help. "Umh… t-thank you I just…"

 

"Been around Rosa too long?" I assumed out loud.

 

"Yeah… the first time she saw me with makeup she got out the wooden cross to keep in-between me and her."

 

Despite the strange imagery she smiled. "And my hair was a whole other story… I don't know, I just felt like changing it one day, and the stylist did a really good job I think."

 

There was an earnestness to her voice. "Yeah, they did. It all looks really good on you." I said back.

 

"You think so?!" Her eyes lit up at the notion. “I mean, I’ve had some guys hit on me… It’s not like I’m insecure… I just…” She continued to fumble her words. 

 

"I do not doubt guys hit on you more often. Degenerate dudes always pining over chicks doing the goth thing." I squawk back.

 

"I-I'm not going for that… it's just how I wanna dress!" Stella’s voice became a bit more coarse when I teased her. "Whoa hey, not trying to imply anything bad." I try to de-escalate. She seems to be a bit more moody now.

 

“I really, REALLY didn't peg you as a MTR fan though." I continued. "Unless you got into emo music recently."

 

Oddy she scoffed. "Well… they're not exactly emo, at least musically."

 

I raise an eyebrow. "Then what the fuck are they?"

 

"It's kinda' hard to say. Emo could be a lot of different things."

 

"Emo sounds like whining over a guitar to me. Sometimes it's a weird mix of rap and screaming over stupid sounding beats. Unless that was just a one time gimmick from the early 2010s?"

 

"That's uh… crunk. Something I'm not into, and emo DEFINITELY isn't just whining… I fucking hate it when people boil something I love down to something it isn't." 

 

She still sounded defensive. Good going boy wonder, your track record with women only gets better with time. 

 

"I guess I really don't know much about music in general. Everything I heard on the radio never really grabbed me as much as game OSTs did I guess. Maybe you could crash course me about stuff."

 

She tussled in her seat a bit. Somewhat intrigued by the suggested notion.

 

"Maybe I could show you some good stuff… but only if you really wanted me to."

 

"Well sure! I'm open minded… I think."

 

I had to think to myself; was what Fang did musically emo? Is emo punk? Is punk emo? A bunch of ideas and questions blended in my head that sorta lead me back to thinking about…

 

"I guess Fang never really explained to me what Emo really was, despite her probably being into it."

 

I saw Stella's eyes roll as my stomach filled with lead at the thought of her once again. Here I am trying to chat up a girl and the only thing I can think about is her. Fuck me sideways.

 

"I uh, should say that Lucy doesn't go by Fang anymore." 

 

Wat.

 

"Yeah."

 

"Really? Why's that?"

 

"Not sure. We are friends on social media, that's where I saw it.."

 

Insane news but I'd rather not focus on my ex.

 

"But anyway, I think Lucy wasn't into real emo. She liked stuff like… Pantamore and Blue Day. I don't think she would have helped your taste." She giggled a bit. Was… she shit talking Fang for being basic?

 

On one hand I appreciated the jab at her expense, on the other she shit talked Fang, and that triggered some sort of fight or flight response in me I had forgotten I had. I need to keep my rampant autism in check and just see where things take me.

 

But I mean, fuck, I can't even get her name right in my own thoughts. Strange things are happening to me.

 

"That's uh… fair to assume. Then you gotta' tell me, how do I get practitioners taste like you then?"

 

Her tail wagged its way a bit closer to me. "Oh ANON! I have SO much to show you!" Squealed out of her maw as she got her phone out of her pocket. "...if you want me to…"

 

Oh good raptor Jesus on a stick I'll take anything with her. Fuck she's cute. "Yes of course! But we should go and listen to stuff on something that isn't a phone speaker."

 

She blushed. Seems she's gotten ahead of herself.

 

"Y-yeah, your right Anon…"

 

"I bet it's been a long day for you, for both of us really. How about we get a cab and go hang out at my place for a bit. We could play videogames or-"

 

"Or listen to an album together?!"

 

"That sounds perfect actually."

 

I stood up from the freezing park bench and, to my immediate surprise Stella had jumped up too to wrap her arms around me for a surprise hug. I welcomed it back in kind, even if she did attack me from a weird angle.

 

I couldn't get over her mood swings as we started walking again. Once again I was conflicted, thinking about Fang like the wannabe stalker I was. She really lucked out on me, because once she blocked my number, I never reached out again. God knows how many terminally online guys have stalked their ex's for days on end after…

 

…God DAMN it Anon STOP. Who CARES. 

 

"So weird question but… whatever happened between you and Lucy?"

 

"Huh, what?"

 

"I mean, I heard you two broke up but… coming from her, it sounded kinda' bad."

 

Haha dude yeah, let me be forever defined by my fuck up. Just awesome.

 

"Well… yeah it didn't end well. I fucked up, but to be fair, I was drunk at the time. Probably fed up with school… but that's not a good enough defense for what I said to them."

 

"So her story was correct?" She asked, more curious than accusatory, so I appreciated that at least.

 

"May I ask, when was the last time you two spoke in person?"

 

"Not too long ago really. She actually called me the night you two broke up."

 

"Really?"

 

"She felt like she didn't have anyone else to talk to about it." She shrugged.

 

"Wait, you knew about everything, but you didn't bring it up until now?" I say slightly miffed off. 

 

"Well I was just happy to see a friend! Plus, it's been almost a year. I thought you were gone… it just surprised me you were still here."

 

If I didn't know any better, I would think Stella had some sort of ulterior motive.

 

"Fair enough. If you two are still talking though, does that mean you're gonna tell her about us still talking?"

 

"...it's complicated! Okay?!" Her voice was raised.

 

WHAT is with this girl?

 

I try to rebuttal with "I mean, it's cool. I'm definitely not gonna reach out to her first, but if you two are friends-"

 

"-Anon I need to tell you something." She cut me off.

 

"Uh sure. Shoot."

 

"Lucy was at the party."

 

"...okay, cool."

 

"And she wasn't ready for you to see her again so…"

 

"Soooo you took the bullet and got me outta there as quickly as possible."

 

At that moment, Stella dropped dead in her tracks.

 

"I just… wanted to do something nice for my friend…"

 

Really the only thing I could muster on the spot was a chuckle and a shake of my head, hands firmly in my pockets. I shouldn't have expected anything less from Fang, I don't even blame her, but having Stella go out of her way for…

 

…A second later, Stella grabbed for my wrists, un-nesting them from the pits of my jacket. She pulled them closer to her chest for emphasis on what she was about to say.

 

"... But I had a wonderful time talking to you! Y-you noticed things about me others don't bother to bring up. I-i appreciated all of it! And now we are going to your place to hang out… I don't wanna give that up!" 

 

Stella stared me directly in my eyes while saying all of this, so I think she's being genuine. 

 

"I know it was sorta shitty of me not to mention Lucy, and to lie about Rosa… but I don't wanna give this up just because it started off with bad intentions!"

 

This was all insane. Where did this all come from? All of this just to make Lucy a bit more comfortable? What the fuck do I even do now?

 

"Let's uh… talk about this when we get back to my place, alright?"

 

At that point my hands had been liberated from Stella's grasp and she had calmed down. I say calmed down, but it's obvious she's a bit glassy eyed. She nodded right before I got out the ride-sharing app and pinged us a way home. Problem being I had to bring her back to Skin Row, so big fucking oof.

 

I feel life itself is picking up speed and I’m just too tired to keep pace. I don't have the words to describe how I feel. Feels like I'm getting the ultimate cosmic shit test as I'm once again walking shoulder to shoulder with Stella. As if there was something I could say to make everything fall into place. A lot to think about… all I do is think…

 

It's obvious to me Stella isn't too thrilled by the fact I live here. Rolling up from a dead silent trip wasn't too reassuring, but I tried. 'Oh well, it's not THAT bad' I tried to get across, but I don't think that worked. I kept close to her while we walked up the door and that sorta kept her upright, but it wasn't till we were inside when she caught her breath.

 

"Welcome to Outer Heaven. Population: me and my robot.” I chuckle out loud.

She tilted her head and looked at me confused as she took her jacket off to hang on the back of my office chair. At least she wasn’t spooked anymore. The only real thing to fear here is the fact that all I can still afford is a one room apartment. 

 

And it sorta dawned on me, there is one chair in here. Reed hasn't even hung out with me since we started talking again. Brutal. 

 

“I uh… have a pet phone cleaner. Like a Roomba for your phone."

 

I grabbed Rey from the desk drawer I had him trapped in. Stella looked at it with only a slight interest. 

 

"So… music time?" She asked, brushing past my rampant autism. I nodded as I fired up the rig and opened up YouTube, inviting her to type in whatever.

 

She sat there deliberating on what exactly to show me first. The doofus I was, the recommended videos on my homepage were all longform video essays, random internet drama recaps and… low view let's plays of DOS games for some reason. Hopefully she wasn't paying attention to any of that.

 

She settled on a playlist called 'Translating The Name'. It's only five songs, so I'm guessing she's not looking to put me through the gauntlet. "I LOVE this EP and I think it's a really good starting point for anyone." She said, putting her hands together for emphasis.

 

"Yeah sure, give me whatever." I said with a smile as I sat on the edge of my bed.

 

As soon as she hit play, my crummy speakers were blaring with some… honestly okay stuff. I didn't know what to expect, but I wasn't this. The singer had this high pitched voice that kinda flew above the guitars and everything else. Took me a chorus or two to really 'get it', but when I did, damn it fucking hit me real good. I laid back while Stella did the same in my chair and I spent the next few songs just sorta taking everything in.

 

I wasn't paying too much attention to the lyrics, but if I was, I bet I would relate more to them. For whatever reason, I felt sorta... understood by something. By song 3 I was really into it. I couldn't put my finger on it, but the screaming in the music FELT like how it has felt since Fang left. Fuck me, I actually feel seen. It feels like my mistakes are finally giving me meaning, and that it's okay that I feel the way I do. Lots of feelings and shit, but it didn't feel unhealthy like it normally does.

 

Stella was on her phone periodically. I should probably give her something more than just sit there, but I'm so enraptured that I really don't want this to end. 

 

That's when she got up for the first time and… sat next to me. 

 

She leaned into my earshot to ask "So… do you like it?"

 

I nod, quite a few times, like a sped. "Yeah this is actually really good!" 

 

"Do… you wanna make this better?" She asked timidly. She had this sorta devious look on her face. Was she gonna offer drugs? Was Stella a pusher? 

 

"Well sure but… how-" I asked before she cut me off by grabbing me by the scruff of my shirt and planting her lips on mine. 

 

Immediately I'm taken aback by the sheer haste of her action. I didn't really know how to react. She leaned in a bit too far and our teeth mashed together, so that felt weird. We settled on just a slightly long peak before she pulled away.

 

"Woah what?" I exclaimed. I didn't really pull away, but I did freeze like a statue.

 

"I uh… may have read the situation wrong…" she said looking at the floor. Her tail had wrapped around her leg in probably shame. Obviously I couldn't let her feel that, so I returned the favor.

 

I guide her gently with my hand on her cheek to try the kiss again. I figured she wasn't too used to this sort of contact with people, explaining the awkward hug from earlier, so I felt like I had to be the one to step up and do… whatever it was she wanted to do. 

 

I really didn't wanna question it either. I was a lonely person in need of any sort of companionship, even if it is inherently vague and spontaneous. I wasn't sure where this came from, but I didn't care. She was new to all this, but she did buck up the courage to try going all the way with it and try the whole tongue thing. My god her tongue was long, sorta rough too, must be a stego thing. She got better at it the longer we tried till we found a rhythm that worked.

 

It took about 3 minutes for us to decouple ourselves from the second embrace, at some point we had to catch our breath after all. Stella was right though, making out to music does make it better. The playlist was just about over at this point and we hadn't said anything to each other. Looking into her eyes was all I personally needed, but I probably should ask where this came from.

 

"Not to say I don't appreciate this but I gotta ask…"

 

"...I… it… this just felt right. I'm not sure. I'm sorry Anon."

 

"No-no don't be. This was… really good. I'm just surprised." I say, taking her by the hands again.

 

"Do you wanna… try another album?" She said between labored breathing.

 

"Yes. Definitely."

 

She got up and immediately had something in mind. 'Downtown Battle Mountain'.

 

That sounds metal as fuck. 

 

She hit play and immediately pounced on me. Literally pushed me onto the bed. I don't think I'm going to get that explanation until later. That's fine.

 

Now she's on top of me. This was the least likely thing I thought would happen, but again, I'm fine with it.

 

It feels bad to think of Fang while this was all happening but she was my only real experience with any of this. One thing that was new was the tail. Stellas tail was long, so it couldn't wag like Fangs, but it did wrap around my arched leg. It was pretty tight too. She really didn't want me slipping away. 

 

We spent  a few more minutes playing tonsil hockey before I noticed that Stella was rubbing more than just her tail on my body. The slight movement from her crotch made it clear her attention, and that notion made me just a little bit nervous. 

 

Again she pulled back, towering over me and pushing my legs back down, inviting me to sit up just a bit. "I w-want you to take off your shirt." She commanded out of the blue. "Whoa whoa. Calm down there. This is all well and good, but what's with this all of a sudden?"

 

She just sighed and looked off to the side. "Anon I… I can't explain it. I felt something while we were talking in the park and it… may have reignited some feelings I had from highschool."

 

"You had feelings in high-school?"

 

"I'm more surprised you didn't notice… it was cool you liked the same stuff as I did. And seeing you with Lucy just… you seemed so cool to me."

 

"Sure but… is this really all over having the same interests? I'm sure plenty of other guys there have photoshopped anime bitches the same way I did." 

 

"Maybe. But you were funny… and seeing how you treated Lucy so well…"

 

My heart sank into the fucking ocean at the thought.

 

"Stella I appreciate the sentiment but… how that situation ended…"

 

"You were drunk, right? And besides… Lucy she… she was always so fucking mean to me."

 

Damn, new revelation. Stella had gotten off me and sat once again on the side of the bed.

 

"I see it as karma for her." She continued. "I know it's fucked up but… having been treated like a freak for liking anime… and then ending up with you…"

 

Her eyes went glassy. I shot up to comfort.

 

"...she got better. She's a friend now. she has a really good reason to not like you… but I don't care… I really wanted this."

 

A few tears fell from her eyes and onto her chest as the music continued. I wondered if she's been here before.

 

The only thing I could do was wrap my arms around her and comfort the poor stegosaurus. I think I understand more than I ever did. I guess I have this really uncanny ability to find girls right before they break down crying. Really this was all familiar, down to the kissing. Fang Did it by accident but like… close enough. We settled on cuddling. It was almost one in the morning, any lustful intent just drained out of my body as soon as I looked at the clock.

I’ll put the pieces together in the morning. Odd how time flies. Odd how people shake.