Erin had only ever been injured enough to enter a healing coma once before in her life. She’d never been the most athletic child, and had often gone out of her way to avoid situations where she might get injured. Of course, obviously she hadn’t managed to avoid Maggie, who had been enough to put all of them out of commission for a full week. It hadn’t been a pleasant experience.

This time was worse. Her head hurt, an almost agonizing pounding headache. Probably from the lack of hydration and also from nearly being dead. The last time she’d been in a healing coma, she’d at least been in a hospital. They’d been able to tend to her physical needs – food and water and so on – while she recovered. This time she was in a fucking hole in the ground with no hospital in sight. Or at least not a manned one, she couldn’t be certain there wasn’t a hospital of some sort in the city somewhere.

“Oogh. How long was I out?” she muttered, and received no response. Slowly, agonizingly, she pulled herself upright. Her muscles, much like her head, ached, her joints creaking in protest as she attempted to move them. It took her significantly more time to transfer from lying on the bench to sitting on it than it normally would have, but she managed it. Rubbing her still throbbing head, she reached down and grabbed her PET.

“Oh, good. It’s tomorrow,” she said with a frustrated groan. “I was worried it was going to be next month or something. I guess replenishing all of my blood only took twenty four hours. Ugh.” Ami had only given them so much time to work with, and here she was wasting an entire day being unconscious. “I hope the others managed to make literally any progress while I was out,” she muttered, knowing full well that they didn’t. She could tell even without taking in her surroundings that they were in the fucking park still. Of course they’d not made any progress considering one quarter of the team was dead weight, to say nothing of Vienna and Ursula’s own injuries.

Speaking of the others, both Vienna and Ursula were lying sprawled on the ground without even the slightest hint of makeshift bedding. Presumably they had dedicated all of the spare clothing to forming the mound that had acted as her own pillow. “Ugh, you didn’t need to give me all of it, you idiots,” she muttered sullenly, grabbing the pile of clothing and marching over to the backpack. She jammed them in roughly, pulling out a protein bar. “Need food,” she grunted, taking a big bite out of it. “Ugh. That’s already better.”

Erin took in the situation, but there wasn’t really much to take in. They were exactly where they had started. The exit was literally within sight for fuck’s sake, and she couldn’t use it without losing an arm. Again. That she fucking had to specify it wouldn’t be the first time was more of an indignity than she cared to accept, frankly. “Right. Titania?”

“I’m here,” her Kadabra replied from nowhere. It was unsettling, like she was speaking directly into her mind – probably because it was.

“How is the, ah, prana situation?”

“Still low, but not so low that you’re at risk of dying. It’s... actually somewhat impressive that you recovered this quickly. Usually that kind of prana burnout is... Well, not something you recover from. At all. I was expecting you to be out for at least a few days.”

“Oh, lovely,” Erin muttered. “Well whatever I’m not dead. That’s the important takeaway. Let’s tend to the others, I want to get this farce over with.”

It was at that moment that Erin noticed Viola wasn’t present. She frowned slightly. It made sense, she supposed, that Viola would be awake, considering that she had remained relatively uninjured. But... That she wasn’t present felt off. Surely Ursula and Vienna wouldn’t have left her on watch. Surely Viola wouldn’t have left her friends asleep right by where the pre-splice soldiers were waiting for them to try anything funny.

Slowly, she found her vision drifting to the exit. “... No. No, she wouldn’t be that stupid. Outside of Aubrey suddenly remembering that her Kadabra power is being immune to bullets there is no way she would have made it out safely. And besides that she wouldn’t have left Vienna behind in a million years.” Had this happened a few days ago, Erin mused, she probably wouldn’t have been so quick to dismiss Viola potentially abandoning them, but no. It just didn’t make sense. Ursula, perhaps. Or if Vienna and Viola were missing. But certainly not just Viola.

“But then where on earth is she?” Erin mused, wandering over to Vienna’s side. She grabbed the rabbit by the shoulder and shook her. Gently at first, then not so gently. “Hey, rise and shine. We’re burning daylight and I’m not waiting for you.”

“Mnf.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, wake up!” she snapped, giving Vienna a rough shove.

“Ack! What?”

“Good, you’re awake.”

“What happened?”

“I woke you up.”

“You did?” Vienna rubbed her head, pulling herself up. “Erin?”

“Yes.”

“You’re awake?”

“It appears so.”

“Good. We need to get going.”

“That would be why I woke you, yes. Grab something to eat, I’ll go wake up Ursula.”

“No time,” Vienna replied tersely, attempting to pull herself upright. Her attempt failed miserably and she flopped backwards onto her back.

“Hey, hey, take it easy,” Erin said, rushing back to Vienna’s side.

“No time to take it easy, we’ve gotta get moving. Now.”

“Well, yes, we’ve only got... Three and a half days left, give or take, depending on how generous Ami is about counting the first day. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take the time to wake up and eat and not hurt yourself.”

“They took Viola.”

The words hit Erin about as hard as she had hit the sphinx. Her heart sank – she had expected something, to be sure. But to hear pretty much the worst case scenario get confirmed was... unpleasant, to say the least. “... I see.”

Vienna once again attempted to pull herself upright and once again failed. “Oogh, okay, maybe take like five minutes to wake up and then we need to get going.”

“That seems like a plan, yes. Also we probably shouldn’t be leaving Ursula behind.”

“Yeah, yeah, go wake her up, I’m gonna crawl to the food.”

“Okay.” Erin rushed over to Ursula’s side, filled with a sudden sense of urgency. It probably wouldn’t do to rush, of course. But, well. It certainly wouldn’t do to dawdle either. She gave the doberman a good solid kick. “Hey, wake up.”

“Ow! What the fuck?!”

“Good, you’re awake,” she said a second time. “Get up and eat. Apparently while I was unconscious Viola got kidnapped?”

“She did? Is that what they did?”

“Vienna says so.”

“Fuck,” Ursula snapped, pulling herself into a sitting position. “They came outta nowhere. Hit us with these... fuckin’ tiny-ass dart things, apparently some kinda sleepy juice.”

“And you’ve been out since?”

“What time is it?”

“Noon.”

“Okay, good,” Ursula muttered to herself, slowly standing up. “At least it’s not been too long, the trail’s prolly still fresh.”

“Noon tomorrow.”

“Oh. Fuck.”

“We’ve been out a whole day?” Vienna interjected, walking over with two bars. She handed one to Ursula and ate the other herself.

“It would seem so.”

“Fuck,” Ursula said again. “Okay, uhhhhh... We need a plan.”

“That would be your job as Alpha, darling.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know, gimme a minute,” Ursula grumbled, quickly downing what was probably the first meal she’d had in more than a day – a fucking protein bar. “Okay so there’s obviously a lotta places they could be hiding. First order of business is to start narrowing things down. Somehow.”

“That’s easier said than done,” Vienna responded.

“Yeah but we’ve got superpowers now, right? That’s gonna help. Let’s take stock of what we can do.”

“I can make force fields.”

“I can grow.” Erin crossed her arms, awkwardly, manoeuvring around breasts that currently weren’t actually there. “I did some experimentation in my dreams. It seems I wasn’t too far off in my estimation of my maximum size. Around twenty feet?”

“Nice,” Ursula said, earning her a pair of dirty looks. “I mean you could grow twenty feet tall and have a higher vantage point to see if you can spot anything out of the ordinary, geeze.”

“That... actually isn’t that bad of a plan. The buildings look taller than twenty feet, though, and I don’t know how long I’ll be able to maintain my maximum size. If we need to fight, I want to be able to contribute.”

“Okay, how about I use my force fields to lift you up and we scout that way?” Vienna said. “I don’t think my power is nearly as expensive as yours.”

“Okay, good. We’ve got a working plan.”

“What about Delphi? Did you ever figure out what she does?”

“She refuses to tell me,” Ursula replied with a shrug.

“Delphi?”

“Ursula’s Inkling.”

“Inkling?”

“Ugh,” Ursula groaned, although it became clear very quickly that it wasn’t actually Ursula. Dark blue inky goo flowed from nowhere, enveloping her body in her Inkling’s form. “See this? This is why I wanted to wait until everyone was conscious before expositing. This will be the third goddamn time I’ll have to explain this to you all and let me tell you, it’s a staggering waste of our time.”

“It’s not a waste of time!” Titania snapped back, emerging from Erin as abruptly as Delphi had from Ursula. “Our hosts need to know these things! I need to know these things!”

“Okay, but I have an idea,” Ursula interrupted – really Ursula this time. Although Delphi had the same voice, they sounded like completely different people in every other respect. “How about you don’t fucking take over my body without letting me know in advance ever again?”

“It’s my body too. You’re just going to have to learn how to share, host.”

“Oi! It was my body first! And I’ve got a name!”

“Yes and I don’t care.”

“Fuck you!”

“Guys,” Vienna interrupted. “Not the fucking time for bickering. Come on, let’s go find a mirror or window or something so everyone can be involved.”

“The host’s input is unnecessary,” Delphi responded tersely. “I can fill Titania in from here just fine, thank you.”

“Hey, I’m literally right here, asshole!”

“Guys if you don’t stop fighting I will lose my shit.” Delphi opened her mouth to respond, but then Edifice came out and that was clearly enough for second thoughts. “Viola is missing, Aubrey is missing with her, we do not have the time for petty bickering. The buildings are mirrored, it would be most efficient for us to do the necessary scouting and then for Delphi to fill us all in as we head towards wherever they’re holding Viola.”

“Tch. Fine.” With that, Delphi once again retreated inside of Ursula.

“God, what a fucking bitch.”

“She’s not that bad, once you get to know her,” Titania said. “She’s just... stressed. And probably concerned for your wellbeing.”

“Ha, yeah sure that makes sense,” Ursula replied sardonically.

“She is! She’s got a very strong moral compass and she’s always been very concerned for the wellbeing of hosts. I... I’m certain of that.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Ursula waved dismissively. “I’m sure she’s just abrasive or whatever. I mean look at who I’m friends with.” That earned her dirty looks from both of the remaining Inklings. “I mean, like, just ‘cause someone seems like a jerk at first doesn’t mean they’ve not got their reasons or whatever.” She threw up her hands in exasperation. “Whatever! Let’s just get going!”

“Yes. We’re wasting time. Titania, retreat into Erin for now.” Titania seemed reluctant, but followed Edifice’s orders. “Now,” the inkling said. “Is anyone here afraid of heights?”

~~~~~~

Viola honestly couldn’t bring herself to feel anything about the fact that she had apparently been kidnapped. Certainly not surprise. If anything, it was the logical next step in how her day had been going. Though, really, by this point it had been more than a day. They were well into the fourth day since the downward spiral had begun. Looking back on it now, getting assigned mandatory community service as something of a misguided attempt at a teambuilding exercise felt almost nostalgic. She missed the profound terror at having to deal with the inevitable constant arguments between her pack. God, that was fucked up.

And now she’d been actually literally kidnapped, and all she could feel was numb. She sat, hunched over with her knees pulled tightly against her chest, and glowered at her captors. There were four of them – three of which she’d already met. Yuri was in the centre of their makeshift camp, tending to what appeared to be a small campfire. Viola wasn’t really sure why they’d made a campfire. They didn’t seem to be cooking anything, and it wasn’t cold or anything. Makoto was looming beside her, making it very clear that attempting to leave was ill advised. Viola had attempted to turn on the peoplefinder app almost immediately upon waking up; that had resulted in her PET getting confiscated. Bob had it currently and was idly flipping through her files. Her files, dammit. That earned him an especially sharp glare.

“Bob, for fuck’s sake, stop digging through the kid’s phone, it’s fucking weird.”

“Excuse me for bein’ curious ‘bout the glorious future.”

“You can be curious about the future without violating her privacy jesus fucking christ.”

“Fine, fine. Wasn’t even’ readin’ anything.” Bob put the PET down on the ground beside him. “If the little lady behaves herself, she can maybe have it back. Maybe.”

Viola let out a small harumph in response. “See? You’ve pissed her off even more than she already was. Now she’s gonna be difficult and it’s all your fault.”

Bob rolled his eyes, flopping over onto his back. “Whaaaaatever. Wake me up if anythin’ interesting happens.”

“Oh my god.” Makoto rolled her eyes. “Someone keep an eye on the kid, I’m gonna go kick his ass.”

“You can’t kick my ass, I’m your superior offic-ack! Stop that I’m defenceless!”

Viola elected to ignore their antics for now, turning her attention to the rest of the camp. Though, really, there wasn’t much to look at. They were outside some nondescript skyscraper on a nondescript abandoned street that looked almost identical to every other nondescript street in this godforsaken place. Viola found herself with her back to the building, slightly offset from the campfire. The fourth soldier sat across from her, on the other side of the fire from Yuri. She had adopted the same position as Viola, curled up with her arms pulled tightly around her legs, staring at the rabbit over her knees. Whenever Viola’s gaze settled on her, her eyes darted away, but it was very clear that she was staring. “What are you looking at?” Viola said, probably a bit meaner than was strictly necessary for just being observed. But then again, this person was complicit in kidnapping her.

The fourth soldier let out a soft eep and ducked behind her legs entirely in response.

“Ugh.” Viola rolled her eyes in an exaggerated enough motion that it took the rest of her head with it. “What’s her deal?”

“Oh, are you talking to us now?” Yuri responded. Viola glared and said nothing. “She doesn’t talk. Not really good with people when she’s not working.”

“Oh.” Viola suddenly found herself feeling profoundly guilty, though she wasn’t really sure why considering that, again, this person was complicit in kidnapping her. “She... can’t talk?”

“She can, she just doesn’t,” Yuri replied with a shrug, poking the fire with a stick.

“Oh.”

“It’s not really my place to go into more detail. I’d suggest asking her yourself but, uh, that’s not gonna work for obvious reasons.” He shrugged again. “Besides, I don’t think you’ve got the cultural context to understand why she doesn’t talk anyway.”

“What’s her name?” Viola said after a moment. It felt weird, talking about her like she wasn’t there. She didn’t seem to mind, at least, though it was admittedly hard to tell. She’d gone back to shyly staring at Viola whenever she thought the rabbit wasn’t looking.

“Jeon Sun-Hi. Asian, so family name first and then personal name. Just call her Sunny, though. I’m pretty sure she prefers Sunny. That’s what we all call her at least.”

“Okay.” Viola turned her attention back to Sunny, who intently stared at her knees and not Viola. “It’s, uh. Nice to meet you. I guess?” She gave a small wave in response, which Viola supposed  counted as progress.

“And just for the record, I’m Yuri Ovcharenko. The dynamic duo over there are Tanaka Makoto – same as with Sunny, family name first and personal name second – and Robert Jefferson.”

“Stop kicking me!”

“No.”

“Are they always like that?”

“Yes.”

“I’m so sorry.”

Yuri shrugged. “Enh, you get used to it after a few centuries.”

That reminded Viola of probably the biggest, most burning question she had about the whole situation. “How are you all still... alive? At all?” she asked after another moment of awkward silence.

“That’s a very long story.”

“I’ve got time.”

“Fair enough. The short version is that we’re cyborgs. Survived the skin plague by not having any fleshy bits left to get infected.” He held up a gloved hand and pinched his cheek.

“Oh. You, uh. Don’t really look-”

“Yeah, they made a big ol’ deal about it. Made us look cartoon character-y so we don’t look weird and inhuman. Or something like that, I don’t really understand the specifics.” Once again, Yuri shrugged. “And before you ask, I’ve got no earthly idea how they managed to keep the fleshy bits we’ve got left alive for five plus centuries.”

“I’ve got a theory,” Bob interjected. At some point Makoto had decided to stop kicking at him, and had returned to looming over Viola.

“Oh, boy.”

“See, our brains ain’t actually kept in our bodies. We ain’t allowed to know where they actually are for security reasons, but the way it works is they’re kept in big ol’ tubes and there’s a computer that interprets the signals they send out and then sends them over to our bodies. Y’follow me so far?” Viola didn’t reply, but Bob didn’t really seem to care. “Anyway, my theory for how they kept us alive this long izzat they didn’t. At some point our brains died, but the computers just kept sending signals to our bodies outta inertia. Basically they were interpreting our thoughts for so long that eventually they just started thinking like us on their own. Like Ghost in the Shell but real life.”

“Oh my god, you’re such a fucking nerd.”

“Who’s the bigger nerd in this situation. The one who made the reference, or the one who got the reference?”

“Fuck you.”

Bob rolled his eyes, before reaching into a pouch and pulling out... something. A small conical packet topped with a lid of some sort – sort of like a medigel tube – which he tossed in Viola’s general direction. The rabbit briefly panicked and held her hands up to her face – the object bounced off of them and landed on the ground. “There, have some ration paste. Ain’t exactly haute cuisine, but it’s got all the nutrients you’re gonna need to keep goin’.”

“Okay.” She tentatively picked up the ration paste and turned its container over in her hands, desperately trying to figure out how to actually eat it.

“You twist the top and squ- no, no, other direction. Like toothpaste.”

“Toothpaste?”

“Yeah. Do y’all not have toothpaste?”

“We have toothpaste.”

“Well then I don’t see what the problem is.”

“I’m trying to wrap my head around the fact that you store food in tubes.”

“It’s compact. You can carry a month’s worth ‘a these and still have room for the rest of your gear. It’s easy to eat, too, if you don’t fuckin’ overthink it.”

“I’m not overthinking it! It’s just dumb!”

Bob laughed. “You’re right about that one. It’s a pain in the ass to eat, and it doesn’t even taste good. But it’s what we’ve got so y’all’re gonna hafta deal.”

“Yippee,” Viola grumbled, opening the lid and squeezing a glob of brown goo directly into her mouth. “Ack!” She swallowed as much of it as she could manage before spitting out the rest. “Oh god it tastes awful!”

“Damn straight. Soap and feet. Here,” He tossed her something else – and this time she caught it. “Wash it down with that. ‘s just water with sugar and some electrolytes in it. More chemicals, but at least they’re tasty chemicals.”

Viola gagged a bit, but managed to quickly unscrew the top of the canteen and guzzle down a good amount of what tasted like lemon soda without the carbonation. “How can you eat that?”

“We don’t! Cyborgs, remember. Ain’t even got stomachs no more.” Bob grinned widely. “Best part ‘a the whole transhumanism thing is we never need to fuck around with a goddamn ration ever again.”

“It’s disgusting.”

“Yeah, well, when your options are eatin’ stuff that tastes bad or starvin’, soap and feet starts to sound pretty fuckin’ tasty.”

“Ugh.” Viola glowered sullenly at the tube, as though that would magically make it taste better. Her mind wandered back to home. “... I miss my mom.”

“Don’t worry, kid. If all goes accordin’ to plan, you’ll be seein’ her again within a week.”

Something about that sounded off. “What are you talking about?”

“That’d be spoilers. Eat your paste.”

“I don’t wanna eat my paste, it’s gross.” Still, like Bob had said, starving sounded an awful lot worse than soap and feet, so she grimaced and sucked down as much as she could stomach. It tasted beyond awful. She hadn’t in her entire life imagined something could taste so bad. Soap and feet was an understatement. It tasted bitter and acrid, like something you weren’t supposed to put in your mouth. And beyond that there was a sort of tinge of umami, like someone had taken an overcooked steak, put it in a blender, and then soaked it in lye. It lingered on the palate, too. The flavoured water didn’t help in the slightest, and if anything almost made it worse, spreading the chemical taste around her mouth even further.

Eventually Viola elected that she’d eaten enough of the paste and just plain couldn’t stomach any more. She was mildly impressed that she’d stomached a full third of the tube, but also a bit worried that she’d only managed a third of the tube given that she didn’t actually know how much a serving was. “Do I have to eat all of it?”

“Yeah, but not all at once. It’s meant to be a full day’s worth of nutrition and calories.”

Viola tuned out the instant Yuri clarified that she didn’t need to eat the whole thing, quickly putting the cap back on and then just sort of dropping the tube to the ground where it could fucking stay until she absolutely had to eat some more as far as she was concerned. She followed it up by downing a little bit more of the water – she elected not to drink all of it, as she didn’t know if they had any more available – and then also put the lid on it and placed it on the ground a bit more gently.

With that done, Viola suddenly found herself at a loss for what to do next. She wasn’t particularly tired, which made sense given she’d spent the better part of twenty four hours unconscious. Normally, in this situation, she would turn on some music and zone out for a few hours. But Bob still had her PET, and anyway she found herself profoundly not in the mood for music. Or much of anything, really, not that she had any other options for ways to pass the time that weren’t also on her PET. She could, she supposed, come up with some kind of escape plan. But that would be fucking stupid and almost certain to get her actually killed. Maybe, if Aubrey spontaneously remembered her superpower, that would be one thing. But as it was, Viola was only human. She didn’t stand a chance against the soldiers no matter what she did.

That left exactly one thing she could do aside from mope and eat. There was a heavy lump in her hoodie’s pocket, and she reached in and pulled out a clear plastic box that contained her cards.

There wasn’t really much of a market for cards among normal people. The designs had a certain appeal, but for the most part the only people who owned decks were... well, people like Lars or people who were at some point like Lars. The occult associations were just too strong, even if they were bullshit. Which was why the designs on the cards were so mystical and weird. Stars and wands and occult symbolism. Insects and machines and wizards and demons. Viola would have preferred the more simple, standard pre-splice designs. But she took what she could get. Careful not to drop any on the ground, she took the cards out and began to shuffle.

“Oh, hey, izzat a deck of cards?”

“O-oh, um... Yes?”

“Huh, woulda thought you wouldn’t still have those.” Bob smiled wistfully. “Hey, wouldja mind dealin’ us in? We used to play poker in the downtime between missions, but a deck ‘a cards ain’t exactly built to last for five hundred years ‘a fairly regular use.”

“Um.” Viola felt suddenly flustered. She’d not expected her cards to draw any attention. “I don’t know what that is.”

“What, poker? ‘s a game you play with cards.”

“You can play games with them?”

“Yep.”

“What did you think they were for?” Makoto interjected, a bit condescendingly.

“Um,” Viola muttered shyly, suddenly acutely aware that she was the centre of attention. “W-well, um... here, let me show you.”

Viola wasn’t really sure what she was thinking, but she’d already started. She did a few flourishes, getting the cards decently shuffled, before fanning the deck and holding it up. “Um. P-pick a card?”

“Ah, shit, magic! I loved that shit as a kid, tried to get into it but I was never any good.” Bob quickly darted over to where Viola was sitting, startling the smaller bun. He sat across from her with a big grin on his face. “Here, lemme, Makoto’s kind of a killjoy about this kinda thing.”

“I am not a killjoy,” Makoto retorted.

“Right, you just hate fun.”

“I’d rather play poker than fuck around with sleight of hand bullshit,” she responded with a shrug.

“Well, after this, we can teach the kid how to play five-card draw or somethin’. But right now I wanna see a god damn magic trick that shit’s the coolest.”

“It- it is?”

“Hell yeah it is.”

“It’s definitely more interesting than poking at a campfire we don’t even need,” Yuri interjected, walking over to join the small circle around Viola, standing to Bob’s right. Sunny scooted over to their commanding officer’s left, nodding vigorously.

“O-oh,” Viola mumbled again. “Well, um. Okay. Pick a card?”

Bob nodded, reaching over and taking a card. He still had a big childish grin on his face, like he was having the time of his life.

Maybe, Viola thought, this wouldn’t be so bad after all. She immediately dismissed that thought, of course. She’d been kidnapped and the world was going to end in four days, after all.

But at least now she had something to do.

~~~~~~

“So what exactly do you even do?”

“Hm?”

“Well, it’s like...” Ursula gestured vaguely as she walked. “Titania can make Erin bigger, Edifice does the sphere thing. What do you do?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“I think it’s at least a little bit my business if you’re gonna be living in my brain.” After Delphi had finished getting Erin up to speed, Ursula had elected to fall behind the others slightly, so she could have a marginally more private conversation with her Inkling. “Like, if you don’t have a superpower, then you’re kinda just a big ol’ load. Eating my soul or life force or whatever and not giving anything back.”

“I promise you that my power would be entirely useless in this situation,” Delphi responded sardonically – as if everything she said wasn’t already tinged with that arrogant irony.

“Well, then what’s stopping me from kicking you out?”

“Even if that were possible, which it isn’t, I would die.”

“Ugh, fuck. Fine. But y’all need to start pulling your weight because right now you’re kind of useless to me.”

That seemed to hit a nerve. “I am not useless.”

“You sure seem useless. No superpowers, you’re living off my soul or something-”

“Prana is not your soul!”

“Or something. And I’m like ninety percent sure you’ve been giving me nightmares for like a decade.”

“You could see that?”

“Yeah. Anyway the point is. What do I get outta this arrangement? ‘cause right now it kinda comes across as a straight negative for me.”

“Hmph. For starters, I do have a power. Every elite does. You just don’t get to use it.”

“Fine, fine, but you could at least tell me what it is.”

“No.”

“Ughhhhhh.”

“And that aside, I can assure you that you can get plenty of benefit out of my presence without using my power.”

“Okay! Now we’re gettin’ somewhere. Gimme the deets.”

“Please use real words.”

“No. Lay it on me.”

“Ugh.” Delphi rolled her eyes, or at least made the motion. She didn’t really have eyes to roll, so much as cartoony lines approximating eyes. The same applied to Titania and to Aubrey, really – Edifice outright didn’t have a face, which was weird and kind of creepy. But honestly at this point Ursula didn’t really care anymore. She was kind of tired of mentally pointing out that Inklings didn’t have facial features so much as they had approximations. “The big benefit would be Inking.”

“Like that thing where you bodyjack me? That doesn’t seem very beneficial to me.”

“I don’t have to be in control. It’s just more convenient.”

“You’re really not selling me on this.”

“You’ll like it, trust me.” Ursula rolled her eyes, but elected not to interject again. “For starters, Inklings are very durable. Very hard to injure. When I’m out, you won’t be immune to damage, but you will be very hard to hurt unless your opponent can force me off of you.”

“And how would they do that?”

“Physical trauma. Like... Punching you really hard over and over again in the same spot. Something like that.”

“Okay.”

“Hey, should you be telling them our big weakness just like that?” Edifice interjected.

“I don’t see how it could be detrimental.” Delphi shrugged. It was kind of unsettling, watching her reflection do things that she wasn’t doing – although somehow the fact that it wasn’t her in the reflection made it slightly better. “It’s not like we’re not on the same side. Besides, in case you’ve forgotten there’s apparently a civil war going on. I don’t remember any of the details, but there is a very good chance we might encounter Inklings who don’t share the same allegiance as us. Whatever that might be.”

“Right, I suppose that’s a good point. It would be best for them to know how to beat Inklings, in case we ever have to fight an Inkling.”

“Which reminds me, once we get back to the surface it would be wise to keep us a secret. Do not use our powers in public, and never ink where someone can see you if at all. There’s no telling who else might have an Inkling who wants to hurt us and will hurt you to get at us.”

“Okay, okay, this is all important information, but we’re getting off topic. What cool things can I do with you living in me?”

“This is the one you’ll like. Being inked generally increases your physical capabilities.”

“Huh?”

“Suppose you got into a fight with Viola through some arbitrary contrivance. Without being inked, she would obviously not stand a chance in any kind of physical confrontation. But if she were inked and you weren’t, she would be able to hold her own.”

“Bullshit.”

“I am one hundred percent serious. Being inked provides significant boosts to endurance and physical strength. You move faster and hit harder.”

“Okay. I’m slightly more sold on this whole Inkling thing now. Slightly.”

“Well, you’re already quite strong. I imagine being inked would probably be enough for you to punch holes in solid concrete. We could try it out now, if you’d like, there’s quite a lot of stuff to break with your newfound super strength.”

“Uh... No, that’s fine,” Ursula said, reluctantly. She did really want to try punching holes in concrete or ripping out street signs or bending streetlights. “I should probably save my prana or whatever for when I need it. We don’t know when Ami’s gonna throw another giant bull monster-”

“Minotaur,” Erin interjected.

“Giant bull monster at us.”

“Smart girl.”

“Anyway, what else can you do?”

“That’s pretty much it for powers you’re going to get to use,” Delphi responded tersely.

“Just ‘cos I’m not gonna use your powers doesn’t mean I don’t wanna know what they do.”

“If you’re not going to be using them then you don’t need to know what they are.”

“I’m not going to stop asking you until you tell me.”

“Then we’re going to be here a while.”

“Ughhhhhh.”

“Hey, speaking of giant monsters,” Vienna interrupted. “It’s been kinda quiet.”

“That’s a good point.” Erin frowned slightly. She had returned to her usual height and proportions – Delphi had been against it, but both Erin and Titania had insisted that the mouse was more than capable of maintaining that growth with minimal prana use. “I would have expected her to throw something at us by now?”

“I figured that getting Viola back is the thing she’s throwing at us?” Ursula said with a shrug. “I’m not gonna question not having to fight another giant bull monster.”

“We should still be wary,” Edifice said. “We need to conserve our energy as much as possible for the coming confrontation.”

“Yeah, those soldiers were tough,” Vienna said. “Even without them getting the drop on us, I’d rather save the superpower mojo for when we fight them.”

“Please just say prana, it’s not that hard, it’s less syllables than what you said instead and-”

“Shhhh,” Ursula interjected.

“Don’t you shush me!”

“Shut up, I think I heard something.” The doberman came to a halt, ears perking up slightly as she listened for... whatever it was she’d heard.

“We can’t afford to stop because you heard something. Unless you want your friend to remain kidnapped?”

“Shut up Delphi, I’m- Shit! Get down!”

Ursula lurched forward, catching Erin and Vienna with her arms and pulling them to the ground just in time to avoid something very large and black swooping directly into where they had just been standing. There was a loud crash as whatever it was broke through the building, leaving a big hole in the windows and the Inklings nowhere to be seen.

“What the fuck was that?!”

“I think Ami might have heard us complaining that she’d not made us fight any monsters,” Erin said wearily. “Maybe a harpy, or one of the Stymphalian birds, or possibly some sort of small dragon?”

“I really hope it’s not a dragon.”

“Guys now’s probably a bad time to be having this conversation, that thing could get back up and try and kill us at any second.” Vienna’s point was emphasized by a loud, piercing shriek from inside the building.

“Duly noted. Let’s get out of here before-”

Whatever Erin had to say was cut off by maniacal laughter echoing throughout the street. “Ha ha! So, you have managed to avoid the opening volley! A fluke, of course. Blind luck! The next assault will be more than enough to do you pernicious pests in!”

“The fuck did y’all just call us!?”

“I don’t know, but I don’t think the word pernicious means what he seems to think it means.”

“Guys we should run.”

None of them needed to be told twice. Ursula pulled herself mostly upright, scrambling away from the building the monster was in before she’d fully stood up. The other two followed shortly behind, pulling themselves together even as they ran out into the street. And not a moment too soon – the windows burst open and whatever it was burst out.

“What the fuck is that thing?” Ursula asked, not really expecting a satisfactory answer. She certainly couldn’t tell just by looking at it. Maybe Erin was more familiar with whatever mythological monster it was? All Ursula could see was some sort of giant bat. But also a human at the same time? Like a pre-splice human but with fur and a bat’s head and wings instead of arms. And a weird sort of costume, though one that didn’t seem to fit particularly well.

Whatever it was, it opened its mouth and let out a piercing shriek. Ursula’s hands reflexively went to cover her ears – it hurt. She couldn’t imagine how Vienna and Erin felt, considering their ears were bigger than hers. The glass on the building cracked, and it lunged forward at Ursula while her hands were busy covering her ears. “Ack!”

She caught it just in time to prevent it from completely bowling her over, grabbing it by the shoulders and holding it at arm’s length. It flailed wildly in a futile attempt to break free, struggling to get out of Ursula’s grip and bite her face off. It growled, snapping its jaws, sending spittle flying everywhere – mostly in Ursula’s face. “Ew,” she said as she did her best to hold the thing back. “Get- get offa me!” She punctuated her demand with a knee to the bat thing’s stomach, and then another and another. It winced more heavily with each blow, its grip weakening slightly, and Ursula took that opportunity to spin around and throw it into the street. “Fuck off!” she shouted, giving it a solid kick to the face before it could get up.

That turned out to be a bad idea. It quickly latched onto her foot with its teeth – thankfully her boots were tough enough that its razor sharp fangs couldn’t pierce them, but it still had a distressingly strong grip. “Gah! Gerrof!” Ursula kicked and flailed, but the beast stayed latched on firmly. This tactic wasn’t working, clearly – so she tried a new one. She planted her foot firmly on the ground, raised the foot he didn’t have a death grip on, and brought it down on his head as hard as she could. That was enough to get the thing to let out a scream of pain, and in the process to get Ursula free from its jaws. She darted backwards, out of its reach. The second she was out of range, Vienna grabbed the thing in a force field.

“What the fuck is that?!”

“I, um, I don’t know,” Erin said uncertainly. “Some sort of vampire, maybe?”

“What about that dude who was ranting earlier?”

“Guys,” Vienna said, her voice strained. “I don’t mean to interrupt but our friend here’s kind of a handful.” Red ink flowed out from nowhere, quickly replacing the rabbit with her Inkling. “Okay. That’s better. He’s lively, though. We should take him out quickly.”

“You’re in the best position to do that,” Ursula said. “I don’t wanna get close to it again, and- Shit!” The doberman moved quickly, leaping in between Vienna and the massive, muscular boar man who was charging at her. She caught it by the tusks, sliding backward slightly from the inertia. “God dammit, another one?!” The new arrival squealed angrily, wildly thrashing its head back and forth in an attempt to break free from Ursula’s grip.

“I don’t think these are anything from mythology,” Erin said, backing away from the other two and their fights. “At least not anything I’m familiar wi-ack!” Erin found herself falling backwards as the ground shook, and then again. “What on earth?”

As if in answer to her question, a shrill trumpeting noise. She quickly pulled herself upright and turned around, getting confirmation of what she already knew. “Oh. Good. An elephant man. I was just thinking that we could use one of those.”

The third animal person was enormous. The other two were large, but the elephant man had to be ten feet tall. It was very wide, too, and muscular – built like a power lifter. It loomed menacingly, taking a single heavy step towards the smaller mouse. Its footsteps left fucking cracks in the pavement beneath it from their sheer power.

“This... isn’t good, is it? We seem to be a bit surrounded.”

“We’ve got superpowers, we can take ‘em.”

“I wish I could share your enthusiasm, darling.”

“Your murine friend is correct!” interjected the bombastic voice from earlier. “You thought you could thwart my evil schemes, but you stand no chance against my mighty Beastmen, superpowers or no!”

“Where is that even coming from?” Ursula grunted, barely capable of saying anything while struggling to keep control of the boar man.

“I am above you woeful whelps! But I suppose it would only be fair to allow you to see the face of your doom!” Whoever it was jumped down from seemingly nowhere, landing gracefully in between Vienna and the bat man. He was yet another pre-splice human, though they could only tell by looking at his face – everything else was covered. Black rubber gloves covered his hands, with similar rubber boots on his feet. He wore a tattered lab coat that flowed in nonexistent wind, and which had some unsettlingly red stains. The mad scientist aesthetic was crowned off by big, thick goggles that obscured his eyes. “Behold, the instrument of your demise! You will rue the day you interfered with the brilliant plans of the invincible Beastmaker!”

Vienna stared blankly. It was all she could do, really, even if she didn’t completely lack a proper face due to the presence of Edifice. Erin was more interested in the still slowly approaching elephant man, while Ursula was focused on the boar, but Vienna couldn’t help but look at the apparent supervillain, because he was practically in her fucking face.

After a moment to process this development, she finally spoke up. “You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.”