"I can't believe you actually kissed him!"

Charlie winced at the weavile’s volume. "Not so loud," he urged, glancing around. While the massive beach on the edge of the forest was as vacant and frozen as ever, Nicky's family did live around here. It would be just his luck if one of her brother's eavesdropped from the ocean. Or, worse, Nicky herself. "And I already told you, he kissed me. It just sort of happened."

Lexi crossed her arms. "Uh-huh."

"It's true!" Charlie insisted.

"Now who's the loud one?" 

Charlie glared, feeling the distinctive urge to peck her. And if It probably showed too. 

"Aw, c'mon, Charlie," she said with her characteristic smirk. "Don't get your tail feathers all in a twist. I'm just teasing. Why'd you even tell me if you're going to be so wishy-washy about it?"

"I don't know," he said honestly. "I guess I just knew you'd keep it a secret and I wanted to talk to someone about it. Arceus knows I couldn't talk about this with my dad. But seriously, he did kiss me first."

"First?" She grinned at him. "Does that mean you returned it? Did you kiss each other more than once?"

"N-no, I--" Charlie closed his beak. Why was he denying it? He was here to share, to get advice from something he trusted, someone with experience. Lying wouldn't help either of them here. He had to suck it up and spit it out. "Yes," he admitted. "It was awkward, but I kind of liked it?"

Charlie waited for Lexi to laugh at him. To make fun of him or something. It never came.

"My first kiss was awkward too," the weavile said softly. "You know Billy? The sno--er, frosmoth now. Yeaaah, I had a crush on him a while back. Got together for a bit. Our mouths are NOT compatible, let me say that."

Charlie snorted. "That must've been weird."

"It was actually kind of amazing? Once I got used to it, wow. Seriously. His tongue. Wow. I can't say wow enough! I didn't know tongues could get that deep!" 

As stars settled in Lexi's eyes, Charlie shifted on the fallen log that was his perch. Why does she have to be so her? "Please tell me you're still talking about kissing."

"Oh, right. Got ahead of myself there! I'll tell you all about that actively when you're older." She winked. "Heheh!"

"You're only two years older than me," he grumbled. Which was true. It was actually why he went to her in the first place. She had plenty of experience in these matters. As she oh-so-pointed out by being way too lewd. It also wasn’t like he was unaware of what she was talking about. It was difficult to be friends with Lexi and not know about that stuff. Impossible, really. It was kind of where he got that idea with his beak.

But with a snom? Seriously? And with his tongue? There? I want to be grossed out but I’m also kinda sorta curious.

Lexi waved a dismissive claw. "Anyhow, how much kissing did you guys end up doing? Was it a lot? I bet it was a lot. Was there tongue?" His burning cheeks betrayed him, and Lexi grinned. "Oh-ho! What about Lance? Is he a good kisser? Must've been with how excited you were to tell me all about it~"

"I guess he was good," he said after a moment to settle his temperature. "We kissed, ah, for most of the night? And then fell asleep together. Cuddled, I guess? Made me feel all warm and happy." And aroused. Not that he would share that; he didn't feel comfortable being that open just yet. Maybe after warming up to it. It took longer than a few days to figure out his gender and rediscover his sexuality, as much as Lexi seemed keen to accelerate the process.

Lexi made a cooing noise. “That’s adorable! I’m happy for you guys. First kiss and already sleeping together!”

His eyes widened. “Lexi! It wasn’t like that! We just cuddled!”

“Did he pop a boner?” Lexi continued as if Charlie wasn’t about to implode from embarrassment. “Was it big? I bet it was big. His sheath is pretty sizable for a vulpix, and--”

“What is wrong with you?!” Charlie knew he was blushing up a storm as he tried, and failed, to shove Lance’s penis out of his mind. Because he had seen it. Nothing more than a glimpse, but that was enough to burn the image into his eyes forever. A thin and blue tapered rod, he could tell Lance wasn’t fully erect. He knew what an engorged penis looked like--embarrassing knowledge gleaned from occasional accidental boner his father got--and Lance’s wasn’t that. It was almost cute, something he was positive he’d never admit.

Charlie did the only thing he could: he looked away quickly, and pretended he hadn’t seen it. He could only imagine how embarrassed the poor vulpix was. Lance couldn’t help it. They were kissing, of course he’d be aroused. Arceus, he had been aroused. It was natural to feel warm and fuzzy like he had during the kiss, for his chest to be tight and his stomach bubbly. Even a bit wet, to his own mortification. Lance hadn’t commented on that--he figured, as a vulpix, the smell was obvious--so neither did he comment on Lance’s obvious excitement. It was only fair. 

“You’re not denying it~”

Lexi had him there. “I-- He just-- it’s only natural that kissing made us--” Lexi’s grin only widened. There was only one way out of this: the truth. “Fine, he had a boner. And because I’m a good friend, I didn’t point it out. Happy?”

“You know you can trust me, right?” Lexi said. “You can tell me allll about what’s going on with you, and I’ll keep tight-lipped about it. I really do want to help. And talking with a friend about these things does help.” She leaned in. “All I ask for in return are the juicy details.”

“But those details are embarrassing,” Charlie whined. He hated that he whined. 

“It’s only embarrassing if you let it embarrass you,” Lexi teased.

"M-maybe.” Charlie squirmed on the log. He coughed and then changed the subject. “Does this mean I'm dating Lance? I'm kinda nervous. He's a guy, and I'm… technically not… but I still feel like I am. You know?"

Lexi sat down and crossed her legs. "Honestly? I don't. This must be super weird for you. It's weird for me and it's not even happening to me." Charlie's wings drooped. "Hey, I didn't say you're weird. Just the situation. Gosh, you're one of my best friends. Even if you were weird, I'd totally still hang out with you."

"Thanks," Charlie said, a small smile on his beak. 

Even during the comfortable silence, Charlie couldn't sit still. What Lexi said about the snom wouldn't leave his head. He couldn’t even imagine what kind of tongue could satisfy Lexi that much. Surely it wouldn’t be better than his own beak was? Because his beak was pretty good, if he said so himself.

"Why are you squirming?" Lexi asked. Then she smirked. "Not going to lay another egg, are you?"

Now that broke Charlie out of his thoughts. "H-hey, don't even joke about that! Seriously, ugh."

Lexi rolled her eyes. "Listen, dude, if you want me to act normal around you without walking on eggshells--okay, bad pun. What I mean is, unless you want me to act differently around you, I'm going to make the occasional egg joke. You can also make jokes about my time of the season, fair's fair."

"Lexi-- that's not-- you don’t lay-- it's not the same!"

"So you want me to censor myself, and treat you differently than I used to?"

"N-no! Just treat me the same without mentioning my fucking reproductive system!" He put his wings over his beak. Did I just cuss?

"Dude," Lexi said. "I always used to tease you about lacking a dick." That was true. Lexi was weird. "This is like that. So if I didn't mention your fun bits, that would be treating you differently. I'll be helpful and sensitive when you need it. Like after you laid your egg. But now? When we're both hanging out, talking? I don't think it would be good to just ignore it."

"I'm not ignoring it," Charlie said. "I made out with Lance. That's practically embracing it!"

"Wow, you have a lot to learn about love." Shaking her head, Lexi crossed both her arms. "Listen. Lance liked you before he knew you were a chick." Charlie's left eye twitched at the pun. "So having a pussy… doesn't matter as much to him as you'd think. He talked to me about it, actually. It was cute, if a bit sad. I was certain you didn't share his feelings."

That was news to Charlie. "He did? He told me about his crush, but not that you knew about it. And why'd you think I wouldn't be into him? I like him! He's sweet and fun to be around."

"This was around the time you were fawning over Nicky," explained Lexi. 

That was honestly a good point. About a year ago, Charlie had just begun to notice girls. More specifically, the only one of their friends who also had a cloaca. Even if it was the reptile kind. Not to mention how adorably awkward she was. With little flippers much too big for her body--for now--and her uncertain, shy personality. He really wanted to date her for a time. Still kinda did.

Charlie once again glanced around the desolate ice sheet pretending to be a beach to make sure no lapras were listening in. It would be super awkward if Nicky were to hear about that crush that kinda sorta never went away. "Oh. Right. Um, Nicky doesn't know, does she?"

"Poor thing is even more oblivious than you."

Charlie started nodding. Then the words registered. "Hey!"

The weavile giggled. "You know it's true," she said. "But seriously, I'm not going to stop making egg and girl jokes. My strategy is to get you so used to it that having a pussy stops bothering you. Because, you know, locking yourself in your cave like that really worried me. Worried us."

Charlie was strangely touched. In Lexi's own way, she was trying to make him feel better. Even if he didn't think it would work. But she was trying, and that's what mattered. Maybe.

Thoughts of the snom returned. Maybe Charlie could ask about it? Despite how strange the thought of it was, he was curious. Lexi had basically thrust it in his face anyways. Surely she wanted him to ask about it. "So, did you actually… with Blake?"

"Billy," Lexi corrected, "and yes, he totally ate me out." Charlie squawked at her bluntness. "And then I sucked him off. Have you ever seen a bug’s dick before? They’re pretty gnarly.” He squawked again, suddenly rethinking his curiosity. She raised an eyebrow. "Seriously, dude? Don’t ask if you can’t handle it. Ugh, I don't understand you sometimes. If anything tells me you're the same old Charlie, it’s this."

“Hey! I can handle it!” insisted Charlie. 

“Sure you can.” Her smirk lessened into something more gentle. “By the way, how’re you feeling? Does your dad know? Is your vent doing okay? That was a pretty big egg. As much as I tease you, I do care about you.”

“I’m doing okay,” Charlie whispered, feeling as if he was going to spontaneously combust at any moment. Lexi could be very sweet when she wanted to be. “Um, Dad knows, he took it well. Gave me a bath and helped me relax. Was very nice. Thanks for asking.”

“Aw, that’s sweet. I’m glad you’re not feeling awkward around him or anything.” She beamed suddenly, and Charlie knew he wasn’t going to like what she said. "I just realized something. We're having girl talk! Isn't that cool?"

Charlie's feathers fluffed up with indignation. "No we're not!" he protested. 

"Dude. So far this conversation has been girl talk to a tee. Discussing our crushes, sharing stories of our first kisses, talking about our bodies, and me teasing you! That last one is something I always do, but you get the point."

Charlie opened and closed his beak for several seconds. "Arceus, you're right. This is so weird. I’m so not ready for this."

Lexi placed a claw on his wing. "If it helps," she began softly, "It's been a lot of fun talking frank with you. Er, franker than usual. I usually talk with Nicky, but she is terrible at girl talk. Just blushes and nods about whatever. Always agreeable. I love her, I really do, but she's kind of bad at this."

"Am not!" A heartbeat passed. "Oops."

Both Charlie and Lexi froze. For Charlie, it felt like his heart was trying to escape his chest. How much did she hear? Where is she? Why didn't we notice her? Oh, no, please tell me she didn’t hear about my crush on her!

Seemingly able to shrug off her shock, Lexi stood up, sighed, and walked up to a dip in the ice. Charlie squinted. He didn't see anything. 

Lexi stopped at the hole. "Hey, Nicky. Wanna join our girl talk?"

Anxiety took hold. He hadn't spoken to Nicky for three days--er, four days--either. Was she mad? Lexi seemed okay, but that was Lexi. Lexi was an enigma.

"Um, sure?" Then Nicky lowered her voice too quietly for him to hear. 

Lexi lowered her's in turn and soon both were whispering to each other. 

Charlie felt strangely left out. Were they talking behind his back? Gossiping? Having real girl talk, and not the fake thing he had Lexi had been engaged in? He didn't know, and the anxiety had him hopping in place.

Finally, something happened. The ice groaned as a comparatively small lapras plunked herself out of the dip in the beach she had been hiding inside. He figured it must have been a bit off the beach itself, perhaps under the ice, letting her hide in the ocean and only occasionally peak out using her long neck. But he couldn't say for sure--it was difficult to tell where the beach ended and the ice began.

Nicky's head was low as she shuffled her way across the ice and onto the packed snow of the beach proper. She gently tapped her front flippers together in what he knew to be a nervous tick of hers. "Hi, Charlie."

"Hey, Nicky," he replied, feeling equally as awkward as she looked. 

Silence. Nicky's flippers made little plop sounds as she struck them together harder. "Do you really have a crush on me?"

His heart skipped a beat. "Y-yeah." What else could he say? It was obvious she heard them. The only question was how much. Did she know about him and Lance? Did she know they kissed? 

Nicky whispered under her breath, "Coool..."

It was so quiet that he barely heard it. But he did hear it. And given the sound of her flippers, she knew he heard, and so her flippers slapped together even more vigorously. 

Plop. 

Bloop. 

PloOop. 

"Anyways," Lexi loudly exclaimed, snapping Charlie and Nicky out of their stupors. "Nicky told me that she apparently arrived as she was mentioned." The meaning in the look Lexi gave him then was obvious: she doesn't know about you and Lance. Figure something out, fuck if I know how to handle this.

That did absolutely nothing to help Charlie's growing apprehension.

Nicky scooted across the ice, head low. "I'm sorry. Um. For eavesdropping. Um." Her big eyes met his. He squirmed at the attention. She looked just as cute as ever. "I want to say something, but I don't know if-- I kinda-- " she buried her head in her flippers and whispered, "Oh gosh, can I really say it?" She took a deep breath and raised her head again. "I have a crush on you too! There! I said it!"

As Nicky ducked her head again, her large cheeks glowing bright pink, Charlie could only gape. Well. This isn't complicated at all. If only she had told me last week.

She looked up. "I told you my feelings, why aren't you responding?"

He felt lost. It was strange. Charlie still felt attracted to her. But now he was with Lance. Kissing totally made them a thing. What could he do except turn her down and break her heart?

"P-please, say something…"

His beak wouldn't move, but Charlie's heart dropped at Nicky's increased desperation. He had to tell her something. He couldn't just stare awkwardly and hope the situation resolved itself. That wasn't fair to Nicky. It wasn't fair at all.

"About that," Charlie winced at his terrible opener, "I'm kinda, sorta, maybe dating Lance now?"

A flipper slammed into the ice with a resounding bang. "What?! But you said you-- I thought-- huh?!"

Charlie could appreciate her confusion. He was confused too. 

"It just sorta happened?" Charlie said weakly. While the same explanation he gave Lexi, it wasn't wrong. "He kissed me and--"

The flipper came down again. "You kissed?! When? Where? How? Why?"

"Um, last night," he replied awkwardly. "You're really cute and you're one of my best friends, but…" he trailed off once he realized there was no easy way to say it. Looking into Nicky's eyes, he could tell she was close to tears. 

All while Lexi looked on with uncharacteristic silence. 

He prepared himself to say it gently ease her into the truth, only for Lexi to do it her own way. "Lance beat you to it," she said. Both pokemon looked at her with wide-eyes. "What? It's true! I'm not going to beat around the bush here. It would only make things more awkward. Lance kissed Charlie before you gained the courage to. That is it. I'm sorry, Nicky, but you should have told Charlie how you felt when I told you to."

"Hey, that's not very nice!" Charlie scolded her. "It's not Nicky's fault. Don't blame her for being shy!"

His defense of Nicky seemed to rile the lapras up, because she plopped over to Lexi and glared. "Yeah! What Charlie said! It's not my fault I was born with flippers and can't climb a dumb mountain to visit my best friend." Charlie heard the stressing of best, and he could tell Lexi knew exactly what was being implied. Ouch. "You know how badly I wanted to visit Charlie, to make him feel better. I wanted to be there for him, but I couldn't climb a hill to save my life, let alone a dumb cliffside!"

"Would you have told him your feelings if you could have visited?"

Her fire evaporated with poof. "N-no… but I shouldn't have, either. Charlie just discovered, um, the thing, and wasn't feeling well. Charlie needed a friend. But then Lance goes ahead and makes it all about himself! Probably planned it, too! 'Oh no, Charlie is all sad and confused, perfect chance to make him feel better, then when he's the happiest-- bam! Hit him with more emotional baggage!'

Charlie opened his beak to defend Lance, only to close it with a snap. Was Nicky wrong? That was kind of exactly what Lance did. Sure, it worked out in the end, but in that moment, hearing Lance's feelings when it was the last thing he wanted on top of everything else, it hurt. It hurt a lot. 

Is Nicky right? Did Lance plan this? Or did he go into it as a friend and his feelings simply spilled out?

He shook his head. "No. Lance isn't like that, and you know it. That's a mean thing to say. Oh, and right now, you're making it all about you. Exactly what you're accusing Lance of. Lay off him."

Tears filled Nicky's eyes, and Charlie had a feeling he handled that poorly. "B-but, but, but-- I'm sorry! I know he's not like that a-a-and I know he's a sweetie and kind and shy too, but it's not fair!" Her flippers were plopping again. "When I heard you l-liked me, I thought-- I was so sure this day was going to be amazing. I'd tell you I like you too, you get happy, and then we kiss and nuzzle and cuddle and stuff! It would've been perfect! It would've been romantic. But Lance did it first. That's cool. Good for him. I'm h-happy for-- I'm-- I’m happy f-for--" 

Nicky started sobbing. Charlie was at a loss. Lexi, however, was on the scene and immediately went to hug the hyperventilating lapras. "Shh, it's okay, Nicky. I'm here. We're here." Lexi looked his way with narrowed eyes. "Charlie, get your bird butt over here and hug our friend."

"But won't that just make things wor--"

"Now, Charlie!"

Charlie jumped off his perch and spread his wings, landing next to the crying lapras with practiced grace. He kept his wings open, hesitated for a moment, but then the sounds of Nicky's sobbing broke through his stupor and he wrapped his wings around her lengthy neck. 

They stayed like that for a while, holding Nicky. They were there for her. He was there for her. Even though he was the cause of her strife, she didn't pull away. Quite the opposite. She leaned into his hug, her cool, scaly skin pressed against his body. In any other circumstance, his heart would be racing a mile a minute. He'd be blushing and sputtering and trying his best to not squander this moment.

But not here. At this moment, Nicky needed him. Even if he couldn't give himself to her the way she wanted it--the way he still kind of wanted it too--he could still be there for her as a friend. 

"Do you still like me?" Nicky muttered. He almost thought he had imagined the question, until she continued with, "I know you're with Lance, but do you still feel anything for me? Or was the past tense really past tense? It's okay if you don't. I can h-handle it. Thank you for the hug. You're very warm. It’s nice."

Yes, I do still have a crush on you. But Lance makes me feel things you never did. 

He had a hunch that wouldn't go over well. 

"I--"

"I have an idea!"

Charlie pulled away from Nicky to stare at Lexi. She grinned at him. There was a twinkle in her eyes that he did not like. Nicky also stared at her, only she was using her lengthy neck to do so. 

"Okay, guys, hear me out. What if you two kissed? That way Charlie could decide if he likes Lance for Lance, or if he simply loves getting all kissy kissy."

"What?!" cried Nicky and Charlie together. They looked at each other with twin blushes. Charlie continued first, "I can't do that! Isn't that cheating?"

Lexi twirled a claw in the air. "I mean, it's not not cheating. Come on, just don't tell Lance and it's fine. I know you both want to~"

"We can't do that," Nicky said, to Charlie's surprise. He thought she would jump at the opportunity. He sure would if the roles were reversed. His respect for her grew. "It's not fair to Lance. I might be… jealous… um, but I'm not mean. He's my friend too."

"It's not mean! Think about it this way. He only kissed Charlie last night, right? So they've barely been together for a day. In fact, Charlie. Did you two decide you were dating, or did you just kiss and stuff?"

Charlie ruffled his feathers. "Uhhh, isn't dating implied? We kind of kissed a lot." 

Nicky squirmed. 

"Like, a lot lot." 

A flipper plopped. 

"With tongue and everything." 

The second flipper joined in.

Lexi stepped back a bit. "Oookay, fine. Maybe you're right. Hey, Nicky. Wanna kiss me instead?" She winked at the lapras, who let out the most adorable squeak. "Haha, just kidding! Or am I?"

Nicky’s cheeks burned so brightly that if she were a fire type he was positive they’d combust. "C’mon, Lexi,” he urged. “Stop teasing Nicky."

“Oh, come off it,” Lexi said with a wave of a claw. “She’s fine. A bit of teasing will do our adorably meek friend some good.” 

“I’m not meek,” Nicky said meekly. They both stared at her. She lasted for all of two seconds before putting a fipper up to her mouth and giggling. “Okay, maybe I’m teeny bit meek.”

“See? She agrees with me!” Charlie couldn’t argue with that. A smile reached Nicky’s deep brown eyes, and he returned it with a smile of his own. “Anyways,” Lexi continued, “what do you guys wanna do now? After all that lovely drama, I’m dying for something fun! Oh! Can we ride you down the big hill again, Nicky? Pleeeease?”

Nicky seemed to grow smaller, which was a novel feat given how much larger she was than them. “Um, okay. Just please don’t grab my tail if you’re failing off again, Charlie. You have wings.”

Charlie hopped in place, feathers ruffling. “That was one time,” he muttered, though couldn’t help but grin. A distraction did sound nice. The lapras was a wonderful ride--that came out wrong--and sliding down the only snow-covered-hill with an incline Nicky could actually climb was an experience. 

This is nice, he thought as he and his friends-minus-one walked away from the beach together, Maybe being a girl won’t be so different after all.