>Another day, another tree fiddy.
>Not really, it’s just a normal Saturday in your small house.
>The house you share with a small grey batp0ny.
>Sure, she’s awkward and full of bad puns, but she helps pay the rent.
>You just wish she could figure out if she likes blood or fruit better.
>Lately, she’s been hinting at being more than just a roommate.
>Her social ineptitude and non-stop flow of puns is the only thing stopping you, really.
>You find her in the kitchen munching on a banana.
>As soon as she sees you, she hops up and walks into a sunny part of the room.
>You can’t tear your eyes off her.
>She’s never had this effect on you before, but now…
>[sparkling intensifies]
>”Like what you see, Anon?”
>Her coat sparkles, matching her eyes as she looks at you.
>It’s like a horrible car crash, or that obese woman from the Quik Trip back on earth.
>You want to stop looking, but you can’t look away.
“…just, no.”
>You walk over, scoop her up, and walk to the front door.
>”What are we going to do outside, Anon?”
“I don’t… This isn’t happening…”
>With a swift kick, the door is open and your sparkling roommate is on her ass in the front yard.
>She attempts to fly back inside, but you close the door before she even gets close.
>You stand and stare at the door as she pounds on the door, voice becoming more frantic.
>”ANON!!! Please let me back in!! I can’t be in the su- AARRHHHH!!!!”
>A high pitched screech rattles your very bones, and a tightness grips your stomach.
>A red pool forms under the door as the screech dies down.
“Oh no, what have I done?!”
>You’re sweating profusely as you kick the door open for a second time, dreading the scene before you.
>What greets you, though, is a still sparkling pony holding an empty can of tomato juice in her fangs.
>She drops the can and snickers.
>”Jeez Anon, I was hoping to brighten you day. I figured some body glitter would really lighten the mood.”
“God dammit, Misty.”