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Anonymous Wed 10 Jul 2024 13:26:07 No.67274289 Report

Quoted By: >>67274306 >>67274320 >>67274349 >>67274808 >>67275007

>>67274254
Hey writeanon , good to see you. Can i get a continuation of this?

Anonymous Wed 10 Jul 2024 14:24:03 No.67275007 Report

>>67274289

>I return with Nick to her place. I'm worse off than I'd thought. I just about collapse as I get inside. Maybe a borderline sauna trip was overdoing it.
>"You good?" I get a hand offered. I gingerly accept and am lead inside to my loaned room. Borderline death from exhaustion aside I do feel a touch better. Must be something to that sunlight stuff. I fall into bed and her a quick knock. I lean my head up to see Nick stride in.
>"Here." Oh she's carrying a glass of water. I accept and take a swig as she sets on the edge of the bed.
>"Take it easy. I get you're trying to but no need to rush." Can't even get better right, huh? I sigh and nod as she stands, turning to face me as she closes the door.
>"Call me if you need anything." I nod to her and am left alone again.
>I lean back and let the hurt whelm me. Sore leg. Sore body. Sore soul. A resolution to be actually survive does not a plan make. I stare up at the ceiling and focus a bit. No rushing, sure but that doesn't mean I can't at least use my brain for something other than stewing itself in regret.
>I'm going to actually need to talk to mom and dad at some point. We'll start there. Or maybe not as my phone dings, a message. It's from an unknown number.
>"Hi, Anon. This is Rosa. Stella gave me your number and I wanted to know if we could meet sometime tomorrow afternoon?" I blink down at the message.
>My first instinct is to get away from any interaction possible. I've learned that my first instinct is usually wrong. I bunker down and dig in deep. I'm doing this. I already spoke with Stella, this will be fine. I muster up the effort to reply. Short but meaningful.
>"Sure, any place you had in mind?"
>A few moments later and I've got a confirmation. A small restaurant. As I go to accept I remember that Stella isn't the best at relaying information. I have to triple check.
>"It's alright if I bring someone, yeah?"
>"Of course! Stella already told me about your living arrangements." Thank you, Stella.
c

Anonymous Wed 10 Jul 2024 14:37:48 No.67275213 Report

Quoted By: >>67275378

>>67275007
>I drop my phone back into my lap and lose the last energy I'd had up to that point. I feel the dark thoughts peering at me, kept barely at bay via distractions. One slip and I'm right back in them.
>I blink slowly and try my best to not just sink into despair. What's all this even for? I'm fighting this hard and for what? Just to wake up back in a wounded body, alone and miserable? I can't fight the emotions anymore, the last of my will dried.
>Memories, regrets, every negative emotion I have just wracks my being. I fade into a fugue, a view of my life from an outside perspective. I can't even bring myself to be angry anymore.
>All of this culminates on a singular thought. Do I deserve this? It's multi-faceted and brings a ring of consciousness back to me.
>Do I deserve a second chance? Do I deserve all this pain. Do I deserve sympathy? Do I deserve to even draw breath. No answers come to me but a strange sense of anger rises.
>An emotion I thought could only ever be pointed back at myself finds a foothold outside.
>This is my fault. I brought all this upon myself but...
>I wasn't alone in this.
>Flashes of the nightmares I've been seeing return. Blood and corpses. Strangely, they don't sicken me as they should. Instead a horrid thought slowly manifests.
>Maybe they deserved it.
>I shoot straight up and almost vomit. I heave and choke back as my stomach violently threatens to revolt should I continue that line of thought. The adrenaline clearing my head and numbing my nerves. Guess I still have a line I won't cross even after all that.
>I'm almost relieved at myself as I suddenly hear the door.
>Nick steps in looking worried. "Cmon, dude."
>I sigh and wave as she approaches.
>"I'm good just a bad dream." I find her sitting rather close to me.
>I look up and see a strange sort of annoyance on her. Finally wore her out of patience I see.
>"Anon, please. I can't help you if you won't let me."
cont.

Anonymous Wed 10 Jul 2024 14:48:34 No.67275378 Report

Quoted By: >>67275516

>>67275213
>"It was just a bad dream I-"
>"Anon!" I startle as she raises her voice forcefully.
>"Talk to me." I start to reel from her forcefulness but I'm reminded once more of what exactly that brought me. If not for her I'm not certain I'd even be alive. I close my eyes and speak.
>"I went back to dwelling on everything. About how I wasn't sure about anything and was feeling like I was going to be swallowed up again. Then..." I struggle to admit my thoughts but her firm grasp on my hand leads me.
>"I started to find myself thinking the same way...Fang did." I choke a second.
>Nick doesn't speak.
>"For just the smallest second I thought... maybe what she did was..." I can't say it.
>"Anon." I look up to see Nick neutral.
>"You can do it." I focus hard and manage to pull it out of me along with Nick's help.
>"I thought for a second maybe they had it coming." I expect a gasp or any reaction. Instead I get nothing but a small phrase.
>"Did they?"
>The world swirls. My thoughts clash and shatter. Her words mix with my own thoughts. I shut my eyes and see Fang again. Her face repeating that same question.
>I find the anger again. It's starting to clear. No longer muddy and confused but pointed and sharp. A spear of frustration and exasperation. i follow it's pointed tip. I start to finally paint the picture of where this unexplained wrath comes from. The scene starts to unfold.
>There's only one person who was completely unreasonable and unfair with me. And I've come to realize it's not me.
>The hazy scene finally starts to solidify. I hate what my eyes show me.
>It's Fang. I feel the spark light up at her face.
>My mind pieces the puzzle together finally. Why I'm so torn. I'm livid at Fang.
>Logic flows. She hurt so many. I have my answer as I open my eyes. I push out the words. Spiteful and hard.
>"No. No they fucking didn't."
>Nick reels a bit but I don't stop. I can't stop.
cont. The rise.

Anonymous Wed 10 Jul 2024 14:59:12 No.67275516 Report

Quoted By: >>67275554

>>67275378
>"They were shitty. They hurt her. SO WHAT? SO THAT JUST LETS YOU BE JUDGE, JURY AND GODDAMNED EXECUTIONER!?" I find myself yelling. This surprising energy seemingly coming from nowhere. I can't even stop to feel guilty and continue.
>"SHE CHOSE THE EASIEST WAY OUT AND DRAGGED ME, no, EVERYONE! DOWN WITH HER." I blink and find myself towering over Nick as I've found my way to my feet.
>"AND I HAVE TO LIVE WITH IT! " I frustratedly slam my hand on the wall. A soft thud echoing out. As the fury leaves me so does my ability to stand. I just about collapse forward but am caught by Nick. I feel empty.
>To my utmost surprise I feel a comforting hand stroke my back.
>"Feel better now?" Her tone is coy. She fucking did this on purpose. I let out a nasty single chortle.
>"Fuck you."
>"That's a yes, then." I'm gently guided down to the bed as Nick stands.
>"I'm not going to apologize for that. You needed it." I'd very much like her to never ever push me like that again but she still comes up correct at every turn.
>"Guess so. I'm not going to thank you for it." I still feel some of the disgust and hatred finding it's way into my words. She shrugs them off.
>"I'll come get you for dinner. Sleep well."
>As the door clicks closed I find my eyes shutting. I'm stirred again as food's ready. I find a bit of a rise in my energy as I stand to join.
>As I sit down to eat Nick smiles a bit wickedly at me.
>We eat mostly quietly, today having been way too much already and I end up on the couch with her watching some mindless television.
>"Whenever you need to let it out just come ask. I'm here for ya." She speaks without looking at me. I'm stunned at her. Between how sweet she was and now this insistence on trying to push me to snap I simply can't get a read on her. I notice a smirk as she glances sidelong at me. She knows exactly what she's doing and that bothers me.
cont one more.

Anonymous Wed 10 Jul 2024 15:02:43 No.67275554 Report

Quoted By: >>67275684

>>67275516
>I return to my room and fall into an actual sleep. Too empty to even dream my night is filled with empty darkness. I open my eyes to the sunlight pouring in. I still feel shitty but it's a new shitty. Less of a bogged down, drowning in the weight of life shitty but a more aching upset shitty. I think I finally settle on an answer to one of my previous questions. What's this all for?
>Spite. I'm going to get up and live because life doesn't want that for me. Every inch I drag back is a moral victory.

Fin, Rosa next time I found a tangent to go on instead.

>>67274302
Next, definitely gonna spill over. oh well.