They taught you that depression
was a girl crying in the dark painting crimson lines across her wrist
a razor blade glinting in the light of a phone whose screen
illuminates two words:
good bye.
They taught you it was tragedy and poetry and beauty all in one
but also told you it was weakness
that it was disgusting
and that those scars were a cry for attention no one would listen to because
let's face it:
she doesn't really have it that bad, does she?
They taught you it meant being strong for too long
but reminded you that someone else somewhere has been strong for even longer
and hey, they're still going just fine.
After all, there are starving children in other countries
and people with no homes dying of diseases no known cures exist for so
let's face it:
they should stop whining about being sad all the time.
They taught you depression was an emo or goth kid with hair as black as their soul
and eyeliner so thick they were called raccoons
sitting in groups at the lunch table complaining how hard life was
because daddy wouldn't buy her a new car
or mommy didn't let him go to the concert last week and
let's face it:
depression is a joke.
They never taught you that boys hurt too.
They never taught you that one day you might be sitting in the sunlight
in the green grass outside with your best friends all around you
and feel utterly alone.
They never taught you that it was a balancing between pretending to be okay
and not knowing what "okay" really means anymore.
They never taught you that you would be staring at a wall
with your chest so tight you can hardly breathe
and oh gosh it hurts so much but you can't tell anyone because
let's face it:
you don't really want to be like those kids, right?
They never taught you it was long sleeves and jeans in summer
even though it feels like you're boiling from the inside out
and you don't mean because of the weather.
They never taught you some day you would feel so empty
and oh my gosh what is wrong with you why can't you suck it up and be happy
for just one minute and
let's face it:
what the hell does "happy" mean anymore?
They never taught you this could happen to you.
They never taught you depression was chemical
your brain rebelling against you due to an accident of genetics
and damn it, you didn't ask for this
didn't want everyone to tell you you were faking or that you wanted attention because
let's face it:
why don't you just be happy?
Don't they know you tried?
~January 1, 2015~
~ShatteredScribe~