I don’t remember how I had gotten there, but I think I found myself back on my feet. I pitched forward and almost fell again, hands steadying me before I reached the point of no return. My head slumped down until I was looking at the ground and I found myself a little mesmerized as I watched red drops spatter against the cement. Wait.. when did we leave the beach? I glanced at the person beside me. No.. not the person. THE person. Fang. She looked pained and pissed at the same time. It was a weird combination to see, especially directed at me. The pissed I understood, but I couldn’t place why she had tears in her eyes.. she was shouting something, but I couldn’t make out what it was over the whine in my poor ears. She had something in her hand, a black rectangle. When she pressed it against her head my mind finally pieced together what it was. “No!” My shout seemed to surprise her as she flinched. “No… no hospital..” I couldn’t bear the thought of that. I also probably couldn’t afford it. “Please..” A small voice of reason was whispering something in the back of my head, but I couldn’t hear him either. My face burned as I spoke. Something definitely wasn’t right… She- wait that wasn’t right was it? No.. it’s they. They let out a growl and shoved the phone back into their pocket. An arm wrapped around me and started to lead me somewhere. I was having a difficult time taking my eyes off the ground. A flashback seemed to strike me, of Fang helping me get home after falling down the stairs. It was a nice memory, despite all the pain and humiliation, It was a nice day. I was pulled from the memory as I was practically pushed into the back of a dark car. “Wait..” “I have a jacket back there! Bunch it up and press it against your face.” I could barely hear Fang's order but it seemed to snap me into focus as I tried to piece together what was happening. I was forgetting something… “..can’t leave… everything.. back there.” It was starting to really hurt, the pain was sobering up whatever was clogging up my brain. “Put that-“ I suddenly had something clothy in my hands. “On your face. I’ll get your shit.” I did as they told and pressed the jacket on my face. I hissed as fire erupted across the skin. And when I pulled back it was already red with blood. In fact, so was my sweater. And the seat I was sitting on. That’s… bad.. I tried to pinpoint how bad it was. But in the dark without a mirror I was practically shit out of luck. But I could at least tell that it was the right side of my face that felt like it had boiling water spilled on it. The front door opened as Fang slid in, tossing the revolver into the passenger seat and setting the white envelope on the console. They seemed to hesitate, staring at something illuminated in their palm. The light winked out as they tossed my phone to the side. The car rumbled as it cranked, and my stomach rolled a bit as we jerked into motion. I peeked out from the jacket, using it to try and wipe the blood out of my eyes. I expected to see them disappear as each swipe blocked my vision. To be back on that beach suffering a delirious hallucination as I bled to death alone. But they were still there. Phone pressed against their head once again. My head spun a bit as I attempted to pull myself up to protest, causing me to slump back down into the seat. “Hey it’s me.” Ok that didn’t sound like 911. “Listen, I need you.” The other side was too quiet for my damaged ears to pick up. “At my apartment, it’s an emergency…No! I haven’t… done anything in a while. It’s..” their eyes met mine for a second. “Someone else. Just.. I need you, now! Bring some supplies… I don’t know! Medical ones!” Fang slammed the phone against the steering wheel twice before throwing it into the floorboard. “Fuck! Fuck! Fucking! Fuck!” I flinched at the sudden screams as they vented. “What the fuck were you doing!” The last bit was directed at me. What was I doing? It was pretty obvious. I was going to shoot myself. I.. I did shoot myself. It was suddenly a bit harder to breathe as my chest seemed to constrict. I actually did it.. I was ready to die. I had a plan and for once in my life I was going to follow through. And I fucked it up. I couldn’t EVEN KILL MYSELF RIGHT! How fucking pitiful I must look right now… A horrifically pathetic sounding sniffle escaped me before I could choke it back in. I tried to look anywhere but the front, covering my face with the jacket again and looking at the back of the seat instead I couldn’t stop my shoulders from shaking, my other hand clutching my chest in a vain attempt to stifle the jerks. A low sigh comes from the front. “You’re… you’re gonna be ok, Anon.” Those simple words only intensified the feelings of worthlessness. They shouldn’t want me to be ok! I didn’t want to be ok! Here I was again, the fucking failure who’s so goddamn pathetic Fang of all people pities me! My gaze fell downward, attempting to distract myself with anything I could think of as I stared at the floor. The simple movement caused a bit of blood to trial down my nose. I could barely see the drop pool at the tip of my nose before it dripped onto the floor. I wiped at it with the sleeve of my sweater as if that would clean it up. I felt stupid, dirtying their back seats with my filth. I wasn’t worth the stains. My efforts only smeared the red streaks as I tried to scrub the seat. I couldn’t muster much strength into my frantic wipes. Couldn’t keep my fucking hands steady. The jacket was plastered to the right side of my face pretty well, but my scrubbing seemed to have knocked it loose. The second one of my hands raised to grab it, the other slipped off the side of the seat, sending me face down into the cushion. My vision swam, either from the pain or the tears. I feebly brushed at the new mess I made as the car jolted again, nearly sending me into the floorboards. My stomach heaved at the movement, bile suddenly rising into my throat. Fuck that! Man up Anon you are not about to make a bigger mess! I clenched my jaw tight as bile filled my mouth. My eyes watering as it flooded my sinuses. Fuck, damnit! I couldn’t hold it… Stomach acid spewed from my nose, ending my battle as my jaw went slack. I retched into the floorboards, bringing up half disgusted pizza and coke. And that’s how they found me. Lying in blood and vomit. The door in front of me was opened, Fang getting the first true look at the state I left their car in. “I’m sorry…” Fang signed and grabbed my shoulders, sliding me across the seat with a grunt. “I’m sorry..” “They’re just seats, now come on! Help me out here.” I tried to get my feet under me but they no longer seemed to work. My vision swam as tears started to fall again. “I’m sorry..” “One foot after the other! That’s all you have to worry about.” I couldn’t look away from their face. Their makeup had run, leaving dark streaks down their cheeks. Lips pulled back in a grimace that hinted at sharp teeth, hair short and shaggy. But the eyes drew me in the most. I almost froze when I locked gazes with those amber orbs. They had lost the youthful energy they once carried, but I swear I could see a spark buried in them. They quickly broke the contact. A wave of shame and embarrassment rocked through me as I stared at them, the surge of emotion catching me off guard as I choked. “I’m sorry…” I grabbed their shoulders, finding some strength again. “I told you it’s not impor-“ “Fang!” They finally looked at my face. They seemed to have difficulty keeping eye contact, their eyes drifting to the right side of my face before darting back. My voice was shaky and weak, breaking shortly after my shout. “I’m sorry.” For saying those things. “I’m sorry.” For leaving. “I'm sorry. ” For ignoring you at the parlor. “ I’m sorry.” For everything.. They stared at me for a second with their lips in a small ‘o’. Then dug their claws straight into my arms hard enough to draw blood. “Oh you’re going to be if you bleed out in my apartment you little pussy!” Fang snaked an arm around my waist and twisted a claw into my side. “Now. Get. Moving!” I was drug to a door and again found myself shoved into it. My legs gave out and I landed on my knees. “Shit! Come on just… I don’t know! Get on the table!” The door led straight into a small kitchen area that was connected to what looked like a living room esque area. A clatter drew my attention to the kitchen where Fang had ripped a small table cloth off, sending an old dish onto the floor. “Here lay down.” They looped an arm under me and helped me scramble onto the tabletop. “Ok. Ok ok. Let’s see..” They paced around me, circling the table. “Bandages.. I don’t have any! Towels!” They took off down a hallway out of sight. With Fang preoccupied my mind began its downward spiral as I was left alone. How the fuck did this happen? I tried desperately to piece together the chaotic sequence of events that brought me here. The memory of the cold barrel pressed against my chin threatened to unravel my thin composure, almost triggering another uncontrollable wave of sobs. I couldn’t escape the harsh reality. I had come so close to ending it. What had driven me to this point? Fear and shame swirled inside me, twisting the knife deeper. Every turn was a reminder of how far I had fallen. A fresh twinge of pain lanced up my face making me wince. I think.. I think Fang hit me? Something did at least, my neck felt strained and sore. I must have missed. Ok obviously I missed, or I wouldn’t be here… Why was she- they there? None of this made sense. I shouldn’t be here! It should have all been over. Done. But it isn’t.. I’m here. Fang rushed back into the kitchen with a white towel in their arms. It quickly found itself pressed against my face. It wasn’t instantly soaked in blood, so I took that as a good sign. “Alright.. so I think we just apply pressure. Does that sound right?” A gentle touch pressed against the cloth on my face. I only nodded, not trusting my voice. I jumped a bit when a knock suddenly came from the door, twisting painfully in Fang's grasp to try and get an eye out from under the towel. Fang’s other hand joining ceased my movement. “Get the fuck in here!” A hurried bang sounded as someone barged into the room following the order. “Fang there was blood on the driveway is- oh shit!” Oh no, I knew that voice.. “what happened, who the hell is that. Oh fuck please tell me he’s not dead!” Naser sounded like was on the verge of a freak out already. “He’s not dead! But he’s lost a lot of blood… I.. I don’t know how much” Something clacked on the table next to me. “We need to get him to a hospital now!” I shook my head side to side. Please.. don’t take me to a hospital. I wasn’t even sure why, but I couldn’t bear the thought. Fang hesitated for a second. “Hospital isn’t an option..” “What? Am I supposed to…” his voice cut out for a second. “Wait… that’s why you called me! Fang what the fuck am I supposed to do! I can’t do this!” “You have to!” They shouted back. “You swore an oath! The hippo thing!” “No I didn’t! I haven’t graduated yet!” I felt Naser lean on the table and take a deep breath. “Hey, buddy!” I heard snapping over my face. “You lucid?” I nodded. “My names Naser. I am currently a med student at Volcadera Med. you know what that means?” It means he’s a student I guess. “That means I’m not a doctor, I can not promise you proper care. So once again, are you sure about this?” I nodded as best I could. “Alright let’s get a look at this.” He slipped a claw under the corner of the towel. I had to squint a bit as light suddenly assaulted my eyes again. “Oh shit…” I barely heard Naser whisper. “Fang what the fuck happened?” My eyes trailed over to the other side searching for Fang. We locked eyes as they hesitated, as if waiting for my approval. I nodded. “He uh.. he shot himself.” Fang glanced to the side, breaking eye contact. “That’s rough man.” I felt his hands cup my face as he took in the injury. “Least you’re a crappy shot!” Was that a fucking joke? “Sorry I’m.. sure this is difficult for you.” His eyes traced my face, roaming away from the injured side for the first time as he made eye contact. Suddenly he seemed to freeze, eyes clouding in confusion as his brow crinkled. Realization finally seemed to dawn as his eyes widened in shock. It didn’t last long before it morphed into a scowl as he growled out a groan. “You better have a good fuckin excuse ready by the time we finish here Anon!” He popped the buttons off his sleeves and rolled them up. “What the hell is he doing here Fang?” “I told you he was watching us play right?” Fang knew? They fucking knew… When I tried to turn, Naser's hand latched onto my chin and forced me back to looking straight up at the ceiling light. “Stop moving.” He ordered as he let his grip relax. “We’ll talk later, Fang. Alcohol.” “What?” They sounded confused. “Bleedings slowed enough. I’m gonna just say fuck it, stitch it, pack it, and bandage it. Need to disinfect everything so I need alcohol.” “You know I’m not supposed to have any..” “Yeah I know. I also know you. And this would be a very bad time to prove me wrong.” A sigh came from my left as I heard Fang drag a chair away from the table. I also felt it prudent to keep my lips sealed about the beer she had at the parlor.. A bit of shuffling later and I heard a thud as Fang came back into view. They had a bottle in their claws filled with brown liquid. Naser sighed as he took it. “That’s it I swear!” Fang's voice shook a bit. “I haven’t…” their eyes flicked down towards me. “Done anything else. You can check!” “I.. I believe you.” He quickly popped the top off. “You’ve been doing great. You’re trying and we see that. You know that don’t you?” “I’m sorry.” Fang's head was lowered as they stared at the edge of the table. “Later. When this is over let’s go ahead and schedule another appointment ok?” Fang’s head bobbed as she nodded. “Now, Anon. Close your eyes and mouth. Also try not to jerk your head around too much” The bottle tipped above my face. I didn’t get time to prepare, my eyes shutting more on reflex than thought. I wasn’t ready for the pain. The liquid met my wounded flesh, and the searing sensation ripped through like a wildfire. My instincts screamed at me to pull away, to escape the boiling pain, but I clung to Naser’s words. I slammed my fist into the table, biting down on a scream that tore up my throat. Naser and Fang maintained a firm grasp on me as I transitioned from frenzied thrashing into a trembling surrender. “Wow, that looked like it sucked.” I could just make out Naser’s smug fucking face through the tears in my eyes. “Just imagine how easy that would have been with painkillers and anesthesia. Next-” he held up some tiny object. “We need a lighter.” He dumped alcohol on the thin object. I shimmed a weak hand into my pocket, shuffling around until I felt a familiar rectangle. I held up my navy zippo, Naser quickly snatching it. My hand flopped down much harder than I intended to. I think.. I think the room is starting to spin. The light above me slowly started to swirl. Naser seemed to stare at the lighter as he flipped it around to look, grunting before sparking it up. The needle in his hand bursted into flames as he quickly shook it out. The edges of my vision seemed to darken. My face scrunched as I weakly shook it side to side, but a hand from Naser quickly stopped my attempts. I tried to focus on the shape of Naser above me. He had the lighter on the needle again until it seemed to glow. “Alright Anon. Hope you’re ready.” His grip on my face tightened. My breathing was already labored but it kicked up further as the needle approached. “Easy now, a few pinches and we’ll be done.” His words were muddled. Oh fuck.. I.. I’m not feeling too good. A blurred shape waved above me. Something pressed to my lips, which I gulped from instinctively. “Hey! Drink! We don’t have the luxury of an iv so you need as much fluid as you can get!” I tried. But I don’t think I got the full glass down before choking. “Oh fuck is he alright!” Yeah I’m fine… just need to rest a bit. “Hey, Anon! Keep those eyes open!” Cold fingers forced my lids open, giving me a quick look at the blurs above me. A gray one on the left, brown one on the right. “Shit, alright we’re doing it now. Hold him down.” I was losing some sort of battle… What was I fighting? Something happened… I fucked something up. How original… A searing pain was the last thing I felt as I finally drifted off into the blackness. [POST-NOTES] Alright and that is chapter 2. Chapter 3 probably will take a bit longer as I already had chapter 2 halfway written when I posted chapter 1. But I am working on it.