Stupid Story
 
⚠GRAPHIC AND/OR EXPLICT CONTENT AHEAD! VIEWER DISCRETION IS STRONGLY ADVISED!⚠ 

All the characters in this story are furries.

“Joe! Joe! Joe! Wake up you r*tard!” Joe was daydreaming about becoming a world-renowned serial killer when his teacher clobbered him in the head with a 200-ton textbook. “Ow-wee!” Joe shrieked. “You broke my concentration.” “Oh, podge! You were merely dreaming about being a serial killer again, which is cool and all, but we’re in the middle of a lesson,” the teacher said, clouting him on the head with a steel crowbar. She calmly walked up to the board and wrote down a rocket science-type math equation. She promptly initiated her stopwatch, setting it to thirty seconds. “You have thirty seconds. Anyone who conks out again will be sent to Alcatraz… I mean prison… I mean Gulag… I mean detention.” The teacher cocked her gun as usual, which was her warning. “John!” she screamed. “Quit picking your %^&*@#$% nose in my class.” She sped over to John’s desk and shoved the booger back in his nose. “You kids are a bunch of f**king wankers!” She shouted, face beet-red. “Your mommies and daddies should have terminated you long ago.” Joe raised his hand. “Why won’t they terminate me now?” he questioned insightfully. “Because then they’d go to jail,” the teacher returned. When Joe got home, he opened the door, and a spiky boxing glove flung out of the open doorway and knocked three of his teeth out. “That’s for your report card,” his dad growled. “But it was an ‘A’,” Joe said. “Not anymore. I just crossed it out right now and made it an ‘F’ just so I could punch you in the face.” Joe went downstairs to his room and began working on his homework. The first question was simple: if you have one penis and you add another penis, how many babies do you have? Joe wrote down zero. At the bottom of the page, there was a note from the teacher. It read in part: I have always sort of liked you, I know your d*ck is big, but I feel that you are too stupid for me. I will be finding someone with a bigger brain and a bigger d*ck. Yours not truly, Mrs. Pratt. Joe was stunned. Whose penis could be bigger than his? He was 14 inches at least. Joe went downstairs and asked his dad, “Dad, do you think my dildo is big?” His dad let out a hearty laugh. “Big? Well, yes; but not anywhere near as big as mine,” Joe’s dad pulled down his boxers, revealing a 45-inch penis. “Darn,” said Joe. 

“Don’t be down, kiddo,” Joe’s dad said, wrapping his arm around Joe. “Try this crystal meth. It’ll help ease your pain.” “Gee! Thanks, Dad!” Joe said. He grabbed a funnel and began to snort as much as he could. When Joe was done, he broke for the door. “Where the hell are you going?” asked his mom. “To murder practice,” Joe responded. “Same as always.” “You forgot your kissy-kissy,” his mother said, puckering her lips. Joe and his mom quickly French kissed before Joe headed out the door. “Don’t forget your heroine,” his mom called. “I won’t!” Joe shouted back, sticking up both his middle fingers. 

The End