Shade Koopa let out a deep, bored sigh fromwhere he relaxed in the courtyard of the Koopa King’s castle, his shell up against a sturdy rock, idly twiddling his magic staff between two of his clawed fingers. He stared up at the smoky, ash-filled sky, listening to the moat of lava bubbling faintly in the distance, keeping the castle and its walls isolated from any unwanted visitors—not that a pair of pesky plumbers didn’t always findaway inside, anyway. At least the Brothersleft well enough alone so long as the Koopa King wasn’t up to his usual shenanigans with waging war on the Mushroom Kingdom. Shade, along with plenty more of Bowser’s assistants— not minionsor underlings, assistants—were growing rather tired of cleaning up after the head honcho’s messes, especially since it often meant getting stomped on the head or hit with a few fireballs whenever they found themselves in the line of active duty. Sure, the various Kingdoms’ checkpoint systems kept everyone safe and unharmed at the end of the day, but it was still exhausting to have to cover up Bowser’s backside after his half-baked schemes always seemed to go awry.

Today was an uneventful day for Bowser’sKingdom, at least—and Shade had been hatching a schemeto get backatthe fearsome Koopa. Ascheme that, ironically, included covering the overgrown turtle’s backside. Shade had merely been waiting for just the right moment to get on with his plan. It was only a matter of time, and he suspected that it wouldn’t be much longer now...

Sure enough, right on cue, the iron door with a stylized emblem of Bowser’s face suddenly opened up on the other side of the courtyard, and a band of Koopa trumpeters flooded out of the castle. The yellow-shelled Koopa Troopas dressed in blue regalia fell into formation quickly and efficiently, five of each flanking the walkway that led into their master’s castle. Turning to face each other, they tilted their trumpets upward and played a fanfare that announced the king’s appearance— and also demanded that all of his followers present in the castle’s courtyard be summoned immediately to witness his grandeur.

Shade snorted as he rose to his feet, always amused at the splendor that Bowser required in these proceedings. While the younger Koopa respected the fear that the king commanded, he and many of the other Koopalings didn’t share that same fear. Bowser certainly wasn’t all talk, but he lacked an ability that several of his assistants—again, not underlings—possessed. Magic. And that was something that Shade was about to take advantage of.

As the dozens of Goombas, Koopas, Shy Guys, Snifits—most of whom were present served as the elite members of their species that made up Bowser’s army— and more flocked to hear what their king had to say, Shade managed to keep to the

outside of the group, taking cover in the uneven, jutting formations of volcanic rock that lined the towering walls of the courtyard, providing plenty of cover to shield him from view. Bowser never took attendance or anything of the sort when he made his appearance, simply assuming that his subjects would never think to try and skip out on a meeting, so Shade doubted that he’d be missed during this one.

Oh, but Bowser wouldn’t be missed at all. He was going to help make sure of that.

Trying not to snicker, Shade found the hiding spot that he’d scouted outearlier that morning—he settled down in the middle of a rocky formation that resembled a crown with a half dozen jutting points, casting heavy shadows that, along with the rocks themselves, would make Shade nearly impossible to see. It was near the upper corner of the courtyard, which allowed him a perfect view of the assembly and the castle door. The sly Koopaling clutched his wand, trying his best not to snicker or quiver with anticipation as he watched as the trumpeters finished their fanfare. This was going to be so, so good!

A rumbling stomping that caused the very earth to rumble was all that was needed to signal Bowser’s appearance. The towering, menacing King of the Koopas emerged from his castle, the spikes on his green shell looking freshly polished, his claws freshly filed to dagger-like points, and his face creased by a fresh scowl. Despite his fearlessness towards the king, Shade couldn’t help but feel a chill ripple down his spine at Bowser’s arrival. He could certainly control a room, at the very least.

Dealing with plumbers, however, was far from his strongest suit.

“Listen up, underlings!” Bowser growled, his deep voice echoing off of the stone walls of the courtyard. “We’re to begin preparations for an invasion of the Beanbean Kingdom! The Mushroom Kingdom continues to maintain good ties with our shared neighbor, so they’ll not turn a blind eye to such a brazen attack. Gwa ha! We’re going todivide our grand army—half of you will be going withmy right hand Koopa, Kamek, to strike at the heart of the Beanbean Kingdom. I will not be accompanying you on this assault—I will remain behind with the other half of the army to launch an attack on Princess Toadstool’s castle. They’ll be woefully undefended with their forces sent to reinforce Queen Bean, and the Princess will be mine for the taking! Then, she’ll finally be persuaded to relinquish control of her precious Mushroom Kingdom to me! Gwa ha ha har!”

Shade couldn’t help but roll his eyes as a cheer erupted from the watching crowd. Of course, no one would be brave enough to tell Bowser what a terrible plan it was. His entire army hasn’t been able to stop the Mario Brothers in the past, so what good would splitting it in half do? Even if the Brothers did run to Queen Bean’s aid, they’d be back to save the day in the Mushroom Kingdom right afterwards. And if they stayed behind, well...that would cause the king’s plans to flop before they’d really even gotten started.

So, it was up to Shade to prevent such a waste of time and effort from even happening. The Koopaling raised his magic wand, swirling his hand around the purple crystal set into the tip of the short, blue staff, starting to focus on the spell he wanted to cast. It was a complex spell, but he’d already practiced it on a few unwitting ‘volunteers’, so he was confident that he could pull it off now.

Tuning out whatever else Bowser wassayingto orchestrate his‘brilliant’ plan, Shade concentrated hard on what he wanted to have happen to the Koopa King. His wand began glowing with dull purple light, but it wasn’t enough to illuminate his hiding place and give away his position. Flicking hiswand down onceit had charged up enough energy, the projectile that shot forth from its crystal sphere traveled fast enough to make it impossible to tell where it had originated from. Despite its speed, though, Shade’s aim was true—the orb of white magic struck Bowser clean in the side just as he was raising an immense, clawed hand.

“Gwuh!?” the towering turtle rumbledin surprise as he was engulfedby white light with all of his followers staring at him in shock. They wouldn’t have enough time to think to locate the origin of the magical blast, however; as they watched, their king had suddenly become enveloped in an extremely humiliating outfit. Even those most fearful of the Koopa’s presence couldn’t help but snicker and cover their mouths as, seemingly out of nowhere, a frilly pink bonnet had appeared around Bowser’s horned head, coupled by a matching bib situated around his neck. The most humiliating garment, however, was the one that had wrapped itself around the king’s waist and hind end. In front of all his most loyal subjects, the Koopa King was wearing a gargantuan, white, puffy diaper!

Shade barely managed to stifle his snickering, though it likely wouldn’t have been heard over the roar of laughter that erupted from the crowd standing before Bowser. He’d been looking forward to thisvery moment for countlessdays, and he’d been thinking about how the king would look in such an embarrassing getup nearly constantly since he’d hatched his scheme. Seeing him now, though, was better than

anything thatthe Koopaling could’ve possiblyimagined! But,he wasn’t done having fun just yet. He spun his magic wand again, focusing intently on Bowser...

“Gwah! What’s the meaning of this!?” the Koopa king roared over the ruckus in the courtyard as he stared down at the rounded undergarment around his waist, making the thronging laughter falter for the briefest of moments. “I look...I look...adorable!” he growled, his craggy face creasing in a grin that showed off the array of sharp, shiny white teeth in his mouth, which were far less intimidating with everything else that was happening. “Look at me! I’m Bowser, King of the Diapered Koopas!”

Shade’s grin was just as wide as the king’s as he kept his wand pointed at the gargantuan Koopa, waving it back and forth as he controlled the turtle’s words and actions. He played Bowser like a puppet at a theater, making him bend over to show off hispoofy bottomto the ogling, guffawing crowd. He couldn’t believehe’d gotten Kamek to teach him magic that was this strong! Sure, he had to do some of his own research to figure out how to specifically summon this desired outfit, but his efforts were quickly proving to be well worth it. Bowser looked completely ridiculous! This would surely teach the Koopa a lesson...

Exactly what this lesson was, though, Shade wasn’t entirely sure. He just wanted a little bit of revenge for all the nonsense that the king put him and hundreds of others through on a daily basis. This was simply a dose of turnabout being fair play. He was doing the king a favor, truthfully—now, he wouldn’t have to waste resources on something as absurd as invading two neighboring kingdoms at once. If anyone brought up his reckless, foolhardy plan in the future, all that anybody would be able to recall is how their great Koopa King wound up dancing in front of everyone while dressed like a big baby!

“Gwa ha ha har! Behold your king, minions! Your king hatchling! Wha ha har!” Bowser rumbled, looking as though he was having quite the jovial time as he rolled over onto his back, rocking back and forth as though his shell was a bassinet, even going so far as to suck on his thumb as he kicked his legs back and forth, making his immense, rustling diaper plainly obvious for all who could see. Some of the king’s elite guards had poked their heads out from within the confines of the castle to investigate the commotion, and even these Koopas couldn’t hold back a fit of giggles as they watched Bowser giggle like an overgrown infant. These guards, however, soon proved to be the ones to ruin the fun; once they’d regained their composure, six blue-shelled Koopas hurried to their king’s side, being mindful of how they held their spears. One of them whispered into Bowser’s ear, and while

Shade couldn’t tell what he’d said, he could make an educated guess. He made Bowser respond, “Aww, playtime’sover already? Humph!...Fine, daddy, I'llgo back inside...”

Shade beamed as he listened to the renewed surge of laughter from the gathered crowd, though he couldn’t help but feel a little bad for the embarrassed Koopa who’d justearned the title of ‘daddy’from theking. Knowing that hecouldn’t risk keeping this scene continuing without giving himself away, he waved his wand and made Bowser rock back and forth until herose to his feet, ensuring that he made a showof taking wide, exaggerated, waddlingsteps as he headed back into hiscastle, shepherded inside by his guards and trumpeters. Shade snickered as the castle door began to close, having an idea for one final hurrah...

“When does the king baby get to have his diaper changed?”

The Koopaling leaned back in his hiding spot as the door slammed shut, basking in the howls of laughter from the crowd that showed no signs of dying down anytime soon. He set his wand down and relaxed, knowing that he’d have to wait for a little while to emerge from the corner of the courtyard, lest he reveal himself as the culprit. Bowser would be furious in about ten minutes or so, once the magic wore off...and Shade couldn’t help but wonder if that was just enough time to allow the Koopa King to actually put his diaper to use.

End