Stories can start pretty much anywhere, when you get right down to it. There's nothing in the laws of narrative causality that says you have to start your story in the small village under the morning sun, or in the market square of  a bustling city, or the countless other places one usually begins.

This story, if anything could truly said to have a distinct beginning, could have started a good thousand years previous, when a great knight, a fierce barbarian, and a wise mage worked together to forge a legendary weapon, one that would be so virulent against the forces of evil that merely touching it would be very painful to them.

It could have started thirty years after that, when a great war came and the three friends betrayed each other and were struck down.

It could have started five years prior to now, when a mysterious warlord named Almakanti started carving a burning part of the lands of this world out for himself to rule.

Our story doesn't actually begin at any of those points, however. As important as all these things are, our story concerns itself with a horse.

This horse was a young one, barely able to claim the title of man, at least from age. He was tall and toned, as horses of his village tended to be, but not particularly strong like other men of his village were. His fur was the deep brown of good earth, his long hair the off-white of flax linen, his eyes the violet of the flowers that would cover his home in spring.

What truly set him apart, though, was the expression he wore on his face. You didn't see such wide, innocent eyes on adults like him very often. He always looked like he was about to ask a question that usually wouldn't come.

The other men of the village didn't know what to make of him. He was the son of the village blacksmith, and was apprenticed to him, and he could certainly make horseshoes and arrowheads. He was very competent.

The problem was, he always seemed to be looking past people to some world only he could see.  You sometimes had to ask him something twice because he'd be thinking about this, that, and the other.

His name was Thax Homebred.

Today saw him on a day off. The harvest had recently happened, and all that was left was the festival to be had soon.

Thax had heard about harvest festivals in other places. He understood them to be big, complicated do's with a lot of entertainers and jugglers and people who'd put ferrets down their trousers.

His village of Tjordeaux, however, celebrated relatively sedately. Just some music, dancing, and good food. And, if one was lucky, more private celebrations elsewhere.

But that wouldn't be for another day or so. For now, he was just sitting, leaning against a tree just outside the village, with a book in his hand.

A book! What luck he'd had that there were people coming through that sold such things. Most of the village didn't have use for the written word, but Thax's father did. When you had things in writing, it stuck.

Thax's literacy beyond the basics for contracts, however, had much to do with his mother. His dad never said where she came from, and she never talked about it. He'd see some of the village give her odd looks, but never really say anything either, at least where he could see it.

And the fruits of this love of reading were a lot of ideas in Thax's head that seldom found any out. If anything, it seemed to annoy the others.

So here, out of the way, he sat, reading this book. It was a book about heroes and villains, bravery and debauchery, good and evil in various struggles over the history of the land.

As he read, he sniffled, his eyes watering. He'd be glad for the coming of winter. All this pollen really got to him. Were it not for a cloth around his face, spring would be practically unbearable.

He finally got to the part about the sword-axe. He'd heard stories about it from other places. Bards would come through town sometime and sing songs about it for a bite to eat and a place to sleep, as well as whatever coins were thrown their way. He always wondered how one would combine a sword and an axe together in a way that'd make it anything but the unwieldy thing that sprung to his mind.

He knew how to use a sword and an axe. His father had taught him from a young age. "What kind of blacksmith wouldn't know how to use what he made?" he'd often say. Knives, swords, axes, these he knew how to use. Even bows, though he wasn't quite as good at those. He always ended up pulling right and landing his arrows too high.

The sword and the axe had very different methods of being wielded. He didn't really get how you could combine them at all.

As he pondered this, he heard somebody approaching through the tall grass. He placed the bit of paper from a flour sack he'd been using as a bookmark into the book and shut it, gently setting it aside as he looked to see who was coming.

There she was. She was the daughter of the village chief (technically the village was headed by a council of elders, but there was always one who'd be first among equals, and her father was it). She had lovely roan fur, and her mane was straw blonde. She was a bit taller than him, and more muscular, though she had plenty of the softness and ladylike curves that one would want out of a woman out here in the country. Able to carry two huge beer barrels under each arm, she'd be the envy of anybody and a very popular lady.

Or she would, if her name wasn't the unfortunate Ifartine. Sadly, her mother wasn't as nimble with reading as Thax's, and misread a very important name in some history book.

But her name didn't bother Thax very much, which is why they'd gotten along so well.

"There you are, Thax! I thought you'd be here with your nose in a book."

"Hello, Ifartine. I was hoping I'd see you today."

She sat against the tree next to him. It didn't bother him that his head came up to her shoulders. Quite the opposite, in fact.

"So what's this book about?"

"History. I just got to the part about the sword-axe."

"I always wondered how that would work," Ifartine said, "Is it a sword one one end and an axe on the other? Is it a sword blade coming out of the axe head on top? How would that work?"

Ifartine, too, knew the pleasures and importance of reading. Her father had the biggest library in Tjordeaux, which isn't really saying much since the average villager had about as much use for literacy as a cat does a vegan cookbook. Still, there were many books that the big horse lady had cut her teeth on.

"It said that there weren't any surviving drawings or art of any kind of the sword-axe from the time," Thax said, "so we don't really know what it looked like. You'd have to go find it yourself, I guess."

Ifartine gave a sigh. "You know, I wouldn't mind going and looking for it one bit. Except..."

Thax nodded. He knew the village had something of a problem lately. His thoughts didn't really want to go down this road, though, so he put his hand on Ifartine's thigh.

Her hand joined his there, and they stared into the sky for a while.

"So, have you talked to your father any more?" Thax asked.

"He doesn't want to hear any more about it. I don't really blame him. He keeps asking if I'm really, really sure, and whether I've talked with the other guys still around, but you know how that is. I just wish he wouldn't be so hands off, no matter what his duties have him do."

"You've told him about how they won't even consider you?"

"Dozens of times. He won't listen of course."

Thax looked into Ifartine's eyes. "You know, it's their loss. What you've got more than makes up for it."

Under that tree in a field a good ways away from the village, they kissed.

"You know," the big mare said coyly, "nobody else is around. It's just us here."

"Yeah, that's true, isn't it?"

"Why don't we cheer each other up?"

In answer, almost simultaneously, their hands went straight for their lover's lower garments. Ifartine's hand went into Thax's trousers, trying to extract the thick, growing tube that was trying to sneak down the leg, while Thax pulled up Ifartine's long skirt and snuck his own hand down her bloomers, feeling her already dampening lower mounds.

"Most everyone else is on the other side of the village," Ifartine struggled to get out as her mind started to sink into the pink mists of arousal, "We can be as loud as we want here."

Thax couldn't answer much. The pink mists already constricted themselves around his brain, his speech center strangled as though it were in the squeezing grip of a constrictor snake.

"We can do anything you want to, Thax, so long as it's outside," she continued. "Where do you want to start?"

Thax mutely reached his other hand around to massage one of Ifartine's massive mammaries.

"Hah, I knew you'd go straight for them. I see when your eyes dart down to them every now and then." She pushed his hands off her and got up. "Stand up, and I'll take care of you then. Lean against the tree if you have to."

The bodice and camisole hit the ground. Out in the crisp cool air were Ifartine's impressive breasts. Each was as big as a harvest pumpkin, and each was soft and jiggly, all just right.

Ifartine took her breasts into her arm, and from the pouches on her belt pulled a little vial of oil. She poured it down into her cleavage and all over her breasts, getting them both nice and slippery.

"You ready for this, Thax? You ready for my chest pussy?"

Thax nodded, making horsey puffing noises as he watched her get on her knees, positioning her bountiful baps on the tip of his rock hard horse cock.

She puuuuushed forward, letting the hot rod feel the pressure she was making, noting with a sense of pride that she was just big enough that Thax's entire stallionhood could be swallowed by her tits. She held them tight together, and soon didn't have to move as her beau started bucking, the tip coming out with each thrust to gently boop her muzzle.

"It never stops being cute just how much you like my breasts," she says teasingly, knowing Thax would probably not hear the message until a few minutes after they were done.

He wordlessly put his hands on her shoulders and started really going to town. Ifartine, not wanting a broken nose, opened her mouth and let his tip in, letting her fellatio add more sensation.

She wasn't going to lie, when he was like this, he scared her a little, but she was fond of all this energy he brought to bear.

After a few moments, she could taste precum, and knew if she didn't tap out, she wouldn't get her end of it. She let her breasts fall and started slapping his belly, their agreed upon signal to stop if she couldn't speak.

Thax seemed to snap out of whatever strange mutation of battle-madness had taken him. "Oh, oops, sorry!" He let go, while Ifartine took a few minutes to catch her breath.

"Just, you know it has to be outside. Now, are you ready to make it feel good for me, too?"

"Of course!"

She stood up, taking the vial of oil again. This time, she poured it in her hand and massaged her crotch with it, spreading the oil both along her already very wet pussy and all in between her thighs. This done, she put her hands on the tree and leaned herself out, tail raised.

"Remember, Thax, just between my thighs. Don't stick it in."

"Okay."

She wouldn't let him. Not yet. It was custom in the village that you don't put it in until your wedding day. However, the village was also sensible, and turned a blind eye to anything that wasn't inside.

What good was a honeymoon if neither bride nor groom knew what was going on?

Thax grabbed hold of Ifartine's ample hips, positioning his throbbing cock into the little triangle made by her mound and her thighs. One thrust and it was there, in that trough. He started thrusting.

Ifartine started to moan loudly. Of all the outercourse they enjoyed, this was the best. His rod massaged her clit with every thrust, only helped by the feel of it rubbing against her lips, too.

This was their favorite. It was nearly all the fun of penetration without any of the risks.

The sound of Thax's pelvis smacking Ifartine's thick butt seemed to echo into the air, just overcoming Ifartine's moaning in loudness. Thax's equine snorts and other feral noises came close.

Where she could think straight, Ifartine was very thankful that Thax was as hung as he was, so he couldn't accidentally slip in. This brief thought was quickly obliterated by the white hot feel of her orgasm. Her juices soaked his cock and her legs trembled at the force of it.

This pushed Thax over the edge, and he too came, the pleasure hitting him like a red hot poker directly to the center of the brain, his cock spraying a torrent of warm cum all over the tree trunk Ifartine was using for her support.

After the waves of pleasure died down, they leaned on eachother long enough to sit down on a dry side of the tree to catch their breath.

"Mmmm, thanks Thax. You know how to make me feel good..."

"Same for you."

They said nothing for a while, letting their breaths pant themselves back to normal, as they sat there and held hands.

They idly watched as they saw someone running up the road.

"I wonder what they're in a hurry for," Ifartine said.

Thax had a bad feeling. Whatever that running was, it couldn't be good.

A little while later, the village's temple horn blew, summoning all the village to meet at its door. Whatever this was for, they'd all have to attend.

Bringing up the rear, after a quick cleaning up, were Thax and Ifartine. They crowed in, trying to get a good vantage point to see just who'd come running and what their deal was.

It was Leff, a son of the village, one of many who'd gone looking for something, anything, that could help defend Tjordeaux from the marauding forces of Almakanti should they come.

"Steady on, Leff," the Village First Among Equals said, a reassuring hand on the returning son's shoulder. "Tell us what you saw."

Leff was a mule. There were a few donkeys in the village as well, and naturally there was some mixing. Nobody really made any big deal of it, so it didn't really come up, except the male mules were usually the ones who went to do dangerous jobs for the village, since they couldn't have children. Lest one think it's a cruelty, it's completely voluntary, and comes with a lot of honor.

"I got to where they say the Sessile Spear was kept," he started, once he'd gotten control of his nerves again. "It was already under Almakanti's control. The relic house was sacked. Nothing remained. I barely escaped with my life to tell you all this."

The Village First Among Equals gave him a reassuring pat. "You did your best, Leff. We're proud of you. Your family will be glad to have you alive safe and sound. Say, did you hear anything about the other sons of our village?"

Leff shook his head. "Nothing for most. I met Eril on the way back; he told me that the Tintinabulous Trident had been destroyed in an earthquake ten years ago. When we parted ways, he was looking for the Decaform Dagger."

The Village First Among Equals shook his head as he let Leff go with his family for some rest. "What an age this is. So much of what was before is now lost. Without some great weapon, I fear that we will be powerless to resist if Almakanti turns his great army towards us. We can merely take comfort that thus far we haven't merited his attention."

Bagar, the town's miller, made as if he were about to say something, but fell silent.

Thax was thoughtful, as usual. Soon, though, he thought he felt something speaking to him. If anybody were paying attention to him, they'd see that he had a look of some shock and fear on his face, but he swallowed, and he put up his hand.

The other village elders rolled their eyes. The Village First Among Elders reluctantly said, "Well, young Thax? Out with it."

"Sorry, um, just, what if we were to recover the Sword-Axe?"

There was a moment of silence before the meeting burst into laughter. The only ones not laughing were Thax, Ifartine, and the Village First Among Equals, who raised his hands to end the sonorous cacaphony of ridicule.

"The Sword-Axe? We never worked out just how that thing was supposed to work, and that's even assuming it's a real object, and not a creation of a very bored, very cretinous bard. And it's been lost for nearly a thousand years even if all the stories are true."

Thax mulled on this too. "But it's so powerful that evil people can't even touch it. That'd defend our village for sure, wouldn't it?"

The Village First Among Equals felt for the boy. His father was a good friend of his, but he never did like the boy. The way his daughter gravitated to him also irritated him to no end. What did she see in him, other than a willingness to not make fun of her for a name her mother, may she rest in peace, saddled her with.

Well, he was easy on the eyes, admittedly. But other than that, just what?

Then, the Village First Among Equals had an idea. A nasty idea. He had a nasty, horrible, terrible idea. He promptly mentally shamed himself for thinking it up, but really, it was only appropriate, wasn't it?

"Very well then. If you think the Sword-Axe is real and can save us, are you willing to go questing for it?"

"Daddy!" Ifartine cried with a shock.

The villagers murmurred.

Thax stood quietly and looked down at his hooves. After standing there, silent, for what seemed like eons, he looked up.

"I-I will then."

"Thax!"

The Village First Among Equals instantly regretted it. This boy? He spent so much of the seasons sneezing. And if you even got the livestock anywhere near him his eyes would swell up like balloons. And heights? The first and only time Thax had tried to climb a ladder he got to the first rung and promptly fainted.

Even if he did dislike the boy, it was far too cruel to ask him to do something like this.

"Are you sure you have to? I'm sure we can send someone else."

"N-no, you're right. I brought it up, didn't I. I- I should go."

Now the Village First Among Equals really felt like a heel. But Thax was insisting. In for a penny, in for a pound.

"Then you shall go, Thax Homebred, and find the Sword-Axe. For the sake of all of us. And you shall have the village's blessing. And, should you manage to come back alive," he paused for effect, "you shall have my blessing, too. You know what I mean." 

After sad goodbyes to his family and his dear Ifartine, Thax set off. He didn't have very much to go on, but he knew the last place the Sword-Axe had been seen was past Bleedwood Forest, somewhere in the Mountains of Petteritan.

His father had given him an axe and a sword to take along. He'd need both going traveling like he was. There were also provisions enough to last for a long while.

None of this comforted Thax in the least. He wondered what on earth had gotten into him to volunteer for a mission like this. Sure it was partly a sense of duty, but if it were that alone, he could easily have accepted the Village First Among Equals's suggestion to let somebody else go after it. He wondered why. He wondered just what the voice in his head somewhere was that had egged him on to do this.

Bleedwood forest was so called because the trees were of a kind whose sap was dark red and whose bark was easily damaged. The sap could be refined into a very tasty syrup, which was a delicacy in some places.

This fact floated into Thax's mind as he went through it. It made him feel a little better about traveling through the dangerous forest.

The roads here were pretty rough. Nobody seemed to travel along them as much as they had in days gone by. As he traveled, he tried very hard to ignore things along the way, like roadside graves and unburied skeletons of both people and beasts of burden.

He didn't do a very good job of it.

He walked he didn't know how far until suddenly, from out of the trees and brush covers came a huge scaly beast that towered over him. The eyes were red with black slit pupils. The face was long and riddled with sharp teeth. At the end of the long arms were vicious claws. The feet also had vicious claws. All of this was covered in strangely colorful scales and feathers.

A danger of the Bleedwood Forest, the Bleedwood Carnosaur! They ate meat! They ate people! And if Thax didn't do something, he felt from the very iron core of his being that it'd eat him too!

As he watched the beast emerge and sniff around, he felt like time had slowed to a glacial crawl. He racked his brain for everything he'd ever heard about carnosaurs. Did they only see movement? Did they track you by smell? Would they leave you alone if you left them alone?

He stood and watched as the thing suddenly looked his way. Chills ran down his spine. He had no idea what he was going to do. What could he do?

He and the Bleedwood Carnosaur looked at eachother for what felt like an eternity. Thax could feel his heart pounding in his chest. Was this it? Could this be the end?

Finally, the carnosaur looked away, sniffed the air, and scampered off, probably looking for prey with more meat on its bones.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Thax continued on his way. He got about three meters before he was blindsided by three tough looking people. A gator, a bear, and a bobcat all suddenly blocked his path.

"Hold up there," the bobcat said, holding a hand out. He looked to be the brains of this operation and the leader of this pack. "You might want to be careful, bud, this forest is very dangerous, as I'm sure you saw."

"Er, yes, Mr.?"

"Sussy, you can call me. The big guy's Bolls and the scaly gent is Agers. If you pay us a modest fee, we can accompany you safely through the rest of this forest to wherever you're going."

This could be a problem. The village hadn't actually given Thax any money. They didn't *have* any. They mostly bartered. He only really knew about money from books.

Trouble is, would these guys buy that?

"What fee is this?" he asked. "How much?"

"Well," Sussy sneered, "Can you really put a price on your safety?"

There was nothing for it, was there?

"I don't have any money. I'm afraid I'm going to have to face the peril alone."

"Aw, what a shame." Sussy drew a large knife, nearly a short sword. "Cause your peril just got that much more perilous!"

Bolls pulled out a hammer and  Agers pulled out some kind of blade on a stick that Thax had never seen before.

He'd never fought anyone seriously before, and he was about to have to take on three at once? He felt the fear set into him again, but he drew his sword.

The big lugs moved to dash towards the impudent equine, when suddenly Suss brought a finger to his lips and shushed loudly. Everyone stopped what they were doing, having been taken off guard by the sudden interruption.

They listened. Footsteps. Somebody was coming up the path the other way. Just one person, from the footsteps.

"Aren't you lucky?" the bobcat chuckled. "Looks like you've been saved from what your dumb decision would have brought you. Let's see if this one's any smarter than you are."

They broke, and Thax could see somebody coming. It was a figure in a simple tan dress and traveling cloak, carrying a basket in front of them. Not quite as tall as he was, he figured, and somewhat slighter. Whoever she was, he was sure she'd stand no chance against these brigands. His panicked brain tried to think about what to do. Should he shout some warning at her and risk being skewered? What could he do?

"Good morrow, gentlemen." The cloaked figure said, her keen voice betraying a strange accent that was like none Thax had ever heard before.

Suss turned around to return the stranger's greeting right back at her. Bolls and Agers, though, kept staring at Thax, their weapons still in hand, almost daring him to do something.

"Good morrow yourself, good lady. What brings you to these dangerous woods in such a dangerous time?"

"Why, I am going from town to town selling my fine wares."

"Ah, an entrepeneur! Then you know of the value of safety. We were just negotiating a fair price for our services with this gentleman before you arrived. I'm sure you'd be willing, yes?"

From what Thax could see of the stranger's face, there was a grin. A predator's grin, betraying the sharp teeth of a meat eater.

"Perhaps. I am afraid I don't carry gold with me, but I don't mind sharing my wares for safe passage."

Thax had to imagine the grin on Suss's face that accompanied the strange little dance he could see. "Ohohoho! And what wares would that be? Fine gems? Spices? Perfumes?"

The stranger's grin became very very wide here, like a waxing crescent moon with fangs across it.

"Dog treats."

With this, she opened the basket and thrust its contents at the brigands. Thax had to jump sideways to dodge it.

It was offal, and awful indeed. They were now covered head to toe in organs and juices. All three of the brigands turned to face the stranger now.

"You shouldn't have done that!" Suss cried very angrily. "I'm going to add *your* organs to the mix now, you impudent wench!"

Before the three could move, there was a very loud roar just behind the trees off the path. Another carnosaur!

The brigands quickly ran for it. Credit had to be given, they sure could move.

As they left, he heard Bolls roar at his boss, "What could possibly go wrong? That's what!"

And away they ran, with the befeathered carnosaur in hot pursuit.

The stranger approached Thax, who sheathed his sword. "Thank you. I don't know what I would have done."

The stranger looked Thax over. "You certainly don't. You look like you're fresh out of the village. What brings a homebody so far away from their home?"

The relief drained away. He wonder if he'd left the frying pan just to embrace the fire.

"I'm traveling to the Mountains of Petteritan."

"Petteritan? Are you, by chance, questing for the Sword-Axe?"

"How did y-hhh-" Thax sneezed loudly, then pulled a handkerchief from his effects.

"Gesundheit," the stranger said.

"Thanks," Thax replied, finishing with the handkerchief and putting it away. "How did you know I was after the Sword-Axe?"

"You just said it. Other than that, nobody goes there, anymore, except for questers for that legendary weapon, what few go there. However, you're in luck. I too am looking for it. If we work together, we'll find it faster."

"How do I know if I can trust you, when you won't even show your face?"

"Caution. Good. A bit late in showing that, but better late than never."

The stranger brought down her hood. She was a cat! Thax had never met one in person, but he'd read about them, certainly. Especially from the books that the travelling merchants kept in a box under their tables, that Thax had to carefully hide in various places.

This one had the red brown fur of good clay soil, with hair the color of dark stormclouds. Her eyes were yellow, with the slit pupils that are a feature of feline eyes.

"I'm Cut. Cut Lovingood. If you're going to live long enough to find the Sword Axe, you have a lot to learn."

"I really do. So you're looking for the Sword Axe too? And it's in the Mountains of Petteritan?"

"Yes. My people who sent me gave me a map to the very place. Nobody else knows where it is. There are many caves in those mountains. Some are natural caves. Other are abandoned mines. Only one holds the Sword Axe, however, and only I and my people know which cave it is. I feared having to find it alone, but I'm glad for help."

Thax nodded. "I want to be helpful as I can be."

"Then let's get moving before the carnosaurs come back. You drew a sword. Do you know how to use it?"

"My dad taught me how, but I've never truly  been in combat. The worst I've faced is overly rowdy drunk people and the occasional bad tempered grazersaur."

Cut gave him a look. "A shame, but it will have to do. I'm sure when the time is right you'll show how well you can do it. We may not be so lucky as to be near carnosaurs next time."

The two traveled together. The rest of the journey through the Bleedwood Forest was thankfully uneventful. They finally came out of the other side, where the plains before the Petteritan Mountains spread out  like the contours of a comfortable sheet, run through by clean clear rivers that flowed down from the springs in the mountains above.

It was next to one such river that they chose to make camp just before sunset.

Some hunting just before had netted them a couple of fine fowlsaurs that would roast up very nicely. Cut was truly impressed with Thax's skillful use of a bow here. Fowlsaurs moved very quickly, and most who hunted them had to resort to using very wide nets, or domesticate them on their own.

Either way, they made for a very filing meal. After everything they'd gone through getting to this, they were thankful.

"So why are you looking for the Sword Axe, Thax?" Cut asked her travelling companion.

"I come from a small village that Almakanti would just roll over if we didn't have it. We don't have enough people to defend it properly, but that weapon that evil can't even touch might help keep things in balance."

Cut thought about this for a while. "So instead of a couple dozen fighters, you'd have a couple dozen fighters *and* a legendary weapon. Against an army of thousands."

Thax blushed and looked away. "When you put it like that, it does sound stupid." He regained eye contact with her. "But we've been looking for more than just one weapon. We've had a bunch of our best looking for all kinds of legendary weapons. They've just proved to be really hard to find."

Cut shook her head. "What if I were to give you a better plan? The armies are led by Almakanti, but before he was their leader, they were a lot of independent tribes. If you were to take out Almakanti himself, the armies would quickly fall into infighting, and then your village wouldn't be in any danger whatsoever."

Thax thought about this. "What if the infighting has some bad effects all over the place? Like, a bunch of villages getting caught up between them and all?"

"If anything, those villages would be glad to have a lot of their people coming home again to get away from it."

Thax gave this some contemplation too. "Have you seen this Almakanti? I don't think I've ever seen a picture or heard what he looks like."

Cut paused, fiddling around with the fowlsaur bones before her. "I did, once. I didn't see his face. Nobody does. He wears an entire suit of black armor covering his entire body. They say nobody sees what he truly looks like except the servants that help him with his armor and bathing."

She sniffed. "Speaking of bathing, I think I could use a bath. You probably could too, couldn't you?"

"I don't have any soap though."

"Oh. Then you can use mine. I have more than enough for both of us. It has citrus oils."

"What's a citrus?"

"You really *are* fresh from the village, aren't you? Citrus is a family of fruits. Maybe one day you'll taste some. For now, you'll have to be content with the smell."

With this, she stood up and started stripping her clothes away. The cloak had long been taken off. The dress had joined it shortly after, and Thax had been surprised to see that Cut wore a seemingly skintight suit of leather armor. This she stripped off, piece by piece. The two bits of linen that served as her underwear swiftly came off, too, leaving her body bare. She was completely naked now. It was very hard for Thax to take his eyes off her as she removed the last few things she was wearing, the bits of jewelry that bound the hair that framed her face, and the other bit of jewelry that put her hair in a ponytail.

Thax himself was naked now too. Woolen vest, linen shirt, trousers, and loincloth all fell to the ground. Cut could appreciate his body as well. Living in a village certainly knew how to tone one's body. And naturally, as a horse, he's hung like one, which also got Cut's interest.

Cut retrieved a glass bottle from her things. Inside was a transparent viscous amber tinged fluid. When she removed the stopper, the smell wafted into the air. Thax could smell it, and it did smell very delightful. Whatever that citrus stuff was, if it smelled like that, he really wanted to taste it. Though he wasn't clear on how the soap was liquid like that. The only soap he knew was in the shape of solid bars.

Cut stepped into the river, which was nicely cool without being freezing cold. This was a relief; she didn't want to try to work out the portable bathtub she'd bought somewhere. "Come here, Thax, bathe with me."

Thax felt like he should pinch himself. Without any intervention, he felt himself getting obviously excited. The widening of Cut's eyes as he approached was testament to the effect.

"My my. Tell me, Thax, have you been with a woman before?"

"Sort of. I have, but not in the way that usually counts."

This had Cut's interest. "Mm, well, why don't we start with lathering eachother up?"

Thax approached, ready to rub all that lather up all over her, but was stopped. Before he could get close enough, his cock bumped against the small of her back.

"That's what I think it is, isn't it?"

"Yeah..."

"You know what, why don't you turn around, Thax, and I'll do you first?"

"Yeha, that might work better in my current state."

She splashed the both of them thoroughly wet with water. This amazingly did nothing to diminish the horse guy's rock solid erection. Cut tried to hold back from just directly grabbing it as she lathered up both herself and her partner.

As she did, she felt his body all over. There were muscles, plenty, but he wasn't overly ripped. She lingered longingly over his chest and his abs. Those were ones she'd love to lie against, feel her breasts smushed against. Maybe even lick. She briefly wondered whether her somewhat rough tongue would be a problem there.

His thighs... man, his thighs. Thighs were something she did look for on a guy, and did Thax ever have them. She could tell he did a lot of running.

She came back up to his butt, which was both soft and tight. She didn't often see such butts on guys, but she appreciated it. Then her hands slid forward to his amazing stallionhood. Those balls, like lemons! That cock! It had to be almost as long as her forearm.

Feeling all of this as she washed him, and the little sounds he made as she did it, was really starting to turn her on.

She took hold of his cock from behind and started rubbing it, the soap slicking up her hands enough to make it nice and smooth.

"Nnhh, Cut, I-I think you washed that part already" Thax moaned

"You've got to be nice and thorough when you're traveling. Get it very, very clean~" She replied.

"Oooh, if you're sure."

She was. She was very sure about that cock. This guy was going to be very, very fun to travel with.

She slipped a hand away from his cock, still covered with lather, and started rubbing his butt again.

"Hey Thax, want to make a deal?"

"Mhh, what's that?"

"If I can make you cum in the next minute, will you make me cum?"

"I'd do it either way, but go for it."

"Mmmm, okay."

She searched around until her finger found Thax's tight tailhole. It didn't feel like it'd ever taken anything before. She pressed against it, still stroking Thax's great horse cock.

"Cut, what are you doing?"

"Don't worry, you'll love this."

In the finger slipped.

"Hoob! Aaah, why are you- hwoaah!"

Cut's finger searched around within Thax, until she finally found the spot she was searching for.

Thax cried out in surprise and pleasure as the hardest orgasm he'd ever had smacked him like a red hot sledgehammer. His equine cock shot four or five huge, thick ropy torrents of cum. If he could think, he'd probably be hoping nobody was drinking this water downstream.

"Holy shit," Thax panted as his cock started to soften, "what did you do to me?"

"Ever heard of a prostate? Every guy has them, and they can be like having an orgasm button."

"Well, next time you try something with my butt, can you warn me next time?"

"Sorry. But at least now you can wash me without your cock getting in the way. At least for a few minutes."

Thax nodded. That was a very good trade.

Once he was rinsed off, he took the glass bottle from the shore. "Go easy on that," Cut said, "You only need a little. It's concentrated. It's also hard to get a hold of."

He poored just a little bit in his hands, and rubbed them together to work up a lather. He started with Cut's hair and shoulders, because a good bath can't all be an excuse for groping. He heard Cut making approving sounds, even humming a little bit, as he massaged the soap in.

"Has anybody told you that you have very good hands, Thax?"

"Yeah, actually."

"You'll have to tell me about the girl you have at home sometime."

"How did you know about that?"

"Call it intuition. Now why don't you be a dear and wash my back?"

He does. His hands go up and down Cut's back, lathering it up. The thrill of touching her body doesn't wear off very easily, and he can feel himself starting to get excited again. Better work quickly then.

His hands move around to the front of her body. He feels her breasts, which are perfect. Sure, Ifartines were nice and big, but Cut's were great, just barely over a handfull each. He wanted to linger on them for as long as he could, but he knew a better prize would be his if he waited.

Down his hands went, to her taut belly. He wished he were in front of a mirror with her, just so he could look at it while he was touching it. The midriff was such a sensual part of the body that he just couldn't resist.

His hands went down, briefly threatening to go for the gold before veering off to her thighs. Cut may have liked thighs, but Thax *loved* thighs, and Cut had a very nice pair. They were just the perfect size and shape for being very pleasureful. His hands caressed them on the outside and ran up them inside.

"Nnhh, just like that. You have a way with your hands," Cut cooed.

His hands then strayed up to her ample ass, which was indeed a lovely rump. Very shapely, just the right amount of jiggle. He gave it a little smack, to Cut's giggles. The way they rippled just right was incredible.

Finally he pulled her really close, his cock rubbing up agaist her back, as he finally started cleaning her undercarriage. Low moans escaped her mouth as he massaged and played with and fingered her pussy.

"Ooohh, you have such magic fingers, Thax."

Thax was reaching the threshhold where he was so horny and in the zone that he couldn't speak coherently. He just grinded against her while he played with her.

"You said before you weren't a man in one way... mmh... do you want to be?"

"Mmmhmm" was all he could manage.

"Then let go for a moment."

He managed to. After a quick rinse, Cut laid back on a stone in the river bed and spread her legs wide open. With a pair of fingers, she spread her pussy, nice and open for Thax to see in the twilight.

"Come on, Thax. Let me make you a man. Put it in me."

Thax practically made the water boil with how fast he ran to her. He grabbed her thighs and rubbed his huge cock against her cunny and belly a few times before he got his head enough under control to guide the tip to her lips.

"Okay, Thax, now just take it slAAAAAAUUUGHNN!"

One smooth thrust and it was all in. Even in his red mist sex rage state, he was amazed she could hold it all. But he was on another level. He was elated.

He wanted his first time to be with Ifartine, sure, but here it was. He was inside, at long last.

He pulled back, feeling Cut's cunny just milking and sucking on his dick, the amazing tightness and sensation blowing him away with each thrust.

Cut's pleasure at Thax's pounding was melting her brain. Whenever she tried to speak, nothing but nonsense came out. The tip tapping against her cervix just wouldn't let her think at all.

She'd had a few guys, before, sure, and they'd been great. Thax Homebred was just on a completely different level from them.

Thax opened her legs wider and let go, pulling her in closer so he could see her face more clearly through the red clouds as he thrust deeper and faster. Foam was forming around his mouth from the exertion. This was too much for either of them to handle.

It was at this point that Cut felt the first orgasm of the night. She felt herself shivering as she squirted all over Thax's cock and legs.

All this spasming quickly hastened Thax's own. Cut was so very glad, once she was able to string coherent thoughts together again, that she'd already gotten him off once outside of her, because the load he blew in her this time was prodigious. All to quickly she felt the heat of his virulent stallion sperm building up in her belly.

He collapsed next to her, cock slipping out as he did, the fountain of cum afterwards careening down the rock, into the river and out to the sea.

For a while, both of them laid there, panting, desperately trying to get their breaths back. The twilight became night, and the stars swirled overhead.

"Thax?" Cut finally said when she was able to form words.

"Yes Cut?"

"Enjoy not being a technical virgin anymore?"

"Yeah. Don't feel that different now. It was fun losing it though."

"Next time, it's anal."

"Never done that before either."

"It's a good thing this isn't some erotic story. I'd be pregnant for sure from you coming inside me like that."

"Yeah"

"It's like a one in five shot, the odds."

"Yeah?"

"Read it in a book once. It's true."

The two laid there for a while, their breaths almost back.

"Okay, want to bathe for real now so we can get some sleep?"

"Sure, Cut."

And the two did finish bathing, and it was a considerable show of restraint that they actually made it back to the campfire before having another quick go.

Morning came, and they left. After a few days' journey, they finally came to the village at the foot of the mountains, which was the venturing off point for what few up to now had been madmen who still quested for such an ignominious and fairly slandered relic as the Sword Axe.

The village didn't mind, and played it up, much to Cut's amusement and Thax's dismay. Everywhere, various ideas about just what the artifact looked like cluttered up every banner and wall in the place. Sword Axe creations were in all the childrens' hands as they ran up and down playing the "brave hero" games most kids did.

"Did you ever play stuff like that, Cut? I know I did."

"Not really. I wouldn't have had the time, between all the other things I did back then. Don't really want to talk about it though."

They stopped into the Inn of the Sword Axe, which of course was themed around that. Pastiches of heroic tapestries and paintings were all around. They secured lodgings for the night, and a table for a good dinner.

At the table, the two sat, Cut with a sparkling drink and Thax with a fruity drink, looking at an old map that Cut spread out before them.

"So this map shows all the mines and caves, and shows you which one the Sword Axe lays in, right?" Thax asked.

"Right," Cut replied. "The mountains can certainly change in a thousand years, but there are a series of landmarks that don't that we can depend on. Also we've been sending scouts every so often incognito to make sure our maps are up to date."

Thax meditated on this for a while. "Cut, just who is this 'we' you've been referring to? I've wondered since we met."

Cut looked Thax directly in the face. "It's better that you don't know. I'm sorry. I can't tell you, for both our sakes."

Thax nodded. This made a lot of sense. In the books and stories that'd come his way in the village, he heard all the time about secret societies and the like who worked in the background in an ongoing struggle between good and evil.

"So what can we expect when we get to the place?" Thax asked, setting down the heavy clay tankard of fruity juice. "I bet the Sword Axe is heavily guarded by all kinds of traps and monsters and stuff to keep the forces of evil away from it."

Cut shook her head. "I don't know. Nobody's actually entered it since it was put there almost a thousand years ago. The entrance is sealed; it blends in with the rest of the mountain. We'll first have to figure out how to get the door open. After that, who knows? But we can do it. We totally can!"

Thax took comfort in how certain she seemed to be on this.

After the meal, they took to their day of rest before the meat of the quest would be continued tomorrow. Thax wanted to see the sights and museums in the town. The idea of museums was also one that came to him via books and stories, since back home anything old that could still be used found use. They couldn't afford to stick anything under a glass box with a placard in front telling what it is. Furniture tended to be handed down over the years, as did clothes in one way or another. Robes and dresses became shirts, which became rags, which became buttons, which became kindling for the fire, over a long stretch of decades, possibly centuries.

So seeing things from the past so heavily curated was fascinating. Very little he could think of from his own village came down so unchanged.

They were so fascinating to him, in fact, that he didn't even think to question whether it really was the legendary knight's armor or the wizard's actual staff, knob on the end aside.

Cut would accompany him on occasion, but often wandered off to take care of "business". Thax didn't question this. Doubtless she was collecting information and doing really smart things to make tomorrow a bit easier on them.

As he wandered the town to look for other things to do or look at, he saw a sign that said "Hero's Springs". Taking it in with all the accompanying imagery, he could only conclude this was a set of hot springs. He stared at the sign, though. Shouldn't it be "Heroes' Springs"? Or did some former hero own them? What was the story there?

He shook his head and decided to go in. He could use a nice warm soak this late in autumn, after all.

As he went in, he saw that it was indeed a hot springs, fed by the natural thermally heated water from the mountain springs. And as he turned to the front desk, sure enough, there was a guy there that looked like he'd had a long life of adventuring in back of him.

"Welcome to my hot springs," the gruff guy said. "Here for a soak? Three crowns. Got a locker for your stuff and everything."

Thax had a hard time getting his head around currency. Cut had explained to him how it worked. The coins stood for something that its metal alone didn't. It was like a tally agreeing that you'd given that much value to somebody else? He didn't really understand. It did seem easier than bartering, though.

He put three faux-gold coins onto the counter.

The guy examined them, and once accepting they were real, put them in with a bunch of others. "Alright. Put your weapons and stuff up here, and I'll put them up in the safe. They'll be perfectly fine when you're done. Here's a chitty for them; don't lose it! And don't forget to have a complementary bottle of our refreshing Milk Juice after you're done. Here's a basket for your clothes. The racks are over there next to the door."

Sure enough, Thax stripped and placed his remaining clothes and effects into the basket, and made a note to remember just which nook on the shelf he put his clothes into. He stepped in.

There weren't that many people here today. He wondered whether there were that many people around any day. He remembered that with this style bath, he had to get clean before he had a good long soak. It felt to him like that was ass backwards, but he didn't mind all that much. The hot water would be worth it.

There was a bucket of water and a stool. There was also soap, in a convenient wax paper sachet that told him it hadn't been used before.

He dunked the water over himself. This was the custom; he'd read from one of the many books that came this way that this was how you started. The cool water was bracing, and would make the coming hot water all the better. He grabbed the soap and lathered himself all over. This soap was nice. It had the scent of cedar, and was probably made with the trees near the village.

As soon as he was finished soaping and rinsing off, he was ready to head for the hot springs themselves. He saw that there were only three there already, relaxing and soaking.

The first was a cat, if only because he lacked the stripes to be the tiger or the mane to be a lion. Thax had never seen a cat get that big. A few scars marked his body, which was big and muscular. He looked right back at Thax, returning the gazes sent his way with interest.

The second was a dog. This one had the look of being indoors a lot. The thin, lithe body was't one that did much hard work, not of the pysical kinds anyway, nor did it look like he got out into the sun much.

Thax had read about wizards. This one looked like he fit the bill. There was a lot appealing there. Now that he looked closer, there seemed to be little bits of writing on his body in languages that he couldn't understand. He seemed to be dozing off.

The third was a goat gentleman. Gentleman seemed to be the best way, what with how he was fastidiously clipped. In musculature and general build he was somewhere between the two previous men.

The odd thing, to Thax, was that nothing seemed to stand out about him. This was very unsettling. Even with normal, ordinary people, *something* stood out about them. This guy? He could easily disappear into a crowd, if he wanted to.

They all looked at Thax expectantly.

"Hey there," he said, waving as he slowly stepped into the hot water.

"Welcome, buddy," the big cat said. "Enjoying the water with us today, are you?"

"It is good and hot. I'm Thax, by the way. Thax Homebred. Who are you guys?"

"That's a pretty unique name," the big cat said. "I'm Malk. These over here are my buddies. The one in danger of falling asleep is Manin, and that guy over there is Evrin."

Evrin gave a quiet nod.

"So what brings you to this place, Thax?" Malk said, his voice smooth as silk.

"I wanted to see the sites. I'm going to go exploring the mountains tomorrow."

"Is that right? Well, we just came back from there. It's pretty dull. There's not a lot to see there. We went there looking for the Sword Axe. Every group of heroes does at one point or another. It's always good to get out in the fresh air."

At this point, Manin started to come out of his daze. "ooh, I see we have a guest! And he's pretty easy on the eyes!"

"That he is," Malk replied. "Say, why don't you come over here between us? The water's a bit better over here. Just a fair warning, we might get a little touchy."

Thax blushed. There were a lot of times back in the village where he tusseled with other guys, did some dares, that kind of thing. He never got the nerve to go any further, and then Ifartine became his girl. But he did have a craving, and here was his chance.

"Touchy? I hope you do!" Thax replied, getting up and making his way over. The moment he took his place between them, Malk put his arm around him. This felt good. He enjoyed the relaxedness and closeness of everything.

In fact, he was getting far too comfortable. Slowly rising out of the water was a sea monster. Malk and Manin gazed with admiration as Thax's cock breeched the water. Manin especially was practically drooling at its sudden appearance.

"See?" Malk said with a wide kitty grin, "I knew you'd like this. But just sitting and soaking is kinda boring, isn't it? Want to get more hands on?"

"Do I? Yeah!" Thax said excitedly.

Before he knew it, Manin was between his legs, licking up and down his equine cock, excited for it, very excited, his long tongue feeling great all over his length.

"His mouth is great, isn't it?" Malk asked, as Manin started to struggle to take the horse cock into his maw.

"Yeah. If he's as good with his mouth as he is with spells, he must be a great wizard."

"He's certainly a wizard at using his mouth, in any case."

Without much more words, Malk took Thax's hand and moved it down, to where he felt the cat's own throbbing erection. Like everything else about this cat, it was large.

Understanding the unspoken request, Thax started rubbing it, gently, while Manin showed himself to indeed be a mouth wizard as he took the horse's entire cock down to the hilt.

"You haven't really done this before, have you?" Malk asked.

"Sorry," Thax replied self consciously.

"It's okay, you're not doing bad. I can tell you're not that experienced with guys. But I'm in a really good mood. You can get all the practice you want with me and my friends."

"Thanks. I love it."

"I bet. Want your first lesson now?"

It was very hard to think of anything with a cute doggo milking your cock, but his entire being was a shouting, shining ball of yes.

"Good." Malk got out of the water, not without a little shivering, and straddled Thax, presenting his hard feline cock right in front of him. "Want to try to suck this?"

Thax indeed wanted to try to suck it. He'd never actually messed with a cock other than his own before, and this guy's cock was quite different from his. It wasn't as big as his, but still big, a long cylinder tapering out to a point, with strange little barb looking things around the base of the tip.

As for the other part of the equation, Thax had never used his mouth on an erection either. He wasn't quite flexible enough to try it out on himself, though with enough limberness and stretching he could probably do it.

What he did know, he'd read from books. They weren't quite as good as experience, but they were much better than nothing.

He took the kitty cock into his mouth. He was very careful not to let his teeth brush against it, and used his tongue to rub it up and down as he applied varying amounts of suction.

Purrs of delight were telling him that he was doing it right. He took a strange amount of pride in this. He tries taking Malk's cock in deeper, struggling not to trigger his gag reflex.

"Struggling?" Malk cooed. "Don't try to take too much in at once. You're doing just fine."

Thax accepts his suggestion, limiting himself to just the amount of cock he could comfortably handle. Meantime, he brought his hand up and started gently squeezing and massaging the kitty guy's nice, big, pendulous balls.

Remembering his night with Cut, he tentatively circled a finger around Malk's tailhole.

"Whoa, hold on there. Nothing in that hole, okay?" Malk said.

The finger moved instead to his taint, applying pressure.

"That's better. It's the thought that counts. Oooh, you're doing good."

Meanwhile, Manin continued his own careful attention to Thax's equine erection. The good doggo was wagging his tail as he tasted the pre going down his gullet.

Thax thought about how to warn him that the upcoming torrents might just be a bit too much for him while his own mouth was full of cat cock, but anything he could think of involved use of his hands, which were also busy. There was nothing for it but to give him gentle taps with his knees and hope that got the message across.

Just before he reached his peak from Manin's attentions, he looked sidelong at the goat gentleman, Evrin. He had turned to watch. His own thick erection was in his hands. He was clearly enjoying the show.

For a reason that Thax couldn't put a finger to, he found that having an audience just made things that much more fun.

With this, he felt the doggo boy pull off his cock just in time to avoid having what felt like a gallon of hot horse boy spunk sent straight down his gullet, the huge ropes of it sailing clear across the hot spring and hitting the side of the  building beyond, making quite the mess.

Evrin gave a wide eyed nod of approval. Manin looked behind him and was glad he'd interpreted his equine partner's conversations correctly.

Suddenly though, Thax found that Malk had put his hands behind his own head, and had started thrusting into his face. Before he could react, a good bit of kitty spunk ran down his own throat, one sqirt, then another.

His hands stopped what they had been doing and slapped against the cat warrior's thighs as a signal.

"Whoops, sorry, got carried away," he said and quickly dismounted off to one side, while Thax coughed and sputtered, trying not to gag from the sudden, unforewarned orgasm.

"Are you okay?" Malk asked, while the kitty wizard Manin pulled himself back up next to Thax and gave soothing cuddles.

"*Kaff kaff pant* I'm fine, but I could have used some warning."

Manin suddenly got onto Thax's lap, and started grinding against him, getting that horse boy member excited again. "I can make it up to you if you want," he said coyly, tail wagging, obviously a very excited doggo.

"Sure, why not? But what about your friend over there?"

"Oh, Evrin?" Malk asked. "Don't mind him. He's happy. He likes to watch."

"Say," Manin interjected, hopping off Thax and leaning against the side of the springs next to him, wiggling his butt. "Why don't you get yourself inside me, while Malk gets into that cute butt of yours."

Thax again thought back to when Cut had experimented with him back there. He *had* liked the sensation, but was he ready to take anything back there more than a finger?

His loins cast the deciding vote. "Sounds like fun. Do you have any oil?"

"Plenty!" Malk gave him the bottle, and Thax applied a liberal amount to both his own now fully hardened rod and onto Manin's cute tailhole. As he passed the bottle back, he pressed his tip against its waiting reception. The anticipation was making his heart pound.

Slowly in it went, and the first thing that struck him was the tightness. Nothing else had felt like this before. Not even his own hand had treated him like this before. It was like a vice, but in a pleasant way.

The plush butt certainly helped. He had to go a good few inches before he reached the meat of it. And the way he was being milked now, this was quite a winner of a doggo boy.

As he started thrusting, he suddenly felt a hand applying oil to his own rear. The sudden anticipation made the thrusts he was giving all that much sweeter. He then felt a pair of strong hands on his hips, halting his thrusts for just a moment, which was well and good for him.

The tip came first, and he was thankful for the tip being so narrow. Slowly, bit by bit, he felt the cat cock enter him. Once the head was all in, the little barbs started making themselves felt against his inner walls. The oil was doing wonders to make sure it didn't hurt that badly, but there was still the texture. This was a lot of stimulation even before it started pressing around the sweet spot Cut had discovered what felt like ages ago. It was almost too much for him to take all at once.

"Need a moment?" Malk asked in a low murmur in Thax's ear. Unable to say anything, the horse boy gave a nod.

As he took a moment to get used to the cock in him, he felt Manin start pushing himself around on his own rod. He idly wondered how much it'd take for him to get as comfortable with this as the doggo seemed to be.

"Okay, I think I'm ready for you to move now," Thax said. "Take it slow, okay?"

"No sweat, rookie," the cat said, and started to slowly draw back before pushing forward again, starting a good, slow but strong rhythm.

Thax matched this, bouncing himself back and forth between taking Malk's cock and thrusting into Manin's ass. He found himself enjoying this quite a bit. Pleasure from two different sources... he was in heaven.

He decided to bend forward, not only to let Malk in deeper, but to get a good feel of Manin, and maybe even give him some pleasure from the front as well.

He was slender, and his body was good to the touch. His hands went down to reach for his cock. They found his doggie member, and found it was probably a good thing Manin enjoyed being a bottom.

It wasn't *small*, per se. It was just very average. What you'd expect. Even so, the shape of the canine cock on him was a lot of fun to feel, what with its curves and bulges. Even now, as he massaged the member while keeping up the back and forth  rack of pendulum motion between them, he could feel the knot start to form.

"You getting close?" Thax asked, barely able to think with the attention he was getting from both sides, and in the affirmative of that himself.

"Uh huh," Manin responded, looking back at Thax, making eye contact.

Thax nodded and started really rubbing the doggo down, until finally he felt him clench as the mage was the first to orgasm, his doggy cock shooting a fine fountain of white right into the rocks that lined the side of the water.

Thax waited for the orgiastic moans to die down, then pushed Manin forward to pull him off of his cock, which he took in his own hands now. "I'm close too. Where do you want it?"

Manin recovered enough to turn around, bright eyed, arms up in almost a canine begging stance. "Cum on my chest, Thax. I want you to get it all over me!"

Thax nodded and let his head back as the first spurt plastered itself on the doggy's fine chest, followed by the second, and then the third, streaming down his collarbone, down past the nipples, down the abs, into and out of his bellybutton. It was pleasureful imagery to go along with  what he was feeling.

"What about you, horsey?" Malk was saying in a low tone as he thrust. He was being rougher now, and Thax not noticing was a good sign of how much he was really enjoying it.

"Paint a stripe on my back, Malkie" Thax panted.

"Don't call me that again," Malk grunted for a moment, before getting enough control of himself to pull out. Seconds later, the stream of hot kitty spunk worked its way right up Thax's back, right between his shoulder blades, then down the small of his back.

As he started to ease himself back into the water in the afterglow, he could see the goat gentleman Evrin finishing himself off, getting his cum all over himself, painting his own chest and belly with his cum. What a perfect punctuation to this scene.

Moments later, after a good cleansing and retrieving their effects, the four were dressed and sipping nice cold bottles of milky juice, which was refreshing after all that work.

"So where will you three go now?" Thax asked.

"We're going to stay here for a few days," Malk replied, "really unwind. Then we're going to see if we can't find the Effervescent Earspoon."

Thax blinked. "Earspoon? What's an earspoon?"

"It's a kind of spear," Manin said without looking up or missing a beat.

"I'd better get back before Cut comes looking for me. Thanks. Thanks for all of that."

"You're welcome," Malk replied. "See you again, Thax Homebred. Let us know if you find the Sword Axe."

And with that, he left the company of his three new friends into the setting afternoon sun.

Soon, it was morning. Thax and Cut had gone to bed last night pretty quickly. He'd wondered just what she'd done that'd tired her out, but didn't really make much of it. When he awoke, she was still next to him in the bed they were sharing.

He dressed. Slinging the sword and axe his father had given him back on, he wondered whether Cut had any weapons on her. He'd figured she must have *something*, with a name like Cut. He moved to take a quick look at her things before a sudden big yawn stopped him in his tracks.

"Morning, Cut! Sleep well?"

Cut smacked her mouth and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. "Yeah." She scratched herself, then went looking for her clothes.

"So what did you get up to yesterday?" she asked as she started slipping her freshly cleaned undergarments and leather armor on.

"I went to the hot springs. Met some new friends."

"That's all fine. You should be more careful, though. You never know whether somebody will be an agent of Almakanti or not."

"These guys were fine. Besides, it was just hot springs. What about you? What did you get up to that had you so exhausted?"

"Oh, me? Exercise. Practice. Can't get too rusty."

Thax had his pack ready. "I've been meaning to ask, Cut. Are you armed?"

"Of course I am. I'd be crazy not to be. I'll show you once we're out of town."

And an hour later, after a good breakfast that featured good coffee (Cut drank hers black, while Thax had milk and two sugars in his.), they were on the trail, heading up the Mountains of Petteritan.

The mountain pass they went along for a while was a thoroughfare of trade in the past, before the great mountain tunnel trains had punched right through the mountains and made an even easier entry for goods and people.

There was the occasional tree, but other than that the mountains were quite sparse. Sometimes they'd even find the remains of a campsite that didn't see much use anymore, or the odd abandoned connestoga wagon.

Cut had her map open, comparing it to what she could see.

"About how far is it now?" asked Thax, feeling his legs starting to burn from all the walking.

"Five minutes fewer than the last time you asked," Cut responded. "Don't worry, once we turn off the main road, things are going to get much more interesting, very fast."

"I hope so. The view's nice, at least."

"So, before we reach the cave, there's three passes we have to worry about." Cut started, deciding strategy talk would make the travel time pass just that much faster.

"What are those?"

"The first one's easy enough. The Bridge of Determination. It's a natural stone bridge between two mountain peaks. It's two people's widths across at widest point, but some careful stepping will- what is it? You're pale as a sheet"

Thax had completely stopped. There was silence, save for the breeze blowing through the gully.

"Heights." Thax finally said, "I can't do heights. This mountain's bad enough already; at least I have solid stone under my feet all around."

"Well, you're going to have to face your fears. That bridge is the only way to get to the Sword Axe. Are you going to go home to your village and tell them you couldn't get it because it was behind a bridge?"

It occurred to Cut, a bit too late, that this might be laying it on just a bit too thick. Thax looked back to the way he came. They were far up enough that they could see the outer edges of the Bleedwood Forest now. Tjordeaux was out of sight over the horizon, but she knew that's where Thax was looking, without fail.

"All I want now is to go back at all." He took a moment to steady himself. "Not empty handed though."

Thax started walking again, prompting Cut to start as well. After a few moments, Thax spoke up again. "So after that bridge, what's the next one?"

Cut consulted her notes that she surreptitiously had out with the map. "Next is the Pass of Beasts. That wasn't one of the original ones, but a creature of some kind has staked out a life there. If we can't go around it, we'll have to go through it."

"Another thing I'm not in a hurry to meet, but at least it's not heights. Then what?"

"All that's left then is finding the door. I don't have anything on that, so we'll have to play it by ear when we get there."

"So you think it'll be camof- who are those people!?"

Cut looked up from her map, which she put quickly away, as suddenly, four people came swiftly up the road on ridesaurs! They bore a black flag with a pink blossom on them. This could only mean one thing.

"Almakanti's scouts! I knew it was only a matter of time before they found us!"

Thax drew his sword. This was just what they needed. "Do I at least get to see now why you call yourself cut?"

She pulled a pair of objects he couldn't quite see from her belts and wielded them. They looked a bit like largish knives. "Hah, yeah, that you do. We'll cut them down to size before they have a chance to get word back!"

The ridebeasts, with their short practical feathers being blown in the gully breeze, opened their sharptoothed maws for chill-rendering screams as their riders fast approached, their two-legged raptor gait carrying them at great speed.

Like a big league ball player, Cut wound up for a hell of a pitch and threw the strange weapons, one right after the other, at the approaching scouts. As they flew, they came open, and Thax realized right away just what they were. He suddenly had a manic, newfound respect for the expert thievy kitty girl.

They were scissors.

They flew right at the ridersaurs, managing to strike the straps holding on their saddles. Two scouts slid off, hitting their heads on the ground and getting knocked unconscious, their riderless ridersaurs buggering off somewhere else now that they were free of their masters.

While Thax was looking at this with amazement in his eyes, a sudden noise made him look back at Cut, who'd just caught her scissors again.

"What on earth was-"

"Look out! In front of you!"

The other two ridersaurs bore down on Thax, their razor sharp teeth open and ready to tear, their riders coming with swords drawn. Thax wished, and not for the first time, that he was back at home in his home village of Tjordeaux, making horseshoes with his dad, or reading the latest books from the itinerate merchants with his mom.

As it was, he made like he was fainting before them, then swiped at the saddles with his sword as they both went by. The saddles fell off, but these scouts wouldn't be so easily dispatched as their friends had been.

Cut saw the two scouts brandishing their swords, and threw her scissors again. The sailing shears snipped right through their swords like they were made of paper. Seeing that their weapons were destroyed, they threw down the hilts and put their hands up in the internationally known gesture of surrender.

A coil of rope and a few minutes later, and the four scouts were all tied up together. Their legs were left unbound; Thax, against Cut's good advice and wishes, sent them walking back towards the town below that they'd come from.

"I couldn't just leave them there, Cut. It's heartless!"

Cut sighed. "You really are soft, village boy. Do you think they'd have done the same for us?"

"No. That's why we're better."

Cut shrugged. "So how did you like my weapons, then?"

Thax nodded. "Those were wild! What were those?"

Cut brandished them with a cheshire cat grin. "These are my babies. They're the Serrulate Scissors! They can cut through anything they're thrown at! And they always come back after I throw them."

"Legendary weapons!" Thax gasped. "Then why are you still so afraid of Almakanti? Why do you need the Sword Axe?"

The kitty girl sheathed the Serrulate Scissors. "Because, Thax, the weapons everyone looks for, the weapons of the Adjectival Arsenal, have limitations. These scissors can only cut through anything when they're thrown. When wielded, or used like normal scissors, they can only cut what a normal pair of scissors would cut. All of the Adjectival Arsenal weapons have these limitations. The Giddy Guisarme-Glaive can only be used by someone who constantly giggles. The Tintinabulous Trident will only pierce through everything while there are bells ringing. All of them have these limitations."

She put her hands on Thax's shoulders.

"The Sword Axe is special. It's set apart from every other relic weapon. Its power isn't bound to an adjective in its name, you see? It is the marriage of sword to axe, and it *has* no limitations. The only limits the Sword Axe has are the limits of the wielder. Do you understand, Thax Homebred?"

"I do, Cut Lovingood, I do."

"Then let's go! The Sword Axe waits for us."

The rest of the trip between there and the Bridge of Determination was thankfully uneventful. They saw no further scouts while on the main road, and when they finally turned off of it, other than being a steep climb, the rest of the path was fairly easy.

At long last, they reached a stone arch. Beyond that was the Bridge.

Cut hadn't been exaggerating when she said it was between peaks of the mountain. The bridge joined two of the high peaks of the Mountans of Petteritan. They weren't the tallest mountains, but at their height, they didn't need to be for a fall off of the bridge to be very, very fatal.

"So we have to go across this?" Thax said again, starting to shake from the nerves.

"We have to. There's no other way there. You can *do* this, Thax."

Thax gulped and approached the bridge. At its widest point, it was indeed wide enough for two people to stand on it. For like three inches. Then it narrowed to the point where anything other than a really straight walk forward within shoulder width would result in a long fall.

He took a first step, then a second. His heart was pounding. Sweat was building all over him.

Then he made the mistake of looking down. Down. Down! There were trees. There was a river. There was a metric ton of sharp spikey rocks. Even if you were really lucky, if you fell, you were dead dead *dead*.

The horse boy's eyes rolled into the back of his head, and he fainted dead away, thankfully falling backwards.

"THAX!" Cut shouted, and ran right for him. She hunched down and cradled his head on her knees while he slowly came back to consciousness.

"Cut..."
"Thax?"

"I looked down."

"Oh Thax..."

Thax was eventually able to get himself back up onto his unsteady hooves. "Sorry, Cut, I just can't. It's too high."

Cut knew she couldn't make him go across again. If he fainted and fell over the side...

An idea formed in her head. "Thax, hand me one of your handkerchiefs, would you?"

He did. She quickly took his hand and pulled him to the mouth of the bridge.

"Whoa, whoa, slow down!" Thax cried.

"We're not going over it yet, don't worry. So your problem with heights is seeing how high up you are, right?"

"Yeah. I can't even climb a ladder."

"Okay." She took the handkerchief and bound it around Thax's eyes, making a makeshift blindfold. "There, now seeing how high up you are won't be an issue!"

"But how am I going to walk across now?"

"You're going to love this, Thax. Put your arms around me."

He did, to find she'd turned around. He had his hands meeting around her waist.

"Hold onto me, Thax. I'll walk us both across. So long as you step in line with me and don't let go, we'll make it across."

He held her close, like he didn't want to let go.

Cut smiled. She was glad he couldn't see anything. She didn't want him to see her blush like a schoolgirl.

Together, they went across the bridge, step by step. Cut had no fear. She could easily walk something like this when it was just two inches off the ground. There's no reason that would be harder if it just happens to be higher, right?

She couldn't help but put her own hands on Thax's as they went across.  She could feel his body warmth all around, and he could feel hers in front of him. It was a very nice feeling.

Finally, after what seemed like ages, they made it across the Bridge of Determination. Cut waited until they were well on solid ground on the other side to say, "Okay, Thax, we're over."

Immediately his hands went from around her waist to on her breasts, giving them very gratuitious squeezes.

"Nfffh, ha ha, very funny, now cut it out so I can get that blindfold off you."

"Heh, sorry, couldn't resist."

"Why are you so brave on some things, and it's never the right things?"

Once the blindfold was off, the two continued on their trail. It was a bit rougher going now. The road's stones were shattered and uneven, time having worked their ravages on them. The trail weaved around the mountainside in a dizzying, drunken dance. Thax noted that the road was dotted on either side by granite posts every few bits of distance. Since this was the side of the mountain that caught the rain, some of their features were worn to near blank smoothness, but the ones that hadn't been were unsettling, to say the least.

"So Cut," Thax said, still unable to stop himself taking in all this around him, "you said there was some kind of beast ahead. Do you know anything about it?"

"No, not entirely. We only know it's there because we managed to see it from a distance. We couldn't really make it out."

And sure enough, they turned the corner, and here, in a little nook of the mountains, was a minijungle of verdant green. There must have been some kind of soil here that kept feeding its richness. As they went further in, the canopy of trees and tall plants all around, they noticed it was getting warmer and warmer. Was this little surprise garden on a thermal vent?

Cut drew her Serrulate Scissors. "Let's be ready. We have no idea what it is up here. It may be a carnosaur or even worse."

At this point, Cut decided to let Thax go ahead of her, since the undergrowth was getting thick, and his sword made a good makeshift machete. Also, if the foliage got too thick for that, he had an axe to rely on. While the Serrulate Scissors were super keen when thrown, they weren't so much when just used like normal scissors would be.

At last, when they thought they'd nearly gotten out of the minijungle to continue their road to the Sword Axe's resting place, they felt tremors. Tremors below their feet.

Cut swore. "And we were so close to getting through! I can feel it! It's in front of us!"

And looming out of the foliage was a great, huge beast! It stood on four legs the size of tree trunks, and had a head like a shield. Three pointy horns stuck out like overexaggerated spear points.

Thax blinked. "Oh! It's a Threepointsaur!"

Cut looked at Thax. "A what?"

"I read about them. They eat plants. So long as you don't mess with their children and try to eat them, they'll leave you alone."

The threepointsaur looked down at Thax, and to his total unnervement, he found that there was an intelligence behind those eyes.

Aw hell, Thax thought to himself, please don't talk and be some intelligent person who has a quest or some shit, please. Just be a dumb animal we can walk past.

"Greetings, oh heroes," the threepointsaur boomed in a deep voice.

Dammit! Thax internally screamed. Aloud, he said, "Oh hello. Nice weather today, isn't it?"

"Hi," Cut said. "Excuse me for not curtseying, I'm not wearing a dress. And I don't bow."

"You may do what you wish, oh heroes. I am but a quest giver, charged with making sure those who want the Sword Axe for evil do not obtain it."

Thax sheathed his sword. "But I thought those who were evil couldn't even touch it."

The threepointsaur nodded. "That is indeed true, but even knowing where the Sword Axe is, that knowledge alone is dangerous. It is enough to keep the weapon out of the hands of those who would wield it for good."

"Well then," Cut began, but then paused. "Do you have a name? It'd be awkward to just be all 'hey you' all the time."

The threepointsaur nodded. "I have no name, none that I can remember. But if you must call me something..." the creature lapsed into a rumbling silence, as if thinking about something like this was a herculean effort. "You may call me Janice."

"Ma'am." Thax bowed. "So what is the task you have in mind for us, Janice?"

"Please, follow me to the humble cave I call my home."

Cut stretched. "Could we ride there on your back, Janice? The trip here has been long, and we're very tired."

"Of course! That would be no trouble at all. Please, climb up."

They did, and Janice carried them along through the thick green of this jungle wedged into a mountain.

A good 15 minutes later, they at last came into a cave that was twice as tall as their huge friend. The inside of the cave, however, came as a surprise to them.

It was nicely furnished, with woven rugs and furniture and such that were sized for use by people. Much of it was made of wood and grass and the like, which would be very abundant here.

As they went in, Thax and Cut dismounted and walked alongside.

"I have arrived, Madam Manha, carrying questers."

They finally saw, when their eyes had adjusted from the brightness outside, that there was a figure, dressed in a robe and cloak, who was sitting at a table. They stood up. They were short; they'd only come up to Cut's chest.

"It's been long since we've had questers for the Sword Axe who made it past the Bridge of Determination," the figure said.

Thax made another bow. "Whatever the test is, Madam Manha, we are prepared."

The figure they'd called Madam Manha took off her cloak. She was a mouse. The shortness made a lot of sense.

"Now that you're here, I can get out of these. It's official, but it's still hot as all dickens."

Madam Manha also shed the robe, now down to what amounted to a woven tube top and loin cloth. Both of these she filled out modestly.

While she had the attention of Cut and especially Thax, she continued. "I went questing for the Sword Axe, some ten years ago, and I failed. As is custom, I stay here to administer the test here to other questers. Though it's also nice to have company. It's been lonely since the last guardian retired."

Cut gave the nod of one equal to another. "So show us this test. We need the Sword Axe to face a great evil."

Madam Manha was letting down her hair. At one point it had been black, but streaks of gray were entering it now. "This way, then."

They all went to the back of the cave. There was a thermal vent here, providing a nice bit of warmth in the cave. At last, in the back, there's a door. Using a key, Madam Manha opened it.

Within was a sight that confused Thax and made Cut roll her eyes.

There were three poles. Only one of them had anything on it. They were rings, ten big rings, arranged on the pole to the left, from largest on the bottom to smallest on top.

"Oh good," Cut said through grit teeth, "It's one of these. I *love* these."

Thax looked blankly at the setup. "So what is this? What am I looking at here?"

"This!" Madam Manha entoned, "This is the Test of Intellect! You must move all of the rings from the leftmost pole to the rightmost pole! The rules are, you may only move one at a time, and you may only put rings on top of bigger rings! The magic within them will prevent you from breaking the rules!"

"Yup, it's one of these stupid things." Cut walked right towards it. "I'll handle this, Thax, you chill out. See you in a few hours."

"I- uh, okay. You sure?"

"Thax, I like you a lot, but trust me, you'd only slow me down right now."

Madam Manha put a hand on Thax's shoulder. "Perhaps you'd like to accompany me for some tea while we wait?"

"I'll be with our hosts if you need me, Cut."

Cut didn't answer. She was already irritatedly moving rings from one pole to another.

Thax, Janice, and Madam Manha were back in the bigger cave, sitting around a table, all having tea. Janice's was in a big bowl in front of her, while the other two had them in very nice mugs that he'd learned Mahna had made herself. Apparently, guarding a cave for ten years left a lot of free time to learn hobbies with.

"So, what's that puzzle? Cut seemed really upset about it, whatever it was."

"Oh, that?" Manha said, then took a brief sip of her tea. "That's actually a test of character. Those who are evil tend to get impatient and try to cut the gordian knot, so to speak. Or try to fight us. Or try to run out."

"Oh?"

"It's not that difficult a puzzle. It just takes time to do. The wielder of the Sword Axe must be someone with many virtues, and as I'm sure you've heard, patience is one."

There was a lull in the conversation.

"So, Thax," Janice finally said, "You have no idea how nice it is to have a man for company again."

"Is it?"

"I became sentient. It's not something valued among the threepointsaurs. My herd became scared of me, but then I was led to this place, a thousand years ago. We live for a long, long time unless we are killed, which tends to be often."

"And I," Manha said, "Have been here only ten. It seems like a drop in the bucket as far as Janice is concerned, but as much as we enjoy each other's company, it just isn't the same, you know?"

"I can totally get that," Thax agreed.

"Then, could you do us a favor?" Madam Manha asked.

Thax felt like he knew where this was going. "Well, sure, I could."

Manha blushed. Janice didn't, but only because she was physically incapable of doing so.

"Could you... have sex with us? It's just been so long since we've felt the touch of a man. It's driving us crazy."

Thax started blushing too. "Sure, okay. But what about Janice?" He turned to her. "Do you think I'll be enough?"

"More than enough. Threepoinsaurs have tiny genitals for our size. I'm sure you will fit perfectly."

"In fact," Manha interjected, "Could you start with Janice? I'd like to watch a bit, first."

Thax thought for a moment. Had you told him last month that he'd be fucking a sentient saur as part of a quest for a holy weapon, he'd think it was a joke. Here he was about to do it. And not only did he not mind. He wanted to.

"Alright, let me get out of these, and we can get started!"

Expressions of joy and gratitude filled Manha and Janice's faces. Since Janice had no clothes to take off, she merely wandered away from the table a bit, her huge tail up, revealing that she wasn't kidding about the relative sizes. It'd be average size were it on a horse person like from Thax's home village. It was already soaking wet with anticipation.

Thax was nude, and the smells and atmosphere already had him hard and ready. Manha, totally nude, was reclining in her chair (which was thankfully made for it), already starting to rub herself to the show that would start any moment now.

As he got closer, he felt himself get hornier and hornier. He'd read about pheromones before, and he wondered whether this was why he felt like his head was floating as he approached Janine's pussy. He'd never really thought about any kind of beast as attractive before, but there was something about that lady that had him fascinated.

He got close to it, face to face with it, and found he couldn't resist the urge to start licking it. The noises he heard coming from his partner seemed to reverbarate through his body. The taste was indescribable. It had a flavor that was very unique, like nothing he'd ever tasted before. His mind felt like it was sinking into a nice warm pink bubblebath.

"That's the way, hero! Eat her pussy real good." Manha called out in the unmistaken tones of somebody enjoying herself. "She likes that!"

She was indeed liking it, but Thax just found himself really wanting to rut that. He pulled himself off and regained enough of his senses to make his mouth make words again.

"I want to put it inside you. Are you ready, Janine?"

"More ready than I ever have been. Mate me, Thax!"

He didn't need to be told twice. He guided his thick horse cock to the threepointsaur's waiting cunny, rubbing it around in her juices before finally sliding it all in.

Cut, still in the testing room, had managed to halfway fill a pole with rings, before being suddenly interrupted by a very loud sound, like a vuvuzela being blown into a submarine as heard from the surface. She wondered briefly what it was before going back to this stupid puzzle she'd seen before a dozen times.

Thax had some difficulty. Janice was large, and there wasn't anything he could really get a good hold on. It was a bit like trying to fuck a wall. Nevertheless, he made a heroic attempt, and for what it was worth, it *did* feel good. Apparently threepointsaurs could reallly work those muscles.

Even the sounds that Janice was making in response to his thrusts were encouraging, strange as they were.

"Yes, Thax! Not for a thousand years have I felt anything like this. Make me your breeding mare! Do it!"

He was. But he felt himself starting to flag. Having to do it standing compltely up was very tiring, especially with nothing to hold onto. Finally, he gave a stop, panting.

"Are you getting tired?" Janice asked.

"*Pant pant wheeze* yeah, sorry."

"Don't worry. Lie down, and I will move for you."

Thax did so, pulling out and lieing down, slowly recovering his breath.

With all the care and balance a threepointsaur coud bring to bear, Janice lowered herself onto him, taking every single inch of his long, thick equine prick, until at last he was entirely inside her. She started bouncing on him, her stance and legs making sure she never actually sat on him, but instead gave him a pleasureful ride.

Thax for his part was really enjoying it. He loved it when his partners took charge.

As he tried to find a place for his hands, he heard someone walking towards him. He looked up, and it was Madam Manha approaching.

"Please, oh hero, pleasure me too." She was straddling his head, and lowered herself down onto her knees, bringing her thoroughly soaking wet little cunny to his face.

Without even hesitating one moment, Thax dug in. His muzzle and long tongue swiftly brought tones of pleasure out of the former quester, while Janice still rode his cock like there was no tomorrow.

Suddenly, he heard that same strange vuvuzela in a metal submarine underwater sound as he felt the threepointsaur spasming on his cock, thoroughly soaking his lap and the floor around with her juices. It was clear that she'd climaxed, and that it was the first and hardest one she'd had in a thousand years.

Finally, she climed off, and nuzzled into Manha's back. "Dear sister, do you want to ride his cock? It felt every bit as amazing as I had dreamed all these years."

Manha finally managed to pull herself off of Thax's face, and gazed at his cock. She held her forearm next to it for comparison. It was the same size, but much thicker.

"Goodness! That thing would tear me in half if I tried to take it in. But I really want to try..." she gave it a quick lick, tasting Janice's juices still on it. "And it is very well lubricated..." She quickly gathered more juices from her friend and partner, and slicked up her own legs and pussy with them. "I want to try."

"Are you sure, Madam Manha? You're pretty small."

"I've never been so sure of anything. Not since I quested for the Sword Axe all those years ago."

"Okay. Lower yourself on, then. Just be careful, okay?"

Manha went to Thax's waiting cock. Even standing up, the enormity of what she was trying to take struck her, as she felt the cock brush against the back of her knee. Slowly, slowly, very slowly, she lowered herself down, until finally his tip touched her outer lips. Gently, forcibly, methodically, she tried to slide the cock in, trying very hard to get it inside her. Squeaks and squeals left her mouth as she barely managed to get the tip in at last, the sudden resistance suddenly giving way, and immediately, all of his cock up to his medial ring was inside her.

Thax felt like his cock was wearing a garment that was far, far too small for it. She was so tight it almost hurt. He was afraid to do anything. "Mmh, Manha? Are you okay?"

She was silent for a while. After a few moments, she regained speech. "Y-yes. I just needed to adjust. L-let me see..."

To Thax's astonishment, she lowered herself even further, past the medial ring, down, down, on down. He could see his cock outlined in the flesh of her belly, rising, until finally she was totally containing him, down to the hilt.

"How? How are you doing this?" Thax asked.

"Hnnnhhh, I don't know," Manha replied. "But this... I want this... I'm gonna move now..."

To Thax's amazement, she did. She was breaking new records for the tightest he'd ever felt anybody. If his cock was getting squeezed any harder, he feared it would pop. As it was, the bouncing was driving him crazy.

For her part,  Manha was a screamer. Every bounce and every movement elicited more moans and squeaks and squeals. Thax knew it was more than just his sheer size that was doing it. This was someone doing something they enjoyed after a very long drought. For his part, he felt like he was going to explode.

He almost did when a few seconds later, Manha came, and her body spasmed and shook as they could probably hear her climaxing yells in the town at the foot of the mountain. Only through great concentration could Thax hold back. He knew if he came inside her, she'd probably burst like a baloon.

"Manha, are you okay?"

"OOooh, Thax, more than okay."

"Good. I'm really close, and I wanna cum on you and Janice. Is that okay?"

"oooh, sure!"

And soon, side by side, Manha knelt next to Janice, both with mouths open, both ready to receive the splashing Thax wanted to give them.

With a knicker and a whinny, Thax let himself go, splattering all over the mouse lady's face and breasts, belly and thighs, getting some in her mouth even. Janice's face caught the cum even better, thanks to the unique build of her face. She had a taste too.

Thax sat back and caught his breath as he watched Madam Manha and Janice kissing each other.

"I think we could all use a bath after that," Janice said. "Follow me. We have a nice flowing river heated by the geothermal vents that's perfect for cleaning."

And soon, after they'd all had a bit of fun getting really squeaky clean, and had gone for another cup of tea, the door opened, and Cut came out with a very triumphant grin of sheer glee on her face.

"Your puzzle has fallen to me!"

After spending the rest of the day in Madam Manha and Janice's pleasant company, they awoke the next morning, striding through the gates that had been waiting on the other side. Manha opened them with a key, and waved them on their way.

"Farewell, Thax and Cut! Thanks for stopping by! Please, come back any time you wish!"

And with that, it was only Thax, Cut, and the road once again.

They were starting to approach the summit of the mountain. They were past the snowline now, and were it not for Cut's foresight in packing some winter gear, it would have been much harder going. Thax missed the thermal vent fed jungle already.

"They sure didn't want anybody coming up here," Thax said through shivering teeth. He was the coldest he'd ever been in his life. The village back home never got this cold. Plus something about the air seemed thinner. He couldn't wait until his adventure was over so he could get back home and be warm.

"We're almost there, I'm sure. We just have to get through here and open.... the... door..." Cut stopped and goggled. Thax came up behind, and saw just why.

There wasn't one door. There were dozens of doors dotting the cliff side. Every one was made of every conceivable material. Metal doors, bone doors, somehow wooden doors, some that they had no idea what the material was even supposed to be.

"This... how are we supposed to figure out which of these is the door to the Sword Axe?" Cut cried, not without a note of despair in her voice.

Thax got closer. There was a strange effect of dizziness he got from looking at all the doors, but this had nothing to do with any magic or defense. He got the same way looking at a bookshelf sometimes. As he tried to rest his eyes on something easier to look at, he saw that before the dizzying wall, covered in snow, was a pedestal.

He walked towards it, brushing the snow off with a gloved hand. There was writing here, but he couldn't read it. It wasn't in any writing he'd ever seen before.

"Hey Cut," he called back, "how good are you at languages?"

"I know a few here and there. Why, did you find something?" She rushed up to join Thax at the pedestal. Thax stepped out of the way as she got close to it, bending down.

"Oof. This is some stuff in the Elder Tongue. I don't know much of it. That word there is... easy? Blank? No wait, 'simple'. That one I think is a comparative? Gods, I wish I'd paid more attention in class."

"I didn't know you'd been to school."

"You never asked. I also wish I had some paper and a pencil on me, that'd make this easier... Okay, if this says what I think it says, it says 'this is simpler than it looks'. Well thanks a lot."

Thax gave another look at the many doors. A lot of them seemed to have writing on them, or engravings, or even some kind of gems, all had some kind of visual feature that caught the eye.

All except two. And they were right next to eachother.

"I think that *was* a pretty helpful hint, Cut," Thax said. "It looks like it could be either of those two doors."

They both left the pedestal behind, walking up to the doors, looking at them closely as if they were in an art museum and they were examining two interesting installations of modern art.

"Those *are* some simple doors," Cut mused. "But which is it?"

"Well, what happens if we choose the wrong door?" Thax asked.

"Nothing good," Cut replied. "Remember, this  is a test to keep the forces of evil out, after all. Opening the wrong door might unleash monsters or zap us with magic or even make the cave collapse."

"Two plain wooden doors. Hmmm."

Thax and Cut stared at the doors for what seemed like eons. Finally, Thax realized something.

"Say, Cut. The door on the left, you see that bit right above the middle?"

"What bit?"

Thax pointed. "That right there."

Cut leaned in closer. "Oh, that? I thought that was a knot in the wood."

"I thought that too, but then I wondered... lemme check something."

He went into the snow at the foot of the door, and dug around for a moment.

"Aha!" he cried triumphantly, holding up a disc with an impressive looking but cheap gem on it. "This must have fallen off. I doubt these doors have seen much maintainance in the past thousand years or so."

"Door on the right it is," Cut said, and moved her hand to the latch. She hesitated.

"What is it?"

"Are we sure that this is the solution? It just feels too easy."

"Well, what do you want to do then?"

"Good point, we have come this far."

She opened the door. No monsters poured out, no spells fired, and the cave was perfectly stable. Beyond the door, however, was pitch blackness, the darkness of a place that hadn't held anyone for nearly a thousand years.

Thax got a little ways inside, trying to stare a hole into the darkness.

"Did you bring a light?" Cut asked, unsettled by just how solid the darkness looked from the outside.

"No," Thax replied, turning around. "I wasn't expecting it to be this dark. In books, there's always either torches or light crystals or whatever else to light up old ruins and stuff."

"Fiction authors have a lot to answer for." Cut sighed.

As they talked, Thax had been messing around with the gem that had fallen off the false door. He suddenly rubbed it with a finger, and it started to give off a bright amber light.

"Huh, that's convenient," Cut remarked.

"No kidding. Let's get inside."

Lighting their way with the amber shining gem, the two entered, and just to be safe, Cut closed the door behind them.

It was a hallway. A long, straight hallway, stretching forward into what seemed like infinity. The walls were totally bare, too, only being composed of hewn stone. If anything, this was more unsettling than if there had been carvings or spiderwebs or something, *anything*. It felt like going into a tomb, descending into Hades.

Finally, when it felt like they were about to go crazy form their creepily dull surroundings, the hallway gave way to a large, vaulted dome. From the light the gem was giving off, this was a very big, impressive place.

Acting on a sudden hunch, Thax turned and looked at the corner. Sure enough, there was a button, and above it a placard with a drawing of a dome with little diagonal lines coming out of the bottom. He pressed it.

KA-THUNK

"Thax, what did you-" Cut managed to get out, before being blinded by the sudden lights that came on. Once their eyes had adjusted, they saw that the dome was now lit with constellations of light, which they realized were meant to represent the night sky.

And in the center of the dome, highlited by some lights in the floor, was a pedestal, surrounded by stairs, holding something just out of view from the floor below.

"That must be it," Thax said, "It must be up there."

They climbed the stairs, marvelling at all this grandeur. Of course it was grandeur befitting to a cave that held the fabled Sword Axe, wasn't it?

Thax felt his heart beating almost out of his chest. Even Cut was feeling the anticipation.

Finally, the two reached the top of the stairs and approached the pedestal.

On it was what looked like a handle. No blades, no axe heads, were visible on it whatsoever.

Cut threw up her  hands. "Forget it! Should have known better than to expect a thousand year old legendary weapon to be intact! Stupid stories, stupid weapons, those stupid, stupid people who sent me here! All that for this!? At least I got a good fucking out of it!"

Thax, however, was still thoughtful. He reached for the handle, and took it into his hands.

It glowed with a golden power, and he felt a warm breeze blowing from somewhere under him as suddenly everything around him melted into a white light.

He looked down. He was naked. He was sure he'd been wearing clothes just before. In his hands was the handle. As he looked close, he saw that it was roughly two feet in length, with a small division right in the center. Both halves of it from the division were wrapped in very grippy leather, and on each end were little recessed spherical nubs.

"Welcome, hero." He heard, as if the voice was all around him. He looked for who was speaking, if anybody.

Out of the bright surroundings, like somebody coming out of a milk bath, was a woman, a lioness. She looked like nobody and nothing Thax had ever seen before. She was also completely naked, and was svelt, but had very feminine curves. She had very pale blonde hair, snow white fur, and her eyes...

Her eyes were the color of steel.

"Who are you, and where am I?" Thax asked.

"Thax Homebred, heroic quester of the Sword Axe, I am the spirit of the weapon you hold in your hand. I am the essence of the Sword Axe itself. And we are in your mind, or a part of it, that I may show you how to use me."

"Why does a weapon have a spirit who's a, um, rather sexy lioness, if you don't mind me saying so?"

"If you truly wish to know, I will tell you later, but we have far more pressing matters now. In your hands I sit, but like this, I cannot fight."

"That's true. The blade and the rest of the axe are missing."

"They are not. They have been put away, until they are needed, so that I may be carried easily. Under my tutelage, you will know how to use me as you do your own limbs. And I will give you all of my blessings and all of my strength. Thax Homebred, you will become a horse transformed. A true hero."

"Okay. So, where do I start?"

The Spirit of the Sword Axe took Thax's hands in hers, guiding them. "I am a very versitile weapon. As my name says, I can be a sword, an axe, or both, and I will show you how."

Thax felt her slip behind him, her arms and hands on his, and also her bare naked body pressing into his back.

"First, grip me like this, right hand above left, with a hand's space between them. Then turn each hand outwards, like so."

As he did, he saw that a long sword blade sprouted from one of the recessed nubs. It was keen, bright, the color the Spirit's eyes had been. It almost seemed to glow with power.

"Behold my blade. Against it, all evil armor fails, and all evil weapons shatter. You see also my power. Aim it forward, and feel that it will project outwards, and behold what will happen."

Thax did so, focusing the sword point forward. The sword shone brightly, and a beam of light radiated from it with a very loud "wwhwhhhHHAAAPPEEERRR" sound.

"This is a bolt of my power. Against it, no evil will ever stand. Now, reverse what you did to draw the blade back in. Good. Now, turn me around and twist me the opposite way of before."

Now a strange metal haft extending the handle shot out, and at the end, a large double sided axe head.

"Behold, my axe head. No material can stand against it. It is ever sharp, and no material under the sky can stand against it. Further, bring the head in front of you, and think on my protection."

Thax did so, under her guidance, and he saw a radiant shape of a shield before his body.

"Behold, my protection. I will shield you from the many darts of the enemy.. Now, retract my axe head, and I shall show you the final way to wield me."

Thax wondered whether he was dreaming as he did so, or whether this was real in some way.

"Now, pull the two halves of me apart."

With a gentle pop, the two halves came apart. In his left hand was a smaller version of the axe, and in his right a shorter version of the sword.

"Now you have both of my faces at once, though using both makes them of lesser strength. Nonetheless, you have Sword and Axe, Shield and Zapper, all in one weapon. Such is the Sword Axe. Such is what I am."

"Wow," Thax said, as he felt the Spirit of the Sword Axe move to in front of him, still quite naked. He saw from peripheral vision that he had an erection, but she didn't seem to notice or comment.

"And now," the lioness said, coming close to him, taking him in her arms, "I shall convey my blessing to you. From this moment forth, we are kindred spirits, closer than your heart is to your chest. I shall not ask to be the only one close to you, but I will not leave you nor forsake you, so long as you do neither to me."

Before Thax could respond properly to any of this, the Spirit of the Sword Axe kissed him, on the mouth, deeply and fully, holding nothing back. As he started kissing and caressing her back, he felt himself enter her, and the sensation was something no language spoken by mortals could ever convey.

Suddenly, Thax awoke. He found himself on the stone floor. His clothes were gone, but for a zigzaggy patterned loincloth, but he didn't feel cold at all. As he got up, he found that Cut was next to him, staring at him like she'd seen a ghost.

"What happened?"

"You grabbed that handle, and you walked down the stairs, laid down, and then you transformed until you were like that."

"Quite a bit more happened from my end. I'll even tell you about it once I'm over it." A manic smile found itself on Thax's face. "But this is it, Cut! This is truly the Sword Axe, and she's an excellent weapon! You were completely right!"

"I was? Oh yeah, I was. So it's not just a handle then?"

"Nope! Come on, we've got to go back down the mountain! We have a lot to do now."

Cut thought the changes that had come over Thax were odd. The way the snow and cold didn't bother him very much once they were outside, despite only wearing a loincloth. The way he seemed to have more energy than before. The keenness and sense of purpose in his eyes.

Could the Sword Axe really have had this much of an effect on him? Just what went on in his head when he was out cold?

They were soon in the jungle again. Janice and Madam Manha graciously received them.

"So, hero, you have found the Sword Axe?"

"I have. We only have a moment, though. Now that we have it, there's places we need to be."

Madam Manha nodded. "Of course. Don't forget to visit us sometime, when you aren't so pressed for time."

Quickly, they were out of the jungle again. Cut had to really push herself to keep up. "Can't you slow down?" she shouted ahead, the speedwalking Thax almost sliding down the mountain.

"Not while Tjordeaux is still possibly in danger, I can't."

"What makes you think they are now? They were fine when you left, weren't they?"

"But I have the power. I can remove the threat now."

Cut stopped.  Thax took a few seconds to realize this and turn around.

"And just how?" she asked. "Do you know where Almakanti is? How are you going to find them? How are you going to get through all the thousands of his armies?"

Thax looked like he suddenly woke from a dream. "Yeah..."

"I'm not saying you shouldn't go back to your village. You should; they need to see that you're alright and that you have the Sword Axe, but the world isn't going to end if you don't get there right now. Could you please slow down? I can barely keep up with you."

Thax was silent. Cut was relieved that his familiar facial expression was returning to his face.

"You're right, I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me. I guess the Sword Axe's powers got to my head."

They arrived at the Bridge of Determination again. Thax paused.

"Do you want me to lead you across again?" Cut said.

"No. At least, not right now. Let me try crossing on my own first."

Thax aligned himself to the bridge, pulled out the Sword Axe, held it like a balance stick, and closed his eyes.

Cut watched in awe as, step by step, Thax made his way over the bridge that he'd needed her help with before. In just a matter of minutes, he was across.

After a few moments on the other side, he risked opening his eyes, and found that he'd made it across. He turned and waved at Cut with glee. "Yes! I did it! Did you see that!?"

Cut had to admit, his enthusiasm was infectious. "Yeah, you totally did that!" she cried out, as she started crossing herself. "That was amazing. You're certainly full of energy now that you've found the WHOA"

Without warning, the stone bridge suddenly gave a lurch, and Cut momentarily lost her balance. Thankfully, she had a lifetime's experience with balance and unsteady things, so she quickly righted herself and rushed for the other side of the bridge.

"Hurry, Cut! It looks like the bridge is giving out!"

"I guess thousands of years was a good run," Cut snarked as she hurried to the edge. Before she was even close, though, the bridge finally gave up the ghost and started falling. Cut made a mad jump to try to reach the edge, but only just caught on the edge of the newly made cliff.

"Cut!" Thax shouted, quickly rushing towards the cliff.

"Thax, don't! You'll look down and then we'll both fall!"

Thax took no heed, and grabbed under her arms, and with a moment's exertion, quickly pulled her to safety.

"Are you alright?" Thax asked after a few moments.

"How did you do that?"

"I closed my eyes. We got it just fine."

They rested where they were for a moment, Cut laying on top of Thax. For a little while, neither one of them really wanted to move from where they were. Eventually, Cut pushed herself off.

The two stood up, looking back at the chasm where a bridge had been before.

"Well, that's Janice and Manha cut off," Cut said sadly.

"Maybe when we get back down to town we can get someone to look into building a new bridge across," Thax replied.

"With what money?" Cut returned.

"Damn, I always forget that money is a thing." Thax said in return, "Anyway, we'd better get moving if we're going to get to town by nightfall."

And sure enough, as their feet crossed the town limits, the sun was just starting to set. It didn't look like much had changed. Thax had to chuckle, though, at all the various Sword Axe arts all around. Now that he had the real thing, he *knew* that the ones dotting the land were just ridiculous.

"You have anything you want to do, Thax?" Cut asked, still walking next to him.

"Not particularly, no," Thax replied, "Why?"

"We've been pushing hard all day, and I'm really tired. Why don't we go back to the inn and get some sleep? Make a fresh start first thing, hmm?"

"That sounds like a good idea. Now that you mention it, I am pretty bushed."

And the two went to the inn, where they were still well received, and quickly went to the bed, not even undressing, just flopping onto it and completely dropping right into deep sleep.

When Thax awoke from his sleep, he felt the cool breeze on him. He was outside, and his limbs felt like they were in totally the wrong place and being held there by rope.

Cut was in the periphery of his vision. She saw that he was awake, and mouthed the words "trust me" before she turned to the strangely armored people standing above them, weapons threatening, very much looking like they are up to no good.

"Okay, I've checked his ropes like you asked. They're tight. Of course they are. Now, our agreement? Where is Caae Brae?"

Thax struggled against his binds, finding that he is indeed bound. But then his hand brushed against something, and a switch flicked in his head. He still struggled for the look of it.

"What is the meaning of this, Cut? Why are you delivering it to them?"

Cut ignored him. "Where is Caae Brae?"

"Hand over the Sword Axe first." one of the armored people said.

"Our agreement was I'd give you the Sword Axe and the hero and you'd release her to me. Is she even here?"

"Hand over the Sword Axe," they repeated.

Cut sighed. She pulled out the handle, the thing that Thax had said was the Sword Axe.

A sudden odd weight in how Thax moved suggested that there were shenanigans going on.

"He says this is it, and I believe him. He's fresh out of the country and he's not imaginative enough to lie." She handed it to them.

"Well done." The armor said.

"Now where's Caae Brae?"

The armored person looked back. "Pff, we don't know. Probably in a ditch somewhere."

Cut sank to her knees, covering her face in her hands. She said something that Thax could barely hear. "I hate being right."

The two armored guys turned away.

"Okay Thax, now!"

On cue, Thax tugged the loose bit of rope in his hand. His binds ceased to bind anything. The real Sword Axe was back in its holster where it was supposed to be. He drew it, and with a flash, the sword blade of the Sword Axe popped into existence.

The armored people drew their own weapons. "He still has it! You traitorous cur!"

And Thax came swinging with all the strength and skill of somebody who's never actually fought a person trying to kill them before. Which is to say, he swung the Sword Axe at their weapons, which in this case was an effective display of its real power. The other swords were cleaved in two, the severed blades dropping to the floor. They were quickly followed by their hilts and handles as the shocked mooks threw them to the floor. They quickly tried to run for it.

Suddenly, the strange whistling sounds of the Serrulate Scissors flew through the air. cleaving through the seams of the helmets, making them fall completely off so they could see who they were.

The Serrulate Scissors returned to Cut. "Stay where you are, or I throw them at your necks next!"

Soon, Cut was tying them up, and this time, there would be no loose rope for them to escape with. A deer and a panther sat there, pale and wide eyed.

"I'm sure those who have strong feelings about Almakanti will find you here." Cut said teasingly. "Who knows? Maybe they'll find a nice ditch to leave you in afterwards."

The panther deeply regretted his words.

The deer, who had a bit more pride in his work, gave a mirthless laugh. "No, I'm sure we won't be waiting here long at all! After all, those mountains won't hold him for very long! He'll roll right over them, and then you won't be so smug!"

"thanks for telling me where he is and what his plan is, idiot." Cut said, and they left the two to their fate.

Once they'd gotten out of earshot, Thax said, "That was like something right out of my books."

"I'm glad you're well read, or that would have been a lot harder to pull off."

"So, this Caae Brae. Actually, no, you'd better start from the beginning. I kinda want to know whether this is the last time."

And as they walked down the road, Cut told him exactly what was up. She'd been with this Caae Brae for a few years, together as thieves on the street. Then Almakanti attacked the city they had both been living in. Caae Brae disappeared, and while looking for her, she was captured by Almakanti. He had struck a deal with her; if she found the Sword Axe and delivered it to him, along with the hero who would definitely wield it, he would restore Caae Brae back to her. To help, he gave her a cover story, a map, and the Serrulate Scissors. He couldn't go himself, naturally, because he was what the Sword Axe would consider evil.

"I didn't want to help him out. I never intended to hold up my end. But I thought if therre was even a chance I could get Caae Brae back, I had to try."

"Thanks for coming clean on all that. Man, if Almakanti is coming this way, we'd better go and warn the folks at home!"

Cut pointed ahead. "Thankfully, our trip back won't take as long."

In front of them were a pair of ridersaurs, fully kitted, ready to go.

"Our minion friends left us quite a gift, eh?" She continued.

They leaped onto the saddles, and started riding, swift as the wind, right along the road, soon making quick work of the Bleedwood Forest. The carnosaurs thankfully seemed to be elsewhere, seeking prey, or the fabled meatwood trees that they say grew somewhere in the Bleedwood Forest, which had flesh and bones instead of wood and bark, and produced organs for fruit.

They rode hard, and after a while, Tjordeaux was ahead. Thax was heartened to see his home again.

...and a bit disheartened when he saw ridersaurs bearing strangers in the same armor as the Almakanti goons they'd left tied up back at the mountain town.

"...and under Almakanti, you'll be well protected and safe from any attackers!" one was saying.

To Thax's delight, he noted that not many people were even paying attention. There was too much to do before winter started to even give them the time of day. Except, of course, a very familiar horse woman who didn't seem to have anything better to do.

"What attackers?" she said. "We're so far out of the way, who'd bother attacking us?"

Cut and Thax dismounted, walking up the rest of the way on foot. This ought to be interesting. Especially since Thax knew just who it'd be.

The Almakanti heavies struggled on this question. "The, um, uh... well, we can see that, sure, but we could also help keep the peace in this village. Yeah, that's it."

"We already do that. It's not like there's that little peace to keep."

"But we could also bring things from the wider empire right through here, through trade routes and everything!", the other heavy rallied. "Imagine goods brought right to your markets from the edges of the empire!"

"We've had traders come through here for years, and they didn't seem to need an empire to do it. And would the new stuff be worth the taxes and tribute you'd doubtlessly want for it?"

"Sure, yeah! There's like.... uh...." the two armored guys conferred, obviously  embarassed about being intellectually outmaneuvered by a middle aged lady messing with them just because.

"Okay, look, I get it. You came here, thought you'd make a speech, and we'd all be 'yeah, we'll gladly join your empire', yes? Why don't you nice boys head back and tell them thanks but no thanks, yes?"

And that boiled the last of what little patience the two had away. "We didn't ride all this way to be condescended at!" Swords came out of sheaths, and at that point Thax jumped out of where he was standing out of the way.

"Hey now, put those away before they get broken!" he threatened, handle in his hands. "You've overstayed your welcome now."

The horse lady brightened considerably. "Thax, honey! Welcome home. Why so sexy?"

"It's part of the Sword Axe's blessings, mom. I'll explain later."

"'Mom'?" Cut asked, also coming out from where she was.

"Hey, who's this you've brought home? She's quite the cutey, son. Is *this* why you're dressed like that?"

"No, mom, I'll explain! Cut, this is my mom Merenhean. Mom, this is Cut Lovingood, who helped me out getting this."

The two armored goons only looked on in confusion.

"Anyway," Thax rallied, "you guys need to go before you get hurt. This village is defended! By the Sword Axe!"

The two armored guys laughed heartily. "The Sword Axe? That dumb thing? Everyone knows that's something they made up to get kids excited about history!"

"Oh yeah? Then what's *this*?" With this, he separated the handle, and the sword blade and axe head sprung up. The Sword Axe was in fighting form and ready!

The armored Almakanti guys reacted the same way an adult would react if they suddenly learned that Santa Claus was one hundred percent real and was showing their names on the naughty list with one hand and hefting coal bags in the other.

"You... what... no! The Sword Axe is just a legendary illusion! Get him!"

If ridersaurs were quadrupeds, this is where they'd be rearing up just before running him down. Ridersaurs are bipedal, however, so they lost out on the optics of the thing, which soon didn't matter because the Serrulate Scissors cut them out of their saddles, and the villagers gave the loose ridersaurs a wide berth.

The Almakanti heavies had landed on their feet, and were quite irritated now at this upstart prick who'd stood up to them with a weapon they'd ridiculed due to its nonexistence. Their swords were drawn, and they rushed him.

Thax brought up the shield the Axe of the Sword Axe provided, and stomping at the ground, he aimed the Sword at the armored guys' swords, and with two thundrous zaps, they exploded into a shower of sparks. This stunned them in utter confusion, which just let Thax levy another zap at them, which caused all their armor to fall off.

One turned out to be a rat, who slinked off as quick as his legs would carry him.

The other, however, was a huge shock. A familiar mule face was before all of them.

"....Dondarf?" Thax said in disbelief.

"Dammit, I was hoping none of you would recognize me," he said sadly, still standing in the remains of his armor.

"Well, your mom will be glad you're no longer missing, anyway," Merenhean remarked as he traipsed off to his home, dressed only in his underwear and a covering of pure shame.

Thax put away everything, as his mother ran up, very jubilant. "Well done, Thaxy, I knew you'd be successful! It's just what I expect from mommy's little man."

"Thanks mom," Thax said, hand behind his head, blushing, really wishing Cut were somewhere else.

"Mrs. Merenhean-" Cut began.

"Just Merenhean, sweetie, we don't use those titles."

"Merenhean, it's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Cut Lovingood, and I'm glad to meet you. Your son is quite the man."

"He ought to be. I spent a good 20 years raising him up to be the man I knew he could be. Speaking of," she looked at Thax with a look that could only be registered as hunger, "could you give me a nice turn, dearie? I want to see all the angles on that cute barely an outfit of yours."

Thax did so, intensely blushing. He was hoping he wouldn't have to subject Cut to this.

"Mmm, aren't you looking just scrumptious, honey, come here and give mommy a big hug."

Cut watch mortified as Merenhean hugged her son very, very closely, and unmistakeably, blatantly copped a feel of her son's butt. She seemed to be the only one that noticed.

"Why don't you kids come back to my house and tell me about your adventures? I was just about to make a nice batch of kompot from apples!"

"I'd love some kompot, mom" Thax said back. "What about you, Cut? Want some kompot?"

"It's made from apples, right? Sure, I'd love some!"

"Great, kids, great!" Merenhean said as she put her arms around both their waists, "Let's go!"

Cut and Thax sat at the table, watching Merenhean making the kompot in her huge cooking pot. Cut stopped looking at her as a mother and started looking at her as a woman.

Like her son, she had fur the dark brown of good earth and hair like linen, which was tied into a braid at the shoulder. Her eyes, when she saw them earlier, had been the same violet color. Thax truly was his mother's son.

There was some muscle there. You didn't live in the country without some strength coming to you. Cut wondered whether the strength came up their legs from the strong earth itself. But there was also softness, bits of baby fat that never totally went away.

For reasons she didn't understand and didn't directly want to acknowledge, she felt quite jealous of Thax. She felt the magnetism, the sexual tension, that Thax was failing utterly at hiding, and that Merenhean wasn't even tring to. Suddenly, Thax's prowess despite his apparent inexperience all made sense.

Finally, Merenhean came to the table with three mugs full of kompot, with the apple slices floating in it. Cut had never seen this before, and watched with interest as Thax grabbed a spoon and ate the fruit from within.

"Mmmm, you know it's autumn when you're having freshly made kompot." Thax commented happily.

"So you eat it?" Cut asked.

"You *can* eat the fruit, dear, but it's for drinking," Merenhean replied, taking a nice sip of the golden stuff. "Now why don't you two tell me about your adventures? And don't leave anything out. My little man doesn't keep any secrets from me."

And so they told her everything that had gone on so far. With Thax's assent, they went into a bit more detail on the more interpersonal parts, which she loved listening about the most

"My, you two really have been busy! And it's so nice my Thaxy got to play around with some boys his own age. It's perfectly healthy to get some good clean fun like that."

And soon, they finished up their recapping events, right up to when they were back in town.

"So now whatcha gonna do?" Merenhean asked the two.

Thax immediately answered. "I think we should try to take out Almakanti himself. They say he's just on the other side of the Mountains of Petteritan. He'll probably be here in a month, if that."

Merenhean was thoughtful on this. "You two weren't here for their full spiel, so I'll just tell you now, it ain't just armies that Almakanti has. He's got wizards working for him too. You'll need at least one on your side."

Cut buried her head in her hands. "I knew it wouldn't be so simple," she said, mostly to herself. "I hate being right."

"Lucky for you, Mommy hears a few things. But first, you two have been through a lot today. Why don't you stay overnight? Maybe we can find ways to get a bit closer~"

Cut blushed. "What about your husband, Merenhean?"

"Oh him? He knows. Don't worry about him."

Before Thax knew it, he was naked and on his back again. His endowment as a horse was never as obvious as when two ladies were both sharing it, like now, when there was plenty of cock for both Merenhean and Cut to massage and lick and rub into shape.

He had to admit, he was very surprised that Cut was this okay with sharing him, with his mom even. He expected more questions, maybe even some grossing out, angry demands, anything. But this, was this better? This was better.

He had to admit, as good as Cut was, there was nobody who could work their mouth on a cock better than Merenhean. True, she had some help from the natural anatmy of a horse lady, but even given that, knowing just what move to make when, in just the right way to drive a partner crazy, that's something that came with experience.

What's more, Merenhean knew *him*. She knew just what he liked and didn't, and he had a pretty sure bet that Cut was paying attention and making notes.

Cut was getting her attention, too. Merenhean particularly liked petting and stroking the kitty girl, letting her hands wander where they may, all while Cut started grinding against Thax's cock. He readily admitted he had no idea that his mom batted for the other team too. Her being a switch hitter came as a complete surprise to him.

"Here, darling, why don't I show you how Thax likes being ridden, while you have a nice seat on his face, huh?"

And right away, his field of vision was taken up entirely by kitty butt. The overwhelming scent of her arousal took his brain by the stem and he found himself lapping at her sweet folds, while he felt his mom lowering herself onto his cock.

Being inside Merenhean like this was always great. Experience honed what otherwise might have been just a tight cunny into a precision machine of bringing pleasure to a cock. It was ridiculously greedy for the shaft that found itself bucking into it, pulling and milking with all the right moves.

He felt their weight shift, and tried to imagine them kissing like he bet they were doing. This brought him a bit closer than he really wanted, so he tried to think about anything else first.

So he was taken by surprise when his mother dismounted his cock, leaving it slick with her juices. He felt Cut leaving his face, too, letting him sit up for a while.

"Why'd you stop, mom?" Thax asked, seeing nothing unusual about such affairs.

"Thax, sweetie, a mother's supposed to step out of the way when her son's found someone nice. Mommy wants to watch you and this Cut cutie fuck. Fuck her like you'd fuck me, honey." She pulled up a chair next to the bed, reclining back, legs spread wide, hand unfailingly going where it'd give her the most pleasure.

"Well, Cut?" Thax asked.

"This is so weird but it's so fun! Do it, Thax!" She got on her hands and knees, swaying her ass back and forth in an enticing pattern. "Pound me while your mom watches and masturbates to it! Make me cum so hard it splashes in her face!"

"Can I stick it in your ass this time?" Thax said, feeling eager.

"I can't think of a better time. Do it!" Cut had been fingering herself in anticipation, and at this she lubricated her little tailhole with her juices, making herself nice and slick.

He grabbed her hips like he didn't want to let go, and pressed the tip of his equine cock into her pucker, sliding it right in thanks to the combined juices of Cut and Merenhean. Cut yowled as it went in, and Thax was distracted by just how readily and easily she was taking him all in.

"Are you okay, Cut?"

"Better than okay! Start pumping me, my hero~."

She didn't have to tell him twice.

The natural horse instincts took over, and he found himself pounding away. The smack of their flesh together in lively rhythmic percussion echoed throughout the hut. Equally loud were Cut's moans of absolutely loving it. She didn't get as much practice with that hole as she really should, she'd always thought, but it was good, very good, for both.

Thax leaned down, taking Cut's ample breasts into his hands, groping and massaging them as he kept pumping her to no end. They were pleasureful for him, and the attention to such sensitive parts brought Cut no shortage of joy.

Suddenly, Thax grabbed her by her midriff and pulled her up to him, then moved so he was sitting on the edge of the bed, both of them facing Merenhean, who was being a very appreciative audience. Nothing was hidden, not Thax's cock slamming into Cut's bubble butt, not her pussy, sopping wet from her vigorous treatment, not her bouncing breasts, not the heavenly look of pleasure in her face, nothing. *All* of it was there for her to see, and she loved every bit of it.

On an instinct, Thax's finger went into Cut's mouth, followed by another. She started sucking on them, almost without thinking about it. While she gave his fingers this attention, his other fingers worked their way down to her waiting pussy, massaging and stimulating every inch of it while she kept on riding his erection.

"Nyaaahh," Cut said, unable to say much in the red mists of pleasure. She felt herself melt with every violation of her. She loved it. There was no world outside of her pleasure. The intense pounding she was receiving, plus all the stimulation of her lips, and especially her clit, was finally too much for her, and with a muddled yowl she orgasmed hard, squirting her pussy juice all over Merenhean, the horse milf herself getting off on being covered in it and this erotic show as well.

Thax, too, couldn't hold back any more, and filled Cut's ass with his virile, hot spunk, so much it made Cut shiver from how good it felt.

And that was just the beginning. It went on like this into the night.

In the morning, with fuller provisions and at least some rest, they waved goodbye to Merenhean and her husband, and started south.

"I hear the best wizards are at a university on the coast, down south," she'd told them, "If you're gonna find a wizard that can compete with what Almakanti's got, that's the place I'd start."

And so Cut and Thax mounted the ridersaurs they'd pilfered from the guards, and headed off. What would be a good two weeks' journey on foot was reduced to a mere five day journey.

The plains flew by. There wasn't a lot to see. This was the breadbasket of the place. The vast fields had been harvested ages ago.  Empty fields weren't all that interesting.

At least they were relieved that they weren't seeing the stalking approaches of Almakanti or any of his forces. They weren't seeing much of anybody, really.

"How far is the next town, do you think, Thax?" Cut asked as they rode.

"How would I know? Before I met you, I'd never left the place before."

"You couldn't have asked anybody?"

"Not many people in Tjordeaux ever leave. We don't really have much reason to."

"At least not til Almakanti."

"Until Almakanti, yes. I hope we can find this magician in time. I've never actually seen one in action before. Have you?"

"Once or twice. They do amazing things with magical powers. They say it takes years of study to become one."

"I'm not sure I could be a wizard," Thax answered back. "I mean, I don't mind the reading, but I can't think of anything I do that I wouldn't just do with my hands anyway."

"Me neither. I don't really have the patience."

They rode on a bit further. They hoped, really, fervently hoped, they'd reach a town soon.

Meanwhile, far over to the north, past Tjordeaux, past the Bleedwood Forest, over the Mountains of Petteritan, a great army massed. Tens of thousands in black armor camped, making ready to cross the mountains. All the business of a bustling city went through it. Soldiers traded stories, songs, moonshine, whatever they had on hand.

In the command tent above all of these, on a hill, stood the generals, who had a stripe of primary color about their armors, and one taller than all the rest, whose armor had a crown design built into the helmet.

They were circled around one of the common foot soldiers who had just returned from scouting. It had been a difficult journey, for reasons that would soon become clear.

The one with the crown armor, who could be none other than the dread Almakanti himself, spoke, in a voice that was deeper than a well, and far colder.

"The Sword Axe has been found, you say? So it truly exists?"

"This is what I heard. The bearer came back through the city and seemed to have had it with him. He left soon after, though, and I came straight back to tell you."

"Well done."

"I would have been back days ago, my lord Almakanti, except there is a problem. There was a landslide, fed by the collapse of a natural stone bridge. The mountain pass is completely impassable. I only barely managed to squeeze through myself, and the path closed behind me."

"I see. This is unfortunate, but hardly your fault. You may leave."

"Yes sir! Thank you, sir!"

With this, the lowly scout buggered off towards the larger tent city.

"What say you now, General Cyan?" Almakanti said to the one in armor which matched the name, "Our easiest route for conquest is now lost to us. You are our grand strategist; what are our other options?"

General Cyan gave a salute. "The situation will be difficult, my lord. If we had the entire army working on clearing the pass, they might get it done in three months, maybe four; less time, if we could secure many gallons of vinegar. It would  take four months to go around the mountains on the east side, and the west would require sailing shallow and rocky waters. The underground trains, even if they had the capacity our army requires, are also down due to the mountain's  stresses. And of course, even with all of our magicians working together, we can't teleport to the other side. It's beyond our power."

"Is it? General Magenta, you were working on a mass teleport solution via your magic, yes? Would you care to report on that?"

Again, the one in the appropriate armor nodded, and started their report. "It would take an entire month of preparation, a massive ritual under the next new moon, thirty times the amount of mages we actually have, and far more magical energies that have ever existed in the known world history at least seventy times over to deliver what  you ask for. This is an improvement of where we started from, which was that it was impossible entirely."

"Dissapointing, but I don't suppose we can do anything about the laws of physics. General Yellow, has your spy ring uncovered any artifact that might help us?"

"Only rumors so far. There are stories of artifacts that can transport entire armies, but thus far, I haven't been able to confirm any of them. They appear to be strictly legendary, unlike the Sword Axe. "

"Do I detect a tone of regret in your voice, General?"

"It is all the same, I believe, my lord. The Sword Axe would not attune itself to us even had we found it. Its creators would have thought us evil, and thus I doubt we would even be able to touch it. I admit I was wrong about its nonexistence, and for that I am very sorry."

"I too doubted the stories. Nevertheless, my generals, the Sword Axe now stands against us, even if we could get the armies across. I admit, in its present state, I doubt it would do much, but if the wielder learned the secret of the Sword Axe, then there would be no army in this world that could stand against them.

"Leave me now. I will render judgement on our next course of action in the morning. Get the men some rest, and get rest yourselves."

With that, the three generals took their leave, and Almakanti returned to his tent, alone, with only the handmaidens to attend to him.

They were all blind. This was by explicit instruction. He did not have them blinded, but rather chose those who had become blind in their duties.

It was because of the First Law of Almakanti: Nobody can witness Almakanti outside of his armor and live to tell about it.

On the other side of the mountains, much farther away, on the shore, where the river flows into the sea, was the big city, a large citystate whose wealth came not only from brisk trade of the rest of the continent, but from fishing and trading with other continents via shipping routes. It was an old city, who got its start long before the rise and fall of the various empires that once made a patchwork of the known world.

The city was known as Querem. A good deal of the land around the city, far past the outskirts of the city, had historically been known as part of it. Technically, Tjordeaux was part of Querem, but it was remote and far away enough that, other than the occasional trade stop, they left it well enough alone.

Otherwise, it was something of a pyramid or stepladder of peoplekind. The workers and laborers below worked hard, whether in fields or in workshops or kitchens or whatever else, so that other people had free time enough to study the world around them. This included many people who added to the collective sum of world knowledge: the pioneering doctors, who worked to see what caused illness and what would let them eliminate it where it came up; the alchemists, who had long since abandoned their ill fated quest to turn lead into gold, and were now interested in finding just what made up the substances they came across every day; the mathematicians, whose look into numbers and equations were testing the limits of what could be found in reality; the economists, who were working out new theories for making sure everybody had access to limited means; the physicists, who were working out the very elements of movement, heat and cold; the engineers, who sought to find out just what they could do with the materials they were given; and many more...

At the top, were the magicians. The oldest and most powerful, it was these who sought to study the nature of magic, and find ways to harness it for the benefit of all peoplekind, or at least themselves.

And the building where this happens was the third largest in Querem, with only the Pandiopticon and the Palace being bigger.

This building, of course, is the Magical University of Magic, Sorcery, Wizardry, Warlockery, Witchcraft, and Enchantment, or MUMSWWWE, pronounced "mum swee", as its alumni often fondly called it. It was one of four magical colleges in the known world, and it had begun life as a federation of five smaller colleges of magic, as suggested by its long winded name that would never roll off of even the most lubed tongue.

There were five shools of magic, which the aforementioned five colleges were structured around.

Sorcery is  living magic, given to those who through heredity, taint, divinity, or the sheer finger of magical force itself, are a font of magic. Sorcery powers showed up around the same time puberty hit, which meant either swiftly learning self control or swiftly being a huge problem to the community, and one that would have to be dealt with harshly. To this end, the former Sorcery College had acted as a boarding school, teaching sorcerors self control and how to best use their gifts.

Wizardry, meanwhile, sought to use magic through mastery of the inner workings, writing spellbooks and scrolls, weaving complex symbols, making their bodies attuned to the magical forces around them. Though they lack the raw power of sorcerers, they make up for it in versatility. However, even in its chains of staffs and spellbooks and the like, magic is wild and dangerous, very treacherus, so the former Wizarding College was deliberately easy to drop out of and hard to pass. Of ten people who want to become wizards, seven drop out, two fail, and only one makes it.

Beyond the mortal populus, there are creatures that have natural magic. It's as much a part of them as their hands or blood. There are a few who are willing to share this magic with mortals, usually in trade for various things. Sometimes the trade is their soul; sometimes it's something less heavy, like their service, or a tribute. Either way, these people who borrow their magic from a higher being are called Warlocks. Wizards and sorcerers don't get along very well with warlocks; wizards consider warlockery "cheating", and sorcerers have a not misplaced distrust for the ones granting the powers in these equations. This is for good cause; those who would exchange their magic with mortals are capricious, and in the end, the power might cost far, far more than they paid for it.

Witchcraft is the kind of magic that one picks up from living in the moment, especially among the various villages. Witches need not necessarily be women, but most are, since it fits their minsets very well. It has a lot to do with psychology, and with a little bit of herblore, and knowing just a bit more than most. The other branches look down on this as being "not really magic", but it is arguably the most powerful magic when used correctly. Where the more strident magic schools could be thought of as sledgehammers, witchcraft is more subtle, like a ply bar, or asking somebody to open the door rather than just breaking it down.

Enchantment is the fifth and final school of magic, which, like wizardry, tries to tame magic with rules, but where the wizard binds them to their person, enchanters bind them instead to objects. There is some overlap between enchanters and wizards, and there are often those who do both. Wizards' staves are usually made by enchanters, but to the individual wizard's specifications. Most, if not all, non divine artifacts were made by enchanters. Before the five schools came together, the enchanters were very secretive of just what they knew, and many arts of enchantments died with enchanters.

And it was a bunch of strife nearly a thousand years ago that proved to the five colleges that they needed to come together and become one. History is scant on that period, for nobody would talk about it much at the time, and the world was far less literate.

On that note, it should be mentioned that the fourth largest building in Querem is the Great Library. Copies and originals of books from all over the known world are collected here. And it is no small coincidence that this building is right next to the University. Literacy and the written word are treasured by nearly all of the alumni there, and a desire to preserve literary works, both big and small, drove them to build this, the biggest library in the known world. Books on every topic, every subject, both broad and in depth, both meticulously researched and pulled directly out of the author's ass, could be found here. Literate members of the public, after applying for a card, could come in and read the tomes, though most were not available to any but the bureaucracy and the University students and professors.

It is on one such student that we focus now, leafing through a particulary thick tome at a table in the reading hall.

He was a raccoon. Few raccoons were admitted anywhere, thanks to an often unearned prejudice about their propensity to be thieves. This one, however, through great effort and against many odds, rose to postgraduate, a wizard through and through.

His name? Hexby Spayth. Even his name was made for wizardry.

Slowly he went through the tome, composing notes on a notebook he bound himself. It was a habit he'd picked up back when he had been poor enough to have to construct them himself from whatever bits of blank enough trash were laying around. He felt like this gave him even further connections to his notes and things.

He was thankful, very very thankful, that he never had to touch garbage again. Not if he didn't want to, and he never wanted to.

He concerned himself with the books. He had one more exam to pass before he finally got his certificate for second level wizard. It had been a difficult climb to get to even this plateau, but to continue to push the edges of just what magic could do? That was well worth it. Not to mention it was work indoors where he didn't have to lift anything heavier than a few books. That was always worth considering. There were far worse jobs to be had in this city.

He thought back to another raccoon, smaller, years and years ago, walking around an alley corner hand in hand with a stranger.

Far worse jobs, yes.

He pulled out another notebook, this one from his robes, and jotted down a note to send someone with a chicken dinner and a birthday card in a month or two. This he put away.

He struggled to continue reading the book and writing notes. Not even the excellently strong coffee, made by a device he fashioned himself for more efficient and concentrated extraction of coffee particles, was helping him. He could feel the words bouncing off of his brain. Frustration built, feeling like it was going to make his head burst, like his brain was firmly shoving on his skull, desperate to be let out.

He sighed and closed the tome, then poured the remaining coffee into a vaccuum flask he had also invented and returned the book to its shelf.

Perhaps a night's walk would help him figure out where to go next. And perhaps a drink besides coffee would also lubricate the mental joints of his brain.

Hexby Spayth, purple robes around the lithe, just slightly above gaunt body of the raccoon, set out into the city's night air. The library swiftly behind, he followed the streets of the city as they guided him to what the locals called Thirsty Lane, the road on which the three most famous taverns sat, for reasons long lost to history. Hexby didn't really get out much, so he took a moment looking at them, trying to decide where he'd go to rest himself and take in a drink, perhaps even a meal.

The first he looked at seemed really run down and overly full. He heard rowdy sounds of fighting and drinking and singing from within, and recoiled at the thought of all the blood, sweat, vomit, and who knows what else that the sawdust within would be catching. Not to mention all the spilled drink and tossed food and who knows what else.

He looked at the second. There was stone, marble, all tastefully arranged and cut. Little stone fences. The sound of gentle music wafted out of its windows. Amazingly for this city, he saw much gilding that he'd normally thought wouldn't last minutes here before being plied off and used for ill gotten gains. Alas, he was still a student, even if it was of magic, and he would doubtlessly be unable to afford what this place would doubtlessly charge. So it too would be unacceptable.

The third place was nondescript, a brick building. Not many seemed to be occupying it, which suited him fine. He preferred to be where it was less loud and not around very many people. He thought he heard piano music coming through.

Heartened, he decided to go right in. He hoped that it would be up to his standards of cleanliness, at least to an aceptable rate. As he walked in, he saw that this was indeed a clean place, if only because so few frequented it. Doing quick mental arithmetic, he glanced around, seeing who all he was sharing this tavern with.

The bartender tended the bar, as his title indicated would be his job. There were three barmaids, who didn't have much to do in this traffic, and were thus discussing things. There was the piano player, who was naturally playing the piano, more for his own entertainment than anything.

And at a table together were a horse man and a cat lady, talking with each other too low for him to hear. The cat lady looked up directly at him, unsettling him not a little, and nudged the horse guy, who also looked at him with a broad smile growing on his face.

"You there! Why don't you come join us? We'll pay for your meal." The waving horse guy said. Now that his eyes had adjusted to the low light of the tavern, he could see that he wasn't wearing much. How was he not cold? His toned body was just exposed to the elements and everything. He almost wanted to shiver for him.

All the same, being invited to dine with anybody was such a novelty for him, that he felt he couldn't resist. He fished around in his mind for something to say. "Erm, felicitations, to you both. Who do I have the honor of addressing this evening?" he asked as he pulled up a chair.

"I'm Thax Homebred, and this is Cut Lovingood," the horse man replied. "We've travelled here all the way from the north to find someone like you. What's your name?"

Someone like him? He got some future echo that this could be trouble. He suddenly wasn't so happy to be sitting amongst them. "I am Hexby Spayth, Wizard First Class. What do you mean by 'find someone like me'?"

Cut, Hexby thought, was dressed a bit more properly. She was covered from neck to foot in tight fitting leather armor. He almost wished for his composure that she'd switched outfits with Thax, so he could better keep his concentration. He looked down at the place he sat, unpleased to find slight discoloration.

"We're looking for a wizard to help us defeat the dark lord Almakanti. Would you be willing? Or maybe you'd like to hear a bit more first?"

Hexby pulled out a bottle of super-distilled ethanol, 95% alcohol and very flammable if misused, poured it on a cloth, and started wiping the table with it. "If that is your wish, naturally. However, I would be in a better mood to hear the information you have to share with me were I not listening on an empty stomach, with my mouth parched."

"Oh right!" Thax exclaimed, and waved a barmaid over. "Go on, order anything, we have you covered."

The barmaid, a white rabbit, gave a quick curtsy, and was ready to receive Hexby's order.

"I should like a bacon sandwich and a bottle of malta, if you have such," the raccoon said, finishing his wiping of the table.

"Right away!" the barmaid said, and bounded off.

Hexby put away the now slightly soiled cloth he used, and then poured a few drops of the ethanol on his hands, using it to clean them very thoroughly.

"You okay, Hexby?"

"Of course, Thax Homebred. It is merely that one cannot be too cautious when it comes to dirt and filthiness. If one is not careful, very very careful, one could easily perish from the illnesses that one could avoid otherwise."

Cut leaned over to Thax. "Wordy, ain't he?" she said to him just too low for him to hear.

"Not sure we want to bring a wizard too afraid to get dirty. He'd be miserable on the road."

"He may be the best we get though." Cut turned to him. "So, a first class wizard, eh? I don't suppose you'd like to tell us just what you can do?

"My studies have allowed me to discern what types of magic something may be, and allow me to call upon the elements and forces in a few ways that may be of some help, if you truly wish to have me for your team. I admit that there are many more powerful than I am, however."

"Probably, but I admit  we probably couldn't afford any of their services." Thax said. "We could probably barely afford yours, if we're going to be totally honest."

Hexby's food and drink arrived. The bacon sandwich was made with brown sauce on toasted bread, perfectly executed, and the malta was served in a glass, on ice even. Hexby was pleased. He tore into the sandwich hungrily, savoring every bite. This was much better than his usual fare, which up to now had been toast sandwiches every other day, when he could manage. The other two also had their food arrive, and they too were eating, though not as ravenously.

Soon the sandwich was gone, and the ice bereft of the rich malta it had been chilling, which Hexby had found prepared to perfection. He'd have to come to this place more often. He wondered, in fact, why it was so empty.

As he was wondering, there was a sudden change in the atmosphere of the nearly empty tavern, like the sudden absence of a noise that had been going on in the background, easily ignorable until it stopped. The piano player noticed, stopped playing, and went up the stairs. The barmaids followed swiftly behind.

The bartender, a big burly bear guy, went up to the party at the table. "Pardon me, folks, but would you care to follow me upstairs? Only, you really shouldn't be in the bar right now."

"Thank you, barman, but we're not done eating quite yet, and we'd hate to leave the meal here," Cut replied.

The bartender gave a shrug. "Suit yourself. I'll clean up after you when it's over."

As he joined the others of the bar upstairs, the three realized that this was pretty ominous.

Suddenly, every light in the tavern flickered like it was being walked past. Slowly, very slowly, like reality was out of focus and was adjusting itself to sharpness, ghosts appeared all over the dang place! They had ghostly laughs and ghostly drinks and ghostly  peckersaur legs and ghostly grazersaur steaks and ghostly laughs... and ghostly weapons.

Thax, Cut, and Hexby found themselves completely surrounded by the undead.

"Indeed," Hexby said, "I had been pondering just why such a fine eating and drinking establishment had been so empty. Now we have the answer to our query: it appears to be quite thouroughly haunted."

Thax and Cut just stared all around. They'd heard ghost stories, of course, but never had much cause to believe them before.

"You're awful calm about all the ghosts that are surrounding us, Hexby," Cut said after adjusting to being surrounded by the shades of the departed. 'Is there something you don't know that you'd like to tell us?"

'With certainty, Miss Lovingood. The undead intangible apparations that surround us currently are indeed what are colloquially called 'ghosts', though they have many other names throughout magical science and folklore, which I will spare you from as they are of very little importance at this time. Ghosts are normally quite a rare phenomenon, usually called into being when the recently deceased has failed to achieve a goal of some importance in life. For there to be this many ghosts in this public house is quite unusual indeed."

"So what should we do about this?" Thax asked.

"I am afraid that, considering the options available to us at this juncture, Mr. Homebred, I am uncertain as to the course of action that we should undertake." Hexby scanned the room full of ghosts, his magical eye seeing a bit more than Thax and Cut would be able to. All those trained in, or born with, magic can see more than most mortals.

"The ghost behind the bar over there seems to maintain a more intense morphogenic field than the rest of these specters. Perhaps we should engage in conversation with the shade, wherewithal we shall ascertain the needed course of action."

"Talk? To a ghost?" Cut asked, her head cocked in the universal "I'm not getting this" gesture, "I thought ghost communication was one way."

"Often, indeed, but not necessarily, Ms. Lovingood. In any case, it is the least risky course of action we can undertake currently. Should it prove a wrong course, we lose nothing, and should it be the correct one, we have  a way forward to deal with these spirits once and for all."

Hexby rose from his seat, his flowing purple robes of wizardry straightening themselves out as he strode over to the bar. The ghost there bore an incredible resemblance to the bear who'd fled upstairs with the rest of the pub's crew. He wondered briefly whether there was more to this than they were letting on.

"Greetings and well met, apparation," Hexby began, noting the bear ghost's startled expression as he continued. "We could not help but to see that you and your ethereal comrades have become bound to this locality, and we wish to inquire the means by which we wish to liberate you from the chains binding you to this mortal coil, so that you may leave here posthaste in pursuit of your final rest."

The bear ghost stared at Hexby for a few moments, as if he were running the words he'd just heard through his ectoplasmic brain.

The bear turned his dead eyes towards Thax. He opened his mouth and said, in the tones of the dead, like someone trying to do a creepy voice through a reverb filter, "What did your friend just say?"

This calmed Thax down a bit. Maybe the dead weren't so unrelatable after all. "He says he can't help noticing you and a bunch of your friends are haunting the place, and he wants to know how we can help."

"Wait, we're dead? Ah crap, that'd explain why it's just us most nights. I wonder if it had anything to do with that warlock fella that came in one day. He really wanted a calzone, but I'd just sold my last one, and I'd have baked another batch, but I was totally out of pepperoni and mozerella. He made some crack about 'may you never run out for all eternity' or something like that. Next thing we know, every night feels like it's the same night. We thought it was just deja vu, but we're ghosts? That sucks."

"What did this warlock look like?" Cut asked.

"Surliest guy I ever saw. Otter guy. Had a scar on his face, just under his left eye. Walked favoring his right leg and mumbled under his breath a lot."

Hexby looked really thoughtful.

"This guy ring a bell?" Thax asked him.

"Perchance. This fellow the shade refers to reminds me very much of a professor that presides over one of my classes at the University." He turned to the ghost bear. "Did this warlock have eyes like unto a pair of frosted orbs with iron nails at their core that seemed to look through you and into the beyond?"

The ghost bear took a moment to digest these words. Thankfully, they were easier than the previous. "He did at that. You got the feeling they were looking at something six feet behind you rather than at you."

"It must he him, then. My heartily expressed gratitude, oh shade. We shall immediately and postwith endeavor to mitigate and remove what binds you, and guide you towards the peace that awaits."

"Thanks?" the bear said in return.

The three walked out of the haunted pub. "So who is this warlock? You seem to know who it is." Thax asked Hexby.

"Indubitably. It can be none other than my professor of literature. Alas, by now he is away to his biannual recreational stomping grounds, a high tower to the west. Alas, he will not look kindly on us should we ask for him to release the curse that those poor specters are under."

"We can't just leave those ghosts like that," Cut said remonstratingly. "It isn't right cursing a bunch of people to undeath just because you can't get a calzone."

"Indeed, it reflects very poorly on me and other alumni of the university that one of our own esteemed and vaunted professors committed this picadillo. We must aright this with as much speed as we can muster. Should you help me with this, and should you fulfill another request to be determined at a later date, I shall gladly rejoinder your quest to remove the dark lord Almakanti, whatever small and picayune aid my own magical abilities shall be."

Thax nodded. "It's a deal. So where do we start? Do we just pay him a visit at his tower?"

"Would that it were so easy, Mr. Homebred. We shall have to tread carefully. He is a very powerful warlock, eighth class, whose patron is, while mysterious, doubtlessly incredibly powerful. Perhaps a sending of messages could become a preface to our visits."

"If we're going to deliver a letter anyway, why not just go straight there?" Thax asked?

"I don't think that's the kind of sending he means, Thax" Cut replied.

"That is quite correct, Ms. Lovingood. I shall perform the sending spell presently."

Hexby Spayth started weaving his hands in complicated patterns, waving various jazz hands, fingers flurrying, as under his breath he mumbled a bunch of indistinct syllables.

He suddenly opened his eyes, which had a strange color, as did most of the face. "Professor Lonaldo, I send my greetings and regards, as well as thankfullness for the lectures that proved very informative. I wish to visit you to discuss important affairs, and wish to bring guests. Please respoond."

The message invisibly tinkled along unseen strings in the ethereal planes. They stood around for a minute, waiting for a response. Suddenly, Hexby looked into the distance between Thax and Cut, like he was listening to an invisible, unhearable person in the distance.

"I understand," Hexby said at last.

"What did he have to say?" Cut asked.

"We shall need to go post haste, but to even be allowed in, we shall need to bear him a meal. It seems he has an especial taste for calzones."

"I see," said Thax. "Well, fortunately I'm sure I know a bear that could help us out there, if he could be coaxed out of his hiding spot."

They returned to the haunted pub. The ghosts gave them all a friendly wave and a raise of ghostly glasses.

"Have you figured out how to free us?" The ghost bear asked.

"We're working on it," Thax said. "We'll need some calzones. I just need to get the guy whom I'm betting is related to you to bake some."

A lot of coaxing later, the bartender was finally convinced to come down.

"Well blow me! That's my uncle's ghost!" he cried out in surprise. "He disappeared years ago in that strange event!"

"Oh hallo nephew! Don't worry, we'll be out of your way soon. We just need to bake some calzones. I'll give you the recipe to make them extra special."

"Thanks! I bet my patrons will like them after this is all over. To the kitchens!"

Cut, Thax, and Hexby watched in awe as the barmaids, the bartender, and the ghostly bear all worked together on making these legendarily tasty calzones. Dough was mixed, rolled out, and kneaded, pepperoni and mozerella were sliced thinly, ingredients were wrapped, spices appended, the oven fired up, the calzones shoved in, baked, and then finally wrapped up in paper and put in a box with thick walls to keep them hot for as long as possible.

"Hopefully you and all your spectral comrades shall be released to whatever afterlife awaits you before we return once again unto this public house. So, hoping that all goes well with our quest, I bid all of you adieu and wish you safe travels on the journey ahead of you!"

The ghosts waved and cheered as they started mounting the ridersaurs. Thax pulled up Hexby, gallantly offering to share his ridersaur since they only had the two.

"Are you quite sure this beast is sanitary?" Hexby asked, blushing not a little at riding in front of Thax, the horse's arms around him and chest against his back.

"Yes, it's clean enough, don't worry. How far is the tower?"

Hexby pointed. "To the east, just at the edge of the city. Compared to its surroundings, the tower of my literature professor should be the tallest, largest of buildings above the ground for miles around. There is no possibility of our missing it."

And so they rode as swiftly as the ridersaurs would carry them, to the east. Sure enough, over the horizon, a tall, thin tower rose out of the ground, appearing very much like a stretched king from a chess set. Its crown touched the clouds, and around it the buildings got sparser the closer they approached.

"I just hope the calzones will still be hot when we get there," Thax said.

"They shall be. I cast my magic upon the box, that it would, to the best of its supernatural ability, contain the thermal differences between the calzones and the environment around most efficiently. Once they are out of this efficient storage box, they shall be as if they were fresh baked. I should hope I have not spent most of my life studying the arcane arts in vain, if I have done this to help those around me."

Thax leaned in, his hands being occupied, and gently nuzzled Hexby's face. "You're as nice as you are wordy," he whispered in his ear.

Desires stirred up in the depths of Hexby's libido, desires that he had every desire to obtain, but never had the time to pursue. Magic was a harsh, demanding mistress, that demanded much study, concentration, memorization, and sheer energy and force of will to master. Indeed, other less lax universities of magic forbade students from having anything to do with women (students at such universities being assumed to be male), but this was rumored to be for other reasons, and would not have helped Hexby in the least. Women were not what his desires ran towards.

He wanted the cock, you might say.

Soon enough, after being a bit unsettled at the amount of snow happening around the warlock's tower for this time of year, they were there. It was obscenely tall, like an abandoned lighthouse far from shore. It was completely black, obsidian black, from base to tip. It seemed to curse the stars that came out.

Thax hoped swiftly off the ridersaur, and moved to help Hexby down from his, when suddenly he slipped and fell off of the other side. Thax swifly ran over. "Are you alright, Hexby?"

Hexby stood up. "I seem to be within acceptable health paramet-" he looked down at his robe and his hands, which were covered in snow and dirt from the fall. "Ddddddddirt! Dirty! UNCLEAN!" The raccoon wizard lost his cool, collected manner and his verbosity quite rapidly, trying really hard to get the mud and snow off. "Filthy! Dirty! Agh get it off!"

Thax grabbed Hexby by the shoulders and forced him to look him in the eye. "Power through the fear, Hexby. It's fear! We have much more important things to do! You can clean up when we get in. Stay strong, okay?"

Looking into Thax's eyes, with the rest of Thax's torso and legs in view, did a lot to calm down Hexby, but the fear was still riding his mind, unwilling to let its cold tendrils release him. "I shall endeavor, Mr. Homebred, but... aaagh, it's dirty... need to wash..."

Cut sighed. Why am I a magnet for basket cases? She asked inwardly. Ourwardly she took the box of calzones and headed for the tower. "Let's deliver this stuff, get the curse undone, and then you can get washed up." She knocked at the tower door. "Calzone delivery!"

"Ah, h-he can't hear you from there. I-it's a rather large t-tower. If I may get myself calm..." Hexby struggled. He tried never to get dirty in the first place, and now that he was he was trying hard to reign in the cold burning irons of fear wracking him all over. He tried to imagine that he was truly clean in some vital way that was different from his current physical experience.

Finally, he found a little core of calm, and expanded it, fed it with energy from all over his mind, let it go.

"Okay. I believe I have regained sufficient calm to cast another sending."

Once again his face lit up in a strange way. "Professor Lonaldo, we have arrived with the calzones. Please let us in. Also we should like to wash up before any calzone feasting begins. We are at your door."

No sooner had he finished the spell than the wide doors started to open outwardly. Thax and Cut had to step back a bit to make sure they weren't hit by the doors.

Behind them, peering out, was a crotchety old otter. He had the scar on his face. His one leg did look withered. But the eyes.

The eyes were the worst. They weren't merely the eyes of someone who was angry or absent. Those were eyes of pure icy madness.

"My calzones." he intoned. Cut handed him the box. Lonaldo looked a it for what felt like ages, as if he were trying to remember how to operate some machinehe looked at once a hundred years ago. Finally, he remembered that he had to open them.

The warm smell of bread, spices, and cheese and pepperoni greeted him. "Caaaalzoooones" he said.

"They came from a pub you went to in the city. You turned everybody into it into ghosts. I now ask, please undo the curse. Let them pass on." This Cut said.

The unseeing eyes of Lonaldo went wild. "MINE! My calzones! Not yours! Don't know what you mean by pub! Pub wouldn't give me calzones!"

"Ah, we were afraid of this," said a sad old voice from behind him.

"I am truly sorry, oh learned professor." Hexby said, almost too softly to hear. And just now Thax noticed that his eyes hadn't stopped giving off a faint light.

"It is well that you sent us the message, young Hexby Spayth," said another old voice. If Cut and Thax really, really focused, they could see in the back the faint magically projected images offive people.

Lonaldo found his voice again. "Grrrr, council! You want to steal my calzones! Well you can't have them!" He tried shoving one in his mouth all at once, only succeeding in badly burning his mouth. He was too far gone to notice or care.

"So be it. As the four heads of the University, plus the second most senior order of the Warlocks, by the power vested in us by the city state of Querem and by the laws and powers of magic, we expel you from the order, undo your outstanding magics, and banish you from this plane."

Vast magical lights lit up the tower, throwing the five figures into shadow, and convened on Lonaldo, opening up a rift under him. It was dark and full of stars.

The last thing he said as he sank into the void was an ethereal cry:

"CAAAAAAAAALZZZZOOOOOOOOONEEEESSS!"

It closed, and the tower went dark, leaving Thax, Cut, Hexby, and three fresh, warm calzones, alone in the tower.

Thax put the lid back on the box, making sure the calzones would be fresh to eat for later.

"So, that happened."

"Indeed, Mr. Homebred. I'm afraid warlockery, should one's mental fortitude stray but a little, shall one day take the warlock's mind. His madness devoured him."

There was silence.

"So, feel like that bath now?" Thax asked.

"I had feared you would never ask me. Come, the heads of the University have gifted me this tower, since Lonaldo had no heirs and I had brought this to their attention." Hexby, for the first time, wore a facial expression that wasn't heart rending terror or gray neutrality, a very wide smile. "Old Lonaldo had a masterwork shower installed here."

Thax followed Hexby as they wandered through the corridors of the ponderously large tower, decorated by very strange tapestries and portraits. Thax tried not to look too closely at any of them. Being the avid reader he was, he was well aware of the reputation warlocks had.

"You need not follow me, Mr. Homebred," Hexby said, consulting a map in the air in front of him as he searched for the Magical Mystery Misophore Machine. "The heads of the University have already endeavored to neutralize any ethereal and eldrich creatures or spells and enchantments we are likely to discover here."

"That's not why I'm following you, Hexby." Thax said.

"Then if I may be so bold, why come?"

"I played a part in getting you dirty, I may as well help you get clean." Thax winked.

Hexby blushed again. "I will be very happy to get all this dirt off me. I am amazed I have been able to keep myself this sedate."

At last they came across the Magical Mystery Misophore Machine, which had bronze doors that totally clashed with the rest of the decor.

The inside clashed even further. Thax wondered whether Lonaldo had even cared what went on in here, it was so different from the rest of the tower.

It was bigger than Thax's entire house back in Tjordeaux. There were mirrors and sinks on one side, pristine self cleaning lavatories on the other, and in the middle, a nice big tub and something else Thax didn't recognize and couldn't figure out. It had a floor that sloped very slightly to a drain in the center, little shelves around it that held bottles and bars of soap (none of them, and this room in general, seem to have ever been used), and a strange conical device on a pipe from the ceiling, that seemed to have a pair of knobs on the side.

As for the walls of this room, they had beautiful murals on both short walls of natural settings, and on the wall opposite the door of multiple lovingly rendered people bathing. It was kind of relaxing.

"Welcome, Mr. Homebred, to the most efficient bathing room known to personkind.", said Hexby as he pulled off his soiled robes and placed them in a device by the door. "No dirt or grime survives here."

Thax removed the Sword Axe from its sling and placed it in a handy alcove, his apportioned outfit disappearing as he did, leaving him equally totally nude.

Hexby looked at him. He'd never seen this much of anybody, and he wanted to take in as much as he could while he could. Thax was appreciating the attention, and looked back at Hexby.

He certainly had the body of somebody who didn't get much exercise and who ate just enough. He was thin, but not gaunt, 'petit' would come to mind looking at him. But what really got his attention was what he was packing.

"Shall we try out this... I'm not sure what this is, but it looks like fun."

"It is a shower, Mr. Homebred-"

"Please, we're this intimate, we've seen each other naked, call me Thax."

"As you will, Thax. It is a shower. It delivers water to the temperature you want, like a relaxing and more efficient waterfall." He turned the knobs, and sure enough, like a concentrated rain storm, water came out.  Steam started to gather around the shower. After the unseasonal cold outside, especialy for Hexby who didn't have the Sword Axe's blessing of enduring any elements, some nice, warm water was certainly welcome.

"The old warlock guy didn't even take these soaps out of the wrappers. Oooh, lavender!"

"This much I have to be thankful for," Hexby replied, unsealing a bottle. "Lonaldo was rather old fashioned about such things. Doubtless this room was a gift, and he persisted in using a river or some such."

"His loss is our gain. Let's get lathering."

And so they got to work under the very pleasantly warm water. The smell of lavender spread out as the started working it into each other's hair and fur, bodies soaping up, Thax's muscles and Hexby's lack of them.

"You feel very good, you fluffy tailed mage," Thax let out softly as his firm hands went lower and lower, across Hexby's midriff, down, down, to the prize he was thinking about ever since he caught a glimpse of them a few moments ago.

"Yes, Thax, touch me there. I want it." For some reason the big words he'd use partly out of habit and partly out of affectation just wouldn't come to his mind as he felt the horse guy's strong hands start fondling and caressing his balls.

They were huge! They were larger than Thax's, like oranges. They were pleasantly hefty, almost made to be hefted and massagged and cupped. A hand then moved up to find his hardening cock.

He found it. It was like a thumb if you doubled the width. Thax hoped he was a bottom, because between the ball size and everything, he'd have a harder time being on the giving end. He still rubbed it. It was cute, and it felt good in his hand, in any case.

And Hexby was making really cute sounds as he did so.

"I can feel your cock against my back, Thax," he let out as he felt himself getting worked. "Are you going to stick it in me?"

"Are you sure you can handle me, Hexby?"

"I have practiced a lot. I am ready for it. I have dreamed about this moment for so long. Do it!" This last was half command, half plead.

Thax didn't think twice. He wanted to stick it in. Sure enough, he pressed against that raccoon pucker and slid it in slowly, inch by inch, feeling the intense pressure almost fighting against him. Hexby's moans were just making him harder. Soon, it was all in.

Hexby panted. Thax still had one hand on his cock, and were it not for the shower they were both in, he'd have felt a leak of precum on his hand.

"You okay?" Thax said to him.

"Good, yes! This is everything I'd hoped for. Now MOVE!" He said this last with a force that burst through Thax's ears and into his mind like a battering ram through the front door.

The smacks that Thax's thrusts made against Hexby's surprisingly soft ass were music to his ears. The way he worked his shaft like an experienced professional was insane. He wondered just how Hexby had practiced because it worked. Damn did it work.

"Yes! Yesssss! Fuck me more Thax! This is it! This is what I wanted!"

The pre was oozing so swiftly and there was so much that Thax was now noticing. He was impressed. He was also impressed at how it was Hexby that had taken all of the initiative and was in the driver's seat despite being the one bottoming.

But soon it was too much. Thax suddenly found Hexby clenching him to a standstill as he came really hard. Thax had his eyes closed from the sensation, so he had to hear what was going on. He heard  three very wet loud THAPs, one right after the other.

Once he opened his eyes, he wished he was watching.

Hexby came a ridiculous amount. There was a big off white river flowing all the way across the room, and the door on the opposite side was *soaked* in his semen. And he was *still* cumming.

How could a tiny dick like his cum so much, big balls aside?? This was amazing.

"Anhh... Thax" The raccoon slipped forward, letting Thax's cock slide out as he did. "Thax, that was incredible."

Thax was totally speechless.

"Oh, you have not yet achieved orgasm. Allow me to assist you with that, as thanks for the biggest orgasm I have ever had."

He took the liquid soap he was using and lathered up Thax's cock, cleaning it off thoroughly while massaging it to keep it hard. Once the soap was rinsed off, Hexby took the member in his mouth. He couldn't open  it quite wide enough to take more than the tip in, so he contented himself with this, and licked the head all over while his hands worked the shaft.

Thax was pretty much there already, so he gave him the warning, just before he himself orgasmed, filling the raccoon's mouth as it exited, then splashing all over his face and chest, where the showering water soon washed it away.

With some pleasure, Thax saw that Hexby swallowed.

"Well, we should hurry up and finish washing." Thax said, helping him back up to his feet.

"It is truly fortunate that this tower is self cleaning. I would hate to have to clean my mess up myself, or trouble another to do so for me."

They soaped themselves up again, and this time managed to wash themselves and eachother without fucking.

Once they were thoroughly rinsed off, Hexby shut off the water flow. "This is the handiest feature, Thax. Behold!"

He pressed a button that was hidden as part of the knob. What felt like a strong, hot desert wind blew up from the floor, and after a good minute, Thax and Hexby were thoroughly dry.

"Man, that is handy! That shaved off so much time Iwould have spent toweling off."

"Indeed, Thax. Now, let us retrieve our clothing so that we may rejoin Cut in partaking of those particularly delicious calzones. Their smell has driven me quite to distraction when we were on our way to this tower."

Soon, dry and dressed, they went right back down, to see Cut playing a hand of solitaire at the table. "Took you two long enough. Just how dirty were you that you needed that much cleaning?"

"Next time you can have a turn at the bath, Cut, that was amazing!"

"Just how amazing can a bath be, Thax?"

Thax and Hexby shared knowing glances at each other and had a good chuckle before finally digging into the delicious, hot calzones that had been waiting oh so very long to delight their tastebuds.

They decided to spend the night and make an early start, knowing that there might be a great deal of things to deal with soon, and dealing with them with a good night of sleep would be better than dealing with them otherwise.

In the tower, near the top, they found the master bedroom. They were very glad indeed that the tower did automatic cleaning, because they'd hate to have to sleep in the late warlock's juices.

The bed was big enough to sleep all three, which they were happy with. And thus Thax fell into sleep, Cut in one arm and Hexby in the other.

In his dreams the Spirit of the Sword Axe visited him. "Greetings to you, Thax. I have much to tell you while you rest."

"Oh hi. I didn't think I'd be seeing you again."

"Since I exist adjacent to the astral plane, I see things that some do not. I wish to tell you that the spirits you wished to free by confronting the warlock are indeed free, and on to a nice rest."

"That's good."

"I have yet more to say. I know the purpose for which you sought me, and I wish to tell you. The Dark Lord Almakanti has been halted by an avalanche in the Mountains of Petteritan, which has delayed his mechanizations for a time. This is a great boon, and we must take the initiative quickly while it is available to us. Even now, he and his men are trying to clean out the mountain pass, that the planes between Querem and the mountains might be conquered. He thinks himself in safe territory, so he is uniquely vulnerable. I have contacted an ally who will fly you to the place."

"I didn't think any creatures were left that could fly."

"Yet it is true. Now, rest easy, oh hero. I can help with such relaxation, if need be."

Thax gladly enjoyed the leonine spirit's company. He wondered if this counted as a wet dream, and whether he and his friends would wake up sticky the next morning.

Meanwhile, far to the north, at the same time, the forces of Almakanti were working very hard. The many massive stones of the avalanche had buried the pass to a height twice that of an average person. The magicians in Almakanti's service did their part to help at first, but it's rather hard to clear away large stones when you'd have to stand on molten rock to do it. In response to this, the dark lord simply ordered them to use their magic to aid the workers instead. This was going much more smoothly.

Meanwhile, Almakanti himself was in his tent, outside of his armor. His blind handmaids were rubbing him, soothing the aches of his body that wracked him when he wore the armor for too long. He knew what it was doing to him, but he couldn't stop. Nobody could ever see what he truly looked like. Not since... he stopped that thought where it was and tossed it back into the abyss whence it came.

One other blind woman was in the tent with him. She was a seer, and had come highly recommended by General Yellow.  There were contradictory clues to just how old this seer was. She seemed both old and young, simultaneously, as much as that made sense. She could be any of the three traditional witches, the mother, the maiden, or the crone.

She called herself Ms. Crowefs, and as her name implied, she was a crow. Since she didn't have any sight since she was a child, she was welcome inside Almakanti's private tent. He easily trusted people to keep secrets when the circumstances didn't allow them to do otherwise.

"What do you see? What threats are out there, that I feel in my gut but have no proof of?"

"Mmmm, there was much rejoicing in the astral planes this night. I feel a great power has left the world, and its victims continue where their paths should have led them long ago."

"I suppose that is good news. Does this have anything to do with us?"

"Not directly. Those who have ushered the great power out, however, have a great power among them, and should nothing be done, in five days' time you shall meet the power and its bearer in person."

Almakanti murmured in thought. "I don't suppose it is to join forces with me, is it?"

"No indeed. Should they succeed, your great conquest will come to an end."

"That is unacceptable! It was my father's wish that our kingdom should reach from sea to sea, and whatever I think of the logistics and wisdom of trying to rule an entire continent, I will see to it that this manifest destiny is carried out. Otherwise, what kind of son am I?"

"I understand your father asked the same question, many times-"

"Shut up." Almakanti said quickly, standing up so fast that he knocked a few handmaidens over. "I brought you here to discuss the future for me. Do not talk to me about affairs of the past. My father has passed on, and he no longer has any power over me, save his last request, and even that is less for his sake and more for those he shared his life with. As you must know; I never discussed my family or my childhood or any of that with anyone."

"If I have offended you, then I am truly sorry."

"No, sorry isn't enough. You incurred a debt of honor for going too far over your station in our talk, discussing things you should not. There is a price that needs paying now."

Ms. Crowefs saw the immediate future quite clearly. The easiest fortune for a seer to read is their own, five minutes out. She knew there was no way to prevent what happened next, but she felt she had to say some things anyway, like an actor reciting their lines in a play.

"I would pay, lord, but I have no money, and nothing of value but my readings, which I already provide merely for food and old clothes."

He's going to say that I do have another way to pay, she thought.

"But you do have something with which you can pay your honor debt to me."

"What is that, oh lord?" she asked, knowing the answer before she even asked.

"You will give me what I have lacked for all those years, that which I swore an oath I would not use the handmaidens for, that which my very need to hide my body and face prevents me from getting anywhere else."

I would pay him back with my body, she thought with an inward sigh.

"You will pay me back with your body. You are uniquely in a position to take care of needs I've strong neglected my necessity. I wonder whether General Yellow sent you to me for this knowingly."

There was nothing for it, was there?

"Then my body is at your service, Lord Almakanti. Do what you will with me. Only please, don't hurt me."

"I have no desire to hurt you, Ms. Crowefs, you need not fear."

She could feel him approaching. The sounds of footpads, the air currents, the feel of his breath on her now. Ms Crowefs felt her hat being removed from her head and heard it gently fall onto a nearby cushion. You stupid boy, she thought to herself, by taking this course you're already harming me.

She felt his hands touch her face. They were surprisingly soft. At least, they would be surprising in their softness if she hadn't known they were going to be. She knew his secrets, she knew, and it was only his committment to the letter of the law that was saving her life.

After all, she had never looked at him, nor seen him, and never would.

He, however, was seeing her. All of her. She felt a hand untying her robe's sash, and heard the sound of it falling to the floor, her body exposed to him and the air in the tent, which was thankfully warm enough that no real discomfort made itself manifest.

She made no effort to cover herself. It would do no good.

"Truly, Ms Crowefs, your body is beautiful," Almakanti said, desire and appreciation obvious in his tones of voice. "I've never seen its like anywhere in all my life."

This was true. Ms. Crowefs could be called matronly if you wanted to be unfair. Once she had probably been a very comely young woman, if somewhat stocky, and gifted in the thighs. Now age had made some things bloat and other things sag, just a little, just enough.

"Does my old body please you, my lord?" She said, as if she were reading a script a few feet away from her face.

"Old? Don't talk yourself down like that. You are beautiful, truly so." She felt his hands on her, along her shoulders, along her arm wings, down her back. She felt herself pulled against him. He himself was very fit, she could feel. She wouldn't go so far as to say he was an adonis, but he was certainly well toned, as she expected him to be.

She felt his erection against her pudgy belly, while his hands firmly squeezed and rubbed her buttocks.

"Would you put your arms around me? Hold me like you would a lover?" he said, a small amount of pleading in his voice that most probably wouldn't pick up on.

She obeyed. Carefully she put her arms around him, enduring his giggling as her feathers tickled him a little. He was someone she wouldn't have minded holding like this, under different circumstances, and were she a bit younger.

She felt his hand leave her back, where it was before, and felt it gently stroking her hair, which was a long, somewhat messy tangle now that the hat and the bun were gone. She then felt it gently hold the back of her head.

"Kiss me," he ordered, again with a hint of begging. "Kiss me as you would a husband or a lover."

She couldn't help but feel some pity. She nodded, and let him guide her beak to his muzzle. They kissed. The topography of a muzzle and a beak french kissing is somewhat difficult, so little attempt will be made to describe it.

They pulled away from eachother, and she, with some kind of eldrich sense, could feel his eyes trying to bore into her dead ones. She could not see this, she just knew.

"Even though they see nothing, your eyes are beautiful, too." Almakanti continued.

Ms. Crowefs felt herself heating up, despite herself. She too had these needs, and long had they gone unseen to, since... she stopped that painful thought and put it away for later. She needed to be strong now.

"Come with me," he said, taking her talons in his hand. She let herself be led to where Almakanti rested at night. The handmaidens were now standing around, an audience to this radio play that played out before them.

Almakanti laid back on his bedding, guiding Ms. Crowefs to lay on top of him. He gently guided her back, and she knew what he wanted.

"Do you know how to give a breast job?" he asked, with some embarassment.

"Ah, yes. I shall give you one to the best of my ability, my lord." She shifted herself, guiding his member to the valley between her bosoms. It was a simple matter to rub it with them, occasionally licking his tip when it surfaced.

"Mmmmh... this feels delightful," he moaned, some note of glee escaping  his mouth as he bucked his hips slightly. It was only thanks to Ms. Crowefs's second sight that he missed poking her hard beak in a painful way.

At last, as a bead of pre formed itself on his tip, he sat up and reached his hand out and touched her arms. "Stop. I don't want to cum yet. I think we are ready for the main payment to be made."

Ms. Crowefs let herself be turned over, laying on the bedding on her back. She could feel his gaze all over her again.

"Now spread your legs. Let me see your pussy."

She did. Framed by her thighs and her tailfeathers was her pussy, which was indeed wet, longing for something she hadn't had in years.

"Spread it with your fingers. I want a really good look."

She reached down and spread it open. She could feel his breath on it, which was making her that much hotter.

"Mmmm, lovely. Now, beg me to fuck you. Ask me to lay with you and make you full."

She said, with feeling behind it. "Fuck me, my lord. Fuck me like I am yours."

She felt him climb on top of her. She felt his tip probing her wet nether lips before at last it slid all the way in. It had been so long since she had a cock in her that she began to lose her composure, moaning in genuine pleasure.

He held her close, his cock pumping her, while he kissed her neck. He wasn't just fucking her, she noted. He was making love. Poor young fool, what did you know of love? Probably couldn't tell it from obedience or fear.

Some part of her wanted to guide him, to show him what love could be, to make him truly a lover in full. Perhaps she would even become his queen.

But the rest of her, with both wisdom and experience, told her wait, and meanwhile enjoy the sex.

"Oh my lord! I can feel you so deep in me!" She strangled out in pleasure.

"Mmmh nnnh, Ms Crowefs," he moaned.

"Call me Slandra," she said, forgetting herself in the moment.

"Mmhhhh, Slandra, Slandraaa." She felt him pull up, lifting up her hips and putting a thick, soft pillow underneath them. She felt his strong hands holding her thighs as his cock went deeper and deeper, stirring up her spirit, testing the limits of her mind and her libido.

Already Almakanti started to leak pre into her. "I'm gonna cum, Slandra."

There was no fear here. She had seen her own future. Children never entered into it.

"Yes, cum inside me, Almakanti! Fill me with your seed!" and then she remembered something vital, and made to give a warning before a sudden thrust, pop, and sensation drove all syllables save one from her mouth. "AAAAAaaaaaaaaaaah~"

He was inside her, and cumming. She felt the semen enter her, and her womb accepting it all like an arroyo accepting the rain of a summer storm.

There was now panting, as the lord laid on her. "I... I am sorry," he managed to get out. "I forgot m-myself..."

"So did I, my lord" Slandra Crowefs said in return.

"Since we will be here a while, let me get us more comfortable." She felt him take her and position her so that they were both laying on their sides.

"Did you enjoy my payment, my lord?" She asked.

"I did. That was amazing. But it is not your full payment."

"Ah." Damn, she thought. She said. "I did not think it would be, my lord."

"So long as you are in my retainder and work for me, so long as you are my seer, you will attend me like this every night, willingly giving yourself to me. Who knows? Maybe more will come of this."

She felt him pull her close, then hold her in his arms. She almost cried in the afterglow. She had missed this.

Soon, she heard him start to snore. With nothing else to do for the next half hour, she decided to do some fortune telling for herself.

She comforted herself in the knowledge that this arrangement would only be a few more nights. She peered further into the future.

Well. That was surprising. Of all the futures this present could hold, she didn't expect to see that one.

Sleep tight, my good lord, she thought to herself as she reached her talons to pet him. He gave happy murmurs in his sleep.

In the morning, back at the tower, the three heroes were having breakfast. Hexby had insisted on contacting the public house back at the city of Querem to see whether the ghosts had indeed gone. The bartender had a bit of a shock at being contacted mentally like that, but was glad to express his gratitude for indeed having made the ghosts go away. He also relayed that they would be welcome to stay and eat at his pub whenever they wanted when they were next in town.

"As much as I wanna take him up on that offer," Thax said after swallowing a bit of bacon, "I have a different path for us. I've had a path revealed to me to end our quest very, very quickly."

"How fascinating. Was it conveyed to you by the Spirit of the Sword Axe as we slept together the previous night?" Hexby said.

Thax looked at him with an expression of both worry and being impressed. "How did you know that?"

"I am a wizard, after all, and we know much and sundry about the many magical artifacts and weapons that proliferate about the lands. Also, I am a light sleeper, and you talk in your sleep."

"I do? How come nobody's ever told me?"

"For what it's worth, Thax," Cut said, also nomming on bacon, "I'm a very heavy sleeper, so I couldn't have."

"Quite," Hexby said. "It was a wonder that I could hear Thax's somnic verbosity over your snoring. You should see the healers' guild about it; it has the worrying tones of sleep apnea."

"So what was it the Spirit told you, Thax?" Cut said, deciding getting the talk back on topic would be a very good idea before she threw coffee into Hexby's face.

"Oh, right! If we can wrangle it, there's a way we can get to where Almakanti is camped out before he ever makes it over the mountains. The Spirit says she's already contacted someone, though I'm not sure how."

"There are many ways a being on the ethereal plane can contact others, through magic," Hexby began before taking another gulp from his glass of orange juice. "However, I agree, I did not think it was possible for the Spirit of the Sword Axe to be in contact with anybody else. Many a codex and tome in the libraries of the University tell of artifacts like the Sword Axe, now long lost to the ravages of history, which only posessed the ability to make a link with one in physical contact with the artifact. There are exceptions, but since the Sword Axe was crafted a thousand years ago, I cannot think of any that would apply."

"Like what?" Thax prompted.

"There is only one bond that has more power than that between weapon and wielder, and that is the one between weapon and crafter. But with the intervening millenium, I doubt it. And this is even without the tales telling of the creators being swallowed by the wars, if the stories can be counted as true."

"I haven't had the heart to ask her. Or really the thinking about something other than the company she keeps, really."

"Boy I sure wish I had a handy spirit to keep me company in my dreams like you do, Thax." Cut said cuttingly.

"Hey, you want a turn, you only have to ask. I'm sure she'd like a change of pace."

Cut looked at her nearly empty plate. "I'm not sure I could. You said that those who were evil couldn't touch it, right? I wonder if what I've done would be enough to trigger that for me."

Thax said, with passion, "The very fact that you feel bad about what you did proves you aren't evil. Someone truly evil wouldn't care. And anyway, you never intended to follow through, right?"

"True... I wonder where my Cae Brae is..."

"So, Thax, you were saying about the flying beast?" Hexby said, trying to get the conversation back on track.

"Oh yeah. We should expect it at.. what time is it now?"

Hexby turned to look at the magical sundial that was in the floor pattern of the hall. Even when it was overcast or night, it showed the right time. It wasn't that difficult of a magic trick, but it was both impressive and practical.

"Eight of the dial, Thax, almost."

"Oh, good, that gives us an hour to get ready. We'll make several stops along the way since it won't be a machine, but we'll arrive at Almakanti's camp in five days."

"Five days?" Cut said with wonder. "It took us longer to ride from Tjordeaux to Querem on fresh ridersaurs!"

"Indeed. Let's finish up and get packing so we can take the transport when it arrives. I don't really know what to expect. Pack light, only what you can carry on you."

Soon, it was the appointed hour, and Hexby Spayth, Cut Lovingood, and Thax Homebred gathered on the roof to meet whatever or whoever would be carrying them the many, many leagues to Almakanti's camp.

"They're running a bit late," Cut said.

The winds blew around them as they each looked around at a third of the morning sky surrounding the tower.

"She intimated to you that the flying person or thing would arrive at this hour, Thax, did she not?" Hexby asked.

More silence, punctuated only by the whistling of the wind and the tinkling of the rather pleasant wind chimes Lonaldo had installed up here. They were very soothing.

"She said they'd be here, and they haven't arrived yet. They're running late alright." Thax said.

Joining the wind blowing through the air in the tower was their irritation at being stood up.

"I spy with my little eye something that starts with an O," said Cut, after a while.

"Oak tree," Thax said.

"Got it in one."

Out of the clouds overhead, there was a small speck on the horizon. The heroes could probably be forgiven for missing it, since they didn't have binoculars, and weren't used to looking out for things flying in.

"I maintain within my field of vision an object whose written name starts with the letter vulgarly known as R." Hexby said.

"Ridersaur," Thax guessed.

"It is not a ridersaur." Hexby answered.

"River? Is it river?" Cut ventured.

"No, it is not a river. That would be far too obvious."

"How are you holding up, by the way, Thax?" Cut asked.

"We're on good, solid stone, so that helps a lot. If I were closer to the edge, I might faint." Then a penny dropped. "Oh crap, crap! We're about to be flying! We'll be up high! Aaagh..."

"Thax! Focus! Find the object beginning with R!" Hexby quickly shouted.

"Okay, okay, calming down. Um, I think I saw some rose bushes towards the horizon."

"Are there?" Hexby asked. He shielded his eyes and focused on the horizon. "Ah, so there are. Very lovely. One does not usually see them bloom at this time of year. But no, that is not the object I was referring to."

"I think those were rhubarb fields over that way," Cut said. "Is it rhubarb?"

"No, it is not rhubarb. Do you all accede?"

"Yes, Hexby, now tell us what it was." Cut said a little shortly.

"Rurica Barbarens. It is a species of butterfly that flew by a few moments ago. It is migratory."

"That's kind of too hard to guess, Hexby," Thax said. He pointed at an approaching shape. "Now that, maybe we- WHAT IS THAT!?"

"My word!" Hexby exclaimed, watching the great flapping figure approaching towards the tower. "I thought those all went extinct five hundred years ago!"

"What is that, Hexby!?" Cut asked.

"It is a Great Flyersaur. It shares some ancestry with the fowlsaur and the peckersaur. There were stories of them serving to carry great warriors and the like to battle. The last one was thought to have died in captivity in a zoo."

"It's beautiful," Cut said.

Finally, the great beast roosted on a cornice of the tower's top. Off its back hopped a coyote in simple dress.

"Ah, so you're the heroes I've been told about. And there's the bearer of the Sword Axe right there, eh? Hexby Spayth, Cut Lovingood, and especially Thax Homebred, greetings." She bowed. Her hair was cut short just above the jawline, and around her neck, Thax could see a pendant that looked a lot like a miniature ingot of steel. "I am Ignacia Artifactforger the Thirty Third, direct descendant of Ignacia SwordAxeForger who originally made the Sword Axe. And this is my good friend Aeromnibus."

"Wow, so your ancestor forged the Sword Axe? I wondered who the spirit was talking about." Thax said.

"Let's just say that when you found the Sword Axe a while back, you immediately solved some centuries of familial bickering. We'd almost given up hope on somebody ever actually finding it." She pointed at her pendant. "This steel is from the same steel that the Sword Axe was forged out of, so we've been in direct contact with the Spirit of the Sword Axe all this time. Though admittedly, we haven't had much to talk about until now, and mostly passed the time during sleep before then."

"I'm glad to meet you in any case." Thax said. Cut and Hexby nodded to such.

"Anyway, if a couple of you could give me a hand?" She pulled a bunch of bamboo sticks from a pouch in the flyersaur's saddlebags. "Her saddle isn't made to hold more than one person, so if I'm going to transport you three, I'm going to have to use the passenger cage. Here, hold that end of this, would you?"

Thax moved to. "The passenger cage? So what, we'll be flying in a cage being carried by Aeromnibus?"

"Yeah something like that. Here, turn that this way, and insert this there. Except she won't be carrying it in her claws. They'd tire out eventually. No, you'll be suspended from a harness in a bamboo cage. Don't worry, it's super strong, and it'll hold ten times your weight easily, and the weight won't bother Aeromnibus much. It'll be like she was carrying marbles in her pockets or some such."

"I see, I-"

"No no! *This* goes here, then *that* goes there. Otherwise you get friction and you don't want that. Yeah, that's better. This is almost done. I need a third person on this. Cut, if you please?"

"Oh right!" Cut moved over to where Thax and Ignacia were holding the cage up to Aeromnibus's belly.

"Okay, you see those straps? You need to thread them through those parts of the cage on both sides. They cross eachother to make an x, okay? And remember, 'left over right will hold you tight; right over left will leave you bereft'. That's the way! You're really deft with your hands, girl! Okay, that's good."

They all sat down for a moment to catch their breath once the cage was assembled. It looked both light and sturdy, and would certainly hold all of them.

"Okay, let's get going. We've got to make Zaptha's Landing before nightfall if we're going to get there on time. If you'd all climb aboard?"

"Hexby, can you do something for me?" Thax asked as he got in.

"Of course, Thax." He replied.

"Do you know a spell that would put me to sleep? Only I think I really couldn't take the heights otherwise."

"I do. Are you sure? I would hate to not have your company during the flight."

"My company would be either screaming or puking. Do you still want that?"

"I understand. Once we are inside, I will cast the spell, and wake you when we arrive at Zaptha's Landing, and all our landings afterwards."

Once they were all in, Ignacia closed the door and tied a very secure knot to make sure it wouldn't come open mid flight. Hexby put a hand on Thax's shoulder while mumbling a few words, and Thax immediately sank into a deep sleep. 

Soon, Aeromnibus took off, flying as swiftly northwest as its wings would allow.

It was now later. The sun was setting in a fiery red and orange sky. Thax was roused from his deep sleep, and he immediately noticed that they were on a road in an open field.

"What's this?" He asked. "I thought we were going to go to Zapthar's Landing."

"We are," Ignacia said, "but do you think it'd really be a good idea to land a big flying thing right in the middle of a city full of people who think big flying things are extinct?"

"When you put it that way..." Thax mused.

"We'll just have to walk into town," Cut said. "It's not too far. Come on, if we start now, we can be in the city before nightfall."

"I too was surprised by this turn of events, Thax. I had hoped that this journey would not involve as much pedestrianism as is now apparent, but I am still grateful that I have been spared the further marring of my garments and feet by dust that would otherwise occurred on a longer journey." Hexby said.

"Oh, Thax, on sleeping?" Cut said, brightening as they started beating feet towards Zaptha's Landing, "Don't worry. We ended up sleeping a lot too. Not much else to do when we're in a small cage in the air."

"Indeed, we quickly depleted our stock of subjects with which to use for I Spy, and other verbal travelling games soon ran their course." Hexby added.

Zaptha's Landing was so called, because it was on the river, and their founder, Zaptha, used it as a landing for their river boats. It was a fairly well apportioned city, being a stop on the river trading stream. People came from the surrounding villages and thorpes to bring their trade goods to be sent up the river, where they hoped to find buyers.

By the time the heroes had reached the city, the sun had sunk below the horizon. The sky's orange was fighting a losing battle against the navy blue of the approaching night sky.

As they entered it, the city put Thax in mind of a staircase. It formed around the river bend, which was right next to the stone the city was built on. There were three steps on this staircase of the city: the bottom step was where the docks were, and where most of the stores, inns, and lower rent houses were; the middle step was where the nicer housing and the higher end shops and restaurants were; and the top step was mostly dominated by the castle and temples, though he also saw a pair of mansions on either side.

They were heading for the lowest step. They just needed to fill up on provisions and get a good night's rest before taking off again in the morning.

As they got closer to the bottom step, they could hear the sound of bass instruments and drums getting louder and louder as they approached the largest tavern, The River's Bend.

Once they finally got there, they understood why there was such loud music going on. They had walked into a big celebration. Were this an animated musical, doubtless everybody in the place would be dancing in refined broadway choreography spinning and wheeling as they sang about the hero of the night in whose honor they were throwing this soiree, and doubtless the hero himself would be providing main vocals as he strolled about the place.

Instead, they mostly sat at their tables, raising their mugs and tapping their feet to the music. Some danced, certainly. But the hero of the night, the one everybody was celebrating, had a table front and center to the rest of the tavern.

There were two at this table, but it was very obvious which one was the hero. Off to the side was a squirrel gentleman who was tuning his lute, though how he could hear his instrument over the general din was a mystery. But the other guy?

He was a lion. A big lion. Thax reckoned that if he stood up, Thax would only come up to his chest, if that. His face was handsome, stunning. He had a jaw you could angle grind with, and his blue eyes sparkled like sapphires. His mane was firey gold, and his fur a paler gold. He was in gleaming armor from the face down, so shiny they reflected every bit of light. You could use the abs of his breastplate as a shaving mirror.

And unlike most cases where the armor was an exaggeration, this guy was the real deal. He really did have the huge muscles his breastplate suggested. And he saw, leaning against the table, a huge greatsword, sheathed, with a red hilt.

This lion saw Thax and company entered, and put his hands up for silence. "Friends and fellow city folk, stay your instruments! We have new people joining our celebration! Hello! What are your names?" He said all of this with a voice just bursting with heroism and sexual magnetism. Was it any doubt that most of the women and some of the men in the tavern couldn't take their eyes off him?

Thax gave a nervous wave. "Hi, I'm Thax Homebred, and these are my friends Cut Lovingood, Hexby Spayth, and Ignacia. We're just passing through; don't stop on our account."

"No, of course, I just want to extend my welcome to you. As for me," he mugged to the people around the tavern, waving his arms in a "come on" gesture, "who am I?"

And everyone chorused "Popular Boohs!"

"Why don't you pull up a chair and have a drink and a meal, my treat, while my friend here tells you who I am and why we're here tonight? Take it away, Mr. Nutz!"

The squirrel looked down at his feet as the applause went on for a few moments. "Now now, Popular Boohs, I keep telling you, Mr. Nutz was my father. *Please*, call me Deez." He took an experimental strum of his lute's strings to see whether they were in tune. "Anyway, since we have new people here, let's give them the story, shall we?" Immediately the chords began, and he launched into song:

On Zaptha's Landing some five years before,
Everyone worried and fretted well sore.
The pirates had sailed down the river that day.
They kidnapped for ransom demanded we pay.
Who rose to the moment when they got the news?
Popular, Popular, Popular Boohs!

He cut down their leaders like nautical trees,
And soon all the pirates were down on their knees.
He sent them away with their heads in their hands,
So that never again would he darken these lands.
Who made a short work of our piracy blues?
Popular, Popular, Popular Boohs!

And that was the start of a hero career
That only grew shinier year after year.
The raiders would raid and the thieves would all thieve,
But soon as he heard he would make them to grieve,
Who is it that's sure to pay evil their dues?
Popular Popular Popular Boohs!

The tempo of the song slowed down now for the big finish, as the big bright chords now became small, softer ones, and the voice went from boistrous singing to softer notes:

We're all here tonight for a thankful soiree
Cause a band of vile whelps took our children away
Who knows what ill purpose they wanted them for?
But when Boohs heard the news, why, he showed them the score!
Who brought them all back and then bought them new shoes?

And the whole tavern exploded with:

POPULAR POPULAR POPULAR BOOHS!

Everyone burst into applause, even Thax, who wasn't used to such good theater, and Cut, who enjoyed a good show. Even Hexby gave an appreciative nod.

Ignacia, however, was very quiet.

They tucked into their meal. It was mostly fish and other such from the river and the fields nearby, but it was delicious. The drinks were also fine. The celebration went on as the sun sank further beyond the horizon and night finally took hold.

"I got us a room," Cut said. "When you're ready, it's upstairs, third door on the right. Though tonight I think I'll be getting to know our fine hero."

"Really, Cut?" Thax said with a surprised look on his face. "I didn't think he was your type."

"He's not, but he wants to get to know me, so I figure what the hell."

"Well I slept all the way here, so I think I'll go out for a walk. Maybe I'll do a little stargazing."

"I, however, shall take my leave and enter the lodgings you have secured for us," Hexby said. "I have to prepare my spells for tomorrow, and I have a few spells that shall make our trip tomorrow not be as monotonous."

Thax was at the door when he turned around. "Hey, Hexby, I just had a thought. Do you have a spell that will put walls around the outside of the flight cage and make it look like we're somewhere nice on the ground? Like a carriage or something?"

Hexby pondered on the question for a bit. "I think I may have something that will allow that effect, yes. If it means we have your awake company, then I would be happy to prepare that spell in addition to the others."

"I'm out to get some fresh air. You guys stay out of trouble, okay? Have fun, Cut!"

Thax walked around outside. The stars and moon were bright tonight. If you were seeing this in a film, you could be forgiven for thinking it was a day to night shot. He saw that he wasn't the only one who wanted some fresh air and a good view of the river. There were plenty of other people around him, talking, flirting, doing all kinds of other things around him. He decided to just walk around and see what he could see, hear what he could hear.

He reflected on Popular Boohs. He had looked and sounded like what he always imagined heroes were supposed to be. Before he'd even realized it, he was a hero himself, though he didn't really feel like it. He felt like a horse boy in a magical loincloth. He wasn't all that strong, nor all that fast or smart, but thanks to the chance finding of a magical artifact, here he was, about to take on the greatest threat to the world.

He felt so alone.

"-weren't for how much he paid I wouldn't have." somebody said, piercing trough Thax's self doubt and wallowing. "Nobody likes it when their kids get taken, yeah?"

"Look at it this way: they weren't harmed, they had a nice pizza party, and they got new shoes when they went home, right? No harm done." Somebody else said.

Thax discreetly looked around to see who was talking. It was a pair of nondecripts nearby. He made like he was looking for a dropped coin while he kept listening.

"Even so, it's a good thing nobody actually saw us or our faces, yeah? I mean, sure, playing the raider or the pirate for him is all well and good, nice clean fun, but when you involve kids into it, I dunno..."

"It's like the man himself said, you have to keep raising the stakes if you want to be a believable hero. Blowed if I know what he's going to do next year, though."

"Even so, I do wish *we* got some of the credit. I mean, without us, would he be sitting in there having songs sung about him that everyone joins in on? No sir. He'd still be the baron's shit son."

"Yeah. Can't say I blame him, though. If I had the baron breathing down my neck day in and day out about making something of meself, I'd be in dire straits too."

"Here, did you hear someone running off really heavily just now?"

"Went and knocked over the barrel over there, too. I hope he found his coin, whoever that was. So anyway, about that sports team..."

Meanwhile, back at The River Bend, in a very nicely apportioned room, a more undressed Popular Boohs sat on his bed. He was out of his armor now, and down to just his pants. Sure enough, his armor had been entirely accurate. He had muscles for days, build like an olympian. And in his pants was a sizable bulge that showed he was well built in other places.

On the other side of the room, there was a clothes blind set up, where Cut was struggling. When he asked her to come up to his room for a little privacy, she had no idea this is what he had in mind. She pondered as she struggled to figure out the workings of this whether she would have refused had she known.

"Are you going to be much longer, my dear?" Boohs asked.

"I've never worn stuff like this before. Give me a moment. I've almost got it."

Finally, after a bit more struggling, the kitty girl walked out from behind the screen, to Popular Boohs's very apparent delight.

The thief had been transformed into a princess. Let us wander our eyes down Cut, from tip to toe. At the top of her head is a tiara, very flashy, but what Cut knew to be made from false gold and glass gems.

Further down is her dress. It is made in standard princess pattern, what with the long gloves, lace and brocade, billowing bell shaped skirt. It was green. Cut had some trouble fitting into it. She had to support her gifted curves a bit better than usual for it all to fit easily.

Costume jewelry bedecked her neck and fingers. It too was faux gold and faux gems, and was very flashy. It caught the shine of the lights like anything.

"Why verily forsooth milord," Cut said in a sensual tone of voice, "we doth be most grateful for thine right well timed rescue of an innocent young maiden princess like myself. How ever shall I repay you?"

"Eeeeeeeeeee you're so pretty~!" Popular Boohs let out, dignity forgotten in his exctement.

"Verily, doth I be sufficient a pretty pretty princess for thee?" She said as she sashayed over to him.

"Thou doth beeist so," he said. "I request a boon: wouldst thou bestow thine royal blessings upon mine lordly rod?"

"Such a boon is fair well what a fine hero such as thyself shouldst be rewardedeth with." Cut cleared her throat. "Um, Boohs? Do I have to keep going with the whacked out vocabluary?"

"Not if you don't want to. It can be hard to keep it up"

"Good." She took his pants and pulled them down. He was no Thax, but he was certainly well apportioned. She was relieved not to see any barbs anywhere. As nice as they could be if you were in the mood for them, it was nice not to have to figure on getting poke painfully in tender places.

"My, and such a lordly rod it is..." She took the tip into her mouth, her tongue licking the tip all around. She took the whole shaft into her mouth now, while her hand gave much needed attention to his balls. It was always important to give those attention.

Boohs moaned in appreciation, placing his hands on her shoulders. "Oooh, you certainly have a royal tongue,"  he managed to get out.

Soon, Cut pulled off of the lion's cock and bent over on the bed, pulling up her princessy skirt. Underneath it she had fishnet stockings up past her knees, but other than that there was no underwear.

"For your services to the kingdom, my lord, you may take my royal pussy. Your stock should result in good, strong heirs that will bring this kingdom to a golden age." She wiggled her butt for emphasis.

Just before Boohs could claim his royal reward, however, there was a knock at the door. Not a genteel knock, but a strong knock, a knock that said to anybody who heard it that the knocker *was* going to be on the other side of that door, even if it entailed the door itself getting kicked down.

Cut got up, straightening her skirt. "I'm still dressed enough I'll see who it is. you wait behind the blinds."

The lion swiftly went to hide. Cut strode up to the door and opened it a crack to see who it was.

It was Thax, whose anger was briefly replaced by surprise. "Uh... nice outfit, Cut." He shook his head clear. "Listen, is Boohs in there? We need to have a very serious talk about what kind of hero he is."

"*Sigh*. You had better have a really good excuse because I was about to exercise my royal privilege in there."

"Boohs hired people to kidnap children so he could rescue them."

The sheer silence of complete and total shock was interrupted by the sound of stumbling and falling coming from inside the room.

"Habba ga darga ya dunno noffin" Boohs got out as he struggled to disentangle himself from the clothes blind and Cut's discarded outfit and such.

Thax pushed in, not even blinking at Boohs's nudity. "I know plenty. Your henchmen should really stop being so talkative in public. I saw their faces, and I'm sure I can find them again. They also seem to be bandits and pirates and whatever else you pay them to be. Strange, isn't it?"

And now Popular Boohs was in the face of a stern expression from Thax and a livid expression from Cut. You couldn't win out against that, especially when you were sitting naked on the floor.

"Okay, okay! It's true, I did hire people to pretend to attack the city so I could save it, but nobody got hurt! Everyone had a celebration, everyone got to have a little fun. And the kids weren't gone very long, and they were well taken care of. That wasn't even my idea, but it's just expected that the things you deal with as a hero get more and more serious."

"Why did you do it?" Cut asked, her anger a bit mollified at seeing how pathetic this lion was.

"Because my dad kept pressuring me to be this hero. 'Boohs', he'd tell me, 'when I was your age I was fighting bandits left and right, and I was leading people in armies and doing all kinds of things, why aren't you?' and I'd try to tell him things are peaceful here and I can't very well fight things that don't exist. It got unbearble. Finall I came up with an idea that'd shut him up.

"It was just going to be a one time thing. Some friends of mine did really good pirate impressions and they came along and gave the people a little scare. They didn't really do anything, just few a black flag and waved swords and shouted a bit. And then I came and waved my sword at them, and I 'defeated' them, and hooray, the hero won.

"Then my father started asking me what I'd do next. Every year I tried to think up something else and every year it was never enough! When one of my people suggested the kids thing, I thought here, here *finally* was something that might satisfy him, but I get the feeling even that won't."

The lion put his head in his hands. "So here you have it. I'm no hero. I'm just a shit son."

Thax couldn't bring himself to be angry at him anymore. Suddenly, a strange idea hit him. "Well, how would you like to be a hero?"

Boohs raised his head from his hands. "What do you mean?"

"Thax, what are you doing?" Cut asked him.

Thax patted the pretty princess to push her to be quiet a second. "You want to be a hero, right Boohs? Well, we happen to be on a quest to stop Almakanti, the greatest threat to the world. We could use all the help we could get, and I'm pretty sure even your dad will accept helping save the entire world as perfectly satisfactory. And if he doesn't? Forget it."

"You'd do that? You'd trust me enough to be on your team after all that?" Boohs said in disbelief.

"You don't look to me like you're that bad a guy. You just need to prove yourself. And what better way to do that? Though I have to impress, we're going right into danger. The lion's den, no pun intended. There's a very real chance we might not all come back from this. It's your decision to make."

Boohs didn't even have to think about it very long. "I accept. I'll be ready to go in the morning."

Cut fixed the clothes screen and started changing back into her normal clothes. "Pack light. We'll have fast transport that isn't capable of carrying much. We'll be leaving righ at twilight. Are you any good with that greatsword we saw you with?"

"Very. I was the best in the academy with it. Got the gold in dueling and group combat three years in a row." Boohs said with some pride.

"Let's hope all that dueling will help you for real. It's a genuinely brave thing you're doing, joining us," Cut said. "Be ready before sunrise. It'll be a bit of a walk to our transport."

As she left out the door with thax, she looked back at Boohs. "If you prove truly brave, I'll be your princess again." Wink.

Soon it was the next day. The sun brought indirect light to Zaptha's Landing, not quite being over the horizon yet, but even if it had been it'd still have  some hours before it appeared over the city's highest step.

Out of The River Bend walked four figures. The public on the inside shouted cries of goodbye. Boohs had explained that there was a great threat and that he wa going to take off with this band of heroes to fight it. He said that they had to be brave, and that Deez Nutz would be a suitable replacement until he got back.

The four eventually rounded the bend, and Boohs's eyes opened really, really wide. "Holy forefathers, I thought those went extinct!"

"They did," Ignacia said. "Aeromnibus is the last of her kind. I guess you're coming with us, Golden Boy?  The more the merrier, I guess."

At that moment, from the bushes nearby, an explosion of nets and ropes fired out and flew towards the flyersaur and the rest. Some quick sidestepping by Thax and Cut, with Thax pulling Hexby out of the way and Cut shoving Boohs, made sure only Ignacia was caught, who wasn't used to the faster pace of adventures, and didn't have anybody left to help her dodge. She was far from helpless though.

The flyersaur tore off the nets surrounding her like they were so much wet tissue paper.

Cut drew her Serrulate Scissors, Boohs pulled out his greatsword, and Thax pulled out the Sword Axe in dual wielding mode. Hexby raised his hands, wreathed in the flame of powerful magics.

From the bushes all around came the people in black armor. Almakanti's forces? Here?

"The hell!?" Thax said in surprise. "I thought you twerps were still behind the Mountains of Petteritan!"

"The bulk are, true," one said, "but do you think Almakanti wouldn't have the foresight to leave some cells of his forces everywhere?"

One of the ones in black, whom Thax just now noticed was in black robes and a mask instead of armor, raised their hands. "With my spell of weaving protection, your weapons will have a much harder time against us! You're running on normal now!" Sure enough, for a quick second, it looked like all of the Almakanti troops were ensconced in barely visible transparent bubbles for a few seconds.

"Welp, Boohs," Thax said, bracing himself to atttack, "this is where you prove yourself. If we don't stop them, we won't get to the mountains in time."

Boohs gave a roar and swung his greatsword above his head. "Today will be a day of regret the rest of your lives! This is the day you face Popular Boohs!"

The forces of Almakanti looked at eachother.

"Never heard of you," said one.

Boohs sagged for a moment, but then rallied magnificently, hefting his sword into both hands. "Then watch and learn."

Like the force of an overladen wagon careening down a steep hill, Boohs dashed off towards the dark armored group. Another leonine roar came out, and he swung his greatsword with great force at the one in the lead, who just barely had time to beat the swing aside with his own sword, which he then dropped because his arm went numb from the vibration. Boohs kicked it away, and made to swing again before the guy made a surrendering gesture and ran off.

He turned and faced another swordsman, and suddenly was aware that Thax had his back. "I'll take the three over here," Thax said, "while you take those three over there."

"I don't think I've ever felt this alive before," Boohs said, his heart pounding in his chest.

"Good. Hold onto that feeling, and use it like a cudgel against these guys!"

For Thax's part, he felt he was starting to get the feel of it. Now that it was a more even match, he had to rely on his footwork a lot more. Steel clashed against steel. More than a couple of times, the Axe Shield saved him when he brought it about to halt stabs.

Boohs was a whirlwind of lion and steel. His hugeness meant that any poor fool who actually caught a smack of his sword was ringing the rest of the day. Boohs had been trained to use *all* of the sword in combat, as well as his body. Not only did they have to watch out for his blade, but also the hilt, the pommel, and even his fists and natural claws.

Cut had abandoned the fight entirely, choosing to use her scissors to free Ignacia and Aeromnibus instead. Here in the open plains, her own fighting style wouldn't work. She relied on surprise and stealth, for the most part, and they'd already seen her, and that spell of protection meant her Serrulate Scissors would just bounce off.

Hexby, however, engaged the Almakanti Mage in a magician's duel. Such were often parts of the university experience, but Hexby had lucked out before this point. He didn't focus on defeating his magical foe, but instead making it so that he couldn't  further aid his comrades. Great waves of colors and shapes and visions fired off in between the two of them, not actually tangling concrete spells, but making their respective magical forces duel directly. This was the pinnacle of the art, and only Hexby's innate bit of talent was keeping the more experienced Almakanti Mage from winning. But Hexby wasn't playing to win.

Thax saw that the bubbles around his opponents were weakening with his every strike, so he thought he'd try to wear them down even faster. Jumping back, he brought the two halves of the Sword Axe back together and called the Long Blade back into existence. He quickly discovered that when he tried to fire a bolt of force while swinging, that made an intense arc of light that cut right across them, knocking back all three of his opponents at once. One dropped their sword, and a quick second beam made sure they couldn't pick it back up, unless they wanted to try picking up molten metal slag.

Boohs, meanwhile, was starting to get out of breath. His armor had dents. His mane was messed up. His sword, however, was still wielded with great efficiency, and his three opponents were having a very hard time of it indeed. Their swords were notched, their armor was creaking, and they too were starting to feel exhausted.

"Do you yield to the great and Popular Boohs!?" he shouted, his leonine roar adding volume.

As one, they all dropped their swords and started walking off.

The other three Thax was fighting dropped what was left of their weapons, and ran off too.

"Worthy opponent!" Hexby called. "Your comrades have abandoned you. Surrender and you will be spared."

The wizard made no reply, keeping up the magical tangle they were in, like a great invisible arm wrestling match with the most impressive pyrotechnics. Boohs and Cut hung back, Cut from practical experience, and Boohs from knowledge he'd gained in his training. Never interfere in a wizard's duel.

Too bad Thax never knew about this. Sword Axe sheathed, he moved for the all black Almakanti Mage.

"Thax, wait!" Cut shouted, a bit too late as Thax smacked the wizard in the back of the neck. They fell over, a bolt of magic ricocheting off of Thax's protected body (while still knocking him back) and hitting Boohs, knocking him square off his feet.

Cut and Hexby dashed straight for Thax and Boohs, who'd fallen together thanks to the influences of the rogue magic. They went to Thax first, pulling him to his feet as he shook his head.

"You idiot! Never interrupt a mage duel! Who knows what could have happened!" Cut shouted. "Are you okay?"

"Not so loud, I think I have a headache. I reckon the Sword Axe's blessing protected me from most of that."

"Then come quickly and help us rescuscitate Popular Boohs," Hexby said. "It seems he bore the brunt of that randomized shard of magical power.

With the combined strength of all three of them, Popular Boohs was upright again. The lion's face looked different somehow. "Help me... get my breastplate off... it's jammed tight on me..." Boohs's strained voice called out.

Cut rose to the occasion. Her legendarily nimble fingers immediately got to the task of undoing the lion's armor. In a time that would probably have been a world record had somebody with a stopwatch been witnessing it, the breastplate, battered and dented, was right off.

And what was underneath came as something of a shock.

"Thank you- huh. What's wrong with my voice? What's going on? Why are you staring at me like that?" Boohs looked down. "And why do I have a really nice pair of breasts now?"

Thax and Cut were both reeling from the surprise and in frank admiration of the new Boohs. Hexby, however, was ready.

"Magic can be incredibly wild and unrestrained. It seems your gender has been swapped. You now occupy a female form."

Boohs, to his- er, her credit, was taking this in stride. "I did always wonder what it would be like. Is this permanent?"

"It usually is not. This is a common phenomenon in university, and normal affairs usually assert themselves before dawn the next morning. If I may, however." He reached into his robes and pulled out a very strange device that looked like a sex aid for very kinky air traffic control towers. It had a lot of lights and swingy things on it. He wove it around the air, and then close to the transformed Boohs.

"13.437 millimagickas above background. It is already starting to dissipate. By the time we reach the next point of call tonight, you shall be back to your normal self."

Boohs was now on her feet, quite nude. "I'd rather not travel naked if I don't have to, though. I don't think my clothes will fit anymore."

Hexby smiled, put away the strange contraption, and pulled out a wand that had a purple piece of string tied to one end. "Worry not, I carry this wand for just such occasions where clothing is necessary, but not available." And sure enough, with a wave and a point, Boohs was dressed in nicely fitting, simple but pleasing clothing, which neither called attention to nor pulled attention from her newly muscular and curvy body.

"It is a wand I constructed as part of my university tests. I call it Hexby's Wand of Enclothement. The clothes it generates are permanent, and can be made in any pattern one can imagine. You can take them off and store them afterwards just like any other suit of clothing. I keep it on hand in case my  robe is irreparably spoiled and I have need of new raiment."

"Thanks," Boohs said in earnest, picking up her greatsword and slinging it around her shoulders. "So I guess we should get going, yes?"

"Yes. I prepared a spell last night that will do much to speed our travels on the way to deal most finally with our dread foe, Almakanti," Hexby said. "With your permissions, Ignacia and Aeromnibus?"

"Fine. Just know, you harm her, I'll have your head," Ignacia said in reply, pulling off the last of the netting from where it clung onto the great flyersaur.

Hexby laid a hand onto the great flying lizard and mumbled some words. A brilliant bright sheen flashed all the way up it, like somebody shining a flashlight through a slot and moving it from feet to face. "I have imparted haste upon this creature. It should now be able to move three times as fast as it could before."

"Hey," Cut said, "That means we'd get there in just a day and a bit! How come you didn't cast this the first day?"

"I did not know we would be conveyed by a living creature. It only works on creatures and beings. It does not work at all on machinery."

Everyone boarded. The flight cage wasn't all that comfortable, but when what it was doing was keeping you from being a flne splat at the bottom of a good mile's fall, it didn't need to be.

"You said you have a spell prepared that will make this flight go more smoothly?" Thax asked.

"Quite," Hexby replied. "Once we are in the air, we shall join hands, and I shall cast the spell. Our comfort will be greatly increased. It is a variation of a spell I composed for my senior thesis upon achieving the first level of wizardhood."

"You sure do make a lot of spells," Cut said.

"Naturally. It would be a poor wizard indeed who could only read spells. Our curriculum focuses on writing spells as well, so that the engine of creation may run unabated. Some spells may even improve the lot of all personkind."

The crew piled into the flight cage, which was once again secured very tightly, and they were off. Boohs marvelled at how the ground fell away, everything shrinking as they flew upwards.

"Gaaah cast it quick before I lose it!" Thax said, frantically grabbing Cut and Hexby's hands on either side. Once all hands were joined, Hexby mumbled some words, there was a pleasant amber flash...

...and they were in a room, an oblong box, with couches and a table and bookshelves. The four looked around marvelling. It was a pleasant room, all mahogany and red velvet with some metalwork trim here and there. There were windows, too, which let in light and which seemed to match their flight.

"Wow, this is swanky," Cut said. "How'd you get us here from the flight cage?"

"This is no real place," Hexby explained. "We are all sort of in a collective dream. If one looks out the window, they will see the journey as it goes on the outside, but in here we have a nice, steady place where we can all relax, read, or play games, or whatever else we wish to do. I invented this spell to make carriage rides much less trying. I call it Hexby's Comfortable Traincar."

"I'm noticing I'm still female," Boohs groused.

"Ah. I had to leave out a few things to save on the cost of casting the spell. Otherwise this would be too high a spell level for a wizard of my level to cast. So you are here what you are outside in the world. My apologies."

"And how long are we in here?" Thax asked.

"As long as we want to be. You can leave the spell any time. One merely has to walk out of the door at the front, and they will be back where they were when the spell was cast. I would not recommend you doing so now, Thax, as we are very high up at the moment."

Hexby moved towards the shelves. "Would any of you like to play a game? There are playing cards, board games, dice games, plenty of ways to occupy ourselves until we arrive at our destination."

"Actually," Boohs said, somewhat embarassed, "I was wondering whether I could explore this new body of mine before it goes away."

Thax looked at her. Now that she was indeed a she, she was quite the woman. She was every bit as muscular as she was beforehand. The only real differences were bits of facial geometry, a pair of big ample breasts, wider hips, a bigger butt, and bigger thighs. And having a vagina where a cock had been, of course.

"If we slip off our clothes here," Thax asked Hexby, "do we do so outside?"

"No," Hexby answered. "Outside we are completely immobile. Any wardrobe changes stay in here."

Thax's loincloth hit the floor. Cut's clothing and Boohs's new dress followed right afterwards.

Hexby sighed. "When you are ready to do something else, I shall be right here." He selected a rather thick tome, moved to one of the couches, and started reading.

At the couch where the other three sat, Thax and Cut flanked Boohs on either side. Each snugged in close next to her, one of her breasts in each of their hands as they nuzzled her.

"Goodness," Boohs said, "I never thought they could be so tender. No wonder one likes a good groping."

"Well yeah," Cut said, "they're erogenous zones, there just happens to be more there for us. So you like that?"

"It's certainly bringing new sensations," Boohs admitted.

"I'll just bet," Cut replied, slinking down to the floor and spreading Boohs's legs wide. "Oh my, what a cute flower you have down here, mind if I taste it?"

"Before, I might have taken some acceptance with anything between my legs getting described as cute, but today I think I'll forget it."

"That's the spirit." Cut started licking at Boohs's wet lips. She'd been in the mood for her own for a while now, and she wasn't going to let the opportunity go by without taking it.

Boohs let out a surprised gasp at first, but was soon quite enjoying it, and placed an appreciative hand on Cut's head.

Suddenly, Boohs was aware of an equine cock in front of her. "Um, while she's taking care of you, why don't you take care of me?" Thax suggested.

Boohs didn't quite know what was going on in her to make her do it, but without saying anything, she started licking and sucking on his cock. She wasn't quite used to it, but Boohs was always one to rise to a challenge.

"Wow, would you look at that? You're a natural!" without thinking about it, Thax suddenly pushed his cock in a little.

Boohs's eyes bulged, and she swiftly pushed Thax away, collapsing into a fit of hacking coughs.

"Oops, sorry Boohs, I forgot you weren't used to that."

"'Salright," she said once she got her breath back. "Why don't you put that thing somewhere where it won't choke me?"

Just at that moment, Cut surfaced, licking her lips appreciatively. "I think she's ready for it, Thax."

At the other couch, Hexby had put the book aside and was playing solitaire. He just about had all the cards out, and was just on the edge of getting Aces High like he was aiming for.

Boohs laid back on the couch, her head on Cut's lap, her legs spread, as Thax got into position. The lioness was holding hands with them both.

"Remember," Cut said sweetly, "You're the one in control here. When you want or need him to stop, just say it. If you can't talk, squeeze our hands tight a few times and we'll know what you mean, okay?"

"Okay," she said nervously. "I mean, it's not everyone who can say that they've lost their virginity twice." She suddenly had a thought. "Say, Hexby, if we're hurt here, are we hurt outside too?"

"Yes," he called back, irritatedly shuffling the cards back together after another unsuccessful game of Aces High, "I believe the term is 'psychosomatic'. Not that anything here can hurt you much." He dealt four cards and moved a couple to a discard pile.

"And it won't hurt," Thax said gently, "unless you think it will. You're really wet down there. Now just take nice deep breaths and relax."

Thax placed his hands on Boohs's rock hard abs, taking a moment to appreciate them. "Wow, when we're done here, you need to let me in on your workout routine."

"Would you stop teasing the poor girl and just stick it in her?" Cut said sharply, with the lioness nodding her agreement with the sentiment.

"Okay, here goes." He pressed the tip against the waiting hole, and then gently, gently applied pressure, listening to the leonine hardbody pant as he finally got the head in, and carefully, gently slid the rest in, inch by inch, until to his astonishment it all went in.

"How ya doing, Miss Popular?" Thax asked, a little teasingly.

"This... oh I wish I were a poet..." was the reply.

"You're very tight. I'm going to start moving, okay? Here goes."

Slowly at first, and soon quickly, Thax thrusted. He wondered just how he was getting laid so much now that he was an adventurer out on the field. It was like he'd made some unconscious wish that had been granted with all the powers of gravity.

All the squeals and moans and squirming from Boohs was turning him on something fierce. Boohs, who wasn't used at all to having that equipment, was the first to give, showering Thax's lap with her fluids.

"Oooh, another squirter! I like a squirter. Mmnh, speaking of..." and with a few more final thrusts, he came inside Boohs, the quick, warm sensation of horse semen filling her giving her a great sense of peace that seemed to radiate out through her entire body.

Thax collapsed onto Boohs, whom he correctly figured could take it. Boohs put her strong arms around him and held him tightly.

"Mmm, Thax, that was the best sex I'd ever had. I'm such a lucky guy to have had tha taccident so I could experience that."

"Whew, yeah, and good thing this is a collective dream, so there's no real mess."

After they all caugh their breath, they sat up.

"So now what do you guys want to do?" Cut said.

Thax and Boohs looked at each other. Thax called over to Hexby, "You still want to play a game? Want to play some cards?"

Hexby looked over with surprise quickly turning into a bright smile. "I thought you'd never ask!"

Several games each of poker, rummy, bridge, oh hell, eucre, and several board games later, they were finally arriving at the mountain town, which had a new sign wherewithal they learned the name of the place at last, which was the somewhat disappointingly named Sword Axe Pass.

As they landed, Boohs felt a strange, sudden sensation, and found his body was back to normal.

"Oh, I'm back to my old self again," he said with a note of disappointment. "It would have been hard to explain, but I did enjoy it."

Hexby gave a somewhat uncharacteristic pat on the back. "If it would please you, my friend, tonight I shall work on a small trinket that will let you flick back and forth between the forms you have assumed. Your body has some memory, so the transformation will come easier and easier as time wears on. This helps me, in addition, because I have need to keep myself thoroughly unrusted on my enchantments and artifact making."

Boohs smiled. "Thanks, I'd like that."

Everyone started milling towards the door in the front of the car, and soon the four were awake back in the outside world, where Ignacia was letting them out of the cage. "Wow, whatever that spell is, that made it a nice, quiet flight. And that other spell made it a quick one! Wasn't expecting to be here so soon."

"We're on the last legs of our quest, guys," Thax said. "I can feel it in my bones. It's almost over. Let's get into town, get our supplies, get relaxed, and get ourselves ready."

And the four started down the road. Sword Axe Pass awaited them. What changes would they find there? Would Thax take Boohs and Hexby to the hot springs? What would Cut get up to?

The answers to these would have to wait, for on the other side of the mountains, Almakanti and his men were still clearing the pass. Even with the help of great magic and all the force they could spare, they were only a quarter of the way through clearing it.

Even now, there was a rock chain going. The soldiers at the front worked at the blockages with picks and mattocks, and the rocks were passed down chains of men, where the mages used them as raw material to pave a new road through. If he was going to clear the pass, Almakanti had felt, why not leave it in better shape than he'd found it?

He took some pride in the wide mountain road. Six carts could go through at a time across the road with room to spare. Once they were all the way through, there would be much more trade between the two halves of the continent. This could be a gift of world peace, one that might convince nations to ally with him willingly.

Thus far, the conquering had been hard work. He'd taken the army everywhere, just because that's what was expected. You had to have an army to go around conquering. Otherwise you just looked silly, and if there's one thing Almakanti never wanted to do, it was look silly.

Even so, the army was mostly for show. It was negotiation and deals and bloodless revolutions that had built what he'd called his empire. His father probably would have sneered at his chosen methods, but don't knock them, they worked.

He stood, watching the labor go on, Mrs. Crowefs at his side, as he requested she be from now on. He often had a hand on her, almost as if she were a support he was leaning on. It caused a lot of talk through the camps, but neither of them minded much.

"I am pleased that you are happy with this road, my lord." Mrs. Crowefs said.

"Hopefully it will be something that lasts beyond my reign, Slandra. Someday in the future, countless people will walk and ride along this road who will never have heard my name."

"Ah, yes. About the future, lord. The shape of it has changed, I am afraid. Those who shall come against you have gained some kind of boon. I am not certain how, but they shall arrive here tomorrow."

Almakanti made a great sigh. "I was hoping I would have more time to prepare. Let them come if and when they will. I will make them cease this fruitless striving against me. Then who knows? Perhaps this road will finish being built. I hope to see it."

Suddenly there was a great commotion up on the rock piles, and the soldiers were running away in droves. Was it an avalanche? Almakanti took out the paired telescopes that had been a gift from his generals and looked closer.

No! There were great living shapes that the rocks were putting themselves into.  Quickly a dozen of the animate stone beasts stood up and started striding towards the soldiers, who were fleeing madly as rocks were flung their way.

"Damn! They've awoken the Rock Boys. I'd dreaded this." Almakanti put away the twin telescope device and waved over a sergeant. "Sergeant, escort Mrs. Crowefs back to my tent. Keep her safe. I'm counting on you."

The sergeant did a smart salute. "Yes, milord!" He took her by the wing. "This way, ma'am. We'll soon be there."

When Almakanti was sure they were safely away, he pulled out  what looked like a plain wooden rod, like half a broomstick, from a holder on his belt. He held it before him, and it expanded out into a spear. The Sessile Spear, to be precise. Getting a hold of it wasn't an easy task; the relic place had already been thoroughly ransacked when they arrived. It was fortunate that in its dormant state, the Spear looked so boring and inconsequential that nobody thought to take it with them.

He wondered how the troops he'd left to rebuild the relic house were doing. He'd drawn up the plans himself. The new one would not only be delightfully attractive while keeping the spirit of the old one, but much more secure.

He shook himself out of his musings and held the spear high. "Generals, to me! We have to stop the Rock Boys before anybody gets hurt!"

And forward the four great, armored heads of the Almakanti Empire went. Almakanti bore the Sessile Spear, General Cyan bore the Rigorous Ranseur, General Magenta bore the Decaform Dagger, and General Yellow bore the Captivating Crossbow with a full quiver of Burdening Bolts.

Almakanti shouted the order to any stragglers in the valleys near the Rock Boys. "Fall back! Everyone who doesn't have a legendary weapon, fall back! Bear anybody hurt to the healers! Move!"

The soldiers scattered. There were a few who'd been battered by the rocks, but thankfully they merely seemed bruised. They made their withdrawal, with one spirited soldier shouting "Reduce those  rocks to rubble, Lord Almakanti!"

Once the soldiers had safely fallen back, one nudged another and said, "Take it in, bud, this is something you don't get to see very often."

Almakanti took his position, bracing stance with spear pointed at the Rock Boys overhead. "Alright, Generals, you know what you're doing. Just like we played the rogue grazersaurs! There's energies between the stones! Aim for them!"

General Cyan charged the rocks. The Ranseur's powers were only unlocked if you were constantly moving. It was tiring, but spending so much time in heavy armor had conditioned him well. Thrusts and parries amongst the huge rock monstrosities, with the length of the weapon, allowed him to lever the rocks out of whatever strange field was holding them together.

The Decaform Dagger that Magenta wielded could swiftly become ten when thrusted or slashed in particular ways, in an effect that always left a rainbow gleaning off of its blades. Reach was a problem, but Magenta's pre-battle buff spells easily took care of that. Whatever force was binding them together was no match for it. It took concentration to use it in its decaform power, but Magenta had had decades of experience at maintaining focus.

General Yellow wasn't taking any risks or showing off. She stuck simply to firing bolts at the rocks. When she was lucky, it struck between the rocks and split the segments off. When she was unlucky, it hit the rocks, bounced off, but conveyed its burdening and captivating powers, making the Rock Boy stand still.

"Get clear!" Almakanti shouted. The Sessile Spear only worked if you stayed in one place and didn't move, which suited his defensive style of fighting just fine. He had aim at one of the more complete Rock Boys, which was being held in place by the power of General Yellow's Burdening Bolts. The spear shone brightly and fired a forcefull bolt off with the feel of a cannon firing.

The Rock Boy exploded into pebbles.

Cheers echoed all around. "That'll learn em!", one excited soldier shouted.

"Now, you see this?" another soldier said to his friend conversationally, "The old king would never have actually fought on the ground with us oiks. Never would have told us to fall back and try to protect us, either. I dunno why he ain't taken his title yet, though."

"I heard about that. He wants to fulfil the old king's last request before he does. I dunno why. It's not like he owes the bastard anything, may he rest in peace."

BANG! Another Rock Boy exploded into so much pebbles. A few were starting to finally collapse from all the vital point cherry tapping, too. It was a very hard fought battle, but it wasn't very long. By the time the hour had ended, it was all over.

"Three cheers for Lord Almakanti and his Generals!" one Lieutenant shouted. As the four worked their way back to their forces, they were showered by the celebratory shouts.

"BANZAI! BANZAI! BANZAI!"

Almakanti waved. He gave the order to an officer. "Okay, let everyone get some food for an hour. Everyone's to have one portion of celebratory drink, too. Then I want everyone back to work on that road. We're having visitors tomorrow, so I'd like to have as much to show them as I can."

With this, he retreated to his tent.

It was later. The early morning found Thax and his companions walking back up the road to their conveyor. Thax had taken Boohs and Hexby to the hot springs, and Cut got some time to herself to prepare.

They were off the ground once again, and once again Hexby brought them into the shared dream that was the comfortable traincar.

The four sat around the table. It was a nice, solid table, one around which plans could be drawn up, and that's what Cut wanted to discuss. "Do you actually have a plan for when we meet up with Almakanti?" She said.

"Well, not really," Thax sheepishly admitted. "I was kind of picturing swooping in and being all 'give up your evil ways Almakanti' and he'd be all 'no now you die' and we'd have a sweet kickass battle where I defeat him and stuff."

Cut facepalmed. "You truly are a literary hero, Thax." She turned to Boohs. "You've had a lot of practice, and I assume schooling on tactics. What do you think?"

Boohs looked at the map Cut had drawn. She had a pretty deft hand at it; if she ever got tired of her role as a rogue, she'd certainly make a good living at portraits and landscapes and the like, he thought.

"It seems we'd have him in a natural wedge here, between the mountains and the pass's blockage.  The army there, what there is, would be too easily hemmed in to really maneuver, so it'd be our best chance of making it a good four vs four match"

"Four vs four?" Thax asked, confused.

"Yes, Thax, four vs four, weren't you paying attention wheen Hexby was giving us the intelligence he'd gotten off scrying?" Thax said irritatedly. "Go on, Hexby, tell him again."

"Indubitably." Hexby cleared his throat. He was a little irritated himself at having to say all of this again. The one thing he couldn't stand was having to repeat himself. He knew he could be long winded, so this irritated him as much as anybody having to listen.

"Almakanti is camped along the mountain road he has been building as he and his men clear the mountains. The camp is somewhat elongated now. My scryings have shown them making far faster progress than we had anticipated. What we had thought was a two month job has been reduced to a month's work. His planning here has proved to be very efficient. If we wish to stop him, we shall have to be swift. Also, it is fortunate that there are four of us, for Almakanti has three generals, and all four of them are armed with legendary weapons."

"Oh, I see." Thax said.

"Tell him the worst part," Cut said.

"Almakanti of a surety knows that we are coming," Hexby said. "He has a witch working for him as a seer, a Slandra Crowefs. As I understand it, she was a prodigy of witchery when she was in University, and would have been a teacher, had she not decided to leave for her own reasons. It was in her honor and for her example that all our signs in our school have braille, and we have endeavored to make braille texts of every book in our collection. It has been slow, as it takes much effort to do, but we feel it is very worth doing."

"Why hadn't you done it before her time?" Thax asked.

Hexby had the decency to look embarassed. "I genuinely do not think the thought had occurred to the seniors of the University before then. I am afraid once one reaches the upper echelons of any society, they lose touch, much as a balloon that is not tied down floats directly to the top of the sky."

"Wait, so Almakanti knows we're coming?" Cut asked with surprise and alarm.

"Yes. Did I not say so last time?"

"I don't remember you saying so. Hoo, we really are idiots, aren't we?" Cut moaned to herself.

"We won't lose, though," Thax said, with some confidence. "We have the Sword Axe, and nothing evil can possibly stand against it, right?"

"You'd better hope that's right," Boohs said, looking at the battle plan once again, very thoughtfully. "Because if it isn't, that's some thousands of soldiers *and* the generals and Almakanti against the four of us. I don't fancy those odds one bit."

"We'll just wing it when we get there," Thax said. "I'm sure there'll be something that'll present itself once we're on the ground. I wonder how much longer it is til we get there, anyway?"

"We're there!" Came the shout from outside. "I can see the camp from here! There must be thousands down there. Look at them haul those rocks! That's a pretty nice road though."

Hexby stood up. "That appears to be our cue. I hope you have some bright ideas, Thax, because we appear to have them in high demand for the moment."

On the ground, Almakanti exited his tent and watched the incoming flyersaur wing itself in from the horizon.

"There it is, my lord!" a sergeant said. "Give the word, and I'll have my guys pincushion the big lizard with arrows."

"We will do no such thing. Summon my generals and prepare for me a flag of truce. There is no honor in crushing an insect, but much in letting it leave first."

The sergeant saluted smartly. "Sir!"

General Cyan, who was already talking to him about logistics on the road work, put a hand on Almakanti's shoulder. "Are you sure you want to do this? You said the Sword Axe might-"

"Its bearer will be a person. If he's wise, then I can try to reason with him. If he's foolish, we can cut him down in any case."

"Your reluctance to waste resources does you credit, my lord."

"And my reluctance to shed blood? Killing people is such a waste. It's better to get what you want in a way that works out for everybody. It's far less work."

Far above, Aeromnibus flew on, bearing the heroes in the cage.  Thax was keeping his eyes shut as they made their final descent.

Hexby spoke up. "There they are. There are four of them. That one, that is Almakanti. He appears to be holding a flag of truce and waving us down with it."

"Ah, he'll want to talk first," Thax said, some relief in his voice. "That will make things much easier."

"Why do you say that?" Cut asked. "It could easily be a trap."

"If he wanted us dead,' Boohs piped up, "I see a whole lot of archers down there, and one of the generals has a crossbow. They could have just fired at us. I don't think this cage would stop arrows."

"And I have alas already expended my last memorizing of the spell that protects Aeromnibus from the bite of arrows. You would be quite on your own." Hexby finished.

"I suppose we could hear him out," Cut said at last. "And if not, we have the Sword Axe, right? I'm not sure how that would save us in any case."

They landed. Almakanti and his generals waited patiently as the heroes disembarked. Thax looked at him, the tallest one. As he did, he realized that Almakanti was the tallest due to what looked like platform shoes on his armor. How fascinating.

"You are Thax Homebred, I take it? Cut Lovingood, Hexby Spayth, Popular Boohs. Welcome. I am Almakanti, Lord of the Federated States." He gave a low welcoming bow.

"Um, hi," was the response from Thax. He shook his head. "No, wait a minute, this is all wrong! I've come to stop you and your forces from invading your way down to my village!"

"Oh, is that all that brought you here? Very well, I am sure we can come to terms."

There was silence from the heroes as this response sunk in.

"What," Thax said, in a flat tone that belied his utter bewilderment.

"I don't conquer every town I see. Do you take me for a folk tale villain of some kind, going around, slaughtering herds and village maids just because I can? I make sure my soldiers keep their hands to themselves, and I reimburse anybody whose feed we use. I refuse to even house them without assent. I think you've had the wrong idea of me."

"But you're an invader," Thax said, defeatedly.

"No," Almakanti said, "I am a liberator. Before I came, here north of the Mountains of Petteritan, there were many small feudal lords, all warring with each other and making their own people hurt each other for their amusement. I put a stop to that. The lands I have freed are now peaceful and law abiding. For the first time in history, the law applies to everyone, and nobody has to worry about saying the wrong thing when the squire's in town."

"But you're all in black armor!" Thax shouted, waving his hands outward. "Black armor that covers your faces!"

"I do so because I made a promise. The others here all do so by choice. I have no decree that everyone need hide their faces." He turned. "Generals, if you'd like, would you put our guests at ease by removing your helmets?"

The three took off their helmets. General Cyan turned out to be a distinguished tiger gentleman, General Magenta a stern but graceful deer, and General Yellow...

"Caae Brae? Is that really you?" Cut asked in disbelief.

It was indeed a cat, blue fur and purple tresses of hair visible now. "It is, Cut. Look how I've come up in the world, huh?"

"But why would you want to work for him? Really!"

"Listen, I saw firsthand that all the rumors we've been hearing? They ain't the truth. They ain't the whole truth. You know me, Cutty, would I be working for this guy if he were every bit the scumbag we've heard?"

Cut sank to her knees. "No, you wouldn't..."

Thax was lost in thought at all these developments. He'd come this far, but he was at a total loss for what to do now. It's like he was an actor who'd been preparing for a part in one play and suddenly found out he'd been shoved onto the stage of a totally different play.

A thought occurred to him.

"You say you aren't going to invade my town," Thax said. "But you still intend to invade the lands past the mountains, don't you?"

"Peacefully so, I hope," Almakanti said. "I don't really want to, but I have a promise to keep. If there were some way out of it, I would take it. I am truly sorry."

He's really honor bound, this guy, thought Thax. Maybe this is the lever I need.

He took the Sword Axe in his hand, and made it produce the sword blade, which he pointed levelly at Almakanti. "Fine! Almakanti, I challenge you to an honorable duel! If I win, you are to stop your conquest, save for finishing clearing the mountain pass, because you're seriously doing some good work there. If you win... name your price."

Almakanti was glad he had a helmet hiding his face. If they saw that he was smiling... finally there was a way out. "If I win, I shall take ownership of the Sword Axe, and you will all have to return home." He pulled out the Sessile Spear and pointed it at Thax. "And since this is a duel, nobody on either of our sides will interfere, understand? If one side should interfere, it is an automatic win for the other. And this is *not* a duel to the death. The first to give up or to be touched by the other's weapon is the loser. Do you agree to these terms, Thax?"

The team looked at him. Thax had determination in his eyes. "Those are acceptable terms. I agree."

"Oh, and one more thing. I know the Sword Axe is capable of firing a beam. My Sessile Spear is also capable of this. Shall we agree not to resort to zapping eachother? Shall we make using our zapping powers an instant loss condition?"

"Fine. Now get ready, Almakanti. Fate itself has brought me many miles from home for this moment!"

"And yet, fate is callous. Fate cares not about the people it uses for its own ends. Never have fate for a master." He assumed a stance with his spear, facing Thax. "As challenger, I offer you the honor of the commencing blow."

Everyone else backed off, making a circle around the two duelists. Thax suddenly was worried. He had never been in such a real fight before. Everything up to now had been pretty one sided. Now he couldn't use the powers of the Sword Axe to just make this not a problem. His friends couldn't pull him out of this.

He felt more alone than he'd ever felt in his life.

He looked at Almakanti, all in that black and white armor, crown molded into his helmet. He wondered why a lord wore such kingly armor. There must be some reason.

"Why do you tarry, Thax? I have offered you the honor of starting the duel. Do you wish to accept? Or do you decline?" Almakanti said.

The wheels in Thax's head started turning. Why would Almakanti want him to strike first? Wait a minute, he has the Sessile Spear. Sessile... hadn't he seen that word before? What did it mean? It had something to do with coral reefs, barnacles... Wait! Of course!

Thax gave a grin. "I decline. You are far more experienced in the manners than I am. IN honor of that experience, I grant you the first move."

Gotcha, Thax thought.

Almakanti gave an approving chuckle. "Good, I was worried this would be boring!" Almakanti brought the spear to bear and charged at Thax, not unlike an enraged male grazersaur.

Thax quickly dodged to one side and made a desparate swing with the Sword of the Sword Axe, only for his sweep to be deflected by the spear's shaft. Almakanti had stopped that quickly from a charge? That took some real control and finesse.

The battle raged on. Thax parried each thrust of the spear quickly with the blade of the Sword of the Sword Axe, while Almakanti skillfully either deflected or dodged every cut and thrust Thax sent his way. Neither would cede ground here.

"I thought you didn't want to invade in the first place," Thax said panting as they broke off their attacks, "Why don't you just throw this match?"

"Would that I could, but honor demands I meet this duel with all the cunning and skill I can bring to bear. I am sorry, Thax, but you must earn the happy ending you're moving towards."

"Fine. Let's try another approach then." Thax shifted the handle and brought out the Axe of the Sword Axe. He brought the head forward and brought up the protective shield, and ran right for Almakanti. The dark lord thrust at it, and found no purchase.

"Very clever," he called out, "but while I can't win, neither can you if all you do is defend!"

"Yeah? Are you going to stop me?"

"I have no need." Almakanti jumped back and resumed his defensive stance. "I can afford to sit here all day. You  are the one that needs to force the issue."

Thax snorted, threw down the shield, and raised the Axe of the Sword Axe for a chop, prompting Almakanti to suddenly thrust forward with the spear. It was only Thax lettin the weight of the Axe pull him back that avoided a hit, and shifting, he tried to chop at Almakanti, who swung under it and hit Thax in the back with a gauntleted hand while his boot tripped him up.

"Thax!" Cut cried, watching the spectacle.

"That was dirty," Thax said as Almakanti let him get back on his feet.

"I only said that one's *weapon* touching the other would win the duel. Nothing was said about anything else."

"Fine, but that means I can do that too!" Thax said, splitting the handle, bringing out both the sword and axe of the Sword Axe, and braced himself for another round. He wondered just how Almakanti was still moving so well inside that suit of heavy armor. He decided to try something.

He rushed again, his axe shield beating aside the spear, but Almakanti's elbow prevented the sword from hitting home, which was swiftly followed by Thax kicking at his midsection to disengage himself.
The duel continued in a whirlwind of blades, boxing, and wrestling, as neither would give any ground, and both stuck and moved, like two dancers choreographed to put on this performance, but with a bonus in it for whoever does best.

The soldiers all around watched in awe as their leader took on this upstart from some village somewhere. Fancy weapon he may have, but that's all that's letting him hold his own against the boss, they reckoned.

Cut finally couldn't take it any more. She threw one of her Serrulate Scissors at the dueling duo, hoping to score a hit on Almakanti, but it was struck out of the air by one of Caae Brae's Burdensome Bolts fired from her crossbow.

"Sorry, Cutty, can't let you do that! Do you want your Thax to lose? You'd just be helping him lose that much faster!"

"He may lose anyway," Hex said cooly. "Look, Thax is already starting to tire. Almakanti has barely been expending any energy this whole duel. He has made Thax do all the work of this duel. It is nearly ingenious."

"Whoever this Almakanti guy is," Boohs mused, "he sure knows his tactics. Then again, I don't think he'd have gotten as far as he has if he didn't."

"Can't we do anything to help!?" Cut said at last, crying out at the unfairness of everything hinging on this duel.

"No," Hexby said. "We can only trust in Thax Homebred and the Sword Axe."

The two duelists broke one more time. Sweat was all over Thax's body, he panted heavily, he felt the tightness crushing his chest. And across from him, Almakanti stood, seemingly as alert and steadfast as he was. It was like fighting a wall.

Thax knew he didn't have any more fight in him. He was at the end of his rope. There was no way he could beat this fount of energy.

"Do you give up?" Almakanti asked him, outstretching a hand towards Thax.

Thax suddenly had a burst of inspiration. He put the Sword Axe handle back together. "Catch!" he shouted as he flung it right at Almakanti.

Everyone watching the duel was amazed and astounded when Almakanti, without thinking, purely on instinct, caught the Sword Axe out of the air. He held it, staring at it. Seconds became minutes as, like a statue, Almakanti was frozen, looking at the Sword Axe in his hand.

"Is he... is he not getting hurt at all?" Cut asked, bewildered.

Boohs shook his head. "The legends said that evil couldn't even stand the touch of the Sword Axe, right?"

Thax, too, stared in disbelief. He shouted. "Almakanti. Almakanti! Hey, are you going to stare at that all day?"

Suddenly Almakanti shook himself awake. "I have seen. Now I understand. Very clever, Thax. I don't think you got what you intended, but it worked. I have been touched by your weapon." He tossed the Sword Axe back. "By the terms we have agreed on for this duel, Thax Homebred, you have won our duel. I therefore swear on my honor to end my campaign."

"YOU BASTARD!" came an ethereal shout that bounced off the mountainsides. Everyone looked where it was coming from, until they saw, in front of Almakanti, in ghostly tones and red lights...

"Cor, isn't that the old king?" one soldier said to another.

"That is! The spitting image! I don't remember him showing that much bone back when he was alive, though."

"I KNEW! I KNEW YOU WOULD SHIRK THE DUTY I IMPRESSED UPON YOU. YOU ALWAYS WERE YOUR MOTHER'S SON."

"Father..." Almakanti said in weak tones that hadn't been heard before.

"YOU HAVE BROKEN YOUR PROMISE TO ME! EVEN NOW IN THE HOMELAND I AM WAKING UP, AND MY WARRIORS WITH ME, TO DO THE DUTY YOU HAVE SHIRKED. I HEREBY WITHDRAW MY PROTECTION FROM YOU. I HAVE NO SON!"

"Wait no PLEASE!"

And suddenly Almakanti's armor burst off him and disintegrated into the winds. Everyone looked in shock at Almakanti's true form, now that he was shorn of his armor and fully naked.

He was a dog. A dog with a very similar build to Thax. There were more than hints of husky in his pedigree. But that's not what had everyone staring.

His fur was bright pink. His hair was bright green. He was a very brightly colored doggo, not fitting to the image everybody had had at all.

"Go on," his voice said, now shorn of the reverb and deepening that had come with the armor. "Go on and look at me. This is who's been leading you. This is who's been the one trying to unite a continent, uphold honor, all of that." Tears formed in his eyes, tears of shame. "Look at me!"

They did. All eyes were on him.

He sat, hands hiding his face, until a shadow formed over him.

It was Thax, holding a hand down. The doggo that had been Almakanti took his hand, and Thax pulled him up to his feet, and then, to his and everyone else's surprise, into a hug.

"You look like you really need this, Almakanti." Thax whispered into his ear.

"Almakanti is a title. My name is Novem."

"Novem." They hugged for a long while. After a while, he looked around at all his soldiers surrounding him.

"Well? What are you all standing around for!?"

"Sir?"

"That mountain pass isn't going to clear itself, nor is that road going to build itself! Get back to it, men!"

"Yes sir!"

"Generals, Thax, and all of you, Thax's friends. Would you all meet me in my tent? It looks like we have a lot to discuss."

In a daze like a dream, they all nodded. They were so lost in the events now that they could only let themselves be washed along by the absurd.

"Thax?" Novem held him back. "Thank you, Thax. You freed me."

"I've kind of lost the thread here, but you're welcome, I guess?"

"I wish to repay you. There's a nice warm mountain pool over this way. Would you join me for a dip?"

Well, he was quite the cute doggo. How could he say no?

"Sure, Novem. Let's go."

The mountain pool was indeed nice and warm. The two sank in and soaked, relaxing in the fine water that seemed to ease everything in their bodies.

"So", Thax asked, "when you took hold of my Sword Axe, did you happen to see-"

"A naked white lioness? Yes. She was very surprised to see me. She swore up and down that I was evil."

"I imagine you two had a lot to talk about."

"We did. She was... nice, in a kind of cold way."

Novem scooted next to Thax, who accepted him being close by.

"You know, this makes us a kind of brothers, since we've both had dealings with her."

"Yeah, Novem, you could say that."

"Would you do something for me, Thax? Or rather, for the both of us?"

"What's that, Novem?"

Novem moved to straddle Thax. "I had to hide my face and body all those years. I wasn't allowed to be out of that armor, and it made me miss so much. Could you find some pleasure with me? I have such need."

Thax felt Novem's dog erection pressing against his growing one. Who would have thought that this figure in the armor would have been this cute and this willing once out of it?

"Of course," Thax got out, right before Novem kissed him, deeply. He felt the doggo's hand go between them and start rubbing thier cocks together. Thax couldn't help but thrust a little, as did Novem.

Once Novem pulled off, Thax gazed into his eyes, since he didn't have much chance to before. They were a very light blue, almost white. Like ice, but with none of the coldness.

"It's a shame you were hidden away for so long, Novem. You're beautiful."

"Some didn't see me that way. But now, I'm glad you are."

"More will, too. More than you would ever have thought, believe me."

Suddenly, Thax felt Novem straddle his erection. "Would you put it in me, Thax? I want to feel you to my very core..."

Thax laid back, and held Novem's hands as the doggo lowered himself onto the equine cock, slipping it all inside. He put a hand on his fit belly, feeling Thax's hardness just on the other side of that bump.

"Ooohhh... mh... how I'd missed this," Novem said.

"Yeah?"

"You remind me of someone I used to know." Novem continued, as he made ready to bounce on him. "He was hung just as much~"

Novem started riding him. Thax was blown away. Obviously this guy had some experience! He felt his cock being worked like it was in a well oiled machine. Plus, the hair bouncing, the cute faces and sounds he made, the way his tail was wagging...

Thax was loving every moment of it.

"oooohh.... you're about to cum, aren't you?" Novem asked.

"How do you know?"

"I can feel it. Do it! I can take it. Fill me, Thax!"

Thax felt his orgasm hit, and filled Novem, his seed rushing in and leaking out. Novem, too, was orgasming, his cock, nothing touching it, shooting out ropes of thick doggy cum all over Thax's chest.

They both panted for a few moments, until Novem carefully dismounted, a few cups of horse cum dropping out when he did. He gave Thax one more kiss before sinking himself into the hot water again.

"I think we'd better get back, once we're clean," Thax said. "Everyone will be waiting at your tent."

"They will. But a few more minutes won't make much difference."

Stories can end anywhere. Some end on boats headed for a golden land. Some end with a great ticker tape parade.

This one ends with a horse and a husky, both covered in cum, holding hands in a hot spring in the light of the setting sun.