A Quik! A Quik!
Adapted from “A Quake! A Quake!” (Randy Rogel)
To the tune of “The Happy Farmer” (Robert Schumann)

This is the kitchen: somewhere in American suburbia.
On the hazy afternoon
Of the twenty-fourth of June
The year was circa nineteen eighty-one
At two-thirty on the dot
One tall glass would hit the spot
When indoors I paused from frolic in the sun

A Quik! A Quik!
So choc’latey and thick
Strawberry’s also out there
But I’ll leave that to the chicks
I’m drinking Nestle Quik
It’s really pretty slick
And I can tell it goes real well
With piqqle on a stiq

Now I’ve had my fill of Ovaltine
Carnation Instant, too
And that tin of Hershey’s Cocoa
Only drove me more cuckoo

For a Quik! A Quik!
It’s not a dirty trick
Each fluid ounce will never bounce
It sits there like a brick
A Quik! (A Quik?)
Yes, Quik, you lunatic!
Now quench my thirst or be the first
I call a derelict
See, the only thing I had for lunch
Was mayo on a bun
And if I run out of energy
I’m also out of fun

Without a Quik! A Quik!
I’ll be like Cousin Vic
Who spent a week in bed, too weak
To point or even click
The sugar’s quite a kick
In the Astleys, Jon and Rick
Or could it be George Clooney
And his papa, Mister Nick?

The Nutrition Facts proclaim that Quik
Has vitamins galore
But it’s not so great if taken straight
That’s what the milk is for!

Oh, a Quik! A Quik!
Oh, my! The clock just ticked!
Another second’s gone; now it’s
Two-thirty-one-oh-six
The summer’s fading fast
I want each day to last
So when school resumes I can just write, “BOOM!
(I.e., I had a blast.)”

I promise this will tide me over
Till Dad’s home from work
So Mommy, pretty please,
Oh, would you be my soda jerk?

A Quik! A Quik!
Two flavors; take your pick
I’d fix one by myself, but Quik
Is not my bailiwick
Oh, thank you for the Quik
It’s cool and smooth and thick
We’re close, my friend; here comes the end
Of this sticky, icky shtik

Pour the powder, wet it down
Stir it ’round
Milk turns brown
Now you’ve gotta chug it down
Time’s a-wastin’!

A Quik! A Quik!
I think I’m getting sick
No, there’s no need to clarify it
I’m not even gonna try it
I’m just going on a diet
Drinking Slim-Fast choc’late shakes!