Ant and Four 13 - On the Edge
by Winter

"Ant, I've got goosebumps."

"You mean, like, nervous?"

"No, real goosebumps. Like tinglings."

"On your skin?" Ant rubbed one hand down the artificial skin on Four's arm. "Feels smooth."

"Not on my body, on my hull. All the energy, I can feel it."

"Will you be okay? I mean, we're pretty far in."

"My diagnostic check says I'm fine. My circuits are pretty well insulated." Four took his eyes off the viewscreen and glanced at Ant. "I don't think we should get any closer, though."

"Don't worry. Land's End is as close as we can go. Legally, at least."

"You're not thinking..."

"Of course not." Ant gave his friend a one-armed hug, and Four's frown changed into a smile. "Though it'd be fun to see it up close."

"You can't see it, it's a black hole. And space is black. So it would literally be nothing."

"We could still see the, you know, ring. The debris or whatever you call it, waiting to get sucked in."

"Fall in."

"Same thing, isn't it?"

"Not really. It's a gravity well. Like you'd fall off a ladder on a planet, not like... Didn't you read the brochure?"

"I did. Just being funny."

"You... Ooh!" Four let out as much of a growl as his boyish voice could manage. "You're being such an Ant."

"'Cause I am one." Ant's bushy wolf tail wagged. "Admit it, you love my jokes."

"Nope."

"Come on..."

"Nuh."

"Not even the one about..."

"Especially not that one!"

"Are we nearly there yet?"

"Just a little while. I got an automated call from the traffic control centre sixteen seconds ago. We can check in at a place called Cliff Edge." The screen shifted to a picture of what almost looked like an old western movie town, though Ant could see several modern cars. "Looks a bit touristy."

"Well, we are tourists."

"Here's one thing for you Ant, if you wanna see the black hole. They've got a telescope, where we can get a pretty good view."

"Great!"

"And they've got horse riding, can we try that? Please?"

"I dunno. You go if you want. I'm not so keen on big creatures."

"It'll be fine."

"What if they growl at me, like those pet dogs on Sancha?"

"Horses don't growl." Four patted Ant's arm. "Try at least?"

"Hmm."

"I knew you would. You're such a darling."

* * * * * *

Cliff Edge, it turned out, tried its best to live up to the western frontier town mythos. It consisted of low buildings, none taller that three storeys, all built and painted to look as if they were made of wood. The effect was quite realistic, at least to Ant's untrained eye. He strolled along, peering into shop windows, smiling at the saloon-like swinging doors. About halfway down the main street he spotted a book store, though its sign read 'Bookes'. Without really thinking, he pushed on the doors and slipped inside.

The first thing he noticed was how low the bookshelves were, which gave the illusion that the room was much larger than it actually was. One quarter of the space looked more like a sitting room than anything else. There were soft chairs, low tables with reading lamps on them, and those fluffy-looking sit-things that were called bean bags. Ant's tail gave a couple of wags; he'd wanted to try one of those ever since he saw one in a telenet show. Three people were seated, and they all looked up from the books they were reading when the door swung shut. Ant almost rolled his eyes at the now so familiar double takes.

To give them time to get used to his appearance, he steered clear of the sitting area and took a stroll along the shelves. There was a larger variety of books than he had ever seen before. Paperbacks on one shelf, huge tomes on another. Novels, picture books, children's books, comics; some were plastic-wrapped and some had clearly been read before and were at sale for a lower price. Every now and then there were books who bore the legend 'Not For Sale - Reading Copy'. These puzzled Ant for a second or two, until he caught a glance of a young woman in one of the comfy chairs, turning a page. It was like a library, he deduced. People could borrow one of those reading copies, sit down and just, well, read. He liked the idea, and decided to try. If he were wrong, the worst thing they could do was throw him out. During his travels, he had been thrown out from time to time, when he misunderstood rules, or when he simply looked too weird for the locals to bear. It wasn't a big deal, not really.

He picked out a comic book that looked action-oriented, and slowly made his way over to the sitting room, or rather reading room. Since he still caught wary glances from the readers, he chose a seat close to the door. The chairs looked soft, but like so many human-made pieces of sitwear, their backrests lacked adequate tail space. So Ant gently eased himself into a bean bag, resisting a sudden urge to dive in head first. Despite his care, he immediately fell out of it and landed in an indignant heap on the polished hardwood-styled floor.

An elderly lady came out from a back room and hurried to his side. She did the slightest of double takes, but didn't hesitate to take his hand and help him up.

"First time in one of these?" Ant nodded and grinned. "You'll soon get the hang of it. New in town?"

"You can tell?" She laughed, and Ant thought he could hear soft chuckles from a couple of the others. "I've never seen a place like this."

"They used to be more common, or so I've read. Bookstores and cafés, all in one. When I bought this place, I decided that's what I wanted it to be." She nodded to the nearest reader who, Ant saw now, had a mug standing on the table next to her. "Can I get you anything? Coffee? Tea?"

"No thanks." Ant wasn't a fan of hot beverages, especially of the strong-smelling variety. But then he thought of something, and his ears perked up. "Or maybe... do you have grape juice?"

* * * * * *

Ant had just started turning the pages of his comic book, enjoying the colourful drawings while his mind drifted into the plot and he got to know the characters, when there was a light cough just beside him. He glanced up to see Four, his head tilted and a smile on his lips. Immediately, Ant's ears drooped, and his tail gave an insecure wag.

"Sorry..."

"I was halfway down the street before I realised I was talking to myself." Four tried to look stern, but failed as Ant could see his eyes twinkle. "Again."

"Sorry," Ant repeated, and his tail wagged some more. "I don't mean to disappear, I just..."

"...follow your nose."

"It's a bookstore." Ant held up his comic and a mug. "And they've got juice."

"What are you reading?"

Four plopped down on the bean bag, and Ant almost fell off again before he managed to steady himself. The two of them leaned in, heads close together, as they perused the Masked Hero's struggle against heinous villains. Every now and again, one of them would take a sip of grape juice. When they reached the cliffhanger, Ant hopped up and trotted back to the shelf. No more issues were available as reading copies, so he picked up a couple of collected volumes. Meanwhile, Four looked through nature books until he found one about the diverging evolution of birds transplanted to different planets. Grinning to one another, they both held up their money cards and trooped to the checkout.

* * * * * *

"I really do think it wants to eat me." Ant stood back, making a sour face as he wiped slobber out of his arm fur. "Or, I don't know, graze me."

"He's just curious," Four said as he petted the horse's wide muzzle. "He's probably never seen a fuzzbutt like you before."

"Hmpf!" Ant snorted. "When I'm curious I don't drool on people."

"It's just his way of saying hello."

"I need a raincoat."

"Don't be a sour Ant. You said you wanted to ride."

"I didn't, and even if I had I would've changed my mind by now. You never told me they'd be this big."

"Yes I did."

"Not in a way that truly conveyed their size, in comparison to a very small wolf."

"You're taller than me, and I'm not scared."

"You're not edible." Ant crossed his arms, which turned out to be a mistake since now his shirt got slobbery as well. He huffed, and frowned. "And for the record, I'm not scared. Just sensibly wary."

Out of the corner of his eye, Ant could see that the stable boy who should have been helping them out, was still doubled over laughing. He tried on a growl, but that made the horse's ears perk up, and it took a couple of steps towards him, its huge nostrils sniffing the air. Suppressing a gasp, Ant retreated behind a wheelbarrow, but when he saw what it was filled with, he fled out of the coop. Or pen. Or whatever the fenced-in horse area was called. He could hear Four tut at him, but chose to ignore it.

"I could bring out one of our Gotland ponies," the stable boy said, trying to keep a straight face. "But you might end up dragging your feet on the ground."

"Thanks, but no thanks. I'm happy to watch from a distance."

Ant held his breath when the stable boy helped Four up in the saddle, but nothing bad happened. The horse accepted its new rider, and soon Ant couldn't help but smile as a beaming Four was led around an oval track. After a little while the stable boy let go of the safety reins, and instead instructed Four on how to make the horse slow down, speed up, and turn. All in all, Ant found it a fascinating display, how someone so small could control something so large. He did gasp when Four made a smacking sound, and the horse shifted to a fast trot. Ant's body tensed up, and he was ready to leap the fence to catch his friend as he fell.

Which he didn't.

* * * * * *

Once his half-hour was up, Four rode over to the stable boy and, apparently, applied some kind of brakes, because the horse came to a complete stop. The boy took the reins, while Four hopped down, spinning around in a happy dance. Making a soft, cooing sound, the horse nuzzled him gently, and Ant carefully inched closer. As soon as he moved, the thing let out a loud shrieking noise, its lips wobbling and spit flying everywhere, making Ant hastily retrace his steps.

While Four said his final goodbyes to his latest friends, another stable boy came up to Ant with a datapad. They watched a video of Four's ride, while Ant downloaded it onto his own pad. He sent a copy to the Fourtitude, knowing that Four would have it edited and ready for the viewscreen by the time they got back.

He still found it a bit tricky, to wrap his head around the fact that the robot boy and the ferry computer had somehow become their own personalities. Four had become so adept at using his body and controlling the ship at the same time, without missing a beat, and now it seemed that one could pretty much function without the other. While Ant, apparently, couldn't even walk down the street without somehow finding himself inside a bookstore. Let alone drive a horse. He could steer the ferry, though, at least while in space. Take-offs and landings, he left to Four's expertise. Whichever Four.

A small hand slipped into his, bringing him out of his musings. Four's smile was radiant, and while they walked the couple of kilometres back to town, the ferry boy couldn't stop talking about what he had just experienced. And Ant wouldn't want him to. Seeing Four so joyously happy made him all warm inside, and he felt as if he could listen to his chatter forever.

"Do you think I'm the first ferry to ever ride a horse? 'Cause I think I might be. Like, the first ever in the whole galaxy. Isn't that cool, Ant? I think it is. I wonder if the horse will remember me."

Not for the first time, Ant thanked whatever lucky star that had gifted him with such a wondrous friend.

* * * * * *

That night, after watching the horse-riding video for the third time, Ant sat cross-legged on the floor in the workshop. His tongue was in his cheek, as he scraped his next creation with the finest of his blades. Wood carving was his current craze, and he was slowly getting better at it. His first attempts had ended up little more than amorphous shapes, but these days you could usually see what they were supposed to be. In this case, another wolf. He had set his mind to make a wolf-person good enough to sell. So far, he hadn't, but he was getting closer. This one had a muzzle that was too narrow, and his tail got too short before Ant found the right shape. The hands looked good, though, and the feet as well with only one toe-claw slightly chipped.

A crick in his neck told him that it was time to take a break. He glanced over at Four, who was also sitting on the floor, playing with a couple of toy cars, while humming a melody Ant had never heard before. Usually Four would sing songs from the radio, but sometimes he made up his own tunes instead. This one seemed to go back and forth between sad and happy, but Ant decided that it was mostly happy. Or more accurately, he found that happy ended up winning over sad. Just like Four himself. Yes, he sometimes got sad, but his sunshine smile always broke through.

The cars were nothing special, or so Ant thought. They had no engines, not even clockwork ones, and the only way to make them do anything was to hold onto them and move them by hand. Basically a frame with a tin shell, which Ant beat into shape using a small hammer, and wheels connected to nothing. But, they sold better than the more elaborate ones, and who was he to argue with the market? Even when he thought it was wrong.

Four looked up, and their eyes met. He stopped moving the cars around, but he didn't stop humming. Closing his eyes, Ant found the rhythm of the melody, and the next time it started over, he sang along. He didn't hit all the right notes, but enough so that they could harmonise. His voice was deeper, and it formed a solid ground for Four's boy soprano to soar above. They went through the whole thing three times, then as if on cue, they stopped.

"That was great," Four beamed. "I like when you sing along, your voice is really nice."

"I caw like some kinda bird."

"Not true." Four smiled. "Well, at first maybe. But when the song found you, it was great."

"You sound a lot better."

"I've got a voicebox, so it's not fair to compare. I just choose a tune and sing it. You have to search for the music."

"That's nicely put. Search for the music."

"Thank you." Four put away the cars and crawled over to Ant on all fours. "Cool, you made another foxie!"

"He's supposed to be a wolf."

"He looks more like a fox, with the tail like that and then the nose. Let me get my paints."

"He's not done yet."

"He's mostly done. I can start mixing up the red and orange."

"I wanted to make wolfs."

"Then make them more Ant-like." Four grinned. "Want me to hold up a mirror for you?"

"Watch it," Ant growled. "When did you get so sassy?"

"I'm not sassy." Four stood up, and placed his hands on his hips. "I'm just right."

"He. Is. A wolf."

"If I'm sassy, then you're stubborn."

"Am not!"

"Are too! Stubborn as a..." Four chewed on his lower lip, something he often did when deep in thought. "Stubborn as a very stubborn Ant."

"Well, maybe." Ant poked his friend in the belly, over and over again until the tickling elicited soft peals of pearly giggles. "But you know you love me anyways."

Four fell over, trying in vain to slap Ant's prodding fingers away. It wasn't until the laughter turned to shrieks that he finally eased up. By then, they lay on the floor in a heap. Four breathed a sigh of relief.

"I sure don't love you when you do that." He poked Ant, but nothing happened. Instead he ran his fingers through the fur on Ant's arm. "It's not fair that you're not ticklish. I could pull on your fur, but I won't 'cause I don't want to hurt you."

"You can always slay me with your wit and your sass."

"Yeah!" Four grinned happily. "And by painting all your wolves into foxies."

"Oh, come on!"

"This one can be best friends with the collie pup you made before. You remember? That tously one."

"That, was also a wolf," Ant said grumpily. "And he wasn't tousled, he was handsomely unshorn."

"Same thing."

* * * * * *

The tour through the observatory had a surreal feeling to it. The guide, who was also the owner, was dressed in a traditional cowboy outfit, complete with a wide-brimmed hat and a holster belt. No guns, though, Ant noticed. Suited him just fine. Getting shot once was more than enough.

The observatory contained, aside from the telescope and the array of instruments attached to it, a small museum. Part of it was filled with old time telescopes and looking glasses and other astronomy things, but there were also all kinds of technological knick-knacks from long ago. As the tour began, many of the other tourists were more curious about the wolf boy and his robot friend, but when Ant started running from display to display, eyes wide and tail wagging, their interests shifted as well. Ant found the guide very knowledgeable, as well as patient as he asked question after question about things that caught his eye. Especially at a section of mining equipment, where Ant could have stayed all day if the view of the black hole hadn't beckoned.

As Four had predicted, there really wasn't much to see. The view toward the galaxy core showed more stars and star systems, and the dark void Ant had half expected was nowhere to be found. But, as the guide adjusted the settings, the viewscreen filled with tiny specks of light, almost as if someone had thrown handfuls of pebbles across space. Were they remnants of stars and planets, or just asteroids that had failed to form larger things? Ant made up his mind to ask. Then, even they thinned out, and there was nothing. He felt a little bit disappointed.

"This is what our eyes can see, even at maximum enhancement," the guide said, his voice deliberately low to keep his audience riveted. "Now, how about we widen the spectrum!"

He turned a dial, and smiled as everyone gasped or started whispering amongst themselves. Ant's tail wagged again. On the screen, the centre of the pebble cloud lit up with a brilliant white light, and everything around it reflected that glow. Plumes shot up and down from it, and as the guide kept spinning his dial, fields of shimmering colours danced across the entire screen.

"It's pretty," Four whispered. "Don't you think so, Ant?"

"Yeah. It all came alive."

"These are all representations of wavelengths our eyes can't pick up." The guide used a pointer to indicate the brightest blob of light. "The heart of our galaxy gives off all kinds of radiation, including radio waves and even sound. Do you want to hear it?"

There was a chorus of agreement, and the guide flipped a switch. A low, steady hum filled the room, and Ant had to cup his sensitive wolf ears. Every now and then there were little pops and scratches, almost as if from a vinyl record.

"The frequency has been modulated to fit our hearing range. The sound itself is way, way too low in pitch for our ears."

"I like the Melody Station better," someone said, and Ant could hear Four giggle at the joke. Another voice piped up. "Is that why we can't go any closer?"

"Yes," the guide replied. "Not only is the radiation unhealthful to us, it would destroy our spaceships before we got very far. Land's End is just on the edge of the safe zone. The last human settlement."

"But there are others, right?" a man asked. "I mean, illegal settlers."

"Unofficially, yes." The guide nodded. "People who think they can find no-cost estate, or open up mines and harvest all kinds of raw materials."

The mention of mines made Ant's ears perk up. Having grown up in an illegal mining operation, he knew all about the hardship and the danger. For a second his mind went back there, to the dark caves inside the asteroid where... Ant shook his head, and focused on the guide's voice.

With regular intervals frontierspeople came hobbling into Land's End, sick or dying from overexposure. Even worse, the guide explained with a grim face, was when they brought their children along. Ant's tail drooped, and he felt Four's hand take his, squeezing it gently. He gave his friend a wan smile.

Even though he had never intended to act upon them, the last notions Ant had nurtured of putting his toes over the line, had been quelled.

* * * * * *

That night, Ant sat on the Fourtitude's ramp and watched the multitude of stars that filled the night sky. It wasn't as cluttered as when they had passed through a star cluster, but there was still so much light that to his wolf eyes, it might as well have been daytime. Still, it was a bit cooler, and he enjoyed the peace and quiet.

Ever since the observatory visit, he had been in a sombre mood. Not even looking through a telescope lens at the very centre of the galaxy, seeing what there was to see with his own eyes, had cheered him up for very long. Suddenly, he longed for darkness. Not the complete isolation of the caves, but at least proper nights. Several times during their travels, Ant and Four had been warned about the galaxy's outer edge, that there might be areas of lawlessness, and that bands of pirates roamed some of the systems. Ant knew of the Steelwood gang, of course. Absentmindedly, he touched the scar on his chest, where a Steelwood pirate had once shot him. Not to mention the attack on Lakeview, where he had seen the carnage they wrought up close.

No, he decided, he didn't want to go too far out. He didn't want to learn about other bands of pirates the hard way. Why risk all the good things they had, he and Four? Maybe they could go back to New Mérida. It had been the first world the two of them visited, and Ant had liked the small villages and the friendly people. This time Four could see everything in person, unlike last time when he didn't have his proxy body, and had been confined to the Fourtitude. Ant had all but made up his mind to suggest they do just that, when the patter of bare feet brought him back to the present. Four sat down, and leaned against him with a sigh. Ant wrapped an arm around his shoulder.

They sat there in companionable silence and watched as the lights in Cliff Edge began to go out. They had parked on a little hill just outside the town proper, so they could see most of the main street and all the way over to the horse farm to their left. Ant's thoughts about past and future left him, and he just enjoyed his friend's company. Everything else felt insignificant. Only here and now and them mattered. Time ticked by, although Ant neither knew nor cared. He could have sat like that forever and been happier for it. But, the spell was broken by another forlorn sigh. He turned toward Four so that he could give him a proper hug.

"Thinking about those settlers?" He felt a nod against his shoulder. "The kids."

"Yes. How come you always know what's on my mind?"

"'Cause you're my friend." Ant gave that mop of golden hair a brief kiss. "And, I'm thinking the same thing."

"It's sad."

"It is."

"I wish there was something we could do."

"There isn't. Those settlers made a choice, it's not up to us to tell them they're wrong."

"But the kids didn't choose."

"I know." It was Ant's turn to sigh. "Believe me, I know. But we can't just take them from their parents."

"Still..."

"I know." Ant tightened the hug, and he felt wetness on his shoulder. "Yeah, it is sad."

"I wish we could be like the Morning Calm, when they saved you."

"To be honest, they didn't save me as much as they kidnapped me. I was pretty livid at first, and yelled at them to bring me back home."

"But that turned out for the better in the end, didn't it? You chose to go with them."

"Yes, but what I'm trying to say is, none of the people in there," he released the hug and gestured to the night sky, "would be happy to see us. And definitely not if we try to take their kids."

"But it wouldn't be kidnapping, it would be a rescue mission."

"I doubt they would see it that way. Even the kids."

"But they'll die in there."

"Yeah. Maybe." Ant lay down on his back with a groan. "I know they didn't choose it, but it's still their lives."

"But you could change yours!"

"Raeder agreed to take me back, did I ever tell you that?"

"No." Four turned to face Ant, his eyes wide. "I thought you'd told me everything."

"Well, not all the embarrassing bits." Ant felt his ears flick. "I was a real pest at first. But when they finally changed their mind, so did I."

"Why?"

"Because I began to realise just how big the galaxy is. And that I wanted to see more of it."

"Like we're doing now?"

"Exactly. So Raeder tried to sound really annoyed, but I could tell he kinda liked having me along."

"I can relate to that." Four smiled at Ant, then let out a giggle. "Not so much the annoyed bit, but the kinda like having you along bit."

"Kinda, huh?"

"Well, all right, I really really like having you along." He patted Ant's shoulder. "Very much so."

"But...?"

"But, I still want to go in there, to... I don't know, at least try and let the kids know there's other ways of life." He sighed again. "Not sure how."

"But you heard what the tour guide said. Spaceships break down in there. What if we get stranded? Or worse, the Fourtitude gets destroyed."

"That would be the end of me," Four whispered. "But what if it doesn't happen? Maybe we could at least save a few."

"I wouldn't want to risk it."

"I would," Four said in a low voice. "I think it might be worth the risk."

"Why don't we sleep on it. There's that wild west show in the square tomorrow, we could watch that and then talk some more."

"I don't know. I'm not in the mood for fun. Or sleep. I just wanna do something good."

"We are  doing good things. We make toys, which make people happy."

"It's not enough." Four smacked his fist into his palm. "I... I don't know why this has got me in such a twist, but I can't just stand by and do nothing."

"There's probably thousands of settlements in there, you can't save them all." Ant shook his head. "Even if they want you to, which I'm sure they won't."

"If we save just one, it'll be worth it. Ant, I want to go."

"To your death?"

"I don't think it'd come to that. I was well put together. I'd last long enough."

"Four..." Ant sighed. "The settlers might kill you on sight."

"They might not." Four got to his feet. "We need to go. We have to try!"

"It's your choice." Ant stood up as well. "You are the Fourtitude, I'm just a passenger."

"Ant, what are you doing?"

"I can't go with you this time." Ant stepped off the ramp, landing nimbly on his feet on the ground below. When he spoke again, his voice was ragged. "I can't watch you die, Four. I just can't. If you go, you'll have to go on your own."

"But... but..."

"I'll be here waiting for you when you come back."

"But I don't know how to do things by myself!" Four's voice broke. "I'm just a little robot."

"You know much more than you think you do, Four. Anything you set your mind to, you can do it."

"I want you with me."

"Not this time. I..." Ant sighed, but then he squared his shoulders. "I'm going into town. Please think it over before you risk everything."

Turning around, Ant started walking slowly, his mind in a daze. How could he make Four understand? Change had to come from within, from one's own mind. The words of a stranger would mean very little to these people, and a stranger as strange as him would most likely be met with hostility. Behind him, he heard the ramp being pulled in, then the door closed, but he didn't turn around. Whatever his thoughts may be, it was ultimately Four's decision. Ant didn't even turn around when the hum of the engines started up, nor when a rush of air blew past him to signal the Fourtitude's departure.

Despite what he had said, Ant decided to avoid the town. He had no interest in seeing people, not right now. Instead he strolled down a path towards the edge of a forest. In the distance he could smell water, and he soon came to a creek. The path crossed it on a narrow bridge, and at its centre, he sat down. There was space enough between the handrail posts so that he could dangle his feet above the water.

He sat there for a long time, staring down into the still creek, at his own face reflected in the starlight. For once, his mind seemed completely empty. Then, the water image shattered to hundreds of glittering pieces. Another tear followed the first, rippling the surface further. Ant's breath hitched into a sob.

And he began to cry.